1994-04-09-SMW-TV

[GSR]

Smoky Mountain Wrestling

TV

Aired April 9, 1994

1. The Thrillseekers vs The Hornet & Mike Sampson - Well Dunn joint them on commentary for this match
2. The Thrillseekers music video - Bon Jovi ‘Sleep When I’m Dead’ (the video emphasises that Jericho is this party animal while Lance would rather be tucked up in his bed.  Jericho comes across as a right irritant here.  The two of them are about to have a beer when they remember the cameras are on them and get two milks instead.  Jericho gets slapped across the face by a woman, they get kicked out of a bar and Lance ends up falling asleep in another.  Pretty funny overall although some of the acting left a lot to be desired.
3. Handicap Match: Bob Armstrong vs Bruiser Bedlam & Jim Cornette (jip, from Bluegrass Brawl) - Bedlam gets the pin on Armstrong following a double axe handle off the top while Bob is occupied with Cornette.  They beat on The Bullet after the match and Bedlam uses a stomach claw on him until Tracey Smothers and Lance Storm make the save.
4. INT:  Bob Armstrong - he’s got to hand it to Jim Cornette, he got the job done and this man Bruiser Bedlam is like a rock.  He got banged up, beat up, but isn’t going to give up and if he thinks he’s just going to roll over because he got the devil beat out of him he can think again.  Every man has a weekness and looking at Bruiser Bedlam he’s going to have to study a long time to find it, but he will find it.
5. INT:  Jim Cornette & Bruiser Bedlam - dressing room interview. Cornette is laughing as ‘The Bruiser’ is here!  How did he find Bruiser Bedlam?  Last August he was in Detroit, MI for Summerslam in his hotel room when the phone rang, he picked it up and a voice at the other end said “Jim Cornette, I want to become a wrestler.  I’m big, bad, mean and tough and I like to beat people up.”  He was a bit dismissive having heard that so often in the past, but the voice said that he’s in the lobby, just come on down and see what you think.  He wanted a laugh so went down to the lobby, but when the door opened what was standing in front of him was as big as a house, strong as an ox and twice as smart.  He went over and asked him his name to which he replied “Johnny Bedlam, but my friends call me Bruiser.  All I like to do is beat people up and I want to do it for a living.”  He kept him back, kept him in hiding waiting for the right moment and that right moment came when he needed to get rid of Bob Armstrong.  The Bruiser says that he gets paid to beat them, he’s the baddest and he’ll fight anyone!  Cornette is laughing and says that the word bedlam means chaos, pandemonium, a scene of wild mad uproar, and that’s exactly what this man causes ‘bedlam’.  Remember the name Bruiser Bedlam because Bob Armstrong sure will.  Bedlam looks like an absolute nut job, which it transpires he is, although it’s a shame there appears to be no sign of the Cornette - Armstrong feud going away just yet.  If Cornette had him in hiding since Summerslam, why then didn’t he use him instead of the ‘secret weapon’ or why was he paying all this money for hired guns like Terry Funk and Dick Murdoch?  There are usually very little holes in SMW booking and storylines, but this is just another example of this feud being tired, played out and beyond stale.
6. Recap of Peggy Lee Leather jumping the Dirty White Girl from last week’s Down & Dirty
7. INT: Dirty White Girl - says the last time she met up with Tammy Fytch she had to go and hire some big moose who drinks beer in a bar to jump her from behind.  Next time it’s going to be a little different as she knows she’s coming and will be there to meet her face to face.
8. INT: Tammy Fytch & Peggy Lee Leather - Fytch says that the ‘Ladies Showdown’ is coming up and the Dirty White Girl wanted her singles match and now she’s got it.  She doesn’t even understand why they are calling this the ‘Ladies Showdown’ as the Dirty White Girl certainly isn’t a lady and Peggy Lee Leather isn’t much of a lady either; she brawls, she cusses, she even drinks beer!  She’s the greatest and Peggy Lee is going to break the Dirty White Girl in half.  Peggy says she’s glad that Tammy gave her a call as she likes to hurt people and makes a career out of going all over the world and annihilating people like the Dirty White Girl.  When they get in the ring she’s going to squash her like a gnat, then she and Tammy are going to go out and drink some beer. Tammy is wonderful here.
9. Down & Dirty w/ Daryl Van Horn & Prince Kharis - Van Horn says that Prince Kharis is finally getting his due and getting a SMW championship match with the Dirty White Boy.  They’ve bought in more Nubian virgins and manservants to make sure the Prince is comfortable for the match.  He says how the White Boy seems to think he can do the impossible, do what no-one else has done, and defeat Prince Kharis.  Well he can’t be hurt and when he gets done with the Dirty White Boy he’ll be turning tricks for some chicken hawk on the streets of San Francisco, while the Dirty White Girl will go back to her old job as a primary testing subject for the Monstat Corporation.  There are people who don’t believe that Prince Kharis is who he says he is, so for the non-believers and to prove he can’t be hurt, he cuts off Prince Kharis’ thumb and sand pours out!  Tony Anthony joins them in the ring with the White Boy mocking Van Horn’s chanting.  He tells him who does he think he’s trying to fool around here?  Trying to get people to believe that this big piece of toilet paper is 3,000 years old.  He’s not buying it and he specializes in big men so is not worried about him, before flicking Van Horn’s fez off his head.  Kharis goes after the White Boy (rather comically), but he misses and the White Boy unloads with rights knocking him off his feet.  Van Horn then throws some sand in the White Boy’s eyes temporarily blinding him.  Kharis sits up like he’s the Undertaker, turns his arm and clobbers the Dirty White Boy with it.  He then puts Anthony in the cobra clutch until Bobby Blaze, Tracey Smothers and Tim Horner make the save and rescue him.
