1994-01-29-SMW-TV

[GSR]

Smoky Mountain Wrestling

TV

Aired January 29, 1994

Chihowie High School, Chihowie, VA

1. INT: Louie Spicolli - says he’s come all the way from California as Chris Candido wouldn’t come out and give him a title shot, so he had to come to Smoky Mountain to get one.
2. Chris Candido vs Louie Spicolli - Tammy Fytch again comes down to ringside once the match is underway.
3. INT: Dennis Coraluzzo - he’s at the Hall of Records in Pennsylvania to prove that Chris Candido is correct in what he’s been saying all along, and that Tracey Smothers is really Vito Maranara from Schuylkill Haven, PA.  His ‘associate,’ Vinny, shows up and hands Coraluzzo something, purportedly to be Smothers’ birth certificate to prove that he’s not from Tennessee in the slightest.  Vinny asks for his payment and we bear witness to some of the worst acting you could imagine from Coraluzzo when Vinny tells him that its $50 he owes him.  Coraluzzo struggles to get together $50 and tries to use his watch as collateral to help pay him.  A policeman’s whistle blows, Vinny does a runner and Coraluzzo tells the officers which direction he went.  This was an awful segment with dreadful acting from all involved and a terrible storyline.  The Candido - Smothers feud doesn’t need this nonsense at all, especially as they have been trying to turn Candido into a more serious heel as opposed to a jokey one.
4. INT: Jim Cornette - says he’s been waiting a long time for this Texas Death match at Sunday Bloody Sunday between Terry Funk and The Bullet, otherwise known as Bob Armstrong, and there’s a lot riding on it, but instead of him telling everyone about it he’s got some comments from Terry Funk.  Funk has his brother Dory with him (and he’s wearing a rather dashing gold top hat) and says how he’s coming to Knoxville to wrestle Bob Armstrong in a Texas Death match.  He asks Dory to explain the rules to everyone and he tells them that falls don’t count there could be one or one hundred, there’s no stopping the match for any reason, falls can take place anywhere, and most importantly there is no stopping the match for blood.  If the people don’t like blood he suggests they don’t look towards the ring as Bob Armstrong’s blood will be splattered all over Knoxville.   The last man standing will be the winner and that’s going to be his brother, the King of the Texas Death match.  Dory will be at ringside for the match, not to interfere, but to protect Jim Cornette from all of Bob Armstrong’s illegitimate relatives.  Terry says that he knows all about Knoxville as on a windy day he can smell it from Texas.  It smells like butt crack, Tennessee and it smells like fear.  What kind of fear does it smell like?  It smells like death.  Is it Bob Armstrong shaking under his covers because the Funks are coming?  He and his brother have a date in Knoxville.  Cornette is laughing and very happy in the studio, Terry Funk is the King of the Texas Death match, he’s had a million of them and knows all the ins and outs.  Bob Caudle wants to hear from The Bullet though and they go to a video interview from him.  The Bullet says that since he signed this contract to wrestle Terry Funk in a Texas Death match everybody has been calling him saying that he’s made a mistake, the man’s never been beaten.  Although he’s beaten Bob Armstrong he’s not beaten The Bullet.  Jim Cornette has bought in some big guns but somehow he’s found a way around them and he’s still here, fighting for Bob Armstrong’s spot as Commissioner.  He knows he’s going to run out of body parts before Jim Cornette’s mama runs out of money, so let’s get it all done in on night, once and for all.  Back in the studio and Cornette says that he’s waited a long time and is going to make the most of this.  He knows he can’t hurt Bob Armstrong or injure him so bad that he won’t want to come back, he’s tried; but how do you harm a prideful man?  “You hit him in his pride.”  All the people who have supported him for 25 years, all his family, friends and fans will watch him kiss the feet of Jim Cornette and if he wants to get out of doing that, he must beat Terry Funk in a Texas Death match, and that’s something that no man can do.  Great stuff on the mic as always when these guys are involved.
5. INT: Rock & Roll Express, Tony Anthony & Dirty White Girl
6. Recap of Bruise Brothers and Moondogs backstage brawl from Christmas Chaos
7. Down & Dirty w/ Jim Cornette & Heavenly Bodies - Dutch has a special interview that he wants to share from two guys who think they’re real great, who think they were great football player and who now think they’re great wrestlers, Doug & Mike Furnas.  The Furnas Brothers have a University of Alabama sweater with them which they both spit on before saying there is no way they’re going to wear that come 2/13.  They’re going straight after the football helmet and plan to knock some heads together with it.  Back on Down & Dirty and Cornette has a very important announcement.  The Rock & Roll Express are trying to kill him for no apparent reason so he has gone and got an injunction against them.  If the Rock & Roll Express attack him, or even lay one finger on him outside of a sanctioned match, then they will both be suspended indefinitely.  He couldn’t do anything about what happens in the course of a match, but they can’t disrupt any more of their interviews or anything that he does over at the announcing desk.  Cornette then goes off on Paul Morton and Ricky Morton runs down to the ring.  He is followed by Robert Gibson, Tracey Smothers and Bobby Blaze who hold him back while the Bodies and Cornette try to goad him into the ring to attack Cornette.
8. Rock & Roll Express vs Jason Herd & Jason West
9. INT: Rock & Roll Express - Ricky Morton says he doesn’t care about the injunction because they’ve already got matches signed against the Heavenly Bodies.  He’s sick and tired of him putting down all these fans, putting down his family and they’re going to go through the Heavenly Bodies and get to him, he can bet on it.
10. INT: Brian Lee & Tammy Fytch - Tammy cannot believe this is happening!  Not only do they have a Chain match with the Dirty White Boy, but Ron Wright is coming back and they crippled him.  It’s not fair.  Brian’s a wrestler, he should have a wrestling match not one of these barbaric chain matches.  She’s going to get blood all over her clothes and doesn’t know what to do.  Lee interrupts and wonders why she’s worried about her clothes?  It’s his blood, he may get killed in this match!  Fytch says it’s not her fault, Lee says its somebodies fault and he’s going to put all the blame on the Dirty White Boy.  He’s going to take him out before 2/13 so he doesn’t make it to Sunday Bloody Sunday and the Chain match.
11. Tony Anthony (w/ Dirty White Girl) vs Killer Kyle - Brian Lee interferes for the DQ and Tammy Fytch takes out the Dirty White Girl with her purse.  With Anthony holding his own against the two of them, Chris Candido runs out, picks up Kyle’s violin case and nails the White Boy in the back with it.  Tracey Smothers makes the save but gets double teamed by Kyle and Candido for his trouble.  The White Boy regains his senses, grabs his chain and the two of them quickly get out of the ring.  It leaves Brian Lee all alone and Anthony chokes him with the chain before hanging him (to riotous applause from the crowd).  The heels finally get Primetime free and retreat to the back.
12. INT: Tammy Fytch, Jim Cornette
13. INT: Tony Anthony & Dirty White Girl & Tracey Smothers - the White Girl warns that little street walking tramp that when she gets her hands on her there’ll be hell to pay.  Smothers says that as bad as they hate each other they hate Brian Lee, Chris Candido and Tammy Fytch more, and gives the Dirty White Boy his word that he’s got a partner that he can trust and they’ll kick their butts once and for all.  The White Boy says he’s looking forward to 2/13 as he’s got a Chain match and Ron Wright is going to walk down that aisle with him.  Ron Wright has never lost a Chain match in his life so there is no way he’s going to lose in front of him, and what happened to Brian Lee just now is a small taste of what he can expect at Sunday Bloody Sunday. 

Bold matches are PWO recommended