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Everything posted by MLB
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I don't know if @SirEdger is open to it, but as a reader I'd love to see a deal worked out for Jamie Dundee to join SMW. We need PG-13!
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All good, I'm fooling around! I am so immersed in '96 and I am pouring everything into that project. I was just peeking in on the thread and acknowledging a kayfabe rivalry with @Control21, I am sure he has interesting plans with Onita.
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Although this program is steeped in nostalgia, in many ways W*ING USA anticipates future trends in professional wrestling. W*ING USA is featuring women in hot main events, whereas no other promotion is booking them at all in the 1996 project. The way I am featuring Meltzer predates PWG (also based in LA and a model I am using) incorporating Dave into the shows (sitting ringside, naming moves after him, merchandise). With the recent addition of Ken Shamrock, there is also the shoot fighting element that became a bigger crossover attraction with Lesnar. AEW has shown deep reverence to Onita in more ways than one.
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I object! @Control21 cannot have Onita! Transaction overruled!
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The Talent Transactions/Official Roster Thread
MLB replied to Perfectly Straightedge's topic in Game Station
Bloodstar will be the final appearance of Combat Toyoda in W*ING USA, who had already retired in real life in May of 1996. Without spoilers, I have written plans for her exit at the next event. So with that being said, W*ING USA releases Combat Toyoda and signs "The Lethal Weapon" Steve Blackman. -
Ken Shamrock to appear in W*ING USA? UFC star Ken Shamrock was spotted backstage at W*ING TV's recent taping in Los Angeles. This was a very interesting development given Onita's pointed remarks about RINGS and shoot style during that same broadcast. Ken Shamrock's brother, Frank, is currently with Akira Maeda's promotion in Japan. Ken Shamrock has a professional wrestling background starting in 1989, and his rookie year included a WWF dark match loss to Barry Horowitz. WWF and WCW did not show interest in Ken Shamrock despite his recent pay per view success with the Ultimate Fighting Championship. Ken Shamrock is expected to appear for W*ING USA after Bloodstar in October. With the recent acquisitions of Ken Shamrock, Bam Bam Bigelow, Raven, and the rumored comeback of Terry Funk, W*ING USA has significantly bolstered it's upper card and continues to gain momentum in the wake of ECW's sudden closure.
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Not that it's against the rules, but NWA is also using Dokken's "Into the Fire" as their show theme. Very cool song, clearly! Big Apple Grapple sounds like it's gonna be fun. The tag division could be the best feature of SMW and the tournament will showcase that. I've always liked Battlebowl since I was a kid and I used a similar battle royal eliminator leading into a championship match concept for W*ING USA. My money would be on the Arkansas Hit Squad taking the gold but I've no idea yet who the final mystery team will be.
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The Talent Transactions/Official Roster Thread
MLB replied to Perfectly Straightedge's topic in Game Station
W*ING USA releases the Blue Meanie and signs Ken Shamrock. -
I mentioned Heyman, but Russo also loves the spoof and it's a big part of how he wrote. Gillberg immediately comes to mind. Midget Bret. In WCW, Juvi was doing "The Juice", along with Ferrara doing the regrettable Oklahoma gimmick. We saw a lot of it in TNA with Voodoo Kin Mafia, Black Machismo, "Stone Cold" Shark Boy, and Lil Petey Pump. I gave a shout out to XPW, but GCW is pretty great as well. I'm surprised honestly that Effy, Allie Katch, and some of their other talent hasn't moved up. Obviously, I'm a huge Gage fan. I've never understood how Cornette could book New Jack but hate so much on Gage. Joey Janela's great, it's a bummer it didn't work in AEW and he couldn't overcome his critics. If we had a 2023 project, I'd want those kind of wrestlers.
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What about Bischoff straight up challenging Vince to a PPV match?
