[1998-05-22-CMLL] The Headhunters & Brazo de Plata vs Gran Markus Jr & Cien Caras & The Steele

[Jetlag]

Brazo de Plata, baby. This is not a match people would seek out on paper. Well, if YOU would seek this match out on paper, then I want to shake your hand and call you friend. If YOU, as a wrestling fan, can't get excited about a violent brawl with this many fat guys in it, shame on you. Or shame on me. Porky and Markus Jr. are killing eachother and it's awesome. Steele is a canadian guy with abs who has a solid enough punch and a funny bump over the top rope to entertain, and he gets slapped around plenty by Headhunter. He tries to speak spanish, and just gets walloped in the mouth. Still, you want this for the awesome Markus Jr. punch combos, blood, biting, Plata's fat guy fire and dive and general porky asskicking going on. Shit finish, but they were setting up an apuestas, baby.

[KB8]

You knew you were in for something special before this even officially started. The Headhunters are full blown tecnicos here and come out hugging children and high-fiving parents, then Brazo de Plato comes out at a rapid waddle and bum rushes the EVEN PORTLIER Gran Markus Jr. as the Loony Tunes theme song plays. You'd maybe think the match could only go downhill from there, but then you'd be dead fucking wrong because this was an awesome seedy brawl built around a couple fatboys bleeding like pigs. The first caida lasts about a minute and a half before the rudos literally kick Porky into submission. Or the refs DQ them for excessive cruelty, I'm not really sure. Either way Porky gets thrown into the ring post and bleeds, so Markus Jr. punches him in the cut and hungrily laps up his blood like a disgusting wee ghoul. Porky making his comeback was of course phenomenal, as it tends to be. I'll never tire of Super Porky losing his marbles in fit of rage and it looked like he was trying to kick Markus Jr. to death. He was also measuring his punches before landing potato shots right to the cheek bone and digging his thumbs into the cut forehead like he was trying to peel a particularly stubborn tangerine. The Headhunters were a blast in this as well, throwing their ample weight around and splatting guys with beefy clotheslines, one of them crushing Cien Caras with his entire body weight, the other doing an awesome fatboy plancha off the ring apron. Steele is Val Venis in a dodgy Shredder mask made of cut up cereal boxes and he was a pretty fun rudo stooge. He had a couple impressive power spots, like picking up a Headhunter and ramming him into the post, and he had a nice brawling section with that same Headhunter where he tried to cut a mid-match promo only to get his face smashed into a table. The finish is deflating as we finally get to the mano a mano section with Porky and Markus Jr. on level footing, but the ref' sold the almighty hell out of that splash and if the apuestas lives up to the lead in then you can accept the trade off.