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garretta

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Everything posted by garretta

  1. garretta
    I should have remembered that. Thanks, Tim!
  2. garretta
    As has been happening more and more often lately, I disagree with just about everything said here. First of all, I hated the finish; it took a great match and flushed it straight down the toilet. I like "exhibition" matches less and less as time goes on, and that's what the double countout made this into. I'd rather see an average match, or even a sloppy match, that comes to some kind of definitive decision that moves things forward. If they weren't willing to have one team take a loss, they shouldn't have booked the match. I'm not specifying a pinfall, but one of the Harts should have beaten the count back in, which would have given them a win over the former tag champions and momentum going into the Rumble, at least in real time. Rick and Scotty weren't doing much in the WWF by now, so why not order them to put the Harts over? Let them go back to Japan for good if they don't like it. Second, Bret looked great here, especially against Scotty. It was Owen ​who seemed out of place to me. Gino said it best (if not quite in these words): he's too damn small to be in there with two bruisers like the Steiners. I realize there weren't a whole bunch of other options when it came to a partner for Bret, but that doesn't change the facts of the case. I especially liked the opening few minutes, and Bret-Scotty would have been a hell of a singles feud if things had played out differently. Third, there weren't enough tags for my taste. Each of the four individual matchups had its moments, but there wasn't really the teamwork I thought there would have been. Another crisply executed doubleteam or two would have turned things up a notch or two, although this match was still plenty hot until they all went outside for the lousy finish. I thought the Harts' use of the backbreaker/elbow from the second rope was a hell of a nice callback to the original Foundation, and I wish we'd seen at least one more spot like it. Fourth, Gino's had some shaky performances lately, but this wasn't one of them. I thought he really emphasized the toughness of all four guys when he said submissions wouldn't work, meaning that you'd have to knock one of these guys totally unconscious to beat them because they'd rather be injured than quit. Maybe bringing up Owen's low body weight didn't put him over, but as I said earlier, he should never have been in this match to begin with for just that reason, no matter how athletic he is. I actually thought Gino and Stan's points about amateur wrestling were quite germane, considering that both teams pride themselves on their technical knowledge. And of course, there was the Heenanesque attack on Patterson to top things off. After hearing Tony ignore two perfectly fine Austin matches this month just to put over the idea of Robert "Boss Hogg" Fuller in a lousy goddamn chicken suit, I thought Gino was a breath of fresh air. Fifth, I'm no cheering fan of Stan's yet, but he could become something with more time. He still sounds a bit cookie-cutter, but he definitely has a ton of knowledge, which actually could work against him considering what company we're talking about. He'd have been a damn sight better than Teddy was at the Rumble, that's for sure. I hope to hear more of him as the year goes on. Sixth and last, that screwdriver piledriver from Scotty looks like it could break a neck in a jiffy. Let's hope guys figure out how to take the bump properly.
  3. garretta
    I decided to "sacrifice" this match, as it were, by listening to the commentary, much like I did with a match on the '91 set involving Jushin Liger and Brian Pillman. Instead of analyzing the match itself (since at least the Mania X ladder match will be on the set), I decided to imagine that I was sitting next to the guys filming the match and see if the things they talked about added to my experience or detracted from it. At least, that was my intent. But it soon became apparent to me that these two numbskulls had no interest whatsoever in the match before them (which was excellent, especially for a house show match), and were probably tanked to the gills and/or higher than kites to boot. What little wrestling talk there was surrounded a bizarre fantasy scenario in which Hall and Michaels were actually fighting this match as tag team partners going for the nonexistent WWF Intercontinental tag team championship. That's about all I feel comfortable sharing; the rest was either unintelligible, stupid, or scatological. These are the type of fans who make wrestlers wish they'd chosen another profession, one which they could have worked in without a crowd. On behalf of those of us who are at least somewhat sane, I offer a sincere apology to any wrestlers who may be reading this. While we may not always like everything you do, the vast majority of us respect you as athletes and performers. It's a shame that we're lumped in with idiots like these, and that bringing a match like this to a wider public also entails giving them a platform for their drivel.
