GSR

Ricky Morton says that all week he and Robert have been thinking about what they did to Tammy Fytch last week and it’s not really the way you should treat a lady. To make up for it they’ve bought this present for her (they have a large box which is all wrapped up with them) and he knows that she probably doesn’t want to come out and collect it after what did happen, but they’ll leave it here for her just in case she does . Tammy Fytch us out with Brian Lee and Chris Candido and Primetime has now dyed his hair brown for the Undertaker angle in the WWF. Tammy is rather excited as there’s nothing she loves more than receiving presents and believes that the Rock & Roll Express must have come to their senses. They must have realised how much they do actually love her and what a wonderful girl she is! She thinks it might be a television or a microwave, but Candido and Lee tell her to be careful after what they did to her last week. As Fytch starts to open it, Bambi pops out of the box, grabs Tammy and starts shaking her (you would have thought she would have learned her lesson after last week!). Lee and Candido free her from Bambi’s grasp before the Rock & Roll Express are out to make sure that they don’t attack her. Morton says that every time they wrestle Chris Candido and Brian Lee it seems like Tammy Fytch sticks her nose in the ring. If she wants to get in the ring so bad, now that they’ve got Bambi in their corner, they’re going to have themselves some six person tags.

Jim Ross says that in recent weeks Smoky Mountain Wrestling have received a number of complaints from the TV stations that air the broadcasts, the fans and even from the Knoxville chapter of the NAACP, and as a result from now on all of their interviews will have a disclaimer. The television stations and Smoky Mountain are not going to be responsible for what they’re saying and if they go over the line they will be censored. New Jack says every time you get one of ‘them’ that want to be outspoken you silence them. You silenced Martin Luther King, you silenced Medgar Evers and you’re even trying to silence Arsenio Hall, but he’s going to be here until he feels like leaving. He doesn’t care about these hillbillies not liking him or putting a censor on what he says or does because he’s been censored all his life. He wants to send a message to the NAACP, a bunch of trained Negros in a cage who you tell to jump and they say ‘how high?’ You don’t tell New Jack how high to jump as he’ll tell you to drop dead. He’s going to do what he wants to do, he’s not selling out to anyone and if you don’t like him get your ass in the ring and he’ll beat you like he owns you. Jim Ross asks New Jack what their objective is in SMW, and he says that everywhere they’ve ever been they’ve beaten people until they are tired of beating them. Then one day someone said that they know someone who they haven’t beaten yet, the Rock & Roll Express. He has beaten brothers that have been in jail for murder, beaten brothers that have been in jail for molesting their own children and beaten brothers that have been in jail for stealing cars. The Rock & Roll Express may have beaten all these top teams in wrestling but they’ve never been in a fight, and until those rednecks get in the ring with him he doesn’t consider them top dogs. They’re going to have to survive the whipping that the Gangstas are going to give them and the SMW fans, television producers and NAACP sell outs can kiss his black ass. This feels so fresh and completely unlike anything else that’s gone before. I said it previously, but New Jack projects such an aura of danger and believability in these promos. Looking forward to hearing much, much more from him.

I don't know how many people would have watched it for this, but he had a match with Rocco on WOS that I really enjoyed in the early 80s (and I'm not someone who is high on Rocco).

And this was my primary reason for dropping out of the project, that some of us 'weren't deemed worth enough' to contribute in this process. Nice to see Cortez do well(ish); he would've been third on my WOS guys.

