Hello all and thank you for having me on your forum.
I thought I would jot down my own criteria for what makes the greatest wrestler ever, mainly to hold myself to account with a strict, at least partly quantifiable rubric. But as all of us fans of pro wrestling know, sometimes there’s just a magic that can’t be quantified.
In any case, here are five points I will be considered when ranking my greatest wrestler ever.
1. Look/Presence
The first criteria is the one that is most immediately apparent. The airport test. The look. The aura. The presence. Wrestlers, of course, may not have a lot of control over their gimmick. They may not be able to choose what they wear. They may not be able to choose how tall they are, or how much hair they can grow. But they do have a choice in how they look. The Shockmaster may have been a shit gimmick, but Lex Luger would have looked a hell of a lot better under that bedazzled Stormtrooper helmet than Fred Ottman.
But it is not all about muscles, rips and tears and striations and vascularity. Your presence and body language is just as important in the ring. Tajiri has always had a pretty unimpressive physique, and I would characterize his ring gear as “fancy trash bag pants”. But the way he moved in the ring made him seem quick, sudden, lethal. How many times have bookers tried to replicate Goldberg, and how many have failed because they lacked his physical charisma?
The greatest wrestler of all time will have a great look and presence.
2. In-ring ability
I characterize this as everything a wrestler does from bell-to-bell. It means the spots, it means the moves, it means the worked punches, it means the selling, the bumping, the flips, the dives, the flops and the finishes.
But it also measures how good someone is at the art of professional wrestling. The art of the blade job, of the hot tag, the bump and feed. How quickly a match can be re-called on the fly to win a crowd back, or settle them down for a long haul. How good is someone at getting their opponent over, of getting an angle over, of being unselfish, or being incredibly selfish when the time demands.
It also measures how safe a wrestler is. Wrestling is a work. It’s kayfabe. It is fake and gay. Hurting your opponent is the opposite of what you’re supposed to do, and in my mind, an unsafe worker could never be the greatest wrestler of all time.
3. Promo
If I wanted to watch amateur wrestling, I would. But I want great promos. I want great angles. I want to believe, and it’s still real to me damn it. This measures how good someone is at cutting promos, of selling me on a match. Of giving interviews, of controlling a live audience. This is an incredibly important aspect of being a wrestler.
There’s an obvious barrier in that I do not speak Spanish and I do not speak Japanese. But human connection more often than not transcends the language barrier. I don’t need to speak Japanese to hear the crowd’s adoration for Naito and their indifference to Shota Umino. I can hear it clear as day. Some international promotions do not have as many promos as North American companies. But then, some wrestlers do not have as many matches available on tape. It’s all a balancing act. But the greatest wrestler of all time will be a great promo.
4. Versatility
I believe William Regal was the first person I ever heard refer to what he did as his “act”. But it’s a perfect description. Every wrestler has an act, like a vaudeville show. The five moves of doom. The classic NWA Flair match. The PWG Superkick party. All instantly recognisable acts.
It is my belief that in order to be a truly great wrestler, you must be versatile enough to perform several different acts. Babyface and heel. Traditional pro wrestling and hardcore. Singles and tag-team. There are exceptions. Ricky Steamboat only really ever had one act, the babyface, he just happened to be perhaps the greatest babyface of all time.
But the true greats push themselves outside their comfort zones, work opponents and matches and crowds and buildings and stipulations and time limits of all shapes and sizes. The greatest wrestler of all time is versatile.
5. Impact and influence
This criteria is my most tenuous, but I believe important all the same. How much impact has a wrestler been on the art or the business of professional wrestling? Truly great artists are copied, satirized, mocked, aped, revered, discussed ad nauseum. Why should pro wrestling be any different?
This will, as a matter of course, be slanted towards older wrestlers who have the benefit of time. Who knows if someone like Jungle Boy Jack Perry will go on to be influential to generations of fans? (He won’t). But there are wrestlers we know for certain that have already been canonized as incredibly influential on the pro wrestling business.
Shawn Michaels is a wrestler that has been both lauded and torn to shreds by different parts of the wrestling community. But I don’t think anyone can deny the influence he had on the next generation of wrestlers. From high spots to match structure, a portion of the generation of wrestlers after him emulated him as a high watermark for the professional wrestling they wanted to achieve. Whether the outcome was for better or for worse remains to be argued. But I believe the greatest wrestler of all time must be influential.
In summing up, I only note that you should not give a single fuck about my criteria. They are mine, and mine alone. I certainly don’t care about your criteria, and that’s exactly as it should be. It’s the beauty of discussions like this, and I can’t wait to discuss it all with you over the coming period.
