Viaje del Parties: 2016 in Review

[Parties]

Added #18) Team Tremendous vs. Premier Athlete Brand (EVOLVE 54, 1/23)
I’ve watched this match three times because I kept getting interrupted during it. Carr and Barry remain fantastic: such a fun act that feel unlike anything else on the indies right now. Nese continues to look unimpressive, and the PAB dissension angle felt sloppy, even if Konley will be booked as the breakout star going forward. Tremendous were the story here and really excelled, looking better even than they did during their EVOLVE 53 match. This was almost a squash as Carr in particular looked like a beast dismantling his opponents, and Barry’s flight off the ropes was likewise joyous in a way that recalls Mikey Whipwreck at his most agile.

Added: #23) Matt Riddle vs. Fred Yehi (EVOLVE 54, 1/23)
My initial writeup is that Yehi looks too strong throwing Riddle, as you have your Legit Shoot selling for Worked Shoot Pro Wrestler as if shot out of a cannon. But re-watching portions of this a second time, Yehi’s really entertaining and I’d rather watch him pop and lock suplexes than see Riddle do plodding pseudo-grappling. That said, Riddle’s comeback is well done and by the finish this feels like genuinely good American shoot style in the same way that I can enjoy Dons Frye or Nakaya Nelson in Japanese promotions.

Added #17) Tommaso Ciampa vs. Ethan Page (EVOLVE 54, 1/23)
EVOLVE is pretty amazing right now: even the matches between guys I don’t like are good. This was a slugfest war as you have Page continuing to work his falsely passive babyface gimmick, while Ciampa is a guy who just got his ass kicked by Samoa Joe over on NXT and now aspires to be Samoa Joe. Much of this is Ciampa suplexing Page onto guardrails and ropes, and applying headlocks that look like chokes. This has one glaring miss in which they do a heavily cooperative spot where they’re both on the top ropes and Ciampa does a pretty lame fallaway slam by lifting Page onto his shoulders. This spot and variations on it always take forever to set up, are glaringly telegraphed, and always end up looking like shit anyway because both guys are understandably trying to not get killed on a dangerous top rope headdrop. The finish of this was a badass series of flying knees that made for the best Ciampa outing I’ve seen, and the first time he’s looked to me like an EVOLVE-caliber guy.

Added: #4) Zach Sabre, Jr./Sami Callahan vs. Drew Gulak/TJ Perkins (EVOLVE 54, 1/23)
Sami-TJP opening to this is so fun. Perkins is a surprisingly great addition to the company as he’s a stylistic contrast and everyone else being so different from him makes his dynamo flying really stand out. Wrestling is a game of embellishment, and the way TJP’s stuff seems exceptional here is a great example of how you can still in 2016 condition your audience to watch a slowed-down matwork-and-striking product so that your sporadic high flyer really matters. The matwork here in turn is awesome, as Perkins and Sabre are fantastic escaping in and out of leglocks, Gulak is outright trying to tear apart Sabre’s knee, and Callahan works his controlled frenzy gimmick by doing amateur chain wrestling the way a shark would attempt it in the high seas. The stuff with Callahan kicking Riddle in the head just because he felt like it was awesome. Loved Sabre working this like a strong ace as it was a moment where his size and gawkiness didn’t deter him. TJP going for Romero’s stupid spider-in-the-ropes pose and getting punched out of it by Sabre was great. There’s a moment in the middle of this where Gulak breaks up what would have been a suplex off the top rope from Sabre to Perkins. Something about the way he did it made me think, “That’s what Fuchi or Jumbo would have done in a great 90s All Japan tag.” What’s shocking about this match is that after a while it really seems as good as a good 90s All Japan tag. Some of the late breakups of pins here are excellent stuff that you’re gonna see other indie workers rip off in the years to come. I will say that the final exchange here between Sami and Perkins is just a little overwrought, but when you consider how many great moving parts there were right to the end of this, you can forgive them for going just a little bit over the top in the last couple moves. Great stuff that anyone and everyone should watch.

Added #13) Peter Kassa vs. Tracy Williams (EVOLVE 54, 1/23)
I’m becoming to EVOLVE what Meltzer is to NJ: every match is better than the last. This was a black tights battle of young lions who they’re clearly trying to book into top spots down the road. Kassa as 2016 Billy Jack Haynes continues to be really awesome. Williams’ “pure sports build” video was hit and miss, but I am amazed by this Brooklyn guy who looks like he should be a hipster barber or serving microbrew pints at the nearest watering hole is managing to become a really good worker. This was a cool story of point-counterpoint effectively told, as they kept deflecting one another’s big offense. It’s effective not only in justifying over the top moves, but in making each guy seem intelligent in ring. Good finish as well playing into a story of fatigue setting in. There was a very natural face-heel dynamic here too. I thought they’d cast Williams as the heroic upstart for longer than they did, but he easily comes across as a prima donna here, while Kassa is an affable strongman fighter who never speaks, lives in the woods, and uses a piece of tree bark as his daily soap.

[Grimmas]

Mini Hator/Tequilita vs. Chamaco Gurrola/Mini Difunto (Monterrey, 1/31)

Tequilita is one of those slow fat guys who I actually enjoy because they’re slow. I surprisingly kinda enjoy Ryota Hama for the same reason: there’s a delayed inevitability to his offense. One weird side note based on a pop-up ad in this: it’s amazing that Monterrey wrestling and the Super Bowl play on the same channel in Mexico. I’m sure there’s a better explanation, but that seems like the World Cup airing on POP TV. The heated Hator-Defunto exchange 2/3rds of the way through this is where it’s at. Mask ripping and Irish Whipping a guy the full length of an entrance ramp. DIfunto trying to hack Hator’s legs off with a low running dropkick was crazy. I didn’t love all of this, as there were some listless moments, but the final deathblow is remarkable and must be seen to be believed.

My review of this match.

 

https://prowrestlingsuperblog.wordpress.com/2016/02/15/mini-hator-tequilita-vs-chamaco-gurrola-mini-difunto-monterrey-1312016/

[Parties]

Yeah, that star rating sounds right, and Tequilita's fattitude was the highlight.

[pol]

Great stuff here. I'd like to see what you think of Yuji Okabayashi vs. Ryota Hama (2/9, BJW). I thought it was one of the better Japanese matches of the year and worked in a way that even people generally down on modern Japanese wrestling should enjoy.

[Parties]

Jun Akiyama/Yuma Aoyagi vs. Kento Miyahara/Jake Lee (AJPW, 2/16)

Under the radar match that turned out to be good. A few years back Akiyama and Miyahara had an excellent singles, so this piqued my interest. Aoyagi is the rookie who Akiyama gave his old-school blue tights to for being a protege-level student: he delivers here, running around elbow smashing Miyahara off the apron and crushing Lee with good matwork. The Akiyama-Miyahara interactions are fun veteran spots: their take on a series of Irish whips on the floor makes for good comedy. The home stretch is hot, or at least very warm, and this is an immensely watchable twenty minute tag filmed at what I assume is the Japan equiv. of Memphis’ Channel 5 studio. This is where Kings Road meets its mortal end. Part of what makes this so good is that it shows how much better wrestling is when filmed in front of a steady single camera without jump cuts. You get a better, more impressive sense of action and how it feels live.

Jay White vs. David Finlay (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

Strong seven minute opener between two guys looking to prove something. Finlay worked well as the tenacious guy from underneath while White was the blue chipper whose prowess led to the inevitable beatdown. Finlay in particular impressed me with his dad’s rolling Fireman’s carry slam and wrenching on White’s head during pinning combinations for some added realism. These two laid it in on the striking and other offense too, as they managed to work fast but still hit quite hard.