'It’s okay, Jake the Snake is still your champion, Smoky Mountain can be proud one more day and in him there’s a man parents can tell their children to look up to.' A lot of people are talking a lot of garbage about him at the moment so he needs to address a few things. He tells the Dirty White Boy that he did him a favour, that it was the humane thing to do, to put the Dirty White Girl out of her misery the way he did. The White Boy is a lucky man, ‘the fortunate son’ as it could have been him, he should thank the Dirty White Girl and not worry about her forgiving him. Bob Caudle is starting to wonder if there is such a thing as justice as what happened just now was completely uncalled for and a travesty as Jake Roberts had no business being out there (the Dirty White Boy was wrestling Kendo the Samurai when Jake came down to ringside and absolutely leathered the White Boy with the title belt laying him out and costing him the match via count out). The Dirty White Boy says that his momma told him a long time ago that one of these days he’s going to have to face the devil and maybe this is his time? He goes home at night and wonders whether his dog and wife still think that he’s the man he used to be? Is he still the man she married? He just wants to be able to walk down the road with his wife beside him, her head held high proud of him. He doesn’t want her to be scared in public, afraid to be seen with him to where she has to say ‘my husband’s a loser’. He tells Jake that nobody in his family is going to be ashamed of him and from this day forth his family is going to walk beside him with their heads held high, because if he doesn’t take him out, he’ll quit. I think the White Boy upped Jake in this one with those quiet, hushed tones again.

Bob & Steve & Scott Armstrong are in the dressing room and Bob says that everybody is talking about this year’s Summerblast tour. It’s going to be real special to the Armstrong family as the question has arisen who is the most famous family in wrestling, who’s the family that can get it done? Everyone knows that the Funk brothers are the only brothers to have held the NWA World Championship at different times, but you could say it’s like the Hatfield’s and the McCoy’s. Dory Funk has tried to cripple him but he’s still standing and the Armstrong’s are still here. By the time his boys were two year’s old he was giving them bodyslams, they’re used to punishment and know how to take it. In their home town the question of who is the most famous family in wrestling will be answered, his boys maybe younger and may not have the experience, but they have the desire. Scott says that they have idolized and respected the Funks, but now they’ve done something to their father and when you bruise one Armstrong you bruise the whole family. Come Summerblast they’re going to take care of business!

Morton says that ever since Chris Candido piledrove him he’s been trying to get back at him, and now they have these ‘piledriver’ matches where the only way to win is by piledriving your opponent. Although Bob Armstrong has said the matches will be unsanctioned, the title will still be on the line and the only thing they are concerned with is getting those titles back around their waists, they don’t care as they have been in all kinds of matches. Morton asks Tammy Fytch to come out as he would like to talk to her for a few minutes. She makes her way out but seems a little cautious and nervous about things. Morton says that ever since they’ve been wrestling Brian Lee & Chris Candido, Tammy has done one thing to them, so Robert and he have got a little something for her. Robert Gibson then appears from the back and empties a bucket of dirt (which they sell as manure) over her head. Candido and Lee comes rushing out to help her but are a little put off by the ‘smell’.

The Dirty White Boy says that another man has put their hands on his old lady and Jake Roberts has no idea what’s going through his mind when he sees him drop his wife on her head. Jake can beat on him all night long it doesn’t matter because he can take it, but he messed with his old lady. When they said their vows, for better or for worse, it wasn’t supposed to be anything like this, it’s like he’s taken something from him. The White Girl has said that she forgives him ‘don’t worry about it’, but he can’t even look his wife in the eye. Yes she’s forgave him, but he can’t forgive himself. Jake didn’t get a chance to listen to the Dirty White Boy’s interview as some of the other wrestlers in the back were wanting his autograph and pictures with him. He tried to accommodate most, but he’s never liked that Rock & Roll Express and is not going to take pictures with them no matter what they offer him! Jake says that when a child comes into this world does he know how to eat, how to fight, how to lie or how to steal? It’s the parents who teach them what to be, ‘Thanks Dad!’ So whatever he has done is not his fault (Bob Caudle starts shaking his head and going ‘oh Jake!’), it’s all because of outside impacts, of other people making the mistakes and ‘Tony’ made the mistake of getting in the ring with him. Whatever he has to do, be it taking his belt or abusing something that he holds on to at night, he’ll do. He’ll hurt them, keep them, use them and when he’s through using them he’ll spit them out A very different interview than what you would normally expect from an angry and upset Dirty White Boy. No ranting or raving, very similar in that way to a Jake Roberts interview, speaking quietly, softly and troubled that he wasn’t able to protect his wife. Fantastic stuff from both and one of the few saving graces in the promotion at this time.