10. Mike Furnas vs Larry Santo
11. INT: Brian Lee & Chris Candido - Tammy is really, really disgusted!  She can’t believe what Ricky Morton did to her, he kissed her, he grossed her out, but they proved who the best team was (they then replay the end of last week’s match).  She is going to file sexual assault charges because Ricky Morton took her, forcibly kissed her and she could get AIDS or some other disease.  Candido says the reason Morton did that is because he couldn’t even get a date on a tombstone.  Brian Lee and he proved who the greatest tag team in wrestling is when they put the Rock & Roll Express down 1-2-3 and he says Brian is the reason why.  Lee agrees and says that Chris couldn’t have said it better, he’s the man of the team, the big dog and the general.  He tells the Rock & Rolls that anytime they want, they can come down that aisle and get themselves pinned by Mr Candido, Mr Lee and Ms Fytch.  Candido doesn’t care how many time World tag team or Smoky Mountain tag team champions they are, they’re the new legends of professional wrestling.
12. Loser Leaves Town Cage Match: Heavenly Bodies (w/ Jim Cornette) vs Rock & Roll Express (jip, from Bluegrass Brawl)
13. INT: Rock & Roll Express - backstage and they’re being congratulated by Bob Armstrong, Tracey Smothers, Lance Storm and Bobby Blaze.  ‘Bullet’ Bob congratulates them on winning one of the hardest fought matches he’s ever seen and he’s glad to have them representing Smoky Mountain Wrestling again as tag team champions.  Ricky Morton says that throughout his career he’s never been involved in a match as tough and brutal as that one against Jim Cornette’s Heavenly Bodies and he’d like to thank everyone for never giving up on the Rock & Roll Express and supporting them in every town they went to each and every night.  Once again they are the SMW tag team champions, but it never stops as there is a new tag team of Brian Lee & Chris Candido who are coming after these belts.  The titles are not going to sit on the shelf though and they’ll defend them every night like the champions that they are.
14. Brian Matthews is waiting to hear from Jim Cornette and the Heavenly Bodies as they’ve called an emergency meeting with the Board of Directors pleading their case about the ‘Loser Leaves Town’ match that took place at the Bluegrass Brawl.  Cornette and the Bodies exit the meeting with Jimmy Del Ray slamming the door and Cornette elbowing the wall (I don’t think it went well!).  Tom Prichard says that they have been ripped off by the biggest rats in Smoky Mountain Wrestling, the Rock & Roll Express and Bob Armstrong.  The Heavenly Bodies can no longer stay in SMW, it’s not right and is a conspiracy of the first degree.  Cornette says he knew that coming over here to this meeting would be a waste of time, as Bob Armstrong and the Board of Directors have waited for this chance a long time and now they’ve got it.  The decision will stand, the stipulation will stand and the Bodies are out of here.  Everyone always asks him why he hates the Rock & Roll Express and why he’s been so obsessed with them?  For ten long years, all across the country, in every major wrestling promotion, he’s done everything he can to send his teams after them and get them out of professional wrestling.  He hates them because he’s devoted his life to this sport, he wanted to be the best, wanted to manage the best and every team he has managed has been the best.  Dennis Condrey & Bobby Eaton, Bobby Eaton & Stan Lane, Stan Lane & Tom Prichard, Tom Prichard & Jimmy Del Ray, they’ve been the best, they’ve been without parallel, nobody can touch them, nobody can stop them, except the Rock & Roll Express.  Every time that he got a team that was ready to take the top, the Rock & Rolls were there to take the titles, take the glory, take the attention, to make sure all the fans could come up to him and say your guys are pretty good but the Rock & Rolls are better.  He’s done all he can to try and run Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson out of wrestling, they’ve had to endure it all and they never got that last measure of revenge, until now.  The Bodies are finished in Smoky Mountain Wrestling and the decision stands.  This isn’t the only place they can wrestle, this isn’t the only place they do wrestle, but it’s the only place that they wanted to wrestle because they dominated Smoky Mountain Wrestling, they established Smoky Mountain Wrestling and if it wasn’t for the Heavenly Bodies there wouldn’t be a Smoky Mountain Wrestling.  Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson ruined that, they got their final revenge, after ten years this thing is over and they got what they wanted.  Cornette swears that there will be another day, he doesn’t know where and doesn’t know when, but there will be another day between them and the Rock & Roll Express.  For the time being you’ve seen the last of Tom Prichard and Jimmy Del Ray and he’s seriously thinking about going with them.  Bob Seger’s ‘Famous Final Scene’ starts to play as the Bodies put on their jackets, hug Cornette, collect their bags and walk down the corridor.  They take one final look back and then continue down that corridor and out of Smoky Mountain Wrestling.  The whole presentation of this was awesome.  From Cornette’s killer promo, to the ‘Famous Final Scene’, to the last look back and then walking down that corridor.  I know they eventually come back, but thank you Heavenly Bodies, it won’t be the same without you.

Bold matches are PWO recommended