Jushin Liger/Tiger Mask IV/Ryusuke Taguchi vs. Kazushi Sakuraba/Gedo/YOSHI-HASHI (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

Liger-Sak on the mat is fun: you can see Liger working hard and both of them trying to make it credible. Tiger Mask even hits a good kick in on Hashi here. Gedo has a great look for wrestling as he’s just a bearded psycho here, almost in the spirit of Dick Togo. But the inexplicable star of this is Taguchi. I believe Meltzer dismissed this as typical Taguchi, which is why he and I differ on assessing lots of wrestling, as this was anything but the norm. Fired up Taguchi running the ropes to smash his butt into people’s faces is surprisingly awesome, and he showed tons of ambition and veteran wit here when hulking up and mounting a fun comeback.

Tencozy vs. Yuji Nagata/Manabu Nakanishi (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

This was awful, but it feels pointless to even pan it. Four immobile, beat-up guys having a bad ten-minute tag. Tenzan doing terrible chops so that he doesn’t have to bend his elbow. Guys shoving each other in the chest lazily. I’ve liked Kojima at times and he’s actually pretty expressive here, esp. in contrast to the other three guys. I guess Nagata has decent moments here too? The Nakanishi-Tenzan stuff is just brutal, but Kojima by the end has some nice Roddy Piper mannerisms that save the finish from being a total mess.

Los Ingobernobles vs. Kushida/Michael Elgin/Juice Robinson (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

Naito’s a guy who I liked as a rookie. In his black trunks days he looked like the truth: lots of aggression, sharp technique, and good hope spots. When he became an impotent third-string babyface, he failed. Just a massive disappointment with bad matches. But this new gimmick is a ton of fun and he is killing it in the role. Him being the twisted, disgraceful leader of a band of gravediggers is highly entertaining, and this is one moment where Gedo/Jado actually deserve the praise they get for being elite bookers.

I thought this was a tremendous match. Bushi is charismatic as the smug rudo jerk. Kushida’s really good as the flying babyface: even when doing pointless cartwheels into dropkicks, he’s still really fun and working fast enough that you can forgive his indulgences. Naito gives a beatdown on the floor to Kushida early on that is gold, and in the ring he has some great interactions with everybody. Even Elgin, who I’ve been very critical of in the past, has some good power offense here. Robinson was fine, and I thought he showed charisma. Even EVIL was good. So here you have Bushi, who I’ve always liked, and then five guys who’ve sucked recently but all suddenly seem to really be delivering in their roles. i also really liked that this was the beginning of more to come in building heat between Kushida and this faction.

Toru Yano/The Briscoes vs. Bad Luck Fale/Yujiro Takahashi/Tama Tonga [NEVER 6-Man Titles] (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

How great are the Briscoes? They are perfect for this company right now. So what is needed in terms of credible chaos. They even make Yano, Japan’s favorite Louis Anderson impersonator, into something good. Fale and Yujiro were terrible: just a bunch of slow, meaningless clubbering. This is the NWO C-team for sure. Tonga is a bump machine who worked hard flying around the ring. Briscoes try to save the match with great coordinated team spots, and they make this watchable amidst some truly bad work from Fale.

The Young Bucks vs. re:Dragon vs. Matt Sydal/Ricochet [Jr. Tag Titles] (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

Horrible Matt Jackson-Ricochet exchange to start: Matt’s awful overacting mixed with Ricochet’s overblown acrobatics. We get a terribly dumb spot where O’Reilly back body drops his partner out of the ring so that Fish can hang onto the ring post and flip onto a bunch of other guys. That spot aside, they actually looked pretty good and worked such devastating moves at such a fast pace that even in their excess they seem impressive. Everyone else truly sucked. The second helping of Matt Jackson and Ricochet here was remarkably bad. You’d be hard-pressed to find a more business exposing worker than Matt right now. The Cody Hall shit was dreadful. I’ve never seen an NWO imitation act that was also actively imitating the things that killed WCW, but such is the Bullet Club. I’ve long liked Sydal, but post-ayahuasca Sydal is really hit-or-miss. Like he’ll take a great bump into the corner, but then he gets a look in his eye where you can tell that in his own mind he’s riding a raft down the Parana River shared with a monkey and the ghost of Neem Karoli Baba. The final spot was cool, but why does Nick Jackson laugh through every bump he takes? I say this as someone who really enjoyed the Bucks when I saw them live at an ROH show last year, but they have to be in the running for Most Overrated right now.

Katsuyori Shibata vs. Tomohiro Ishii [NEVER Title] (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

Horrible opening. Same dumb premise as their Tokyo Dome match where each guy lets the other freely punch and suplex them. Once they went to the mat I actually liked this, but this one just took too long to get good. It’s bizarrely stupid that these guys continue to insist on working the way they do, as the second half of this was absolutely great, except for Shibata botching a Triangle Choke and Ishii having to put himself into it. Really hard to judge their matches as the home stretch in both has been tremendous, but the stuff at the start is so glaringly bad.

Hiroshi Tanahashi/Togi Makabe/Tomoaki Honma vs. Kenny Omega/Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

Gallows and Anderson weren’t much here. The Bullet Club gimmickry is so bad that it isn’t even worth continuing to address here. Just idiocy. Makabe always blows. Honma’s wasted here. Tanahashi’s only in this match to get beaten down by Omega. Every 2016 WWE Divas match has been better than this. Every single one.

Kazuchida Okada vs. Hirooki Goto [iWGP Title] (NJPW New Beginning in Osaka, 2/11)

Typical Goto title challenge. Never gets it done, looks mediocre in the process, no one cares. In the final minutes Goto looked like a true jobber and no threat at all to Okada. Which is a fine way to book, but really an odd position for Goto to have been in for the better part of eight years. Dull match, two stars, time to watch real wrestlers on Fastlane.

[tim]

Are those top two matches available online or do you still have to buy individually from Black Terry Jr? If so, how?

[bucky]

The Panteras v. Navarros matches aired on IWRG TV and can be found on Cubsfan's Youtube.

[Bierschwale]

Really waiting for the mid-Feb posts. I think that CMLL had three legitimate MOTYC-level matches in a five day span (the Team Casas-Team Volador trios, Dorada-Mephisto, and Silueta-Zeuxis).

[Parties]

6) Chris Hero vs. Matt Riddle (EVOLVE 57, 3/20)
Huge reaction for Hero, who's looking... huge? "You're a fuccboi" chants for Riddle. What an amusing heel this guy is, in that it's a totally different flavor than most grunting angry guys. This guy's a heel because he's sort of an idiot tool, which is an interesting take. Crowd gave him hell for not wearing shoes: Hero worked his feet to the delight of the fans, crushing/biting toes to the horror of all. Hero also had a great escape out of a choke here that required him to do WoS wiggling and a kip-up, which was perhaps the most impressive athletic feat of the night. Riddle bleeding a ton out of his mouth off one of Hero's elbow smashes. Story of the match was that this was Riddle's biggest challenge to date (perhaps even moreso than Thatcher the previous night), but that he rose to the occasion with awesome flying knees off the ropes and the ability to take a serious beating. It was like a prime Kevin Von Erich outing, such that it turned him face to some.

 

7) Aztec Warfare II (Lucha Underground, 3/23)
Not the best match of the year to date, but possibly the most fun. Thought virtually everyone came out of this looking good and that the pace was well-kept. Even guys who I haven’t liked much of late (Jack Evans, Johnny Mundo) or ever (Prince Puma, Drago) did well here. The criticisms against the match (Cobb’s height, Fenix being a one-week transitional champ, a 21st guy being added to the match just because they can, Caterina having the power to keep Pentagon out of the match) are ingrained aspects of the company that don’t feel as bad in context of this show. Rey had a good outing, I loved the Sagrada run, and either because of editing or true prowess this was probably the most I’ve ever liked Ricochet: his stuff works best in small doses during a massive spotfest. Crowd also really helped sustain this as they were on fire the full 40 minutes.