That photo of Clive Myers is fantastic.

I considered nominating Thomson but considering there is less on tape of him that there is Alan Sarjeant didn't bother. I will say that I enjoyed the heck out of the three matches of his that I have seen though.

Sami Callihan ranking just ahead of Chris Candido? Something inside of me just died.

Music video set to Van Halen's 'Top of the World’ and shows clips of The Thrillseekers in action against various jobbers and Well Dunn. I do like Lance’s leap to the top rope and coming off with a reverse body block all in one move, as well as his spinning leg lariat off the top to a jobber on Jericho’s shoulders. The double dropkick off the top was The Thrillseekers finisher in their debut match against The Infernos and I speculated at the time that it would be interesting if we see that move again. Well the Rock & Roll Express clearly had words with them and they haven’t used it since!

Tammy's called a press conference to answer some of the controversies that have come up recently. There have been some questions as to who is the ‘boss’ in the team of Brian Lee & Chris Candido is? Obviously this has come from the male media as everyone knows that when a woman is involved the woman is in charge because women, unlike men, are born leaders. She calls the shots for the tag team champions, but occasionally she’ll let Brian and Chris think it was their idea just to keep them happy. There has been some concern as to whether there is a conflict between Chris and Brian? Obviously the people who are asking these questions have never attended a business class like she has, because anyone who has half a brain should know, all CEO’s of major companies keep competitiveness between their employees to increase productivity. Brian and Chris may argue once in a while, but that’s just to impress her as they both want to do the best they can for her. As far as the ‘piledriver match’ that Bob Armstrong has forced them into, she thinks that it’s ridiculous. Not only are Smoky Mountain Wrestling trying to make them lose the belts, but they are trying to hurt them as well. When Chris Candido used the piledriver on Ricky Morton it was in self-defence, he didn’t want to do it, he just had to in order to save his life (in a different interview they claim that Morton was trying to headbutt Candido in the groin!). She knows that the Rock & Rolls can’t beat them in a regular match but they may be able to piledrive them, so she doesn’t care what it takes, they’re going to make sure that they piledrive them first. It’s amazing how far Tammy has come in just over a year from that first promo and she looks fantastic here.

Les Thatcher tries to get a dressing room but the Dirty White Girl is on a stretcher and being carried out to an ambulance by Tony Anthony, Tracey Smothers, The Thrillseekers and Bobby Blaze. Jake Roberts says that in the heat of the battle men are sometimes asked to do things that they wouldn’t normally do. Sitting here reflecting on what just happened, he wonders what goes through his head as it’s not like he set out to do that. Then he remembers reading about Cain and Abel and wonders how Cain felt…because right now he feels pretty good. He taught the Dirty White Boy a lesson and showed him what he would sacrifice to get the job done. If it means picking a chair up and throwing it across the room, Jake the Snake will pick that chair up and throw it further than anybody else. If it means pushing that red button, if it means going down to the final countdown, Jake ‘the Snake’ Roberts will do that. Why? Because nobody has ever given him a damn thing his whole life, all they are interested in is what they want and that’s why Jake does the things he does. It’s not Jake’s fault, he’s a nice boy, he’s fun to play with, but he’s not playing with Tony, he’s the example. He warns the White Boy to keep the Dirty White Girl away from him and if he wants, the White Boy can keep away from him too. The run of great interviews and promos from Jake continues.

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When I think of Pat Roach I always think of Bomber spending all his money gambling and in the brothels of Dusseldorf in Auf Wiedersehen Pet! "Bomber likes the ladies does Bomber."