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Thanks for the comments. The 90s were a lot more wild and the show aims to relive the outlaw spirit of that time. After the 90s, to me, is when Harry Potter took over the world for better for worse. I'm also trying to write this for smart fans because you guys know your stuff. I'm glad the humor is appreciated, ECW was packed with spoofs. @Control21, nice to hear you get the jokes, I'm definitely playing around with the Onita character. I was watching UFC in 1995, no disrespect to RINGS. From the bWo, to Austin in a Bischoff wig while pounding on his desk like a lunatic, or Foley and "Don't Fire Me, Uncle Eric", Heyman always had that element going on. We still see spoofs effectively used today like Miz dressing up as LA Knight. It's something that seems to always get over. The nWo parodying the Horsemen and DX with the Nation was HUGE. Somebody with average talent like Sandow got very far with it. I want to give a very small plug here to XPW because their current shows have been awesome and nobody talks about them. I think they're trying to instigate a war with GCW and they just won't bite on it lol. And I get it, they are true outlaw. Rob Black's a porn guy, they booked Tessa Blanchard (who looked better than ever, a total star) and a lot of people won't support that. Shlak has a very shady past. MAGA Butcher with that gimmick is very provocative, etc. But if people happen to read this thread and enjoy this type of style, XPW is where it's at right now. Anyway, there's still a lot to come with big debuts (Terry Funk, Tommy Dreamer, Sabu, Chyna) and some decent swerves coming. I've done a good job building some tension between Onita and Hayabusa, i.e., Old Guard vs. New Guard, Promoter vs. Wrestler. I definitely read the other shows and if something catches my eye I will work that into my programming.
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***W*ING USA Presents: Bloodstar*** W*ING USA Grand Championship Match: Hayabusa (Champion) vs. Bam Bam Bigelow W*ING USA Trios Championship WarGames Match: Mr. Pogo/Headhunter A/Headhunter B (w/ Victor Quinones) vs. New Jack/Balls Mahoney/Mikey Whipwreck (w/ Beulah McGillicutty) vs. Jason the Terrible/Crypt Keeper/Super Leather (w/ Sonny Onoo) vs. Jeff Hardy* *Due to injuries suffered by The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express, Jeff Hardy will be competing on his own. Women’s Trios Match: Megumi Kudo/Fabulous Moolah/Alundra Blayze vs. Aja Kong/Shark Tsuchiya/Combat Toyoda (w/ Victor Quinones) Tag Team Match: Super Crazy/Mascarita Sagrada Jr. vs. Vampiro/Virus (w/ Luna Vachon) Bloodstar will open the show with one of the most influential bands in heavy metal music and a pioneering force in death metal, DEATH! DEATH will be performing their song “The Philosopher” live at the W*ING Warehouse!
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I'm fairly certain that I have the most dead wrestlers on my roster currently: RIP Bam Bam, Luna, New Jack, Terry Funk, Mike Awesome, Balls Mahoney, Fabulous Moolah, Chyna, Hayabusa, Buddy Landel, Super Leather, Mr. Pogo.
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I'll join the choir on Toni Storm, everybody loves her. I've always loved Saraya as well...that's my cross to bear. Doctor Britt's an amazing beauty, but do I think WWE missed the boat on her? Not really.
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My earliest wrestling memory was Andre ripping Hogan's cross off his chest on Piper's Pit, I was four years old. I saw WM III on PPV and recorded it on VHS cassette.
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Yeah, you have the beginnings of Dragongate and I'm personally stoked for Super Dragon. It's not that bad but there's all-star classes in the following years of 1998-2000. 1993 wasn't really that awful with Jeff Hardy, Bob Holly and Homicide in that class. Some years are more fruitful than others.
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Those are good wrestlers for sure, @jeff5819. But you can see things really pick up in 1998. Look at the debuts in 2000 compared to Test and Albert: Kenny Omega, Brock Lesnar, Kevin Owens, Randy Orton, Trish Stratus, Claudio Castagnoli, Alberto Del Rio, The Briscoes.
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I have to say that 1997 was a very weak draft class outside of Goldberg, I mean it's almost undraftable. 1993 was another really bad year in terms of debuts that was headlined pretty much by Christopher Daniels, which tells you all you need to know about that year. 1998 is loaded with AJ Styles, Kurt Angle, Chris Hero, Low Ki, Jun Kasai, Necro Butcher, Naomichi Marufuji and Kofi Kingston becoming active. In 1999 we hit the motherload: John Cena, CM Punk, Samoa Joe, Bryan Danielson, Batista, Nigel McGuiness, Nick Gage and Lita.