 

8) Zack Sabre, Jr. vs. Drew Gulak [best in the World Challenge Series] (EVOLVE 57, 3/20)
Gulak-Sabre in front of crowd that doesn't necessarily love cravates. The trading of holds here was really good: Gulak really felt like he was living up to his gimmick as trainer-technician. Really awesome to see the innovative counters so well executed here. Not kidding: a few mins in, Sabre becomes like the sixth guy on this show to bleed hardway. I'm not even a fan of blood, but that's remarkable. Despite the fancy intricacies, this never felt like an exhibition, as everything was cinched and they were unafraid of clubbering. Selling was smart too as Sabre's ankle became the story of the match and his reactions were excellent. Finish got a huge reaction and standing ovation, so if nothing else people are buying Sabre going on this WOTY gauntlet. Could have just been viewing it live, but I'd be interested to see if/where this lands in MOTYC conversations.

 

17) Timothy Thatcher vs. Caleb Konley [EVOLVE Title] (EVOLVE 57, 3/20)
I’m a bit surprised this was deemed too long by other viewers, though I get it in that it started slow and got better over time. I think someone's bled hardway in every match on this show: in Thatcher-Konley it was both of them, unless Konley somehow bladed his back for no reason. Konley's good but felt like a lame duck challenger. Match was early on a little by-the-numbers even with both guys working hard, but improved over time even in front of a bored crowd who were talking about Sting's retirement and Thatcher's chest hair. This built well, as Konley started throwing bombs and Thatcher worked hard to get over submissions to a crowd who didn't want them. Wacky ref bump leads to 2.9 count for Konley. Crowd approves of Thatcher headbutting Konley's valet. Ends up a very solid B+ title defense that it felt like they had to earn it rather than have it gifted acclaim by the audience.

 

30) Negro Casas vs. Volador, Jr. [Hair vs. Hair] (CMLL, 3/18)
Casas debuted in 1979. Others who did the same: Buddy Landell, Curt Hennig, Dean Malenko, Honky Tonk Man, Barry Horowitz, Jim Neidhart. Picture a situation where one of those guys or one of their contemporaries was still the best worker in America or close to it. That’s Casas.

Match itself had some nice moments: the ranas off the top rope and the other one that sends Volador into the dasher boards, the sunset flip to the floor, and a bunch of other crazy bumps that I can’t believe a 56 year old and his favorite Sal Rinauro imitator are taking. Volador has always been an odd duck to me, but he did fine and didn’t really make any mistakes. I also like that they went all out for 20 good minutes at a real pace rather than doing two lame falls early in search of the finish.

 

33) Sami Callahan vs. Tracy Williams (EVOLVE 57, 3/20)
Long feeling out process, with Williams as something of a local babyface despite the Catch Point affiliation. Good match but not much in the way of storytelling, compared to what had come before w/ Hero-Riddle. Williams is being built up as a burgeoning star in the company, while Callahan was good if not great in his assault. Highlight was the struggle on the mat where both guys suddenly turned it way up as Williams went for an arm bar. Whenever this was on the mat, it felt like its own unique thing. But during the head drops and brawling, it seemed too much like a lesser version of matches that had already occurred. Still, the finish was strong and it seemed to win the crowd over by the end. No hardway blood, but Sami did chop Williams' neck in such a way that a bunch of massively bruised blood vessels appeared, so I'm counting it and the streak continues.

 

34) Dr. Wagner, Jr. vs. El Mesias/Texano, Jr. [bull Terrier Match] (AAA, 3/4)
AAA is a mess right now, but even with that in mind and my hatred of all handicap matches, I wanted to like this because of the guys and the stip. This is also not a full-on handicap match as there’s dissension between the heels. This is a fun veteran performance from Wagner: you get a Dusty Rhodes vibe from him here where he knows how to tease victory before having it snatched away. Banderas is another guy having a noteworthy year and this should be added to his resume. Only rough moment in this is a truly bad run-in from a fourth guy that has to be seen to be believed. If you include the post-match brawl as part of the overall ranking (as I do), this gains points. Not a great match, but a grisly flavor of heavyweight wrestling that’s sort of missing right now and feels really fresh as a result.

 

35) Drew Galloway/Johnny Gargano vs. Team Tremendous [EVOLVE Tag Titles] (EVOLVE 57, 3/20)
Bill Carr working in old Adidas pants kind of kills the gimmick, but the main event delivered pretty well. Started as a brawl after Galloway's fired up promo about wanting to fight. Gargano still doesn't do it for me and all his thigh slapping was exposed here. Champs cut off the ring to work Barry as FIP. Carr's eventual gut-wrench duplex on Drew and gigantic tope con hilo were insane. Lots of fun double team spots as you had all of the signature Tremendous stuff and then a lot of arena-sized selling from Galloway. Hierarchy felt well established in that both teams looked good even as Tremendous were over-matched at this point in their run. Galloway was presented as the top star in the company, even over Thatcher really. Show ended without angle or much fanfare, but well worked throughout. Back in NYC six weeks from now on May 7th, which was kind of surprising.

39) Rush vs. Maximo Sexy [Hair vs. Hair] (CMLL, 3/18)
This starts off like the best possible version of a Rock vs. Foley brawl, as the blue chip guy abuses the affable lug, yet the crowd still likes both of them. First fall - like much of the match - was never in doubt and just felt like a means to an end. Maximo is having a great year: credit to him for coupling a dominant Rush performance with some really nice hope spots and selling. He really makes you believe he can win and the crowd is so entertained by his antics. This improves a lot once the seconds are ejected from ringside, which is what you want if you’re gonna go to that trope. Kind of disappointing in that this never kicked into bloodsport gear of true heat, if only because the finish was a foregone conclusion, but still solid stuff.

 

43) Tommaso Ciampa vs. TJ Perkins (EVOLVE 57, 3/20)
Ciampa-Speedball has been changed to Ciampa-TJP. Jeers of "Suicide" and "Fuck TNA" amuse Perkins. "Ciampa's Gonna Chomp You" soon follows and is not a good chant at all. Then comes "Remember the safe word" during a wrist lock. Ciampa hits variety of moves on TJP's trucker hat a la Flair on his coat. Surprisingly good, stiff back-and-forth match. Perkins looked like a real vet here in the way he built to high spots. His chest was bleeding from Ciampa's strikes, and he is a good opponent to make Ciampa's various head drop spots into something coherent. Highlight was TJP's tope to the floor as he rocketed out of that ring like all hell.

 

58) Ethan Page vs Fred Yehi (EVOLVE 57, 3/20)
Page's affable goof gimmick continues. Yehi was amazing live: dude is in great shape, works really hard in putting over holds, sells intelligently, and continues to have the best shoes in wrestling. If Regal wasn't taking a good look at him, it's only because of his height. Brilliant elbow smash from Yehi to Page here. Page continues to seem mediocre and his sportsmanship phoniness is wack, but his finisher is either intentionally or unintentionally vicious as he dropped Yehi's head right onto his knee. Really well worked if it was on purpose. Post-Match schmozz with Premier Athlete Brand was royally whatevs, and the crowd mocked them the whole time.

60) Dragon Lee/Máscara Dorada/Místico/Valiente vs. La Ola Amarilla [Okumura/Kamaitachi/Fujin/Raijin] (CMLL, 3/18)
Wrestling needs more multi-man team battles in the midcard. Enjoyed Valiente fishhooking Fujin. Most of this wasn’t as good as I wanted it to be. I swear the ref screws up like five pin counts here, or just looks really weird and fake in the way he counts them. Okumura doesn’t do much. Fujin and Raijin are along for the ride and do some pretty lousy bumping/base work here. The Dragon Lee-Kamaitachi stuff is entertaining, but very indie headdrop in having zero psychology and just going from flip to flip. But after a while Valiente starts to elevate the action, and Mistico hits a tremendous dive to the floor.

[Bierschwale]

Dragon-Kama has a very consistent psychology running through it, it's just not exactly a Go match. It's literally a snake vs. a mongoose. Or, more accurately, a dragon vs. a weasel demon who wears blades on his outfits like a fighting cock. It's "I will kill myself to make sure that you die". It's all just about move introductions and finding counters to those moves and so on.

 

It's more Lucha Underground than any real LU feud ever.