Les Thatcher wonders where the SMW Heavyweight belt is? Jake Roberts has never had to wrap a belt around his waist as the people know he’s the best, so why should he carry a piece of metal with him? There’s no need to bring it out here as there’s no-one that can beat him for it anyway. He wants to clear the air of a few things though. He was accused of trying to blind Tony Anthony with a camera, he just wanted to get the last picture of the champion, that’s all. It’s come to light that he’s gained a bit of weight, well when you have victory meals every night you do gain a bit of weight. He then says as the new champion of Smoky Mountain Wrestling, it’s his privilege to do something for these…to do something. If Donnie Ellison had a race car that went around the track at 200mph, won every race that year and then next year came out with a new model with wing designs and far more horse power he’d retire that car, it would be the humane thing to do. If a bull had sired a million calves and was no longer up to the job you’d retire him, it would be the humane thing to do. If a woman can no longer have children they give her a hysterectomy, it’s the humane thing to do. He’s got people working 24 hours a day for his fans as he’s going to give one of those sleeping masks to everyone, as when he and Tony meet again, it’s the humane thing to do not to let them see it. He tell the Dirty White Boy don’t be foolish, he’s had his fun, it’s over. Another very good promo, although the part about 'it being the humane thing to do' probably went too long. It was a bit weird to hear some of the fans cheers for Jake at times during this.

Bob Caudle wishes that Jim Cornette could’ve been out here earlier as he thinks Tracey Smothers has Bruiser Bedlam’s number. Cornette says that the only number he’s got is 911, because he’s going to be going to the hospital. That was the easiest $5,000 the Bruiser ever won in his life and he’s the undefeated TV champion. To anybody who thinks they’re big and bad, whether they are a professional wrestler, a truck driver, a bouncer, it doesn’t make any difference Bruiser Bedlam can kick your butt and is willing to at any opportunity. ‘Bullet Bob Armstrong is so noble, he’s on a mission, he’d get in the ring and take care of Bruiser Bedlam and all of his guys, but unfortunately he can’t resign as Commissioner because so many things need to be done around here. It makes Cornette sick to his stomach to see Bob Armstrong and Tracey Smothers on this campaign. If Bob Armstrong wants to get in the ring just resign as Commissioner, that’s all he’s got to do, but now he’s got Tracey Smothers doing his fighting for him. Cornette tells Smothers that he’s a hillbilly and the Bruiser says that hillbillies like to wear white shoes and have white flags so they can run fast and give up the fight. Tracey says that ‘The Bullet’ is like a second father to him, but Cornette wonders how he knows whether he is a first father or second father? From what he understands old man Smothers spent all his time drunk around Springfield staggering from one bar to the next, while Mrs Smothers had so many visitors to her bedroom she had to put a revolving door in the front of it. Tracey rushes out and clubs Bedlam and Cornette. The Bruiser pulls brass knux out of his trunks and nails Smothers which busts him open and he takes a tumble over the announcing desk. Anthony Michaels, Chris Hamrick and Brian Logan try to help but the Bruiser sees them all off while Cornette continues to attack Smothers. The attack only ends when Bobby Blaze and Bob Armstrong come out and Smothers is left bleeding and helpless on the floor amongst the busted announcer’s desk. We return from a break and Tracey is being held up by Blaze and Armstrong. He tells ‘Bullet’ Bob that this guy has got to be stopped and if he’s so big and bad why did he have to hit him with brass knux to put him down? He’s still standing and will still be standing long after he’s gone. He wants a ‘coal miner’s glove match’, that’s his match and that glove will just be like brass knucks and we’ll see how Bruiser Bedlam’s blood flows. Armstrong says that he doesn’t usually condone these kind of things, but after what just happened, he’s got that ‘coal miner’s glove’ match anytime he wants it. Tracey was great here and I agree with soup's comments in that this is the first time I've really felt like Smothers is the true face for the company which others have touched upon in the past. It does appear that Cornette's answer to everything is a gimmick match of some sort, and after the Dirty White Boy winning the title in a chain match and now another coal miner's glove match it's all a tad repetitive. Not to mention in this TV show they also set up a 'piledriver match' between the Rock & Rolls and Candido & Lee.

It's been a few years since I've watched it, but there are some tales in the Leilani Kai shoot interview that do Moolah no favours whatsoever.

I would have absolutely voted for Haward (he was fourth behind Grey, Breaks and Cortez when I was on my heavy WoS viewing) and there is every chance I would've chucked a vote Ken Joyce's way too. I had my reasons for dropping out of the process and am very content with that, though have enjoyed the discussions and watching the results unfold.