  4. garretta
    A lot of what I wanted to say has already been taken, which is nothing new. The match was good, but it really didn't matter in the grand scheme; this was all about Owen's turn, and while it should ​have been a great moment, it really wasn't. The "all you had to do was tag" stuff was badly set up, mostly because Bret was nowhere near their corner at any point after he was thrown back in. We never saw Owen reach, beg, or anything of the sort. All we saw was Jacques and Pierre work on Bret's knee, and masterfully too. KB recounted some of the spots that they did off of the knee injury, and I'm sort of embarrassed to say that I didn't remember seeing them just a few minutes before. As I'm sitting here, I know why; Vince never tried to sell them as anything important. Sure, he sold the injury, but not the work Jacques and Pierre did to make it worse. To be honest, all the commentary sort of runs together in my head now that I think about it, and for better or worse, you can't say that about Vince too often. At any rate, there was never the definitive moment that Owen could have used to say, "Aha! ​This ​is why Bret's a no-good selfish bastard!" There were no miscommunications which led to an accidental collision (Orndorff and Hogan), no one walked out in the middle of the match (Megapowers), and Bret never allowed their opponents to get a free pin on Owen (Rockers breakup; I'm referring to a singles match between Michaels and Flair from the '91 set). In fact, if you watch the match and see all the times that Owen distracted the ref, it seems at times that Owen was deliberately allowing Bret to take a beating as revenge for all the slights he ever suffered at Bret's hands. That would have been a wonderful story and a great twist............​if ​Vince had thought to sell it that way. If it seems like I'm having trouble crystallizing my thoughts, I am. I just can't grab a hold of this turn for whatever reason. It was so well set up, but the execution wasn't, if you'll pardon the phrase, excellent. I needed to see Owen do something definitive and physical to cement the turn, and not just kick out Bret's leg. I'm talking the sharpshooter, a chair shot, wrapping the bad leg around the post, something. ​As it is, poor little baby Owen just threw another tantrum, that's all. When you boil everything down to its essence, that's all this was: a hissy fit by an immature little jerk. Bret doesn't need to wrestle him at Mania; he needs to turn him (Owen) over his knee and spank him, then stick a pacifier in his mouth, wrap him up in a blanket, and sit him in the corner and make him watch while he (Bret) beats Yoko. I don't doubt that their matches will be great, but I just don't feel the emotion most people seem to about the whole thing. Who the hell booked Ray Rougeau to try and get an interview with Bret as he was being worked on? I've never heard of such a thing, and whoever made the suggestion ought to be fired. Maybe they just wanted Pat Patterson to come off as a tough guy for some reason. Vince was back to being gratingly obnoxious early on, as evidenced by the return of "ONE....TWO.....THREE! HE GOT HIM! WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE DIDN'T? YOU'RE A LOUSY FIBBER!" several times early on when the Harts were in control. He actually got more serious was the match unfolded, and he did well putting over the impact of what happened in terms of what it meant for the Rumble. As for Teddy, he needs to junk the Million Dollar Man character, particularly the laugh. It was effective in promos, but it's ridiculous coming from a commentator. So are all the references to buying titles, paying the price, and any other money-related clichés one can think of. Maybe that's why he became a manager fairly quickly; if he couldn't wrestle anymore, he could at least cut promos the way he was used to and keep up his evil reputation, which he couldn't have done in the booth. Can we please not have any more referee's decisions for a while? We've had two decisions reversed and a controversial stoppage so far this month, and that's about all I can handle. The only thing I want to hear from a WWF ref for at least three months is the sound of his hand hitting the canvas when he's counting pinfalls. I'll bet the Royal Canadian Mounted Police were thrilled to hear, "We're The Mounties" as the Quebecers' theme song. It's a good thing they didn't carry shock sticks like Jacques did in his singles days.
  5. garretta
    This was two matches in one: first, the Quebecers couldn't do beans as a ream that for all we know was a first-time team makes them look like amateurs. Then, Waltman took the pounding of his life, including ​le bomb de Rougeau​, and managed to survive and tag in Jannetty, who cleaned house leading to the Rockerplex and pin. I thought they went too far in making Jacques and Pierre look like schmucks in the first part of the match. They weren't in there with an established team; it was just a random pair of guys whom Levy pissed off last week. It should have been their match to control, with Sean and Marty hitting some occasional spots to keep the crowd involved. At the very least, the timeout should have led to a momentum change. They made up for it once they finally got control; I think it was Jacques who went so high with a clothesline off the top rope that poor Sean was almost decapitated on the way down. Seriously, I've never seen a guy taking a Stun Gun go that high to do it. ​Le bomb de Rougeau ​looked a hell of a lot more devastating with 280-pound Pierre being thrown by Jacques than it did with 240-pound Ray. Of course, the fact that they were landing on a guy who didn't even break two hundred pounds made it look even more impactful. Vince and Randy brought up the Quebec rules match against the Steiners where the Quebecers won the belts in the first place, and I'm at a loss as to why we didn't see more matches like that, especially in circumstances like these where Jacques and Pierre were putting the belts up against their will. It would be hard to have a match where going over the top rope isn't allowed when you have guys like Marty and Sean as your challengers, but wouldn't that be the point of signing the match that way, to ground two high-flyers and make them stay on the mat? I liked Levy no-selling the yelling coming from the broadcast table after his guys took their timeout. It's possible that Scott legitimately may not have heard them, so I guess it works either way. The false finish was probably put in to show that matches can indeed finish during commercial breaks. I could have done without the "second referee reverses first referee's decision" gambit, which we've seen too often from Vince lately, but I didn't have a problem with the spot itself. The Rumble hype got a bit too much for its own good, and am I the only one who thinks that Owen's heel turn might have come off as even nastier if he'd been able to smack around Jannetty and/or Waltman while he was at it? I didn't really care for Savage jumping in the ring to celebrate the win. Let the new champions come to the table and they can shake hands, dance together, or do whatever else they want. Jumping in the ring smacked of Randy trying to be more involved in the company's angles whether they featured him or not (which I guess he was, come to think of it). At least this win didn't come off as a fluke for Marty and Sean like the one against the Shrinkers did. I can't wait to see the MSG rematch! I almost forgot about the clip of Waltman beating Hall that came after this. Heenan must have left on relatively good terms, because his voice is on the clip clear as a bell. If he'd left badly, Vince would probably have voiced over the clip himself live so Bobby wouldn't have been heard.