[Parties]

That's actually a great point about what's made their feud fun to this point: they understand the showman theatrics needed to make Wile E. Coyote vs. Road Runner work. I've liked their other matches, I just thought this 8-man was a bit lackluster in all of the non-Kama heels were clunky and it felt like Lee-Dragon doing a short dog and pony show version of their stuff in the middle of a sloppy midcard tag. They went straight to the kitchen sink because they were a limited portion of what was happening in full. Not a terrible match, just kind of middle of the road. Really the highlight of the whole thing is the insane air that Mistico gets on his big leap.

[Parties]

Wrestlemania 32, Overall: May go down as one of the weirdest shows the company has ever done: a time capsule misfire exhibiting everything that is great and horrible about WWE at this moment. The last two hours (HITC, Battle Royal, Rock-Wyatts, and the main event) in particular is incredible in its oblivion. As you can see from the writeup below, I thought the first four matches of the show were fun if unspectacular, but that the show fell off a huge cliff with Styles-Jericho. MOTN was the Women’s Title match by far, and I say that as someone who hates Triple Threat matches. I also think one of the performances of the night was Xavier Woods working as Ricky Morton tag babyface, which got lost in the drone of a 6.5 hour show. Anyone who disagrees with ranking a six second Rock-Rowan match dead last here needs to understand I'm evaluating the whole segment as one package.

 

77) Ryback vs. Kalisto [uS Title] (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

“Michinoku Driver?”

“…Modified.”

 

The extended superplex was awesome. Also: Mauro is stellar. Pulling the Bob Orton ref in that moment was so on point. Lawler heeling on Hayabusa was kind of shitty, but I assume he didn’t hear “the late” part of Ranallo’s line and that Lawler has no idea who Hayabusa is. Surprised to see Kalisto retain. Solid if totally uneventful, forgettable stuff.

 

60) Total Divas (Brie Bella/Natalya/Paige/Alicia Fox/Eva Marie) vs. Bad and Blonde [Lana/Naomi/Tamina/Emma/Summer Rae] (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Emma was the MVP here with the badass Max Max look, the wheelbarrow suplex, and serving as the ring general who kept everything in check. Also liked Naomi’s kicks and Natalya’s stomp. Fox should have been in more. Even Lana was fine, with Tamina looking like the only clunky one here. I maintain that Eva Marie will be a good worker a year from now and that the crowd is wrong on her. I genuinely enjoyed this as I am a mark for 5-on-5 stuff even when it’s pretty short/elementary, and am always rooting for a good women’s division.

 

I concur with the sentiment that Booker is terrible, but in a way that’s familiar to me as a guy who watches NFL/NBA/MLB stuff where you need one retired player on every panel who speaks in nothing but cliches and meandering non-predictive hype.

 

90) The Usos vs. The Dudley Boyz (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Surprisingly decent match even with that weirdly abrupt superkick finish. Bubba was showing some Bully Ray heat in there and even with the face-heel dynamic off there was a lot of nice action. Could have been early on the Pontiac Silverdome show in ‘87 and worked just as well (tables aside). Usos getting booed was lame: so far I have no love for this smark troll crowd.

 

56) 7-Man Ladder Match [iC Title] (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Sami-Owens faceoff initially made this seem like it'd be them and five other supporting characters along for the ride, but everyone delivered. Zayn's fired-up run was stellar. Cara's big bump to the floor and later dive through the ladder was incredible: he wins hardest worker kudos here. Loved Owens' big frog splash and that for once there was a believable faceoff struggle at the top of a ladder (Zayn and Owens throwing bombs). The Ryder win is not only a surprise, but in the running for biggest upsets in Mania history. Feels like Owens could win it back tomorrow night, but interesting pop for Zack nonetheless.

 

95) Chris Jericho vs. AJ Styles (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Most choreographed match on the show and it was still mediocre. Way too many spots wedged in to make Jericho seem like "the wily vet" genius. Reminscent of 2000s HBK being depicted as the agile cat-like athlete while constantly blowing spots. So many moments where Styles had to hit awkward flimsy offense just so that Y2J could counter it. Calf Crusher was good: Styles Clash always getting countered wasn't. Finish was obviously terrible: hopefully Styles can now exit this feud and move on.

 

Dome setting is great for this show: way better than broad San Francisco daylight last year. Feels like the biggest show of the year, and the lackluster card has over-delivered so far.

 

69) The New Day vs. The League of Nations (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

ND get the biggest reaction of the night to the surprise of no one. Why isn’t this for the titles? I smell shenanigans. I’d forgotten how great Rusev is: his trash talk and standing plancha ruled. What a FIP performance from Woods: looked to be trying hard to prove himself as a worker and did, and he got to live the boyhood dream of getting comical air off a Stunner. Sheamus’ chanting forearms were fun. Really bad Kofi-Del Rio misfire doing that dumb needlessly complex curb stomp spot. The Legends trio felt lame to me but I was relieved that the big moment Meltzer teased was that and not a New Day breakup. Austin’s been hitting the Double IPAs too hard, but I like that he let Rusev beat on him for a while for at least something of a rub. I really didn't mind the Xavier beatdown: they're comedy heels and it worked in the moment better than a lot of Austin semi-burials have in the past.

 

92) Brock Lesnar vs. Dean Ambrose [No Holds Barred] (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Underwhelming. Brock's Germans were on point, but Kendo sticks, fire extinguishers, and a chainsaw in a Lesnar match felt really lame and out of place. Saxton and JBL's commentary was notably bad during the quiet moments here. That said, I liked a lot about Ambrose's performance: he was fun in his reactions. I even liked the cheap nut shot. Whole thing felt like a huge waste of Lesnar in a year where he could have main evented with Reigns. No Wyatts appearance either. They booked nothing more than "Jon Moxley takes a Jon Moxley beating" and tried to get out of there without thinking too hard.

 

14) Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Becky Lynch [inaugural Women’s Title Triple Threat] (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

This match has had a better build on TV than anything else on the show thus far, and proved to be MOTN. Haters will call it "rehearsed", as if that's not true of 90% of all Mania matches. Sasha's tributes to Eddy were great. Killer Frog Splash. Charlotte looked awkward in two different armbars, but that's the only petty crit I had with this. Her moonsault was awesome. Loved Lynch dragging Banks to the ropes to save the match, only to have Flair later mirror it with his interference. Didn't really mind the finish as it felt like true heel heat, but this was Sasha's night to win and it won't mean as much at like, Extreme Rules or whatever.

 

107) Undertaker vs. Shane McMahon [Hell in a Cell] (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Triangle Chokes were weird and terrible. Should have guessed from Shane’s training montages that this would be fake MMA early. So much laughably bad matwork here. So many audibly called spots. Taker completely gassed out five minutes in. Like AJ-Jericho, Taker had to behave like an idiot to put over the idea of Shane outsmarting him.

 

This improved once they started throwing monitors at each other’s heads and going through tables. People on Twitter were joking that you’ll ge get to see this match again at Mania 50, and that feels disappointingly possible. Shane’s dive was amazing in its own way. Really happy he didn’t kill himself, even if he killed kayfabe. I was laughing out loud at the finish in disbelief. Wow. The pre-show panel laughing and dancing to the Flo Rida song of death immediately after that match was like something out of Benny Hill.

 

103) Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Remember two hours ago when I said this show was exceeding low expectations?

 

118) The Rock vs. Erick Rowan (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

Goddamn I can't stop laughing. Between a flamethrower, "Thunderstruck" cheerleaders, and the Freebirds speech I've gotten so many great LOLs this weekend. Rock is either the lamest cool guy who ever lived or the coolest lame guy who ever lived. And the weird thing is: no one hated that segment more than Cena. That segment was also this evening's nadir of Vince-talking-through-puppet-Cole on commentary. "Ya gotta give 'em the five knuckle shuffle!” Remember three and a half hours ago when I said that I didn't get people who still complain about the commentary?