Personality Profile is no Down & Dirty w/ Dutch that's for sure! The Thrillseekers are today's guests and Jericho would like to thank all the fans who have been really good to them since they arrived and made them feel at home. Lance thinks they’re in Rocky Mountain Wrestling before correcting himself, and says the two of them are hoping to make their mark here in the tag team division. Well Dunn interrupt them and say that ever since they arrived in Smoky Mountain Wrestling The Thrillseekers have been dodging them. They haven’t been getting treated fairly, they’ve been in the WWF and all over the world and yet they get no respect. Steven Dunn has some requests and they want music videos, big contracts, entrance music and interview time. Everyone else is getting them and they want some of the pie. Jericho calls them Beavis & Butthead and says that maybe they haven’t got these things because they haven’t been working hard enough? Dunn says they’ve been chasing them all over SMW and if they think they don’t deserve it, any time, any place, they don’t care if it’s on TV or not, they’ll fight them, beat them and show all their stupid fans what no talent little punks they are. The Thrillseekers accept and the match is set for next week. Well Dunn are surprisingly good promos and Jericho was good here though I’m not too keen on the pandering to the crowd although I guess that was their role. Lance comes across fairly uncomfortable though he’s probably not helped by getting the name of the promotion wrong with his first sentence!

Bob Armstrong says that everyone knows that the ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage is on his way to Knoxville for the Volunteer Slam to take care of Bruiser Bedlam, but the news he promised everyone about the Dirty White Boy’s title defence has all been signed and finalised and he will face Jake ‘the Snake’ Roberts. Armstrong believes it will be the Dirty White Boy’s toughest defence yet, and rather than just talk about Jake, they’ve got some words from him. Jake appears to be sat at home and says let’s see how smart the people of Kentucky, Tennessee and Smoky Mountain are. Who was the man who dropped Andre the Giant? Who was the man that played with Randy Savage like a toy? Who was the man that made Rick Rude’s life miserable? Who was the man that had Sting this close to quitting professional wrestling? Who was the man that the WWF wouldn’t even think of putting Hulk Hogan in the ring with? Who was the man that invented the DDT? Who was the man who does exactly what he wants to? The answer to those is very simple, it’s Jake ‘the Snake’ Roberts. What he needs to know though is who the hell is the Dirty White Boy? She said he’s the SMW Heavyweight champion. Not for long as come May 20th that man will be Jake ‘the Snake’ Roberts like it or not, and you won’t. Back in the studio and Tony Anthony has joined them with his eye all bandaged following last week’s attack. Bob Armstrong tells him that he knows it’s going to be a tough test but he didn’t get that title easy and Jake Roberts is a mean, mean man. The White Boy says that Jake is one of the most evil and sickest human beings he’s ever met in his life. It’s bad enough to go up against him with two good eyes, but he’s handicapped because he’s only got the one. No matter what it takes, one eye, one arm, one leg, it doesn’t matter to him, he’ll be there defending this title. They then replay the attack on him from last week. Bob Caudle says it was a despicable act, they didn’t know what that stuff was and whether he was going to be permanently blinded or not. The White Boy says that the doctors don’t know and he’s got to wear this bandage for a few more weeks, but he got pearl harboured by a slinty eyed, sock wearing, nothing happening geek. He worked long and hard for this title and isn’t letting someone like him and that closet queen Daryl Van Horn get the better of him. The Dirty White Boy doesn’t back down from anyone so bring your army on! Mesmeric stuff from Jake just talking in his quiet, hushed tone. He doesn’t shout one bit and you’re hanging on every word he says. After one interview I’m already looking forward to more of Jake and the Dirty White Boy, not so Kendo and the White Boy mind.

