PeteF3

This is a really good match, that gets a lot better once they're back in the ring. I didn't see it as great, though. The garbage brawling works because Sullivan/Benoit notwithstanding it feels fresh in a WCW setting, but there are a lot better through-the-crowd brawls in American wrestling around this time. Once we get back in the ring, we get a really well-laid-out match with Liz and Kimberly being used perfectly, some great teases and cut-offs of the Diamond Cutter, and a mostly satisfying ending. Now, Savage was always an unhinged guy, but he comes off as particularly dim for piledriving Mark Curtis (though it was a great spot, and his earlier bullying of Buffer and Penzer were great too) and then immediately expecting a count. Nick Patrick makes the 3-count after DDP hits him with the Diamond Cutter, giving Page the biggest win of his life. Nick takes an INCREDIBLE bump off the Jackknife from Nash afterward, then we tease dissension between Savage and Bischoff as Eric prevents Savage from clobbering Kimberly. Good, intense post-match angle that I don't think leads much of anywhere, sadly.

Most prescient comment in the history of PWO, right here. This was such a ridiculously goofy premise, the idea of Harlem Heat wrestling in a four-way singles match for a World title shot. Of course the reason for this segment's inclusion becomes self-evident. I agree Okerlund wasn't even paying attention, but Sherri and Booker's reactions are hilarious. Sherri trying to comfort Book while staying in character was kind of sweet in a way.

Funk cuts right through all the meandering bullshit: "Hello, asshole." Now this is a promo I can get behind. Raven insists that Funk won't goad him into a fight before losing his mind and screaming a bunch of stuff that gets bleeped and slamming himself against the lockers. Fuck everyone else here, I liked this as an illustration of the contrast between the two characters and two generations, and the show-closing brawl was just fine. Apparently I'm liking early '97 ECW more than anyone else.

Raven's promo on Stevie is actually pretty good. Then he gets to Terry Funk and goes off on a weird tangent about the Jesus footprints in the desert story then talks about "carrying" Funk to a great match. A little off the mark, but still working to hype the match. And *then* we go fully off the rails as we get to Raven's father. It's not often that you say this, but WCW's addition to the character of making him a spoiled rich boy growing up was a major improvement to his character and something that should have been touched on here. We close out with a reciting of "1979" by the Smashing Pumpkins.

Has anyone ever seen blonde Stacy Carter and Boni Blackstone in the same place at the same time? Diesel and Razor are sort of shooting on their predicaments here. Jacobs: "I feel like we're being punished here ... we're stuck here in Memphis while the rest of the WWF is off in South Africa." Bogner: "Hey, mang--nothing realer than us."

I'm one of those "not for everyone" types that Chad alludes to--though this was unquestionably better than the meandering, boring UWF '80s draws, with insane crowd heat and action that really picked up after the first cut stoppage. The welts on the faces are just nasty, and adds to the past-midnight feel of the match as it looks like both guys should have been out at around the 18-minute mark.

Liz has finally clued Savage in on his rival's name. Savage declares that DDP has no family jewels at all. DDP responds with a good Savage impersonation and a good line about the Lady and the Tramp. I like how Savage works as a traditional heel, in contrast to Hall & Nash who tend to no-sell everything the babyfaces say. Here he puts over Page as getting the best of this particular exchange.

Rocky is still pretty raw here (no pun intended), but it's interesting to watch him work a completely different style. Bret clamps on the ringpost figure four and won't let go, drawing a disqualification. Austin is out to save, triggering a brawl with the newly formed Hart Foundation. A very promising episode of Raw, though there would be better wild brawls in the weeks to come.

Bailey/Sasha had cool moves and the favorite won, but in no way would I call it a spotfest, and it was easily the most well-liked match of last night's show.

Great promo by Austin, who takes Shawn Michaels' template after his Survivor Series loss but perfects it--coming off as an angry loner rather than a whiner like HBK. Bret's rebuttal is almost as good, quietly confident after dispatching Austin at WM. Austin threatens to bury Bret underground and pay him back tenfold for the bloody mess at WM. For two guys talking to each other this was a super-hot segment.

Mankind finally has something to do again after being lost in the wilderness since November.

I forgot that they gave us a full-blown match before the big angle--and a hell of a match it is too, with a totally different dynamic than the Japan-style tournament final. This is total babyface vs. heel, with Bulldog taking some really sick bumps and Owen leveling him with some great offense. Just as things are on the verge of breaking down totally, here comes Bret to break things up. All the awesome things about Bret's promo and Owen's reaction have already been talked about, but Vince's quiet, "I have to question the motives..." really adds to this as well. I love the implication that Bret is really doing this just for his own selfish reasons. Subtlety in the WWF--who'da thunk?