  6. garretta
    This match never got out of first gear for me. I appreciate that Austin can wrestle on the mat, but that's not what I want to see from him when he's in there with someone like Sting. He shoyld have been running for his life and cheating like mad, trying to stay away from someone who could pulverize him. The finish stank. I disagree with El-P about Pillman being Sting's little buddy again; the Pillman of 1990 would never have been so selfish as to deliberately get Sting disqualified by by taking a shot at Austin. The match probably should have been thrown out the second Fuller got in the ring anyway, but up until Pillman nailed Austin you could make a case for it continuing, since neither wrestler had been touched yet. A superplex ​barely getting a one-and-a-half count? My God, what is wrestling coming to? Don't answer that! Missy Hyatt​ throwing a decent punch at Road Warrior Hawk​? Same question. I still don't get a superstar vibe from Austin. Star, yes. Superstar, no. It was Vince and the Stone Cold character who made him a superstar, and that combination could have made a lot of people a superstar. He might have been a slightly more modern version of the classic blonde heel had he stayed in WCW, but that wouldn't have been enough for transcendent superstardom. Fuller's slipped badly in his promos. I don't think it's the character as much as the new accent. Why Bischoff and/or Dusty insisted in giving him a Kentucky accent when the man already had a perfectly grand natural one from Tennessee I have no idea, but it's really making him hard to understand, plus he can't really tell stories like he used to because Colonel Parker hasn't led the same life as the Tennessee Stud, and is supposed to be a physical coward who's afraid to soil his hands. Not that he would have done it, but I could buy Corny as Colonel Parker before Fuller. As for Austin, promos are another area where he wasn't a superstar before Austin 3:16. There's nothing here that hasn't been said in the same circumstances by literally thousands of similar heels. Tony and Jesse are finally clicking on most, if not all cylinders. No offense, Loss, but I couldn't care less if they didn't know what to call that hold Austin had on Sting. What matters are the little touches, like Jesse talking about how the paint crumbles off of Sting's face during tough bouts or how many hankies Fuller goes through because he's so involved at ringside (which he isn't really, but we'll pretend). The day I need a lesson in technical hold application from Jesse Ventura is the day I'll switch to synchronized swimming, and Tony isn't paid to call holds. I'm not even sure that Gordon Solie ever got that deeply into holds' exact names; if we're thinking of the same hold, he'd have probably called it a "spinning armbar" and left it at that. Jesse's point about smoking wasn't exactly a rant, but it was probably best that Tony ignored it. I liked the stuff about Fuller giving Tony his (supposed) Cuban cigars, and how Tony allowed that he might smoke them when he's not at home, which shows that he's finally loosened up around Jesse and isn't afraid to have a good time. My Exchange of the Night comes after the aforementioned line about Missy hitting Hawk: Jesse: "Does Lois (Tony's wife) ever slap you around like that?" Tony: "I wouldn't tell you if she did." Jesse: "You couldn't ​tell me if she did." Just when they're getting the chemistry they had in the WWF back, they're about to be broken up for good. Figures, doesn't it? (For the record, I also liked Jesse wondering where Pillman got the chicken suit. It sounds like Austin may have been the original opponent for that match, but someone figured out that putting the new U.S. champion in a chicken suit wasn't exactly a way to boost his credibility.) Note to Rick Rude: Please end any and all association with Boss Hogg immediately. Not only would he flush your tough-guy reputation down the sewer instantly, but you're about as good a fit as fine wine and Twinkies.
  7. garretta
    Considering the punishment he took in the early part of the match, it was a miracle that Koshinaka came back to make a fight of it, but he certainly did. My favorite move from him was the butt bump from off the top, which actually looked like it did damage to Tenryu. In the end, though, Tenryu was just too tough, as he has been for most of his opponents over the last while. Tenryu gave Kosh a lot more of the match than you'd expect, since he wasn't really a top guy in New Japan at the time. Were these two friends outside the ring, or was this just a way to sow that Tenryu wasn't as unstoppable as he could sometimes seem, and that the right guy on the right day could have his number?