Jake Roberts had come down to ringside to watch a Dirty White Boy squash against James Atkins and the White Boy wants to know what he was doing out here as he doesn’t just show up for no reason. Jake says that it’s great to be here in Smoky Mountain Wrestling because they’re giving people who are handicapped the chance to do something. He says that the Dirty White Boy looked fair out there in the ring, on a scale of one to ten, a soft four. The White Boy gets a bit closer to him, whilst Bob Armstrong is between the two of them trying to prevent anything from happening. Jake says how the Dirty White Boy is wanting him to hit him so that he can then get a lawyer onto him for slapping a blind man. He says that Tony looked good out there as champion and he can be champion this week, next week and the week after as he would never hit someone who is physically or mentally handicapped, and if he thinks he can beat him he is definitely mentally handicapped. He tells the White Boy if he is smart he can be champion for another year, as all he’s got to do is pat him on the back and say ‘Mr Roberts you’re exactly right, I know you’re a much better man than I am’. He doesn’t want to beat him up, he wants him at 100% so there will be no excuses, but he’ll never be 100%, never has been never will. The Dirty White Boy tells him if he wants a match he doesn’t have to wait for this handicapped, all he’s got to do is slither his backside into the ring and he’ll give him a title shot today. Armstrong tries to calm the White Boy down, but he doesn’t care. Jake says that he feels really bad about that, but not as bad as he’ll feel. Anthony tells Bob to sign the match as he’s worked hard for this title and he’ll be damned if he’s letting scum like that downgrade him and all these people. Jake is so freaking good here and the Dirty White Boy brings the goods too. On to the match and Jake has a right old gut on him at this point! Shoulder tackle from Jake and the Dirty White Boy takes a tumble out of the ring. Kendo the Samurai runs out and rips the White Boy’s eye patch off, but before he can do anymore damage Tracey Smothers, Bobby Blaze and Bob Armstrong all come out to stop him. Jake takes a camera from one of the photographers at ringside and flashes the camera in the White Boy’s already injured eye. DDT and Jake lies there for a few seconds thinking about it, before nonchalantly just putting one hand on the White Boy for the win and to become the new SMW Heavyweight champion. I thought this was an excellent match, psychologically so strong and built around the Dirty White Boy’s injured eye which they get so much out of. I found the match so gripping, was totally sucked in and Jake is an absolute master at getting so much out of doing so little. I’m with Loss on this one.

Jake's in his house again and says that one of the greatest things about being a professional wrestlers is when you’re on the road and in the dressing room, and you see a young kid just getting started having his first match and within seconds you know whether they are going to make it or not because you are a good judge of talent, say like the Dirty White Boy back in Oklahoma or somewhere. The frustrating thing us when you see that kid who was really trying, then you see him ten years later down the line and you were right. You knew the guy wasn’t going to make it ‘and you haven’t Tony’. He starts to mock the Dirty White Boy’s eye injury and says how he is looking down the line and realises that Jake ‘the Snake’ Roberts is coming to Smoky Mountain Wrestling and he’s starting to make his excuses already. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, that comes out of the good book, a book that means a lot to him. It should mean a lot to the Dirty White Boy too, because if you remember there was a serpent in that book who started a whole lot of trouble and the Dirty White Boy’s troubles have only just begun. Second fantastic interview on the trot from Jake. I am slightly struggling on my Smoky Mountain viewing at the moment, but Jake and the White Boy (along with Chris Candido, Brian Lee and Tammy Fytch) is one of the few thing that keeps me going and that I look forward to each episode.

Dutch Mantel is in a South America but can’t say where as some people are trying to find him. He had received some late night phone calls and some bad looking people had started to follow him around, so thought it would be beneficial to his health if he just left the country. He tells everyone that he is okay and hopes to be back soon, when his bodyguards (Paco and Julio) spot some people and they abruptly have to go. Dutch deserved better than this as his swansong, especially as the storyline doesn’t go anywhere. Surely they could have thought of a better way to write him out than this? I will say without question that he is one of the best colour men ever after having watching his run in Smoky Mountain Wrestling and Bob Caudle and he were a wonderful double act. It really won’t be the same without him (hmmm, haven’t I said that already recently?) and does feel like a changing of the guards with the Heavenly Bodies also now out of there.