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It dawned on me today that most of the members of this project were actually *born* around the early 90's...@Autistic Dragon was three years old in 1996! I turn 40 next month and I'm beginning to trip out over being around this long.
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Yee haw! SMW is back! SMW Revival is more similar to W*ING USA in the 1996 project than one might think. We are both closer to regional territories than being like the national feds. Although, WCW/NWA are also doing more of a traditional program like SMW, which helps W*ING USA stand out. A lot of the SMW names I had on my back up list ended up signing with you and it's good they're being used. Big fan, I can tell this is your bread and butter with the southern style! Onita is a shooter but it's all a work!
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W*ING TV Season 1, Episode #2: *W*ING USA Season 1 Theme plays - "Bloodlust" by Iron Cross* *Highlights roll from ‘96 Tears including: Hayabusa sitting atop the ladder with the Grand Championship! Dynamite Kid leaving his boots in the ring! Cobra thrown over the top in the battle royal! Pogo spitting a massive fireball at Sandman!* Kris Kloss: The wait is over! Welcome to W*ING TV, Episode 2! I am your lead announcer, Kris Kloss, and with me tonight is the esteemed Dave Meltzer! Dave Meltzer: Thank you again, Kris, um…very wild show at ‘96 Tears, Onita certainly has the industry talking. Things really got out of control. Kris Kloss: It was an unforgettable night and a tour de force performance by the new W*ING USA Grand Champion Hayabusa! Dave, I’ve just received word that we’re going to footage from earlier today featuring Jeff Hardy and the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express arriving at the W*ING WAREHOUSE! We cut to a Cadillac pulling up to the venue with Jeff Hardy, Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson in denim jackets getting out. Hardy gets out of the car first and begins unloading their gear while carrying the Rock ‘n’ Roll’s bags. Ricky Morton: I tell ya, Jeff, you gotta believe in yourself…you have the talent to be a world champion someday. Robert Gibson: Just stay off drugs, kid, and you’ll go far… All of a sudden, a long black stretch limousine pulls up. Mr. Pogo and the Headhunters rush out of the vehicle and start to assault Hardy and the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express! Headhunter slams the Cadallac trunk onto a bloody Robert Gibson! Robert Gibson: Ahhh….ahh…..!!! Pogo has a chain wrapped around Morton’s neck! Morton is turning blue! The Headhunters pound on Hardy as he is laid out on the concrete. Victor Quinones finally emerges from the limo. Victor Quinones (pointing at Morton): Hold him down! Finish him off!! The Headhunters hold Morton down on the concrete as Pogo gets into the Cadillac and puts the keys into the ignition. Pogo is going to run over Morton’s head! Ricky Morton: Nooooo!!!…… Finally, new head of W*ING security John Zandig shows up with backup! Tarzan Goto, Matsunaga and others swarm the heels as they rush back and speed away in the black limousine! *We cut back to Kloss and Meltzer.* Kris Kloss: Absolutely heinous actions by Quinones and his crew! Pogo was going to kill Morton! You have to question whether or not the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express will make it to WarGames after that beating! Dave Meltzer: I mean, that was incredibly violent stuff…W*ING USA is really pushing the envelope. Onita is gonna have a hard time getting sponsors, stuff like that, if he can’t tone it down… *Atsushi Onita's Theme plays - "Wild Thing" by Sam Kinison* Kris Kloss: Dave, I think Onita might’ve heard you! Here’s the boss! Onita makes his way to the squared circle with his usual entourage of Goto and Kimona Wanalaya. The fans are going bananas as Onita slaps fives around ringside! Onita is wearing business attire and smoking a cigarette. Crowd: Oh! Nee! Tah! Oh! Nee! Tah! Onita gets into the ring and is handed a microphone which he taps to test if it is live. Onita: W*ING USA!!!! LOS ANGELES!!! It’s time to DIE FOR