Kurt Angle vs. Awesome Kong

[smkelly]

KONG VS ANGLE

 

By: Lance Storm

The Fight Network

 

I was on Wrestling Observer Live this past Sunday night and Bryan Alvarez thought out the idea of putting the TNA World Title on Awesome Kong. His view was that Kong and Tomko were the only two people in TNA that the booking committee hasn’t made a complete joke out of and that she has enough credibility that he would be completely fine with TNA putting the World Title on her. This got me thinking and while putting the World Title on Awesome Kong would not be my first choice of things to do, I think TNA could do a lot worse than building towards a “Battle of the Sexes” Kong vs. Angle World Title match.

 

I’m not suggesting that Kong win the TNA World Title, I’m just saying building towards this match and selling it on PPV could potentially generate a lot of publicity and in turn create enough interest to draw PPV buys and thus be considered a success. Kong has been booked very strong since her debut and has dominated and laid waste to every TNA knockout on the roster. She is actually bigger than most of the guys on the TNA roster, she is a very solid worker, and perhaps more importantly has been drawing higher quarter hour ratings than her male counterparts on Impact of late. There is a brief window of opportunity here to create a unique Main Event that has never been done before.

 

There will of course be people that compare it to Chyna wining the Intercontinental Title, but I think it is completely different. I think Kong is a far superior worker who currently stands out as a legit dominant force. Kong isn’t just a chick that is built like a dude, trying to compete with the men, she is a uniquely dominant force, which has enough credibility right now to allow us to be able to speculate about whether she could compete with the men or not. Challenging one time for a World Title shot is different than trying to just straight up compete in the men’s division. You promote this as a novelty concept and you do it now while she is still fresh, strong, and over. You build for the one match and sell the curiosity factor. You make this a one time only “Battle of the Sexes”.

 

The one obstacle I see in building this match is the “no guy on girl” violence policy in TNA. I know Spike TV has told TNA they don’t want guys hitting girls on Impact anymore, but I’m wondering if they might make a small exception considering it would actually be more girl hitting guys in the build up for this match. Last week on Impact they aired a clip of Kong power bombing the referee so there must be some flexibility. I think the key to booking this match is creating the justification for Kong getting a title shot without her just starting to wrestle guys and earning it. If she starts wrestling guys the novelty will be worn off before it gets to PPV and you run the risk of damaging roster credibility if you job a bunch of guys to a girl, even if it is Kong.

 

What I would do is have her destroy ODB on Impact to lay waste to the #1 Contender, leaving her without a viable challenger. I would have both Gail and ODB selling long-term injuries from the beating they took from Kong, and the other knockouts terrified to face her. I would then use the Petey Williams – Scott Steiner feud to get Kong her title shot via the “Feast or Fired” brief case. You could book a match between Williams and Steiner for the brief case as an Impact Main Event. When the match is first booked Williams is of course very worried and reluctant to put up his case. When he comes to the ring for the match he is very confident and sure of himself. When Steiner’s music hits, Scotty is nowhere do be found. Petey is laughing and demands they start the match. They could cut to the back and show Steiner laid out somehow (it will be revealed later that Petey jumped him backstage and knocked him out, or hit him with a car whatever). In ring Petey continues to demand they start the match, he can say it’s not his fault Steiner isn’t ready for the match, if Steiner was a real pro he’d be ready to fight anybody anytime just like Petey is right now. At this point you have Kong hit the ring jump Petey and they ring the bell. Petey after all just said he was ready to fight anyone, anytime, right now. You could have Cornette or Morgan at ringside to actually make this call officially to make it legit.

 

I would book this match extremely short for a couple of reasons. If you keep it short Petey can save face a little, by saying he got beat because he got jumped by surprise and if it’s short enough you can avoid the guy on girl violence issue on Spike. I’d have Kong club the hell out of Pete when she jumps him from behind and take his head of with the spinning back fist. She will be a fair bit bigger than Petey, which will really help her credibility. She can then send him off the ropes for a backdrop Pete stops and hooks her for the Canadian Destroyer. This should get a great reaction. When he goes for the Destroyer she blocks it and Alabama Slams the living hell out of him for the finish. Kong then grabs the Heavyweight Title shot brief case, and you go off the air.