The full version really adds to this as I thought the clipped version telegraphed the draw, whereas the hot start of the full version leads you to think they'll pull the trigger on a Kawada win. Definitely the better of the 2 Carny matches--they have elements of the "evenly matched" psychology pulled off so well in the '92 CC match between Kawada and Taue, but Toshiaki gets a few long stretches of offense both early and late to put him over, and by the end Misawa really seems to be on the ropes with Kawada having answers for most of his moves. Not a standout match in the rivalry but definitely an excellent bout in its own right.

The crying spot jumped out at me, too. But that was a minor quibble in the midst of a pretty hot finishing stretch. Both guys get some heart-stopping near-falls on the other before Kobashi finally asserts himself.

Yeah, I'm a little foggy on why Sabu had to keep his word for so long not to wrestle Taz. But this was an effective and LONG build, to the point where I don't know if the match can possibly live up to the hype. Taz repeats himself a little here but cuts another quietly intense promo. In addition to the stop-start push, Taz in the WWF was sunk by the Radicalz falling into the company's lap a week after his debut.

Another fiery promo from Funk, hyping up that this is his last shot at a World title while also putting over Sandman and Stevie. I don't think the words "Barely Legal" have been uttered on television once--it's only being referred to as "the pay-per-view."

They wanted to do a mystery-man angle for whatever reason, but as soon as Rude opened his mouth everyone in the Arena recognized him. But they're sticking with the mask anyway. Rude makes an innuendo-laden invitation to Francine: "Will you go with Shane, or will you come with me?"

Basically a nothing match, though I remain surprised they didn't just put the TV belt on Savage for the hell of it. Iaukea has some physical gifts but has no presence or charisma, and it seems like there were plenty of better options for the underdog champion role. DDP saves the title but gets beaten down, still an island unto himself at this point. Iaukea gets the standard "NWO" spraypaint treatment while Page gets a big "0" from Savage.

Has the makings of a good vignette, and the budget is better than the Desperados stuff. But yeah. This would have worked better before WarGames.

Just as a heads up: you may actually want to do Beach Blast before you do the tag tournament Clash. The Clash was taped before Beach Blast but aired afterward--the only tape-delayed Clash in history, I believe.

Maybe my favorite promo ever, as Bret lays his entire October-to-present story on the line, and finds a way to indict the entire American wrestling audience on top of all the WWF wrestlers and officials conspiring against him. Shawn Michaels cuts one of the most delusional babyface promos all-time--"I have tried and tried to take the high road..." "I'm not OBSESSED with being number one..." "I don't get bent out of shape when they boo me..."--each statement more eye-rolling than the one before it. But even with the insider-y cheap shots, the venom coming from both guys feels real (because it is, of course). Bret declines to face off with Shawn then and there, but then cheap-shots him from behind and clamps on the ringpost figure four. A week after maybe the best segment in Raw history, they may have just topped it. A very incidental bit: notice how Jerry Lawler, the man who's hated Bret more than anyone over the past 4 years, starts gradually seeing things Bret's way as the segment goes on. At first he's shitting on him, then about halfway through the promo he admits, "He's telling the truth, McMahon." By the end of the segment, he's declaring that Bret accomplished what he set out to do and placing blame on Shawn Michaels. Vince, after the break: "Somehow he thinks this is what America deserves--that it's the era of the antihero of some kind. Bret Hart, ladies and gentlemen, is a confused man. And it's a tragedy." One of the deeper bits of commentary in Vince's career--this storyline really *was* a tragedy in the literary sense of the word.

The climax to the long-simmering tension between Owen and the Bulldog. This was originally going to lead to Bulldog vs. Austin at WrestleMania. Bulldog shoves the referee while arguing with Owen, and after the DQ the two come to blows. Owen demands another European title shot, and Bulldog says he'll get one and only one title shot.

These guys really do try hard to have a good match. They don't get there, but the action down the stretch isn't that bad, and they threw a few curveballs at us like Sid busting out a tombstone reversal spot. Bret interferes liberally as Shawn whines about how much Bret whines. Undertaker wins to start his first "real" WWF title reign, and yes, this whole program seemed like an afterthought in the face of the Submission Match and the Bret/Shawn drama. At least they had a plan and a direction for his reign. Shawn: "He can't stand that the spotlight's not on him!" Lawler, practically under his breath: "Boy, if that isn't the pot calling the kettle black..."

Bret eviscerates that little faker Shawn, Undertaker, and then Sid. Sid finally drops Bret with a power bomb as Shawn cackles.

I don't know if it was a good idea to have this immediately follow the submission match, which featured more hatred and more intense brawling. There are some neat spots here--a few good weapons shots, and Ahmed doing a somersault over the guardrail onto Crush. Also, I had no recollection of Clarence Mason actually taking a bump here, and didn't know that that ever happened. I also can't believe more wasn't made out of the NOD using a noose on Ahmed. I think I liked this more than anyone here--no, it's not great, and it doesn't compare to the best Nasty Boys brawls much less the best ECW brawls. But it was energetic and I wasn't bored, the partisan Chicago crowd loved LOD, and Ahmed looked downright good at points. PG-13 take two tremendous bumps off a double Doomsday Device afterward.