NintendoLogic

Taichi/Ospreay was awesome. By far the most Kawada-esque performance Taichi has ever turned in.

I was terribly busy this past week, but I should have a review for Micro's match pretty soon. Meanwhile, here's something for cad.

I'm worried Dream has the kind of Dancin' Homer gimmick that'll die horribly on the main roster because it goes over Vince's head.

Yeah, Dave said that Vince rewrote the show to have less HEAT~! because they were in Houston and he wanted to put smiles on faces since Bush had just died.

I don't think I've heard a single Dynamite-related anecdote that reflected well on him as a person. Still, he repaid whatever karmic debt he had incurred several times over in his final years.

Plus, Houston is usually one of WWE's stronger cities. It really is astounding that this company has managed to achieve record profitability when interest in the product has never been lower by most metrics (to wit, they actually lost money on house shows last quarter). Maybe the contrarian take that Vince fell into success is spot on. Maybe not entirely, more like 75%.

In other news, it looks like Vince finally saw The Dark Knight Rises.

When I read the show recaps, it seems like 90% of the segments end with a babyface being laid out by the heels. I don't know why anyone would want to watch a show that's a constant bummer.

Microstatistics:

It does feel like every single aspect of society has become more politicized in recent years. I think a big part of that is Trump's singular talent for making everything about him. As Will Leitch said, it's probably the only thing about him that's genuinely impressive.

So, um...are they really building Raw around Baron Corbin as the top heel?

Count me in.

The (significantly less vulgar) English term is "clickbait."

What consequences should he face? Should he be fired for having shitty opinions hardly anybody would be aware of if someone hadn't taken the time to scour his posting history? Or does he just need to be "called out"? If the New Day or whatever want to do something like that, then fine. But what purpose does "calling out" a complete stranger serve beyond virtue signaling?

Why should we care if Lars Sullivan is a bigot? It's not like he's a politician with the ability to shape policy or a business executive with power over personnel decisions. He's just a wrestler. And the smart move is to assume that all wrestlers are moral reprobates until proven otherwise.

The tag match was pretty fantastic. Finish aside, that was the match they should have had at Starrcade. Jerry suplexing Youngblood onto the ropes looked brutal. I'm surprised that wasn't done more often.

The guys this year I've felt compelled to go out of my way to see and consistently enjoyed are Hiroshi Tanahashi, Minoru Suzuki, WALTER, LA Park, and ZSJ, in roughly that order. Shayna Baszler is probably my favorite worker who has yet to have a truly great match. I'm kind of torn on Ronda. One the one hand, she's overdelivered every time she's been in the ring, and even if she practices her big matches beforehand, nothing she does feels choreographed or cooperative. On the other hand, she's barely into double digits in matches worked. I want to see how she does when she has to work week-in and week-out.

I checked out the cruiserweight match on a whim. Junior spot-fu will never be my cup of tea, but Ali bumping like he was trying to cash in on a Lloyd's of London insurance policy made it quite the car-crash spectacle. A lot of the reports said they managed to wake up a dead crowd, but I didn't really see it that way. There was a "this is awesome" chant, but it came across to me like the crowd was doing it out of obligation rather than genuine excitement. Like they felt they had to give Ali and Murphy something since they were out there killing themselves.

If I was feeling charitable, I would say that Mauro is a mixed bag overall but a net positive because he seems genuinely enthusiastic and doesn't sound like an overproduced WWE automaton. I mean, as grating as his shtick may be, at least it's authentically his. So I was pretty baffled to see people on Dave's Twitter feed talking about him like he's Lance Russell.

I was on the road when the show happened, so when I got a chance to watch, I decided to skip straight to the good stuff. The women's match was fantastic. Ronda has a Regal/Kandori-esque knack for forcing opponents out of their comfort zone and getting them to work her match while remaining true to themselves. And she has an instinctive grasp of selling, which is probably the most important trait for an inexperienced wrestler to possess. As for the main event, it's probably the best possible Bryan/Lesnar match we can expect at this point. But there was far too much dead time for it to be a truly great match, let alone on the level of the Styles match from last year. I suspect that WWE didn't want the match to be too good for fear of the fans getting behind Bryan too much.

Dream can work and has boatloads of charisma. He'll be fine as long as he doesn't get the Zayn/Bayley treatment.

Christ, Wargames felt like it would never fucking end. The hilarious thing to me was that even the crowd barely gave a shit. They'd pop huge for the big spots and then go back to being completely silent.

The latest Observer discusses Brazo de Plata/Super Porky's current condition. His hips are dislocated, his knees are shot, and he doesn't have the money for surgery. Given how many luchadores from the 70s and 80s ended up in rough shape in their later years, I think we need to reconsider whether not taking flat back bumps is really that much better for you in the long run. It reminds me of when people would argue that hard-hitting matches in Japan weren't really that bad because they had time to recuperate between tours. I guess what it boils down to is that there really is no way to safely do professional wrestling. One way or another, you're going to have to pay the piper.

My top two at the moment are Okada/Tanahashi from Dontaku and the Tanahashi/Ibushi G1 final. I'd give the nod to the former, but I can see myself changing my mind after a rewatch. Also, I still need to see the Okada/Tanahashi matches from the G1 and Destruction. Other than that, I loved WALTER's matches against Tyler Bate in Progress and Will Ospreay in OTT. Aja Kong vs. Hikaru Shida was a MOTYC that came pretty much out of nowhere. WWE this year has been a dumpster fire for the most part, but I really liked Rollins/Ambrose vs. Ziggler/McIntyre at Hell in a Cell. Park/Rush mask vs. hair was shaping up to be the greatest thing ever, but it was not to be. And of course there's Okada/Omega (aka The Greatest Match of All Time).

I can take some solace in being vindicated when I said that Nia was a stupid clumsy oaf who can't do anything right. Also, I love it when people imagine the "b-but [actual good wrestler] injured people too" argument to be an epic gotcha when it actually reinforces the point it's supposed to be arguing against. If you can't have good matches, you at least need to be able to protect whoever you're in the ring with. Ideally you want someone to do both, but you have to do at least one. If they absolutely have to keep Nia around, make her an 80s WWF monster heel and have her do nothing but bearhugs and nerve holds. As for the Bryan heel turn, it doesn't bother me because he's an awesome heel and nothing matters anyway. Still, imagine what the reaction would have been if eight months ago you predicted that WWE would manage to cool him off to the point where they'd have to turn him before the end of the year to keep him in the mix as a top guy.