 

With Kong in possession of the brief case the match is set for PPV, she doesn’t need to face any more guys to earn the title shot. You hype the match with video packages, and do face-to-face stuff to put over Kong’s size. You don’t need an angle to build the match at this point the whole sell is curiosity for the “Battle of the Sexes”; the first time ever the Women’s World Champ vs. The Men’s World Champ. You can even do a tale of the tape to show that she is as big or even bigger than the Men’s World Champ.

 

You would then have to be very careful how you laid out and book the match on PPV, but Kurt is a fantastic worker and Kong is both big enough and strong enough to work a competitive enough match and still protect Kurt’s credibility. Kurt got pinned clean by Jay Lethal not that long ago, and no offense to Lethal, Kong has been booked stronger than he was at that point and likely has more credibility. They could work a competitive enough match that Kurt could go over clean and not lose much if any credibility. Kong would be even stronger and more over than before, she just held her own with the World Champ. Even if the match had to be kept a little short to avoid Kurt having to sell too much for Kong, the fact that a World Title match on PPV had a completely clean finish would more than make up for it.

 

Again let me state that I am not saying this would be my first choice of angles to book. I’m just saying I could think of a lot worse things to do, and I’d bet it would create interest and likely draw as well if not far better than what TNA has been doing on PPV of late.

Saw this on another board, thought it was very interesting.

[Jingus]

Lance sure does seem to do a lot of fantasy booking in his commentaries.

 

Personally, I've never minded intergender matches, and wished there were more of them. The problem is, aside from rare exceptions like Chyna, pretty much any time we get mixed-gender violence in wrestling, it either tends to be "big strong man beating the shit out of a defenseless woman" abuse, or "comedy worker getting suplexed by a chick because it'll get a pop" nonsense which clearly isn't supposed to be taken seriously. There's still a really strong sexist double-standard in wrestling, and plenty of the guys tend to have the belief that no woman should ever, ever be portrayed as a physical threat to a man in any way. Which is of course horseshit, especially when you look at someone like Kong, who at over six feet tall and three hundred pounds is bigger than most of the guys in TNA. But I think you could believably book just about any male-female match, as long as the wrestlers were professional about it and didn't act like insecure he-men. If teeny-tiny guys like Rey Misterio Jr, Amazing Red, or Spike Dudley can be booked to win matches over much larger opponents, I've never understood why it's so unthinkable to have a female of the same size do the same thing.

[smkelly]

Yeah, Kong could legit destroy Red and Spike, easily.

[smkelly]

I think this idea would be interesting, but not something TNA could pull off.

 

I wouldn't want to see Kong get in any credible offense on Angle, considering his amatuer history, and overall standing in professional wrestling. However, I wouldn't want to see Kong get pummeled either. It's definitely hard to pull off without someone looking bad.

[Big Rob]

Yeah, it's probably best not touching right now so that neither of them gets damaged by it, but it probably would be a good match. Maybe have it as a tv main event, as opposed to a PPV attraction.

[smkelly]

*If* done properly, it could bring in some buzz, and maybe draw a decent PPV outing. However, the negative press involved would hinder any good that would come from it.

 

1 - Men shouldn't be "fighting" women

2 - Kong isn't a credible threat to a man with Angle's credentials, replace her with a fitness/Drill Instructor from the Marine Corps. and that might be a little more believable

3 - TNA would ultimately screw it up horrendously, probably having Angle brutalize Kong, or mocking her nationality

4 - Angle would be made to lock like a chump if Kong scored any credible offense on him, people aren't willing to believe a woman is possible of inflicting damage upon a man yet, even in the year 2008

[Jingus]

people aren't willing to believe a woman is possible of inflicting damage upon a man yet, even in the year 2008

When you say "people", do you mean society at large, or just wrestling fans? Because I couldn't begin to count the number of movies, tv shows, and books which have had some badass chick kick men's asses.