 

RIP

Husky "Bray Wyatt" Harris

2010 - 2016

 

100) Triple H vs. Roman Reigns [WWE Heavyweight Title] (Wrestlemania 32, 4/3)

If nothing else, this show has given me newfound understanding and respect for our Vietnam veterans. "This is the End... my only friend, the End... weird scenes inside the goldmine…” It isn't just that I don't know what this is. It's that I don't know who I am anymore upon seeing it. We're one Hogan cameo away from putting this over the top. This close. This. Close. Let this be remembered as that time where Banks, Charlotte, and Lynch stole the show and had MOTN on a Wrestlemania. Significant story coming out of this show that isn't getting enough play (as it happened early on): the successful burial of AJ Styles in under three months. What's the biggest change coming out of the largest and most profitable Mania of all time? Zack Ryder: Intercontinental Champion.

[Parties]

37) Negro Casas/Blue Panther vs. Solar/Black Terry (LLE, 2/28)
The +LuchaTV YouTube channel tends to be tons of short interview clips that aren’t exciting, but it seems like they’re starting to put up some interesting full-length matches. Lucha Libre Elite being a CMLL/IWRG hybrid company that favors maestros and puts them on hot shows at Arena Mexico is maybe the most exciting thing in wrestling right now. Kind of sad to see Panther and Solar stumbling early, but it was not because their minds didn’t know what to do, but rather because their knees are shot to hell and they can’t move on the mat as fast as they once could. The botch of Solar tripping off the top rope was a bit sad. But once the DDP Yoga kicks in they start doing great holds and cool flying armscissors. Terry-Casas is good even if Casas wants to work harder and faster than Terry, but I’m not sure there’s anyone in the business right now who wouldn’t look inferior to Casas while in the ring with him.

There’s a really smart veteran spot that I only noticed for the first time: when Casas kicks out of a Terry pin, he puts his hand near Terry’s face and pushes off at the moment of the kick-out. Aside from looking cool, it also seems like a smart way to let your opponent know when to break the pin. Recent Terry has been a little sad even when he’s been good: the mustache makes him look ten years older, and his health looks to be deteriorating as he gains weight and seems to be gasping for air while working Casas. But once they start trading strikes, he looks like his old self again, and Terry bleeding hardway off a Casas headbutt was wild. I actually thought the Casas-Solar slap exchanges were better than the stuff with Terry, and their whole stretch at the end was cool even if it felt at times like Casas working with three crash test dummies.

17) Blue Panther/Guerrero Maya, Jr./Rey Cometa vs. Hechicero/Kraneo/Ripper (CMLL, 4/1)
The opening matwork isn’t flawless, but it’s the best Panther’s looked in a while and he clearly wanted to go for it with Hechicero in doing some elaborate spots. Kemonito gets a nice splash on Kraneo, and we get a sweet tilt-a-whirl headscissors from Maya to Ripper (who comes out of this looking like an awesome act that I want to check out more). This is one of those lucha trios matches that are a pleasure to watch and really well executed even though you’ll never remember anything about it a year from now, which is a big part of why I’m keeping this exhaustive year-in-review list. The technico-rudo dynamics are spot-on, and I highly recommend this to anyone who liked the Shield/Wyatts/Bryan trios matches of 2013. You even have Kraneo in the Kane role.

111) Los Terrible Cerebros vs. Los Oficiales (IWRG, 4/6)
Five years ago this would have been a dream match, now it’s pretty weak. Rudos beating on faces the whole match; some interesting “country whipping” belt shots and not much else. I love everyone in this match and even I’ll say this wasn’t at all compelling, even with the verite You Are There camerawork. Dull and meandering: modern IWRG can be frustrating in that great workers phone it in some nights and others look better than ever.

[Parties]

5) Roman Reigns vs. AJ Styles (Payback, 5/1)

Byron making his best point in a while: “Who’d have thought a month ago we’d even be seeing this match?” Good slow burn at the start where Styles is a nuisance kicking Reigns in the back of the knee, working long head-and-wristlocks. Big momentum shift came with Reigns’ lariat, leading to him doing the de facto heel control segment. The table/countout/restart were all just a means toward getting to a place where they’re both selling fatigue. The dual McMahon appearances were cheesy. Yet like Brock-Reigns, they manage to have the company’s best possible match in a scenario with lots of over-the-top booking. Incredible flight from Styles. Even Anderson and Gallows, who less than three months ago on the Feb NJ show looked like my least favorite act in the business, were now redeemed. The actual finish is a bit video game for me, but still so well done that you have to give it to them just for pulling it off so naturally.

For the second year in a row, Reigns has a true MOTY in the spring with an opponent who happens to be the hottest act in the business. With Brock it was a war: this was a power vs. speed NBA playoff - who can make the next shot at the buzzer - and he excelled at both. If it takes the public time as it did with Cena for them to get how good Roman is, it may take less time. Reigns continues to veer into a heelish or at least rogue character. Where Cena was asked to be Superman in a Batman world, Reigns is Khal Drogo.

After seeing this out of Styles I was reminded of a common GWE question, “Was so-and-so ever bad at any point in their career?” Like how Rey is pretty much flawless for 20+ years unless you hate the Filthy Animals stuff. I’m hard pressed to name a bad Styles performance. There were almost certainly many bad Styles matches in TNA, but when has he ever sucked? Or not looked like he was working hard. He’s a guy who I never would have thought a top 100 contender until this year. He’s having maybe the most interesting career of anyone in wrestling outside of Danielson for the last what, 10 years? Maybe even moreso than Danielson, if he goes far in WWE and has the major Japan run in his portfolio as well, plus Europe and Mexico. Dude is now a WWE main eventer. There’s not much more in this era that he could need to accomplish.

[Parties]

92) Hiroshi Fukuda vs. Terry Boy [Hardcore Match] (BASARA, 4/14)
I’ve been out of this crew’s loop for a while, but Fukuda coming out with really long hair in an American flag jumpsuit while waving an actual giant American flag that he then uses to hit ring boys with cheap shots is a pretty killer way to start a match. Match itself reminded me that I watched hundreds if not thousands of Japanese indie matches between say 2005 and 2010. Teioh was in a bunch of them as he works everywhere. Then at a certain point I just stopped, as it so much of it felt joylessly repetitive and half-formed: perennial mid carders going through the motions in front of dead crowds. Each guy had their same crowd brawls, same shtick, same match structure, same hulk-ups every match. You could predict what any given NOAH match would be, as was the case with DG, DDT, Z1, and others. The strikes in this are pretty darn bad: even with Funk/Murdoch tribute spots and a lot of blood, there’s no drama at all. But this does heat up at the very end, with a really cool finish that makes this feel like a smart usage of “hardcore” rules. You do get the sense throughout that these guys are trying to have something resembling a gritty lucha brawl, and even if it never really gets there, it still feels kind of novel if nothing else, esp. with Fukuda having maybe the greatest look in pro wrestling today.

16) Negro Casas vs. Hechicero (Monterrey, 4/24)
Great leg locks on the mat from Casas. Hechicero powering out of the arm-bar was cool. Hechicero’s assault in the third fall - huge Muscle Buster, moonsault, the wheelbarrows - all looked stellar.

68) Dalton Castle vs. ACH vs. Roderick Strong vs. Adam Page (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Castle’s entrance may have been the highlight. Strong’s chops were good. Castle’s suplexes and power moves were really cool too, he looked to be killing dudes with those forearms. The big tope spot was awesome and props to Page for flipping in and lariat ACH in the process. Really nice finish as well.

108) Jushin Liger/Cheeseburger vs. The Addiction (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Loved the faces’ teamwork here. Finish was effectively creepy, I guess? Not a great or even particularly good match as the heels are pretty lame in their offense and mannerisms. The feud over who has the best Meltzer Driver is the very sort of thing Baron Corbin pledges to erase from our lives. Kind of a nothing bout.

94) War Machine vs. The Briscoes (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Fighting spirit moments here didn’t work for me. Well worked match but this being for the 9th title run for the Briscoes in ROH feels like the same old song. Everyone in this was fine and worked hard, but for me it lacked much drama or structure: I don’t know what story they were trying to tell beyond 2.9 counts and War Machine looking for their first win over the Briscoes.