W*ING!!!! Crowd: DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! Onita: So let’s see, we have a lot going on…after we made history at ‘96 Tears!! We have some other business to tend to before I bring out the champion Hayabusa (crowd pops)...a lot happening in the world of wrestling… Onita looks directly into the camera with Goto and Kimona behind him. Onita: …Akira Maeda!!... Meltzer (sighs): Oh god, y’know, I was hoping Onita wasn’t going to mention this… Onita: Akira Maeda!! Meltzer tells me that you’ve been sticking your nose in W*ING USA’s affairs… Meltzer: Please leave me out of this…. Onita: Maeda, buddy, how about you stay in your lane, ok?...You leave the pro wrestling to me! I’ll leave the grapplefuck to you!! Crowd: Grapplefuck!.. Grapplefuck!.. Grapplefuck!.. DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! Meltzer (sighs again): …good grief… Onita (confused): Meltzer also tells me…there’s some hillbilly promotion coming back…called Smoky Mountain? Crowd: BOOOOOO!!!!! Onita: Look man, I don’t know what you rednecks are smoking on that mountain but this is Hollywood…we are W*ING USA!…we are taking over the industry!!! Crowd: DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! Onita: We got that cleared up?…Tonight, lemme tell you our main event…A wild card Trios tournament match to enter as the fourth team in WarGames at Bloodstar for the Trios Championship!! It will be New Jack! (crowd pops) Mikey Whipwreck and Balls Mahoney! (crowd pops) Get the chance to face Pogo and the Headhunters for revenge in WarGames!...They will face off with Gladiator Mike Awesome!! (crowd pops) and the debuting team of The Terminators, Crash and Bash!! Crowd: DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! Onita: Now…Let’s bring out the new W*ING USA Grand Champion…Hayabusa!! *Hayabusa's theme plays - “Fight With Dream” by Unknown Artist* Hayabusa walks to the ring in an official W*ING USA “AIR HAYABUSA” shirt and sweatpants with his mask on and the belt around his waist. Crowd: Haya! Busa! *Clap, Clap, Clap!* Onita: Hey!..Welcome champ!…(puts arm around Hayabusa)...you finally did it, huh? You finally won the big one? Hayabusa totally no sells Onita and stares straight ahead. Onita: So tell us, Hayabusa!...How does it feel, huh?...Tell the people! Hayabusa says nothing while glaring into Onita’s eyes. Hayabusa: .... Onita (agitated): You see, Hayabusa, this is the problem with you, huh?...The problem with your generation! You don’t talk, ok?...I got bills to pay, you understand? Tickets to sell! These people want to hear you!! Hayabusa scans the crowd as they react to Onita’s remarks. Crowd: Haya! Busa! *Clap, Clap, Clap!* Onita: I will say, champ…they don’t seem to care, huh? That title looks good on you, do you mind if I try it on? Hayabusa stares at Onita and reluctantly removes the title from his waist and hands it over to Onita. Onita (smiling): Wow!!…I think this might look even better on me!! What do you think, Hayabusa? Onita walks around the ring with the W*ING USA Grand Championship on his shoulder! Crowd: Oh! Nee! Tah! Oh! Nee! Tah! Onita hands the title back to Hayabusa. Onita: Since Hayabusa…you want to be the silent champion…I need to bring in some box office as your challenger at Bloodstar…somebody that American fans are very familiar with… *Bam Bam Bigelow’s theme plays - “Three Little Pigs” by Green Jello (Green Jelly)* Bam Bam Bigelow walks through the curtain to a big ovation by the W*ING USA fans! Bigelow is wearing an official W*ING USA hockey jersey with BIGELOW 96 printed on the back. Kris Kloss: It’s Bam Bam! Meltzer: Mega signing by W*ING USA, really big…Bam Bam Bigelow is, I think, the face of pro wrestling video game covers. Bigelow gets into the ring and locks eyes with Hayabusa. Crowd: DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! Onita: So the Grand Championship will be on the line!!