  8. garretta
    Why are prople going after Gino for saying that Marty and Sean got lucky? They did​ get lucky with the second ref deciding to come down, which as others have noted didn't happen in every match. And let's face it; anyone who loses an exchange with Afa, who's been retired for almost ten years at this point, doesn't deserve to hold a title of any sort. The Shrinkers mauled Marty and Sean at every turn here, and looked like they should have won the match going away. You could tell that Vince had big plans for the Shrinkers in the not-too-distant future, as Gino and Stan put them over at every turn and barely give the champions credit for pluck. Then again, the commentary for this match might have been recorded long after Marty and Sean broke up, so why waste time putting them over as a team at all when they're not going to draw another dime for you as a unit? Maybe it shouldn't ​be that way, but it is, especially in a match where the Shrinkers got eighty-five percent of the offense at least. I liked how Stan indirectly referenced his own past battles with the Shrinkers back when they were the Samoan Swat Team. Vince seemed to be loosening up a bit on guys' pasts being referenced, although the initials "WCW" were still nowhere to be heard for another eight years. Marty as FIP was an interesting decision, but it allowed Waltman to play the young, overenthusiastic face who hurts his team without meaning to. Plus, he's too small to believably take the beating that Marty did. I liked Stan calling Waltman out for continuously distracting Fonzie, and I wish that more announcers would do that instead of simply cheerleading for the faces. Let me amend my statement from earlier; Gino and Stan put over Waltman's incredible arsenal of aerial moves, and quite well in fact. They just didn't act like it would mean much against the size, power, and experience of the Shrinkers. It reminded me a lot of the kind of commentary we used to get when a babyface team would take on Sheik and Volkoff back in the eighties, especially when they were still being heavily pushed in '85 and '86. They were even more awesome than Bundy and Studd, who teamed less often and usually against two of the Heenan Family's enemies. The ending may have been necessary, but it stinks that the only match on tape of Marty and Sean as successful champions had to end this way. I know they were just transitional champions ("Remember, anything can happen on Monday Night Raw!"), ​but this was almost worse than not getting the belts at all. Still, I'm looking forward to their matches against the Quebecers, who are a little bit closer to their size (especially Jacques) and can be thrown around a little more believably (though the Shrinkers bump well for a team as big as they are). On a final note, Afa looked really good, almost as if he was training to get back in the ring for a few six-mans. Did he ever return as a wrestler, even for a match or two? I seem to remember him being marginalized when Albano came back a few months later.
  9. garretta
    Thanks for the info, Tim!
  10. garretta
    This match is a prime example of how commentary can frame the story of a bout. It was short, but there was plenty of painful limbwork, particularly on Austin's part. There was also the story of Pillman wanting a victory over his former partner, who also happened to be the U.S. champion and what a win like that would mean for his career. What's that you say? You don't remember that story being told? That's because it wasn't. A nasty sprint between two former partners, one of them a singles champion, was turned into a ten-minute long commercial for a lousy ​chicken suit match. ​The biggest singles win of Pillman's career, at least on TV, and its actual wrestling implications were totally ignored. Even if this was taped before Starrcade (which it very well might have been), Tony and Jesse should still have mentioned at least once that Pillman was now a top contender for the U.S. title. Instead, we don't even get to see the supposed payoff with the chicken head and Dustin making the save. In fact, we don't see Dustin at all, which leads to the question: Did he make the save or was Tony just making stuff up for TV? I'm short on time at the moment, so let me get to my Line of the Night before I forget it. It goes to Tony, who's really been on fire for some reason lately. He and Jesse are talking over the possible candidates for Commissioner. Jesse badgers Tony about who's the leading candidate in his mind, which leads to this exchange: Tony: "Ray Stevens (I presume he meant the wrestler, not the singer)." Jesse: "​Ray Stevens​? Can he write?" Tony: "To be successful in this sport you don't ​have to write." Not only a great line, but a nice shoutout to Bock's former partner and good friend. If The Crippler had been in better health, I wouldn't have minded seeing him as Bock's deputy. Austin's work on Pillman's arm would be a hell of lot better remembered if the announcers had sold it as much as Pillman did. I'm not sure if it was in connection with this match or not, but I recall someone saying that both Austin and Pillman learned a lot about limbwork from Arn, and they're so right. When I think about how good a Robert Fuller (as ​Robert Fuller, not Boss Hogg)-Pillman match could still be, even if the Tennessee Stud might be losing a step or two, and how bad a Boss Hogg-Pillman match will undoubtedly be, chicken suit or no chicken suit, the mark in me cries his eyes out. (The more I see of Fuller in that ridiculous getup he wears normally, the more I think that the chicken suit was an improvement.) Did Dustin ever get a decent televised rematch for the U.S. title? It certainly doesn't seem like he did, unless for whatever reason they delayed it until spring. If he did, why isn't it on the set? I almost forgot about Jesse nicely tying the new Commissioner into the wearing of the chicken suit, which was a herculean feat if ever there was one. Too bad Bock didn't ​get involved; I'd have liked to see him order Fuller to put the suit on or else!
