Dav'oh

Couple of smartly-worked openers which didn't try to steal the show. Refreshing.

There once was a lady from Lunt - no, that's not it... LET US GO!!!! That's it.

If we're talking proximity, acting is even closer to pro-wrestling, but we're not counting Cena's Hollywood career. They're secondary careers; I think most would take the poll question as who had the better pro-wrasslin' career. PWO, 'n all.

Were the latter two long-term, money-drawing feuds? My addled brain thinks of those as one-offs. Hardy vs Hardy was a bust. Thankfully we never saw Valiant vs Valiant. Mulkey vs Mulkey would've drawn - cents, not dollars, but it still would've drawn.

Counterpoint? Highly-experienced 30 and 40 year-olds are savvy enough to know the fans gobble this shit up, with relish, and are putting the slow burn on it.

Yes. In the same way that Secretariat and a shetland pony share physical characteristics.

No offence taken, good brother. Listening to the noise 25,000 Brits make at Edgbaston watching the staid, gentlemanly, game of cricket gave me great hope for what 80,000 of the great unwashed will sound like at Wembley.

Michaels did do parity mat-wrestling with an Olympic Gold medallist in their * WrestleMania match. *Insert your own adjectives, he said, diplomatically. He sees a handsome, "undersized", highly talented worker (I never said he was shite, just that he looked like a corpse on a slab in a morgue in an episode of CSI). He sees a guy who you think is cute, you know is sexy, and is most certainly not your boy toy (boy toy).

Nah, I don't think that's "body-shaming". Does he look ashamed out there in his undies? I doubt he reads AEW TV 6/14-6/17 at PWO, anyway. I don't think he's sobbing into Britt's tits of an evening 'cos some dickhead called Dav'oh wants to buy him 3lb ladies' dumbbells to get him started. It's a (tele)visual medium and thus an aesthetic one. We can't pretend Cole looks good. Or Keith Lee, who went straight on my Dead Pool after that very good 8-man the other night (I put a step-count on him. 40ish steps for the match.)

Who's going to get themselves over to that level, and who will be hand-picked by the office, are probably two different questions.

"I say, young cock. This promoter feller does think it would be spiffing if you and I, we, pretend to engage in fisticuffs and rough-housery. What say you?" "Splendid! A capital idea! Does Sunday the next suit you, sir?" "I have cleared my engagements and very much look forward to our impending encounter. A good day to you, sir." "Wonderful!" You laugh at that but no-sell my opus, "We Didn't Start the Diving" like nearly every other motherfucker in this godforsaken place I'm turning heel.

What are the alternatives? "You called my daddy yellow?" "I'm in this business for one reason only - that title!" Everyone's all "he shouldn't say this, he shouldn't say that", well, what should he be saying? People are just pooh-poohing without offering anything constructive. The irony is that he's PWO's no.1 heel.

I like to think he tried to put the camel clutch on that jabroni Death. RIP to a true great.

Nah. The crowd don't hate him. The great heels engendered visceral hatred. People laugh and smile when they boo Dom.

I wasn't gonna let Billy fuggen Joel beat me. Here's 170 years of wrestling in 276 words. If you squint your ears (...?), it's to the tune of We Didn't Start the Fire. Sing along if you know the words. Sorry, wouldn't let me spoiler it for length. Hippodroming, Lincoln myth, wagering begets the fix, Stranglers Lewis one and two, the Dusek Brothers four. Frank Gotch, Hackenschmidt, Jack Pfefer loves the freaks, Assirati, Gama Singh, Huns and Turks galore. Fall Guys, expose the biz, figure-fours, Irish Whips, Toots Mondt, Dick Shikat, titles won in barns. St. Louis, Sonnenburg, crotch-holds, Pinky George, Kay Fabe, Wrigley Field, the patriarch McMahon. Dive! Buddy Rogers, MSG, Chicago Wrestling on TV, Anti-Trust, French Catch, Ted the Wrestling Bear. Pat O'Connor, Dory Dixon, families 'round the television, Amarillo, Honololu, Gorgeous George's hair. Kangaroos, Lou Thesz, Argentine Titanes, Ninety-minute Texas Death, Alabama, crooked ref. Sammartino, Brylcream, Moolah is the new Queen, Walt Kowalski, Reg Lisowski, Hatpin Mary, Santo. Dive! Ivan Koloff, Ernie Roth, Fritz von Erich, Rousimoff, Wilmington, Valentine, Skull Murphy suicide. (Spoiler), Crippler, Ed Farhat, Ramblin' Ricky, Ernie Ladd, Marlin, Bass, Heather Feather, Ali and Inoki "fight". Dive! Expansion Era, Puerto Rico, Ken Patera, goodbye Gino, Allen Collins, meatball sub, the Brawl to End it All. Bill Dixon, Sergeant Slaughter, Bruiser Brody, Cyndi Lauper, Face-paint, Zubaz pants, Jimmy Cornette's fall. Zane Breslov, Tiger Mask, Terry Allen, Otto Wanz. Ravishing. Beautiful. Perfect. Adorable. Egyptian Yeti, Sunny Days, Bingo Hall, Beefcake's face, Davey Metzger, ham 'n' eggers, Pillman's got a gun. Wolfpack, Bah Gawd, thumbtacks, Montreal, Super Juniors, Yokozuna, Stun, Austin, Stun. Dive! Red Acted, Steiner Math, Thuganomics, Johnny Cash, Messiah, God, birth of Punk, Christy Hemme and Aries' junk. Rocky, Socko, Federline, terror on the airlines, Misawa's death, Puder's chest, Ayatollah Blassie rests. Forty WrestleManias, titles change in stadia, Golden Lovers, feelin' Ucey, set yourself on fire. Adderall, freshly squeezed, Logan Paul, Wemberley, Vince McMahon's new moustache? Suffering Succotash! Dive! (x3)

32 wrestlers in this year's G1, so that means guernseys for Yota Tsuji, Mikey Nicholls, Hikuleo and Tanga Loa, amongst other lesser-lights. Eddie Kingston is in; Kaito Kiyomiya, too.

No, LMAO. How is "this cunt looks stupid, regardless of who he's meant to be", concern trolling? I mean, I'm not concerned and I'm not trolling. @The Thread Killer First issue's coverstory: "Why Roman Reigns MUST Dress As Inspector Clouseau at Summerslam!"

Well, he didn't look like a star. He looked like a joke - apt, I know, because he was honoring a spoof character from 50 years ago. Don't have to be a "boomer" to think he looked jobber-ific. And if you didn't know who he was "honouring", he just looked stupid, to boot. And even when one found out who he was meant to be...he still looked stupid.

The coats are military, the way they stand is military, and I get nervous about a German man addressing 20,000 people with a microphone

We humans really are a death cult. I was expecting Ellery Queen to pop up at the end of the Benoit episode and say, "I know who did it...do you?"

How quickly we forget the Bolsheviks...

I shouldn't pop for thumbtack spots at my age but that was a good one.

Someone gave Mox a dirty look and he started bleeding.

Good stuff. They're all still under-seasoned but they put on a fun match.

Crowd math: 4 minutes + 5 dives = This Is Awesome!