65) Tetsuya Naito vs. Kyle O’Reilly (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Liked the Regalplex and the finish. My feed was quite bad during this, but what I saw looked solid.

122) Hiroshi Tanahashi/Michael Elgin vs. Kazuchita Okada/Moose (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Really weak looking neckbreajer from Okada to Tanahashi. Aside from the second rope senton I didn’t much like their stuff. Elgin was bland as ever and Moose works too small for a guy so big. He’s flying around for everyone when he could been the grounding powerhouse to the other indulgence on display.

48) Tomohiro Ishii vs. Bobby Fish [TV Title] (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Loved the brainbuster, big lariats and suplexes from Ishii. Fish sold well throughout and told a story of challenger having to take a beating to stand a chance. Good match.

88) Kushida/Matt Sydal/The MCMGs vs.The Young Bucks/Tama Tonga/Tunga Loa (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Bucks have a certain charm at times even if their work isn’t superb. Faces were all interchangeable, though I think Kushida’s pretty likable in his work and character. Match was the usual Bucks overkill, and probably on the low end of their recent ROH work even with some nice dives and an amusing subplot in their super kick counter.

73) Jay Lethal vs. Colt Cabana [ROH World Title] (ROH Global Wars, 5/8)
Lethal’s a better promo than Cabana. Lethal’s entrance theme and video is totally weird but kind of effective. Match of the Night until the finish, which was worse than nearly anything WWE’s done this year. Like, some part of me thinks this sucked more than Taker-Shane, in that I had a more visceral negative reaction to just turn this off than to the unintentional comedy of Mania. Thought Lethal and Colt both looked very good. I suspect this is building to some kind of Wargames match where ROH has to defend against the invaders.

[Parties]

45) Cibernético, Mephisto, Rey Escorpión vs Ángel de Oro, Máscara Dorada, Volador Jr. (CMLL Guerreros del Ring, 4/28)
As you might guess, highlight here was Escorpion. He works on the mat with Oro and serves as a great base to all three. CMLL is basically the all-time greatest promotion for easily watchable fifteen minute tags. Even if you’ve seen hundreds of lucha trios this good, everyone’s entertaining and it’s a nice mix of genuinely impressive high flying and fast chain wrestling.

114) Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas vs. The Vaudevillains (Smackdown, 5/5)
I now watch matches like this the way I assume the DVDVR crew were watching The Pro in 1997, looking for gold in situations where undercarders would accidentally be allowed to have a good match on TV. Axel is a sad bro whose cargo shorts feel like his most apt gimmick yet. Dallas is a guy I really loved during his debut year on the main roster, but the singlet doesn’t work. Vaudevillians are a horrible gimmick, but they showed some decent teamwork in this two minute match.

52) Charlotte/Emma vs. Natalya/Becky Lynch (Smackdown, 5/5)
Emma-Becky should be the title feud, but people with accents can’t draw, so that’s that. Emma ruled doing Regal pins, smashing Natalya’s face into the mat at top speed, and bumping big for Becky’s hot tag. Even Charlotte was a good heel here, and you can see that Vince has really changed his tune on playing to the crowd. I think all four women acknowledge the audience at some point here. The finish with Emma and Natalya was outstanding. I plan to do some kind of mid-year top 50 workers list, and it’s possible that both Emma and Lynch end up on it.

100) Rusev vs. Zack Ryder (Smackdown, 5/5)
These two have no chemistry at all, and it’s pretty much all Ryder’s fault. His offense is only slightly less ridiculous than his overselling for everything. He’s like a taller, bulkier, far less agile Ziggler. Rusev hits an amazing scoop suplex where he lifts Ryder from the floor up over his head in one quick motion, reminding you that this guy used to be the best act in the company. The new facet of Lana’s continuing punishment is that she now has to dress like Joan Rivers. Russell gets a goose egg on his forehead off a ref bump: Lana scolds Ryder post-match for potato-ing her man. Kalisto’s recent gimmick as tiny babyface who jumps heels from behind, beats them up with cheap shots, then scurries away continues.

42) The Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows (Smackdown, 5/5)
Really good match with a twist halfway through that makes it better. Anderson and Gallows still aren’t great, but they’re much improved, and the Reigns-Styles exchanges here look like the hottest thing in wrestling. Even the Usos seem to be getting a good rub off this feud as they were being booed just weeks ago against the Dudleys.

[Parties]

62) Shayna Bazler vs. Colleen Schneider (PREMIER XII, 3/6)
Call it ShEvolve. This is billed as Schneider’s first ever pro wres match, and if that’s the case she may prove a genuine prodigy in the vein of Matt Riddle. Odd opening in that Bazler was throwing really fake kicks that I guess you could argue are sort of how you’d pull them in a shoot if retreating in defense, but here it just ended up looking awkward. Throughout I was surprised that Schneider was way better here than the Billy Robinson-trained Bazler. Their grappling is much better than their stand-up in that they can roll very quickly on the mat together and pull off a lot of dynamic escapes in and out of armdrags. Good ankle lock from Bazler, but she still looks weird in there. Schneider’s even good at selling, which I would not have guessed. This has kind of a slow-then-sudden finish, but they told a good story and it felt pretty true to the legitmacy vibe they were seeking, even if I’d recommend these two watch more BattlARTS than Pancrase if shoot style is their future. Certainly not the best match you’ll see this year, but definitely one of the most interesting, especially if you’re a Horsewomen fan and watched the Rousey-Tate season of TUF.

[Parties]

76) Tortuga Ninjas vs Mariachi Locos [Mexico State Trios Championship] (IWRG, 5/1)
Three guys doing their bootleg Ninja Turtles gimmick against three heel champs who’ve recently decided to work a faux-babyface Mariachi gimmick is everything pro wrestling should be. Mariachi Locos are Hijo del Diablo (the love child of Jake Roberts and Manny Fernandez) Diablo Jr., and Imposible. This is worked as a legit lucha title match, where everyone shakes hands and keeps things on the up and up. Two-thirds of the IWRG roster now wear the exact same black shirt, long black tights, and plain black mask, but Diablo Jr. is the one who wears a wifebeater and works more singles matches. Like if you told me this team and Los Panteras are saving money together by sharing one set of gear, I'd buy it. This opens with some awesome matwork from Leonardo (“Leo” as he’s known south of the border) and Imposible. Lightning fast and I love the little stuff that Leo’s doing, like wag his finger Dusty Rhodes-style to indicate he’s not tapping. Raphael (“Rafy”) seems to be hitting the pizza harder than his cohorts these days, but is still pretty swift on the mat and basically stays on top of an intricate wrist-lock for several minutes. Michelangelo (“Mike”) looks like the worst worker of the three Turtles based on his loose, gaga approach to submissions, but what more can we expect from a party dude? There’s one really funny-bad moment here where Hijo del Diablo taps to an armbar, but is then caught on camera not once but three times, sticking his tongue out in a goofy manner, not selling anything, then corpsing when the ref comes over to massage his shoulder. Totally exposing in this weird way where you don’t get why they keep repeatedly putting the camera back on him in close-up. Matwork and flying are not Hijo’s strong suits, so this picks up in the tercera when it breaks down into a tornado brawl. Eventually you get big dives, including an incredible Diablo Jr. tope con hilo.

101) Diablo Jr. vs. Leo [intercontinental Welterweight Title Quarterfinal] (IWRG, 4/24)
Here’s how many titles there are in Mexico: this is billed as the quarterfinal of a tournament to crown an Intercontinental Welterweight Title seemingly recognized only by IWRG. A week later these guys fight for the Mexican State Trios Titles, not to be confused with Mexico the country or the Mexican State Welterweight Title or the Western States Heritage Mexican Title. These are the two best workers from the trios discussed above having a six minute singles match. I like how fast this moves, with almost a Beat the Clock element of both guys going for a lot of pins and trying to hit the deathblow ASAP. It suffers a bit from attending the Paul Levesque School of Irish Whips, but everything they hit is stiff, including a whiplashed spinning neckbreaker for the finish.