…the Beast from the East, Bam Bam Bigelow! Against Hayabusa!... *All of a sudden* *Fabulous Moolah’s theme plays - “I Am Woman” by Helen Reddy* Kris Kloss: Talk about out of nowhere! What in the-? Crowd: Moolah! Moolah! Moolah! The Fabulous Moolah walks down to the ring with the LIWA Championship title on her shoulder. Meltzer: That is the Las Vegas International Women’s Association Championship…Moolah, actually, believe it or not, is still active at 73 years old. Onita (smiles): Fabulous Moolah…this isn’t the best timing, we’re in the middle of something here… Onita hands Moolah a microphone as she enters the ring. Moolah: Mr. Onita, I am the Fabulous Moolah…I don’t make appointments, honey! I’ve been watching your show, Mr. Onita, and I think I have something to offer you. I have seen you have the best women’s wrestling in the entire world…I have a prospect, Mr. Onita, the likes of which the wrestling world has never seen before…trust me, Mr. Onita, Vince and Eric are drooling over her… Onita: Ok, make it quick, Moolah…who is she? What do you want? Moolah: I will reveal her at Bloodstar…but on one condition, Mr. Onita. Onita: What? Hurry! Moolah: I want to team with Megumi Kudo and Alundra Blayze and test myself against Quinones’ ladies! Aja Kong! Shark Tsuchiya! And Combat Toyoda! Onita (smoking): Sure, sure…fine!…at Bloodstar, it will be a trios match and we will see your new discovery!! As the eventful segment wrapped up, Hayabusa extended his hand to Bam Bam Bigelow in a show of sportsmanship. Bigelow refused to shake hands and walked out of the ring. Kris Kloss: Folks, we’re going to take a brief pause and we’ll be back with our first match of the night. Dr. Wagner Jr. will be facing a mystery opponent in the 1st round of the W*ING USA Turbo Violence Championship tournament! *Break* Kris Kloss: Ladies and gentleman, we’re back with a video sent in by The Sandman who is in recovery after being brutally attacked at ‘96 Tears by Mr. Pogo! The Sandman is sitting on a couch with gauze and sunglasses over his eyes. Beulah McGillicutty is sitting next to Sandman while rubbing his shoulder. Sandman: Pogo…(puffs cigarette)....you don’t think I can see better in the dark!! You think I haven’t been blinded before!! I’m gonna keep this short…The pussy ass doctors will not clear me by Bloodstar…I got my boys a shot at the WarGames…so then at the next taped event, Zero Fear, I want you, Pogo…not in a match…but a street fight…and not only a street fight…but a SKID ROW STREET FIGHT DEATHMATCH! ME AND YOU, POGO! On the streets of Los Angeles, no sanctions!! Fans, if you think you saw it all in the Hollywood Backlot Brawl?…Wait until you see what I am going to do to Mr. Pogo in broad daylight!..But really, if we’re being honest, I’ve been enjoying this break (puts arm around Beulah)...you know what I mean, Tommy Dreamer?...By the way, it seems like you’ve disappeared off the face of the earth after Heyman dropped your ass *EXACTLY* like I said he would, Tommy…now Paul’s a pimple on Dusty’s ass…Seems like nobody knows where the hell you are, Dreamer!…After I bury Pogo, Tommy, I’m going door to door and dragging your ass out next! *Cuts back to Kris and Dave* Kris Kross: A Skid Row Street Fight Deathmatch?! Dave Meltzer: That could potentially be a huge legal liability for W*ING USA. I have, like, no clue how they’re going to do this in public legally. Kris Kross: That’s the excitement and chaos that fans pay to see, Dave! Let’s get to ring action now, Dr. Wagner Jr. is coming out for the Turbo Violence tournament and we’re about to see who his opponent will be! Match - 1st Round Turbo Violence Champion tournament: Dr. Wagner Jr. Vs. ???? *Dr. Wagner Jr.’s theme plays - “Bad Medicine” by Bon Jovi* Meltzer: Wagner could run for Mayor of Los Angeles. The fans, I think, are really responding to him. Kris Kross: Let’s see who the opponent is…. *Homicide’s theme plays - “Rest In Piss” by Brotha Lynch Hung* Homicide enters through the curtain wearing bandanas across his face and head. Meltzer: That is Homicide from Jersey All Pro Wrestling. Very, very hardcore guy…but he’s got some lucha offense as well. Homicide is not a stranger to barbed wire either. The bell rings and the match begins. Homicide starts punching Wagner and tosses him into the corner. Wagner spins Homicide around and delivers forearms to Homicide in the corner! Homicide rakes the eyes under Wagner’s mask and gets issued a warning by referee Steve Corino. Kris Kloss: Disqualifications and count outs are enforced under Turbo Violence rules! During the match, the camera pans into the Raven’s Nest seated in the front row. Raven, Vampiro, Virus and Luna Vachon are together looking miserable. Kris Kloss: It appears our cameras have picked up that Raven is front row at W*ING USA! With Vampiro? Luna Vachon!? This has the makings of a new Flock in W*ING USA! Meltzer: We’ve certainly had um, a major, major influx of former ECW talent coming into W*ING USA. The match continues inside the ring as Wagner hits a snap suplex on Homicide and controls the match. Homicide is shot into the ropes and takes a big back body drop! Wagner goes for an O’Connor roll and gets two! Homicide reaches into his boot and pulls out an ice pick! Corino immediately attempts to grab the pick away from Homicide! Homicide shoves Corino! As Corino turns to retrieve the ice pick in the ring, Homicide hits a low blow on Wagner! Homicide nails the Cop Killa (Vertebreaker) on Wagner! 1…2…3! Homicide advances! Winner: Homicide Kris Kloss: Homicide is moving on to face the Great Sasuke in the 2nd round of the Turbo Violence tournament! After the match, Homicide hits referee Corino with a Cop Killa! Corino is not moving! Meltzer: Totally uncalled for, Kris, y’know, really ridiculous by Homicide. Poor Corino isn’t moving at all. Kris Kloss: Homicide is an outlaw who will do anything to win! We’re gonna get some help for Corino out here. The Great Sasuke has a fight on his hands in round two! On a lighter note, after we take a break, we’re going to be right back with W*ING USA’s first ever bikini contest to crown Miss. W*ING USA!! Meltzer: (sighs) *Break* Kris Kloss: Folks, we’re back at it and Dave Meltlzer is already in the ring with Kimona Wanalana for our first bikini contest! Inside the ring are eight sexy women of all races in large W*ING USA t-shirts on and high heels. Meltzer is holding cue cards and the crowd is ready for eye candy! Crowd: DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! Kimona: Hey guuuyys!! Are you ready to crown our first Miss. W*ING USA!?!? (crowd pops). *Bikini Contest theme plays - “Cherry Pie” by Warrant* Meltzer: Um, alright…By the way, you know, this isn’t really my thing, this was Onita’s idea…But uh, first up we’ve got Veronica…Let’s see, um…She’s from San Diego and it says here she has modeled for Hustler magazine. Warrant is blaring through the loudspeaker as Veronica takes off the shirt and reveals a bright pink thong! Kimona: Whoooo! Yeah! Come on, guys! Work it, girl! Veronica twirls around as Meltzer announces the next contestant. Meltzer: Alright guys, so… *All of a sudden* Aja Kong, Shark Tsuchya, and Combat Toyoda rush into the ring! The bikini girls all attempt to flee the ring and chaos breaks out! Aja grabs Veronica and throws her down onto the canvas! W*ING security immediately tries to reestablish order! "Cherry Pie" continues to play! Meltzer and Kimona hurry out of the ring! As the fighting continues, one of the bikini girls emerges from the pile with a bloody nose and one of her breasts exposed! Kris Kloss: Yikes! I don’t know if that gets past the censors! This show is Rated R! Hopefully they signed a waiver! Kong, Shark and Combat are butchering these women! This is like a horror scene from JAWS!! Megumi Kudo, Alundra Blayze, and Moolah head to the ring and begin to brawl with Kong, Shark and Combat! Moolah bashes Aja Kong over the head with her purse and Aja Kong collapses to the canvas! Moolah opens the purse up and a huge BRICK falls out of it!!! Crowd: Moolah!! Moolah!! Moolah!! Kong is bleeding as she exits the ring with Shark and Combat. Victor Quinones is waiting for them at the top of the entrance. Kris Kloss: We need to get everybody calmed down here! We’re gonna go to footage with Cobra, “Real Nature Boy” Buddy Landel and “Double” CW Anderson and their attempt to confront their “former boss” Eric Bischoff at Universal Studios! Next we are shown Cobra, Buddy Landel and CW Anderson standing in front of the entrance at Universal Studios Hollywood. All three are dressed in full ring gear like they are ready for a match at the theme park. Cobra: If you guys hadn’t