Matt D

Hey, it's the WWE HOF Inductees, the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders.

I kind of think that Shaq should have won that.

You poor bastard.

Corbin is such an anti-smark. He just eliminated 1991 indy darling Chris Chavis.

He looks in great shape. DDP looked like he busted a hip doing the diamond cutter.

I never knew I wanted a DDP vs Tatanka match so badly.

Thank god. The Battle Royal. Battle Royals are fun. There might be something good left in the world. How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end it's only a passing thing this shadow, even darkness must pass. A new day will come, and when the sun shines it'll shine out the clearer. EDIT: Ok, that's cool.

I've never been happier to hear Lita's dulcet tones.

WM is in Texas. I wish they had just shown Kerry vs Dino Bravo from WM VII 8 times instead. No, because then we'd have to use that match to explain it and once they finish giving Shane his WM III cart ride to the back, I'm never going to think about it again.

Whatever Batista would have decided to wear for metrosexual ref gear would have made that so much better.

That match made me want to leave and go home. And I am home.

If ever a thirty minute match should have been a three second gif.

Now Terry Funk's going to come out, right? That's how this works?

How many robots died so they could get the metal to make that cage?

Can someone recommend some TNA matches to me?

Well, we have a new winner for most embarrassing thing ol' Mark's ever done. Previous winner:

This is reaching Chikara level of awkward performance art.

I love that we still have the Ascension to come tonight!

Ok I've got an idea. What about a zombie Test hologram? Is that bad taste?

Shane should have been in a mixed Stardust tag. That's about his level.

I wonder what Will and Pete are doing right now.

I'm sorry, ok? I'll take Seth Rollins back.

I just finished the women's match (motn, but that's not saying a ton. great women's lib finish. It'd be one thing if they were going to play it up as helping to ruin the new belt's moment, but they'll try to have it both ways). I jumped ahead to live and I have no fucking idea why this is on my screen. What a baffling major match. Even for the senior PGA tour match of the night. And I turned it on right for the god damn snake eyes no sell back elbow goofball thing. What a world.

Playing Catch up. Cole's lack of genuine emotion for the Ryder win was brutal.

I am still at the supermarket doing the weekly shopping. This has to be the least consequential Mania ever.