  11. garretta
    I don't know how some of you are getting so much out of what felt to me like one of those useless little six-man brawls Vince ran from time to time on Superstars and Challenge​ to break up the squashes. As it turned out, we could have had any five other guys in the match as long as Simmons was there to be distracted by Ice Train and pinned. Each guy got to hit a move or two as a consolation prize, but none of it mattered in the end. Flair in particular was absolutely wasted. I'm beginning to think that Bischoff deliberately wanted to marginalize Flair so that Hogan coming in would seem like a bigger deal. The problem is, Flair's been such a nobody for the last few months that beating him won't mean squat by July, whether he has the belt or not. He should have been put in a match where he could have dominated someone and gotten a decisive win to wash away the stigma of being Vader's favorite plaything since early November, and this match definitely wasn't it. Jesse referred to Traylor as "Bossman" again, which can't be an accident by now. For God's sake, Eric, either change Big Ray's gimmick completely so it has nothing to do with law enforcement whatsoever or just let him be Big Bubba Rogers again. This "Bossman, Bossman, na-na-na-NA-na!" stuff directed at Vince has to stop and stop now. Not only is it going to get you sued, but it makes you look about eight years old. That said, Ray didn't look too bad in black. You know a match is a throwaway when Tony spends as much time hyping the upcoming Clash as he does calling the action. Jesse seemed a lot more into the bout; then again, he won't even be ​at the Clash thanks to Heenan, so why should he care about it? So Simmons is with Boss Hogg now, huh? If there's any pair more incongruous than Austin and Fuller, it's Simmons and Fuller. I did ​like Jesse talking about how Fuller's money meant more to him than Florida State's national championship, which is as it should be when you think about it. In matches like this, Rude looks almost like his old self, and that's the case here too. It's in singles matches where he has to go more than ten minutes that we begin to see how hurt he is. Still, you have to give him credit for at least trying to put on a decent show despite it all, which doesn't always happen with injured guys.
  12. garretta
    Pete stole my thunder about the finish. ​Four ​separate teases? Even Vince and Teddy had to show impatience and disgust or be called out as idiots. I'd have rather seen Tenryu in the final four instead of Fatu, but I guess Vince didn't want to give an outsider, even one who he's been working with for years in Japan, what he considered a prime spot. At the very least, could they not have played each man's music at the end? This was SummerSlam all over again for Luger, only this time the fans weren't cheering for him. In fact, they were booing him pretty soundly, which was a surprise. It wasn't his fault that Vince had screwed him worse than anyone this side of Bret Hart in Montreal at SummerSlam, then booked him in what turned out to be a nothing feud that would still have been going on had Borga not hurt his ankle. Maybe the fans just wanted to see Bret get the belt back, which was perfectly understandable. I didn't hear enough of Teddy to be able to tell if he was good or bad as a commentator, but I liked his idea of a Bret-Luger match to determine who would go to Mania, if only so Yoko would have to work just once (which he can barely handle) instead of twice. I fully expect a third Bret-Yoko stinker at Mania X, because I don't think Yoko will be able to move or even breathe once Luger gets through with him. I remember the Hogan-Orndorff SNME ​cage match where they pushed it as a tie, only the replay inadvertently showed about as conclusively as possible that Paul's feet hit the floor before Hogan's, which would have killed Mania III deader than a doornail had it been allowed to stand. Vince apparently learned his lesson, which is why they didn't show Bret and Luger's feet in any type of shot whatsoever. If you want controversy, sometimes you have to create it yourself.
  13. garretta
    Three tremendous performances out of four is a hell of a batting average when it comes to promos these days. Terry, Corny, and Bullet Bob all knocked it out of the park. As for Hoss, I wonder if he wasn't underselling his verbal abilities when he was with Terry so Terry could stand out more. There's simply no way that a man with his experience could be that weak unless he was trying to be. I can understand not being glib; Harley wasn't, to name one example. But he was effective, which Hoss wouldn't have been if Terry hadn't been there as well. I liked Corny admitting that he and his assassins wouldn't be able to injure Bullet Bob badly enough to put him out for good, that the only way to get rid of him was to humiliate him in front of his most ardent fans. Corny knows when to put his enemies over without appearing to suck up to them, which not even other legendary managers like Bobby Heenan truly got the hang of. About the only other guy I ever heard do something like that was Lou Albano on a rare calm day, and Captain Lou was at his best as a raving maniac, so those calm days didn't happen often. Did the SMW fans know about Caudle's day job with Senator Helms? Corny threw in a reference to it at one point, but it was so quick it almost seemed like an inside joke. It didn't seem like the sort of thing the average wrestling fan would try to find out about an announcer. I'm kind of disappointed that the match didn't make the set after we've seen the buildup. Wouldn't something like this count under the "Bad match or not, it's significant" rule? I can't imagine a Texas death match involving Terry Funk being bad unless Bullet Bob chose to be lazy for some strange reason.
