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[1991-02-24-WCW-Wrestle War '91] Fabulous Freebirds vs Doom

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The Freebirds have a ridiculous number of people accompanying them to the ring, which was the whole reason I wanted to put this entrance on. Diamond Dallas Page, Oliver Humperink (as Big Daddy Dink - and another Dusty guy returning) and quite a few Diamond Dolls.

 

Cut to the finish. Simmons looks awesome, but I worry that poor Jimmy Garvin is dead after those two moves. Reed tries to hit Simmons with brass knucks, but Hayes ducks and Garvin falls on top of Simmons for the pin. The Freebirds win tag titles that they have actually already lost.

 

Reed and Long end up turning on Simmons. It's a good segment, but I'm sad. Doom developed into a hell of a team, and they should have stayed together longer. It seems like he should have, but truth be told, Simmons never clicked as a singles star.

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I can't believe they Hump his own entrance. Like he is going to draw fans. I think the Simmons face run flopped because it seemed he didn't get built up with wins to put him in the main event. He went to feud with Luger with no real rhyme or reason. In 92 he again went straight to the top with no wins over main events or semi main eventers. He could have gotten over if they booked him as a rising star.

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The Freebirds entrance is possibly the most absurd thing I've ever seen--and that's coming weeks after watching the whole Black Scorpion saga! This is professional wrestling at its absolute least cool. Or in the words of George Carlin, "Freebirds, you ain't cool, you're fuckin' chilly. Chilly ain't never been cool."

 

Reed accidentally clobbers Simmons with brass knucks, leading to a tag title change. How ridiculous that in a promotion that includes the Steiners, Arn & Barry, Doom, and even Morton & Rich, that the Freebirds get booked to hold the belts for any length of time. Simmons is beaten down by the knucks more afterward at Long's behest. There was build, but this split still comes off as rushed--Doom still had a lot to offer to the tag division and there was still mileage in another Doom/Steiners program as well. I can admittedly see the logic in getting behind Simmons as a singles babyface, as the crowd is way into his big spinebuster and powerslam and he has more to offer in the future than Reed would.

 

After all this we get a 12-year old sweepstakes winner whose favorite wrestlers are...Doom. This is some Office levels of awkwardness here, folks.

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Quality entrance by Fabulous Freebirds/DDP and the Diamond Dolls. DDP introduces another member of the group. I couldn't figure out that was Humperink until reading the comments. Doom don’t look like they are on the same page. Homey don’t play that. Shout out to In Living Color. Reed hits Simmons in error causing the title change. Freebirds don’t seem like the right team at this point to put tag titles on. Official break up of Doom.

 

Ross interviews a fan about his favorite tag team in War Games which is Doom. Oops.

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Freebirds are at 1997 levels of NWO oversaturation.

 

Doom is no more and Chad is saddened. I don't know why they decided to be done with this team. I know Dusty liked simmons but they still had a lot more potential.

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DDP as a mixture of Little Richard and Superstar Billy Graham introduces Sir Oliver Humperdink as the Birds' new manager, only JR and Dusty never tell us that it's actually Sir Oliver. Not even an "Oh, my gosh! That's Sir Oliver Humperdink!" If he's a big enough star to have his own entrance, he's a big enough star to have his past acknowledged at least once. The problems between Doom are mentioned, but as far as I know, we've only had the one brief interview on The Danger Zone where there was even a hint of a problem in the first place. If there was more build, why didn't it make the set?

 

After seeing the finish, I guess I know why the Birds were booked to win the titles. That was such a fluky, out-of-nowhere win by a team that no one thought even deserved a shot that it was bound to lead to major problems with Simmons, Reed, and Long. But I would have preferred them to somehow escape by the skin of their teeth and then drop the belts to the Steiners a couple of weeks later, as we saw the Birds do. It just seems like a total waste for a team as low on the food chain as Hayes and Garvin now are to all of a sudden be elevated like this just to continue an angle than never went much of anywhere anyway.

 

JR handled that contest winner about as well as he could under the circumstances, although he clearly asked the kid who his favorite team was in the WarGames. I guess the kid was nervous and didn't hear the last part. To JR's credit, he not only didn't lapse into embarrassed silence, he further put over what we'd just seen. That's the mark of a true broadcast professional.

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