 

Even if you're just talking about wrestling, which does tend to live within a time capsule set back at least a decade, the success of Chyna's push would seem to indicate that fans wouldn't exactly riot if a female is presented as a threat. I've seen plenty of bitching on message boards from older fans about how she killed the Intercontinental title and such, but the live crowd and tv viewers seemed to eat it up.

[smkelly]

I'm referring to both, actually.

 

And don't think the fans actually were making all of that noise, Vince was piping in a tremendous amount of volume back in those days.

[Jingus]

Chyna was ridiculously over circa 1999-2000. She got the second-biggest pop of the night the one time I saw her live, which definitely wasn't piped in. It's arguable whether she was actually a draw, but she certainly wasn't driving anyone away. I don't think Jarrett or Jericho lost any credibility from feuding with her, if anything they were more over afterwards. Her push coincided with their all-time highest ratings, and her Playboy sold however many billion copies. It's pretty hard to argue that she wasn't a success, at least until she Self Destructed due to ego, drugs, jealousy of the boss's daughter, or whatever.

[Loss]

I'm referring to both, actually.

 

And don't think the fans actually were making all of that noise, Vince was piping in a tremendous amount of volume back in those days.

Source?

[smkelly]

Chyna was ridiculously over circa 1999-2000. She got the second-biggest pop of the night the one time I saw her live, which definitely wasn't piped in. It's arguable whether she was actually a draw, but she certainly wasn't driving anyone away. I don't think Jarrett or Jericho lost any credibility from feuding with her, if anything they were more over afterwards. Her push coincided with their all-time highest ratings, and her Playboy sold however many billion copies. It's pretty hard to argue that she wasn't a success, at least until she Self Destructed due to ego, drugs, jealousy of the boss's daughter, or whatever.

I think it hurt Jericho. It was his first major feud since joining the WWF, he should have been feuding with the Rock instead. Although Chyna is a genetic freak, I just don't buy her beating someone like Jericho legit, and it takes away from the match, at least, in my eyes. It's certainly possible that she could defeat Jarrett, but not Jericho (he's kicked Goldberg's ass).

 

I still don't understand how her Playboy sold that many copies. She's like a man. The WWF was at it's peak in '98, and early '99, correct?

 

Loss, I read about the piping in thing on some message board, who had citied a direct quote from Meltzer, IIRC.

[Boondocks Kernoodle]

I still don't understand how her Playboy sold that many copies.

Lesbians? Not joking, I think that really could have been a factor.

 

Whenever I doubt Vince's promotional skill, I just think: He made Chyna into a sex symbol. He made people want to see her naked. That is amazing.

[tomk]

C'mon WWF under Vince has always been promoted for closeted gays. Chyna is the ideal man with vag.

[Jingus]

Although Chyna is a genetic freak, I just don't buy her beating someone like Jericho legit, and it takes away from the match, at least, in my eyes.

Why? She's much bigger than Jericho, and possibly stronger than him. Similar to how Awesome Kong is bigger and stronger than most of the top guys in TNA; if Kurt Angle can sell for Christian's offense, I don't see why selling Kong's would be a problem. Do you just not believe that a girl can whup a guy, period?

[Bix]

Lia Miavia. That is all.

[Cox]

Also, Barbarian's wife.

[Bix]

It's way too hard to determine who's tougher: The woman who beat up a police force or the woman who instilled fear in The Barbarian.

[smkelly]

Although Chyna is a genetic freak, I just don't buy her beating someone like Jericho legit, and it takes away from the match, at least, in my eyes.

Why? She's much bigger than Jericho, and possibly stronger than him. Similar to how Awesome Kong is bigger and stronger than most of the top guys in TNA; if Kurt Angle can sell for Christian's offense, I don't see why selling Kong's would be a problem. Do you just not believe that a girl can whup a guy, period?

 

Strength has nothing to do with it, considering Andre the Giant is way stronger than say...Bruce Lee, but we all know who'd win that fight.

 

I know women are certainly capable of beating men to death/senseless/into submission, or whatever, but it's something I just don't think is really necessary, or realistic. There's a clear division in wrestling, the men are vastly superior, and it's booked that way for a reason. How many men would enjoy watching a woman beat the holy hell out of a man like Angle? I'm sure women feel the same way when one of the ladies gets brutalized by a man, it has the same effect.