  14. garretta
    This was a very purposeful segment. I could have done without Vince's cracks about the coin, but that was the only false note. I wonder if they ever thought about Luger beating Yoko first, then having him drop the belt to Bret. Two title changes in one card would have made Mania X really stand out, and it would have put an end to the whole business about Luger not winning the big one. Then again, you'd think that that stuff would have been over after he beat Windham at the '91 Bash. I liked Bret's reluctance to fight Owen, which if I'm not mistaken he kept all through the feud; he hoped that every one of their confrontations would be the last one. I'd have liked to see Luger-Crush, but they probably already had Savage-Crush in mind for Mania. They can stop with the all-American routine for Luger whenever they want to; that part of the gimmick was rendered useless after SummerSlam, Ludvig Borga be damned. They should have gone back to The Total Package, even if Vince had to tinker with the name. Maybe I'd have brought back the flag tights and the Sousa march for Mania only. I keep going back and forth as to whether it might have been better for Bret and Luger to either have a match on Raw for the Mania shot or have the loser of the coin toss get a shot at King of the Ring. I'm no fan of Yoko having to work twice, particularly since he's looked so awful in his matches against Bret. Surely the Nash match and Neidhart's turn could have been done on ​Raw or ​Superstars.
  15. garretta
    This is three times in a row that Flair's been pulverized by Vader. How anyone can seriously believe that Flair's any sort of threat to Vader long term, champion or not, is beyond me. Starrcade looks like either the fluke of all time or Flair demanding to be put over in his hometown or else, depending on how smart a given viewer is to the business. I didn't catch Vader swearing on camera, but I did ​catch him appearing to threaten Bock until Harley stopped him. Actually, I thought Harley was going to deck Bock for a minute. Heenan had a bit of a point about him getting involved so drastically, but who else was there? Sting still had to deal with Rude. Are we sure that the apparent no-reaction by the crowd to Vader's superplex wasn't stunned silence? Sometimes we expect too much out of crowds on this board. They don't need to pop or boo loudly for every move the wrestlers make. I liked the back and forth between Heenan and Bock, and it's too bad that Tony felt that he had to interrupt. He was definitely in "Will you two shut up and let me call the damn match?" mode. Actually, there was a way around that: Have Sting pin Rude first, then do the double countout with Vader and Flair. That way, Sting pinning Rude is able to be the big deal it should be without being overshadowed by Flair being decimated yet again. It makes sense now that Bock wanted to postpone the SuperBrawl match; how many times can you allow the greatest wrestler in the history of your promotion to be destroyed? I thought Rude looked good for the shape he was in. He was never about the in-ring work as much as his character, even in his best year of '92, and he can still act the part of the gigolo heel whether he can wrestle or not. So this was Bock's first day as WCW Commissioner. Talk about getting into things right away! I can buy him saying that he never approved of chairs, because as big a heel as he was in his day, he almost never used them. I can think of maybe one time I've seen him use a chair, and I'm not even sure about that. He'll definitely be an asset to the company as long as they watch how often they use him. He doesn't need to be as seldom seen as Jack Tunney, but he shouldn't be on every week like Bob Armstrong was (and will be again) either, especially since he's fully retired.
  16. garretta
    Oh, it is? Then why have an Undertaker gimmick? That's the entire point: Everyone in the WWF, no matter how big and bad they think they are, is scared witless at the very sight of Taker. Even Andre would probably have had to have another "heart attack" to get across his (ahem) deathly fear of caskets had they feuded like some thought they should have. Man on man without bullshit, this shouldn't be much of a match, because Yoko's just plain too big to be budged or hurt. It's either have him scared him down to size or don't have the feud at all. Or just book Yoko against Gigante, if he's still around. Vince was such a delightful pot-stirrer here, practically bullying Yoko over toward the casket. If there's anyone who probably needed to show a little more fear, it's him. Of course, he's been around big guys his whole career and everyone knows it, so I give him a pass. As for Corny not being there, this was taped on January 10, the same night as an SMW TV taping in Chilhowie, Virginia. The Bodies and Rock 'n' Roll were the final match on the card, and he and the Bodies were guests on ​Down and Dirty during one of the hours. Personally, I'd have run some kind of suspension angle for myself so I could be gone for four shows (January 15 through February 5) and done Raw ​instead, since this was the big angle leading up to the casket match. He probably didn't trust anyone else to run the tapings, and he knew Fuji would be at Raw ​with Yoko. (Vince must not have thought he was needed either, or he would have taped the angle on a night when Corny could have been there without conflict.) Speaking of the Devious One, he was excellent for someone who hadn't done much serious promo work for at least three months. He seemed to take the whole casket thing in stride until Taker popped out, at which point anyone with sense would have turned and run. I liked him looking over the casket and simply saying stuff like "Big casket", as if it was the most natural thing in the world to be seeing at the time. It made Yoko's fear stand out more, because he was the only one in the building who was afraid to that extent. As much as Yoko selling fear was needed, I could have sworn he fell twice, which was once too often. Selling fear is one thing; acting like such a coward that your own stablemate appears to be disgusted with you is something totally different. I was surprised that Crush appeared to be so hard on Yoko. Wouldn't he have run a mile if he'd been in Yoko's place, or if it had been Savage who popped out of that casket instead of Taker? I agree with Pete about Crush's accent. It's almost like Vince is trying to say that Hawaii's some exotic Far Eastern land instead of our fiftieth state, the way he's portraying Crush. I know Hawaiians have their own language, but I'm sure they identify as American. Crush isn't the only one either; I've told the story before, but Don Muraco mysteriously developed a similar accent once he turned face, and I'm surprised Vince didn't tell Steamboat to work on one too. Maybe he did and Ricky laughed in his face. I know I would have.