[Parties]

103) Rusev vs. Sin Cara (Smackdown, 5/12)
Competitive squash. On commentary Kalisto keeps referring to how angry Rusev is, which I guess is sort of a Camron-O’Reilly “U mad doggy” approach. Kalisto’s corny, but as an uber-earnest babyface I can see why they think he has some promise. Mauro is pretty amazing at making this into something during play-by-play. Rusev looked solid, but it’s brutal to see where he is now vs. two years ago for having the audacity to love his fiancé. Marginally better than the prior week’s Rusev SD squash of Zack Ryder, so there is that. Hopefully this just leads to a weekly run where he squashes a new guy on this show every week until he finally works his way up to Lesnar or whatever.

112) Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke (Smackdown, 5/12)
Lynch is getting really over based off this crowd reaction, and I like that she has developed signature babyface offense and hulk-ups that she gets to rally around here. Way too short to be anything as in typical WWE fashion they kind of keep hitting the same note over and over again with these characters in the abrupt finish, but Lynch’s case for being a top 50-100 worker in the world right now continues. She’s been an absolute workhorse this year with a match or two on TV every week.

119) Kofi Kingston vs. Aiden English (Smackdown, 5/12)
Two guys who at times have each sucked in the past having a good little match. Kofi has genuine babyface fire and good backup from E and Woods in this gimmick, while English has managed to develop a believable man’s man asskicker gimmick despite having a 98-pound noodle body. This even has distraction stuff that doesn’t feel forced. Too short to be exceptional, but perfectly solid stuff.

85) The Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows (Smackdown. 5/12)
Third time they’ve run this match in a week if you count the RAW trios: this started mediocre but improved a lot. Initially it felt like a time where a match suffered from Kevin Dunn editing, as everything’s an abrupt zoom in that looks like shit and kills the flow of the match. Gallows’ strikes are weirdly bad for a guy who used to be a hoss killer and now looks like a dad gardening out there. Really neither Anderson nor Gallows are up to the current standard of WWE workers right now, but once they got on offense and could work double-team stuff, this got better. Strong Usos comeback too.

56) Cesaro/Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens/The Miz (Smackdown, 5/12)
Best WWE match of the week, and the best variation we’ve seen of the round robin stuff these four have done all month. Huge tope con hilo (or “toupee con hero” as Lawler calls it) from Zayn here. Miz and Owens bickering and later Owens chastising Byron Saxton is actually entertaining rather than forced. I also dug that Miz is now adding a bunch of neck breakers and other similar stuff into his arsenal as a means of setting up for the Skull Crushing Finale, which tends to be an otherwise weak finisher. Owens’ frog splash and Zayn’s Helluva Kick were on point too.

[Parties]

102) Atlantis vs. L.A. Park (LLE, 5/4)
Disappointing that this only goes like seven minutes, but Liga Elite’s a weird promotion. Huge waste of a rare Park sighting for that reason, but what you do get is often excellent. Gigantic tope from Atlantis that Park sells like a gunshot, while minutes later Atlantis fails to return the favor by not selling Park’s at all. Park kicking the ref into the ropes to knock Atlantis off the top was outstanding. Even when this sucks, it’s still compelling, if that makes sense. And suck it does at times. Hopefully we get more week to week Park, even in these quick shots.

29) Pentagon Jr. vs. Fenix (AAW, 5/6)
This was truly fantastic, and a match made better by being a fan cam as it gives you the scale and incredible agility of Fenix’s dives and Pentagon’s mix of stiff matwork and power offense. You also get Pentagon wearing a fan’s baseball hat for a while, viciously loud chops, and tons of stunningly crazy moves. This is pretty short, but unlike the Park-Atlantis match this feels like a complete experience rather than an abrupt end. A celebration of what wrestling can look like when Kevin Dunn isn’t directing.

[Parties]

Added: 9) Virus vs. Hechicero (Lucha Memes, 5/15)
This is pretty much the lucha dream match of the moment, and Hechicero is making a strong case for WOTY by going on this tear of having several top-shelf matches each month in taped tags and singles. First: this match happened on Sunday afternoon and I’m watching it now. Incredible. Second: remember how I’ve been annoyingly talking for months on this board about how the way matches are filmed is way more important than people acknowledge? Watch this and see what a difference it makes. You are in the ring with these guys like it’s the first thirty minutes of Saving Private Ryan. The tightness of the holds. The fluidity of the matwork. The strength needed to move like that on said mat. The speed of the rope running and Virus’ amazing counters out of submissions.

 

There’s also an incredible sense to this where you get the sense these guys are pulling out wild stuff that they can only do with each other (or an elite few at this level). The flying in and out of intricate pins feels like a lost art being rediscovered here. Fantastic finish that shows the logic of the limb work being done throughout. If this was five to ten minutes longer, it could be MOTY. As is, it might be the best uncut eleven and a half minutes of wrestling this year.

[Parties]

108) Shinsuke Nakamura/Austin Aries vs. Blake & Murphy (NXT, 5/18)
Two minute squash that was good while it lasted. This transitioned into a really bad Bailey promo, an Asuka promo video set to a horrible Evanescence-style track, and a different really bad promo from No Way Jose. Highlight of the match was Nakamura’s theme music, even if it’s a bit too similar to Balor’s,

129) Carmella vs. Peyton Royce (NXT, 5/18)
Carm has a charisma wherein even as she’s probably trying too hard, I find the act endearing. Peyton Royce’s character appears to be that she wears too much makeup and holds a flower during her entrance that she smells and chews upon as the “Venus Fly Trap” of NXT. Graves quickly chimes in to in so many words explain, “Look, she’s doing a Poison Ivy gimmick.” Royce was surprisingly good here, with smart heel offense and a really well done Three Amigos suplex series into a bridge.

131) Tommaso Ciampa/Johnny Gargano vs. Rob Ryzin/Danny Birch (NXT, 5/18)
Ciampa may end up on the low-end of the Inaugural Viaje del Parties Mid-Year Top 50 Workers list, and a big part of it is his tremendous consistency live in EVOLVE, on other taped indies, and here as an almost weekly workhorse in NXT. Where Gargano does a series of forced arm drags, Ciampa punches opponents in the teeth and chops the hell out of chests. He’s gone from being a guy I thought was a total scrub to a bonafide “killer”, even if his selling is hit-or-miss.

33) Bailey vs. Nia Jax (NXT, 5/18)
Meltzer deemed this to be nothing, so I can only assume he was preoccupied fixing the antenna on his cell phone. This was shockingly good if imbalanced in its goodness, and felt like a return to form for Bailey after the questionable Asuka match, notable for her truly awesome selling throughout. Great opening as Bailey’s showing tons of speed and fire trying to outpace Jax, until she gets stopped by some pretty vicious slams and throws. Early on this largely worked like Sting-Vader, which is pretty much the model for how to work this type of matchup, until it later becomes more like Matt Hardy-Mark Henry. There is a turnbuckle bump in this that puts any Bret Hart ever took to shame. This even has a tremendously worked sleeper hold spot. Like, a genuinely great sleeper that makes you believe in the sleeper again. Bailey’s comebacks are a true thrill and technically superb. Of Jax you can say that she’s a bit slow here, but I think it’s slow in a very effective One Man Gang type of way, which feels fresh and different amidst so many big dudes who nowadays work like small dudes. The only glaring critique you can make of her is that she’s clearly still hesitant about taking bumps, so you have sort of awkward moments where she’s supposed to take some fatal spill to the floor but instead gingerly braces herself on all fours. But the end to this is satisfying, and tells a pretty cool story.

[Parties]

105) Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens (Smackdown, 5/19)
Initially it felt like the problem with this pairing is that Owens isn’t really capable of working Cesaro’s match, so Cesaro always ends up working his. Which leads to them doing the same routine they did at Summerslam, and every time they worked before or after that. But this goes long enough that they do take it up a notch: you see Owens as desperate cheating heel getting knocked around and looking for shortcuts, and you get Cesaro as technical marvel doing gigantic gut wrench suplexes and springboard uppercuts. Plus they do some good stuff in countering each other’s big spots and jaw-jacking with the Miz and Zayn at ringside. Really horrible finish that you can both see coming away and is so lazily executed that it’s kind of amazing people actually book this show.