[Jingus]

I know women are certainly capable of beating men to death/senseless/into submission, or whatever, but it's something I just don't think is really necessary, or realistic.

At the beginning of the sentence, you acknowledge that it really happens. At the end, you say it's unrealistic.

 

There's a clear division in wrestling, the men are vastly superior, and it's booked that way for a reason.

What reason? Besides the obvious one about muscle mass and upper body strength. Because as you pointed out, strength isn't everything.

 

How many men would enjoy watching a woman beat the holy hell out of a man like Angle? I'm sure women feel the same way when one of the ladies gets brutalized by a man, it has the same effect.

Forgive me if I'm being presumptious, but it sounds like you're projecting your personal feelings onto humanity in general.

 

I was there live for the early TNA feud between Kid Kash and Trinity. Those two beat the absolute living dogshit out of each other. And guess what, the crowd loved it. Around the same time, in the indy fed that I worked for we had ODB as our television champion, wrestling (and beating) men every week. That crowd loved that too. And these crowds were not made up of progressive sophisticates who believed in female equality, these were Tennessee rednecks straight out of the trailer park, and they loved this shit. They had no problem believing that these women could legitimately defeat these men in a fight. Hell, one time I even wrestled a tag match where it was me and ODB against Traci Brooks and another girl. I was the only guy in the match, and I took the heat segment! Those chicks kept me down and beat the crap out of me for five minutes straight, and the crowd bought it. And not because I'm some Mysterio-sized guy, I'm six feet tall and over two hundred pounds. Yet the crowd had no problem suspending their disbelief, and even popped when I made the hot tag.

 

 

 

Like I said earlier, popular mainstream media has given us a steady diet of badass women who are entirely capable of hanging with the guys. I spent a little while on IMDB coming up with this list, just to make my point. Various movies and shows have given us two-fisted heroines played by actresses like Keira Knightly, Uma Thurman, Carrie-Anne Moss, Halle Berry, Jennifer Garner, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Jessica Alba, Milla Jovavich, Lucy Liu, Angelina Jolie, Kristanna Loken, Michelle Rodriguez, Asia Argento, Charlize Theron, Devon Aoki, Summer Glau, Julianne Moore, Cate Blanchett, Famke Janssen, Eliza Dushku, Jennifer Lopez, Drew Barrymore, Rose McGowan, Kate Beckinsale, Ashley Judd, Maggie Q, Gina Gershon, Rosario Dawson, and estrogen-power poster girl Lucy Lawless. Hell, Hilary Swank won Best Actress in a Best Picture about a female boxer. Every single actress I just named has played multiple roles in the past decade where she kicked a man's ass or was portrayed as a serious physical threat. And it's not like this is some new phenomenon which exploded out of nowhere: they're just following the trail that was blazed by women like Sigourney Weaver, Sharon Stone, Geena Davis, Linda Hamilton, Michelle Pfeiffer, Kathy Bates, Glenn Close, Bridgitte Nielsen, Jamie Lee Curtis, not to mention the countless Asian asskickers in the kung-fu films, all the way back to Pam Grier and her fellow tough broads in the 70s exploitation flicks. One could make a case for going back even further to the boulder-chested dominatrixes in Russ Meyers' potboilers, and to various thick-skinned bitches who packed iron in countless Westerns.

 

None of those shows or movies caused audiences to stop going to theaters or turn off their TV in disgust. Quite the opposite, they mostly drew a whole lot of money.

 

 

So why do you keep insisting that society isn't going to believe seeing a girl beat up a guy?

[Indikator]

Lia Miavia. That is all.

Have you read Pat Barretts book? Very disturbing...

[Slasher]

Jericho was definitely hurt by the Chyna feud. It has nothing to do with credibility though. It had more to do with the fact it was seen as a step down from where Jericho was teased (The Rock). The feud itself probably set Jericho back a few months and took a summer series with Benoit and HHH to restore that perception.