been eliminated in the battle royal we wouldn’t be here right now! YEOOOWW!!! Buddy: You’re the one that was thrown out in thirty seconds! WHOOOOO!!!! Cobra, Landel and Anderson approach the ticket booth where a young female employee is seated behind glass. Buddy Landel: Sweetheart, we’re here to see Bischoff!! Female Employee: Bischoff? Sir, I don’t know who you are referring to…This is a ticket window to purchase entry into Universal Studios. Cobra: Exactly! Universal Studios where WCW tapes Saturday Night! Female Employee (confused): Sir, I really think you might be at the wrong location. Landel: Baby, we’re about to go to Space Mountain! How about you let us see your supervisor Eric Bischoff? Female Employee (agitated): That’s Disney World! And I don't have a manager by that name! Just then Landel notices a heavyset man wearing a WCW shirt behind them in line. Landel steps out of line and accosts the tourist. Landel: Hey Fatso! WCW?! Where the hell is Bischoff?! Tourist: Hey Buddy, I’m just a fan…I don’t know where Bischoff is…They tape the show in Orlando, Florida…There’s two Universal Studios… Cobra: What?! Are you kidding? How the hell can we afford to get out there?! YEEEOOWW!!!! Landel: ORLANDO FLORIDA?! Landel aggressively removes the tourist’s sneaker and tosses it into the parking lot, almost hitting a family in line!! Landel: QUIT JERKING US AROUND, JACK! YOU’RE LOOKING AT THE BRAINS! (Points at Cobra vacantly grinning) AND THE NUCLEUS! (Points at Anderson holding up three fingers the entire time) Tourist: Have you been drinking, Buddy? Can somebody call security please?! Security is alerted and Cobra and his companions get questioned. Security: Can any of you provide ID? Anderson holds up three fingers. Security: I said, do you have any identification? Anderson: You’re looking at it! These fingers are the symbol of excellence in professional wrestling! Security: We’re asking the three of you to leave the premises, you’re banned from the park. Cobra: Technically, we’re a trio! Cobra, Landel, and Anderson walk away. Cobra: Dammit!…let’s go talk to Onita and see if we can get our jobs back! YEOOOWWW!!! *Cuts back to Kloss and Meltzer* Kloss (laughs): Well that was something else, wasn’t it, Dave? Meltzer (shaking his head): Um, unbelievable…really crazy stuff. Kloss: Are they coming back to the W*ING Warehouse? Will they ever give up? Meltzer: They seem totally delusional, possibly mentally ill, I’m not sure what is going on. Kloss: That brings us to our main event of the evening. An opportunity is at stake for a fourth team to enter WarGames and become the first W*ING USA Trios Champions. This match will feature the team of New Jack, Balls Mahoney, and Mikey Whipwreck versus Gladiator Mike Awesome, Crash the Terminator, and Bash the Terminator! Trios WarGames Qualifying Match: New Jack/Balls Mahoney/Mikey Whipwreck Vs. Gladiator Mike Awesome/Crash the Terminator/Bash the Terminator *New Jack’s theme plays - “Natural Born Killaz” by Dr. Dre ft. Ice Cube* New Jack leads the way with an acoustic guitar he is strumming with Mahoney and Whipwreck behind him. The crowd pops as the trio enter the squared circle. New Jack quickly walks over and grabs a microphone. New Jack: What’s up, hoes?! Crowd: New Jack! New Jack! New Jack! New Jack: So I guess it’s finally time for this *bleep* New Jack to talk!….It’s been a hot minute since ECW died…Of course it did without me and these bastards behind me!...Paul E., you wanna blame New Jack for your loss? Eat shit, Paul, you’ve been reduced to Pillman’s fuckin’ manager! How’s Dusty’s muffler taste, Paul? Crowd: DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! DIE FOR WING! New Jack: And you got the audacity to call yourself the NWA?! NWA?! Paul E. you restarted the NWA but you forgot this *bleep* with attitude!!! Crowd: New Jack! New Jack! New Jack! New Jack: As far as Fat Ass Transit goes, Eric Gulash, Kulash, or whatever the fuck that fat white boy name was!