138) Dana Brooke vs. Paige (Smackdown, 5/19)
Holy hell is Paige getting buried right now. Someone mad about her hooking up with Del Rio? She does a two minute loss here that would typically be reserved for a jobber, but there are only four babyface women on the roster right now and she happens to be the lowest of them right now. Brooke actually looked quite good here with some aggressive power moves and a sense of genuinely adept heel mannerisms.

126) Sheamus vs. Dolph Ziggler (Smackdown, 5/19)
Remember when Sheamus was champ six months ago? Remember when these two had a long feud right at this time last year, including a Kiss Me Arse match at Extreme Rules? I had completely forgotten, until looking it up just now because I was curious how many completely forgettable singles matches these guys must have had. Anyway, this was fine. I love seeing Sheamus lariat and clobber dudes, and while at times these guys look visibly depressed to even be doing this, they do get the crowd going and make this into something by journey’s end.

139) The New Day/Big Cass vs. The Vaudevillians/The Dudley Boyz (Smackdown, 5/19)
I love multi-man tags, but this really tests that premise. That said, pretty much everyone’s good here. Woods again proves as he did at Mania that he’s a very good FIP. Kingston’s barely in the match. Cass is the powerhouse powder keg in wait on the apron. Simon Gotch and Aiden English are more competent than people think. D-Von stays out of the way, and Bubba shows a more cartoonish old man version of his loud-mouth peaks in ECW and TNA. I wouldn’t even call this a good match so much as a competent one, but given some of the guys in the ring, low expectations here walk tall.

108) Roman Reigns vs. Luke Gallows (Smackdown, 5/19)
While this isn’t as phenomenal as I want it to be, it is what I want it to be in principle: stiff strikes and a juggernaut vibe. The fisticuffs are fun, but this has too many of the bad hallmarks you’ve seen in other matches on this very show: ridiculous distractions, goofy brawling, pointless nearfalls, an over reliance on signature moves and forced tropes. One of the weirdest things about the WWE agents (or at least them in relation to Vince) is that they end up booking such similar matches within the same show. This entire episode felt like another SD lame duck show. Smackdown in fact tends to be at its worst on go-home PPV weeks.

[Tim Evans]

Parties, Have you watched the Dandy/Satanico 6 man from Monterrey that was posted this past week. I think you will like it.

[Parties]

46) Negro Casas vs. Rush (Elite, 5/4)
Doing a six minute version of this match is deranged, but “don’t be sad that it’s over, appreciate that it happened” as the old lady saying goes. Rush is a true beast here, steamrolling Casas early and basically working the way I wish Roman Reigns would: roaring at the crowd, spitting at announcers until they throw drinks at him, stomping mudholes, and beating up midgets in bird costumes. Casas responds with fiery comebacks. I won’t talk about everything that happens here, but know that it’s tons of chaotic fun and that Casas at some point ends up covered in some kind of weird powdery silver paint. Locura!

51) Drew Galloway/Johnny Gargano vs. Premier Athlete Brand (EVOLVE 58, 4/1)
At first I thought this felt like I’d seen this matchup too often, but I also don’t much like the Premier breakup angle or Gargano, so the dosage of both on recent EVOLVE shows has been too high pour moi. That said, the wrestling here is night and day to much else happening in the States right now, and this was a hugely refreshing upgrade from all the bad WWE TV I’ve watched this month. For storyline purposes this is kind of a squash, but a really entertaining match in which even as the heels bumble, they still look like talented contenders (albeit ones who are getting outplayed by the superior champs). This was also maybe the best Gargano’s ever looked to me. Genuine charisma, really on point in his flying and highspots, working at a fast pace while maintaining good composure. Lots of cool moves and the much heralded Dylan appearance were lots of fun.

22) Timothy Thatcher vs. Matt Riddle [EVOLVE Title] (EVOLVE 58, 4/1)
Thatcher’s felt like a total afterthought in this company all year, but this was strong stuff. This is kind of the RINGS version of Evolve’s shoot style, as they’re on the mat almost the whole time and the defense is some of the more interesting stuff that happens. I’d like to see them focus a little more on the drama of good escapes rather than just releasing holds at arbitrary moments, but this Riddle’s selling was tremendous and I give Thatcher props for working his match to re-educate crowds, such that a leg lock becomes vicious death. I enjoyed Lenny Leonard on commentary saying that Riddle had more experience on the mat than Conor McGregor and thus wouldn’t give up his back in the same fashion. The Fisherman Buster from Riddle here makes you want to see what he could do as stoner time traveler to 90s All Japan. I liked the finish but wish it had been more decisive, but perhaps that’s simply savvy booking: get fans to crave the rematch.

55) Fred Yehi vs. Marty Scuril (EVOLVE 58, 4/1)
We all want Yehi to be pushed hard, but it feels like they’re doing the right thing in making him this Kobashi figure who keeps looking elite in defeat. Where there’s no wasted motion with Yehi (seemingly transitioning kicks into rollups into escapes into grappling), Scuril (like many of the Rev Pro guys) is all wasted motion: doing showy leaps around the ring and useless handstands for the purpose of getting off one superkick to a prone opponent directly in front of him. Once Yehi reclaims control with his signature rapid stomps spot and some awesome suplexes, I’m back in. Good finish as they try to injure each other’s wrists and fingers.

27) Sami Callahan vs. Ethan Page (EVOLVE 58, 4/1)
Wow was this good. Really physical stuff, and probably as good as Page has ever looked to me. He seems to be getting stronger with his power offense, hitting a lot of power bomb variations and backbreakers that make him into something unique in the promotion. This was likewise vintage Callahan: a mix of feral, gross, and technically on point, as he manages to abuse Page while also giving him a lot in return. The finishing stretch is violent and really competitive, as it feels like either guy could hit the deathblow at any moment. Impressive.

59) Ricochet vs. TJP (EVOLVE 58, 4/1)
Liked this even if the usual Ricochet gimmickry still feels like overkill. Perkins as cheating heel and submission specialist grounding the high flyer was good stuff. Finish felt smart and well executed, telling a cool and unpredictable story.

131) Zack Sabre, Jr. vs. Will Ospreay [best in the World Challenge Series] (EVOLVE 58, 4/1)
It’s weird to me that on commentary they keep calling this World of Sport-style action. Ricochet and TJP was more like WoS than this was: these dudes are just British. I was zoning out watching this and had to keep rewinding to correct my boredom with it. Sabre tries, but I don’t buy him as elite and having him do a Best in the World series feels like if you had like, Phil Lafon do one of these in 1991. It’s fine, but it’s a gimmick more than it is reality. I liked the section of Sabre pretzeling Ospreay, but in the inevitable comeback, Sabre has to stand and wait like a goof for Ospreay to hit over-the-top flippy kicks and it all feels contrived. Sabre with a bad triangle choke that the crowd adores. “This is awesome” chants follow. Mamma mia.

11) Drew Gulak/Tracy Williams vs. Chris Hero/Tommy End (EVOLVE 58, 4/1)
Hero has been the great abuser of almost everyone this year, but he seems to have particular distain for Williams, which establishes a good ace heel/young lion vibe. End gives him the same with the Peter Aerts business in the corner. Williams’ comeback is great to see as you can understand how Hero is getting the kid over. Gulak’s hot tag and the Catch Point double-team that follows is a lot of fun as well: you get watching this why they won the titles on this weekend. So much entertaining stuff throughout: all of Hero’s striking is great, and the vibe of this - much like the Hero/End matches in the tag title tournament - feel in step with the best Japanese tags of the 80s and 90s: smart interference, team strategy, and a sense that you’re watching a test of wills and a bunch of violent dudes clashing together. The tornado third act to this felt a bit hazy, but the out-of-nowhere finish was well done.