  17. garretta
    Now that I know the NJPW-WAR feud would continue, this lost a lot of significance to me. I thought going in that this was it, that Tenryu had now officially beaten NJPW, and that the postmatch was about the two sides making peace. That was my reason for Hase (I thought it was Sasaki, actually) slapping Inoki; he'd extended an olive branch to Tenryu as the elder statesman of the promotion, and the young bucks didn't like it. As I've come to find out, this was just a way to keep Tenryu hot for the real ​blowoff a month later. I'd have rather seen old man Inoki beat Tenryu than Hash, but that's just me, I suppose. I enjoyed Pete's story about how Inoki was the one to work heel. That, to me, is a bigger surprise than the result. I never thought I'd read about a pro-NJPW crowd actually booing Inoki, either. The things you learn from reading this board!
  18. garretta
    Will should have put more of the match on the set and less of the posing. Hogan really feels like he's reaching when he does his postmatch routine in Japan, like he practically has to beg for cheers. The Japanese delivered, but not with very much gusto. I'm the opposite of El-P; I can see why Hogan asked for (or maybe demanded) a spot on the card for Beefcake, whether he sucked or not. But at least he's an actual wrestler. There was no earthly reason for Jimmy to be there except that he's Hogan's chief bootlicker of the moment. I'll be interested to see how or if this changes once they hit WCW, but so far they've been about as incongruous a manager-wrestler pair as I've ever seen. Jimmy hasn't even developed a convincing set of spots to use at ringside, since all of his heel stuff has gone out the window, megaphone included. He's just shown up and jumped around like a nutcase because he's got his hooks in Hogan's legit out-of-the-ring business. I'd have much rather seen Heenan turn face and pair up with him, at least at ringside. Maybe I'd regret that statement if that had ever happened, but I would have loved to find out. One thing Hogan should have done before leaving Vince: Buy the rights to "Real American". He had to use a knockoff when he was a face in WCW anyway (which surprisingly wasn't bad, although the lyrics didn't fit his 1994 character at all), and using it when he was in the NWO might have drawn more real heat than that porno-influenced mishmash they came down to ringside with every single time.
  19. garretta
    Before I go any further, is that Terry Taylor, of all people, as one of the babyfaces? It sure as hell looks like him. I thought the beatdown was going to be the way that they got out of the stip, but I was wrong. Fuller actually went through with it without having to be put to sleep first, which puts him one up on Heenan. He didn't look all that bad in the suit either, at least no more ridiculous than he does as Boss Hogg. When Gene asked him whether he wanted to face all of Pillman's friends, I couldn't help but flash back to the time when the Tennessee Stud would have done his best to go through all of them with his bare hands. That ​I would have paid to see. As it is, I wonder how he works in the ring as Colonel Parker. I suspect not too well, which is a shame. Heenan was great here, not only in begging people not to watch, but in his reactions once he saw Fuller in the suit. I'm sure he was having flashbacks to the many times when he was put into a weasel suit after matches. That's what made his reaction so much better than Jesse's would have been; he knew exactly the humiliation that Fuller was going through. I hope his line about how "The Big Bossman instigated all this" was an innocent slip, but knowing Bischoff, I doubt it. Tony got off some good lines, but I'm already sensing that he and Bobby aren't going to mesh very well. I don't think he reacted properly to Heenan wanting not to see Fuller humiliated, for one thing. Maybe I'm projecting what happened later into things too soon, but Tony's never really been comfortable with heel color guys. He was at his best with face-leaning supergeek David Crockett, or as color man with JR back earlier in the nineties, He and Jesse are just now back to where they were in their WWF days (remember SummerSlam '89?), and now Heenan's taking over and we're almost back to square one. The thing is, there aren't any play-by-play guys left in the company whom Bobby could do better with. In fact, the only other guy even doing play-by-play at all during this time is (if I recall correctly) Bischoff, whose character is even geekier than Tony's. Line of the Segment: Tony, after Heenan tells the fans to go to the refrigerator instead of watching this: "Yeah, pick up a chicken leg or two while you're at it!"