…You’re lucky you’re still breathing, kid! All I do is carve up motherfuckers for a living! Now bring out Awesome and the Terminators, let’s fucking go! *Gladiator Mike Awesome’s theme plays - "Sum of Your Achivements" by Nailbomb* Kris Kloss: It sounds like Gladiator has a new theme song! Awesome and the Terminators run out to the ring and the match immediately begins. Crash and Bash both have Road Warrior styled face paint, along with Gladiator who has black paint around his eyes for the match. New Jack bashes Awesome with the guitar right off the bell! A lot of brawling as they pair off. Crash and Bash take turns powerbombing Whipwreck. New Jack and Balls Mahoney go to work on Awesome. New Jack picks up a monitor and hits Awesome!! Crash decks Balls with clothesline from behind. Things go back and forth throughout. The Terminators hit back to back moonsaults on Mahoney inside the ring. Awesome attempts a massive frog splash onto a table but New Jack moves out of the way! Balls grabs a chair and full force drives it into Bash’s skull. Bash totally no sells it! Balls throws an even harder shot and Bash goes down!! In the closing moments, Luna Vachon jumps the guard rail from the Raven’s Nest! Luna leaps onto Crash’s back trying to choke him out!! Kris Kloss: It didn’t take long for Luna to cross the line! As Crash struggles to get Luna off, New Jack grabs Crash’s head and shoots it with a staple gun! Balls follows it up with a *MASSIVE* chair shot to Crash! Whipwreck hits the Whippersnapper on Crash!! New Jack pins Crash the Terminator to secure the fourth spot in WarGames at Bloodstar! Winner: New Jack/Balls Mahoney/Mikey Whipwreck Kris Kloss: Folks, what just happened there? Is the Flock aligned with ECW? Why did Luna get involved on their behalf?! Hopefully we will have answers for you later this month at Bloodstar! Good night!
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As usual, the figures really stole the show and stirred up a lot of childhood memories for me. One Easter in particular, I remember I got the LoD Hasbro two pack. That was a memorable gift and I thought they were very rare at the time after waiting years for Hawk and Animal in Hasbro form (I had the Remco AWA versions). Playing with figures and dolls is such a profound part of child development and you can observe a lot from it in how we built our society. Concerning the show itself, I wouldn't doubt these are actual results from that era.
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National Wrestling Alliance (August 1996 - ????)
MLB replied to Perfectly Straightedge's topic in Programming
Very complete episode and covered a lot of the featured wrestlers. Appears that we've got 123 Kid, Meng, Hennig, MVC, Dibiase, Douglas and Pillman established on the heel side. With Kid's surprise attack on Dusty, as a reader I can't help but think Kevin Nash isn't too far behind. It leads me to wonder who "the third man" is, if such a scenario is unfolding. Will Savage turn on Dusty? On the babyface side, we've got Scorpio, RVD, Rocky Mavia, Piper and the Thrillseekers. Definitely fair balance between the two sides. -
Good show, I like how you're gradually rolling everything out. I did not expect to see Sid as a babyface, he seems more Justice than Psycho. We didn't really see Sid as a face much, I dig seeing characters go in alternate directions. I laughed so hard at Sunny with the referee, "not sexually distracting him, just whining a lot." Speaking of Sunny days, HBK is going to be an underdog babyface champion against monsters like Vader and Mankind, with Ultimate Warrior in line as well. We haven't seen Razor or Bret yet, and I like that you're patient while establishing TV first. There's a lot of setup that goes into the early stages of the project. Good to have some basic squashes with Austin and HHH just to give an idea of how their gimmicks will be depicted.
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Glad you picked up on this, Meltzer being a fish out of water is a running joke throughout the shows. On the next W*ING TV, Meltzer will be hosting a bikini contest, and you can imagine that's not exactly his element. It's all a rib by Onita, but Meltzer also provides "insider" knowledge that I want to convey on the program. Then you have Vic Venom aka Vince Russo joining commentary soon and it's about to get a lot more uncomfortable for Uncle Dave!