  20. garretta
    The old Heenan, the manager of (almost) champions, was the one who walked down the aisle here. He had a great deal of his old swagger back, and really looked like he'd be a player in more places than the booth. He said in his shoot that he wanted to manage again when he first got there, but they couldn't figure out who to put him with, and after a while when it beciame clear that no one gave a damn about him, he started just showing up and collecting his checks. Let's see, how about getting Fuller out of that Boss Hogg hand-me-down and putting the Brain in his place with Austin, just for starters? Then, in a few months when Hogan starts knocking on Flair's door, have Ric retain him, with references to the fact that he (Bobby) had led him to the WWF title and would help him keep the WCW title from the man whom they both hate more than life itself? You could also play up his past with Bock, with the Brain believing that he has a friend in the commissioner's chair only to find out that a ton of water has gone over the bridge, and now Bock's committed to a fair deal for everyone. You could have him bring Paul Wight in later (though not as Andre's son, for God's sake), and segue into him being the brains behind the NWO, which would allow him to live his real-life dream of managing Hogan. Instead, we're going to get not only an announcer who cared less and less as time went on, but also one of the main people who led to Jesse being shown the door. I know there were other issues between Jesse and WCW as well, but Heenan waltzing in and taking over as the main color guy couldn't have helped matters. I think we've seen the last of Jesse as a pay-per-view commentator already, as a matter of fact; Heenan took his place at SuperBrawl IV. I seem to recall Jesse doing a couple of matches at Bash at the Beach, but I could be wrong about that. Anyway, it's a damn shame that they couldn't have kept both in high-profile positions, because Jesse's never been better and Heenan was in a slump until just before he left Vince. Maybe a new environment will keep him on his toes a little more. Mean Gene was hilarious here, particularly with "You follow me everywhere!​" Those two should have worked together a whole lot more than they did; I wouldn't have minded a bit if ​Nitro ​had ended up a Prime Time-​style recap show that focused on giving them comedy material to work with instead of being live competition for Raw, although I suspect I'm the only one in the world who feels that way. The point is, they squandered so many opportunities for Bobby that it's no wonder he stopped caring about anything but the money. I'm just surprised that he was so honest about it, because it doesn't exactly paint him in a positive light.
  21. garretta
    Thanks, JK. I've enjoyed your reviews a lot, too!
  22. garretta
    I'm guessing we'll have the standard "I'll sign a release absolving WCW from responsibility" stuff from Flair, Pete. It seems almost like they were trying to push Steamboat into Flair's spot, which would have worked fine except that Vader had already disposed of Steamer pretty emphatically on TBS back in November. I didn't hear Vader go off on Harley, but if he did, it wouldn't have been the first time; he shoved him around after the match at Starrcade as well. I wonder if they were thinking about Vader breaking off with Harley and going on his own. They probably should have; Harley's looked dreadfully out of place in Vader's corner for the past year or more. Bock is a good choice for WCW Commissioner; he's a mixture of Jack Tunney and Bullet Bob Armstrong, only he has more natural dignity than Tunney and is a much better serious promo than Bullet Bob. The fine to Vader was a way to show the fans that he was going to get tough on those who break the rules, which is exactly what a commissioner ​should​ do. I didn't mind Gene until the very end, when he asked nobody and everybody, "What's going on here?" You saw Vader try to attack nearly everyone in the room except you and almost cause a major pull-apart brawl, and you ​still don't know what's going on? Get your mind off the hotline and get back in the ballgame, chrome dome. If you meant to ask Ric and Ricky what they were thinking, then ask them that. Didn't they teach you how to use phrases precisely at broadcasters' school so you don't sound like a clueless dipshit?
  23. garretta
    Well. he couldn't stay low-key forever, right? It's back to the trenches and back to the cockiness that makes Flair who he is, for better or worse. There's nothing here that we haven't heard a thousand times about other opponents; the only new ground broken was that he acknowledged his five year-old son (Reid?) for the first time in a typical interview setting. I highly doubt tthat Reid was actually allowed to take the belt to school, but it was a nice line for his old man. I'm a lot more interested in the hot rumors Mean Gene promised us on the hotline. I think I'll start keeping track of the teases he gave from time to time and try to guess what he was trying to spread besides a bunch of fertilizer. If anyone cares to join me, feel free.
  24. garretta
    I didn't notice Flair's black eye, but he definitely looked like he'd been through the mill more than once. The Hogan name drop was a shock, and Gene sort of sloughed over it quickly, since he probably wasn't sure if Bischoff was going to let it air. I liked the questions, and I thought that Gene put his hand on Flair's shoulder out of friendship more than anything else. Even if it was a wrapup signal, it was a lot more subtle than waving a finger in a guy's face, which is what he normally does in a situation like this. Cutting Ric off while he was acknowledging his family was ridiculous, though, especially since Gene had asked a question specifically about them. At the very least, they should have let Ric say his piece and edited it in post-production if they needed to. I thought Flair was very complimentary toward Vader, but he probably won't stay that way, since there are more confrontations between them on the horizon. Still, any man who makes Ric Flair doubt himself, even briefly, is quite a man indeed.
  25. garretta
    This was great at Starrcade, and it's great now. Too bad the match didn't live up to it.
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