WWECW

[El-P]

Episode 15.

 

Interesting special guest this wekk, with King Booker facing RVD. On paper it looked like a disater of a match, and surprisingly it was actually pretty decent, despite RVD actively sucking on offense, as it's often the case. I have no idea if Booker became better with age, but I enjoyed him here more than I did during his overrated single WCW stint. And the King Booker gimmick seems to be gold.

 

CM Punk squashed Shannon Moore again, but this time Moore got a little bit more offense, and also looked worse in the process. Kelly Kelly wants CM Punk, it's obvious. Her jealous boyfriend Mike Knox teamed with Test & Matt Striker, who's sporting the gayest outfit I've seen since, well, since Rene Dupree's debut the previous week. Striker works a decent chickenshit act though, and we're building to the moment the Sandman will cane him. The match against Sandman, Dreamer & Sabu, again, was watchable, but Test really brings nothing to the table at all. More generic big roided guy I canno't think of.

 

And finally, we get Twilight Boy vs Balls Mahoney in a short match of the freaks, which took a backseat to the fact Francine was there working with Balls. You know how it ended up. "Catfight !!!!". I think she showed up twice before she got released (or asked to be released). I think they mentionned she hadn't been on TV in 6 years, which means TNA doesn't exist.

 

Not the worst episode, as there wasn't anything offensively bad, and the main event was actually kinda, good, considering who was involved. And King Booker walking around the locker room was kinda funny. Seems like the best Booker T gimmick ever, and Sharmell looked quite good in her role too.

 

2006.09.19 King Booker vs RVD

[El-P]

Episode 16 finally has another match I really enjoyed : RVD vs Hardcore Holly began on shaky legs, because of RVD's awful work (really, why did he begin to use clotheslines since he looks worse than Lex Luger throwing those around ?), but slowly developped into what I'd call a very good (for RVD) match, with the help of an impressive performance by Holly who badly cut his back after an insane spot outside the ring (the one criticism I have is that they cut to commercials right after the spot, not too smart). One of the most gross injury I've seen this side of FMW, really, blood was pouring of a large gash. Holly's selling was excellent, and he was almost babyface like here to the point he got a round of applause after the match. He was the glue that hold the match together too. RVD must be the shittiest wrestler to have so many good matches, because of what he can bring to the table in term of bumping and impressive spots. What a paradox.

 

Big Show vs Sandman wasn't too bad for a Big Show match, as Sandman's energy and selling (again), kept me interested throughout, despite Show's boring offense. Show's sole strong point to me is his demeanor, if he had the execution and offense to go along, he would be fine. But the truth is, I wish I had The One Man Gang in all those matches instead. Matt Striker screws Sandman by taking his cane away. Earlier in the show, Striker had been caned by JR (we're in Tulsa, amazing that JR didn't get humiliated instead) with the help of the Sandman. Continuity.

 

With a watchable main event and a really good match (which took some time), I can't complain too much about a useless catfight between Ariel & Francine. I do think it's Francine's last appearance on a TV wrestling show (she made that ECW nostalgia show when she was pregnant as hell later). Good for her that she left the business and got herself a family like she wanted. We get an interaction backstage between CM Punk & Mike Knox, of course about Kelly. Guys talking about women like they own them always bothers me (in 2006, jeeez), but CM Punk is obviously the most interesting guy in the promotion on the mic too, thanks to his strong personnality. Extreme strip poker in two weeks. Really ?

 

2006.09.26 Hardcore Holly vs RVD

[topropepodcast]

Holly considers that his best match, FWIW.

[El-P]

Episode 17 was probably one of the most enjoyable overall. No really bad stuff. Big Show & Matt Striker vs Sandman & Sabu was a perfectly watchable short tag match, and the Big Show is a lot more tolerable in this format. I like Striker's chickenshit work. He finally falls into the hands of the Sandman here. Way too short to amount into anything though, but way too short to have the Big Show really ruin the party also.

 

Tommy Dreamer vs Twilight Boy was also a perfectly acceptable Thunder match, I wish I'd see more of fat Dreamer. Thorne still isn't striking me are particulary menacing, but I love Ariel and the bat pose. The vampires steal the win. This is a feud I could live with.

 

CM Punk squashed Danny Doring, all of this being just a backdrop for the angle following the match : Kelly wants to dance for Punk, but Knox prevents her to do so and threatens Punk. This is also a feud I can live with, as I like both guys, and Knox as a jealous boyfriend is muhc better than Brian Lawler (not hard)

 

Much to my surprise, RVD vs Test in an extreme rules match was actually…. good. I mean it's clearly a gimmick shots bomb throwing match, for for what it is, it's way better than it had the right to be, as I don't care for either of these two. They of course did some ugly looking things as far as basics goes (punches, some comebacks, with RVD being the worst at it acually), but in term of working around garbage spots, it was quite good, as they teased the same spot that injured Holly the previous weeks, did some interesting counters that actually made sense (I was already sighing at the contrived set-ups at time only to have the spot being countered, which is always a nice surprise), and sold well. RVD's Rolling Thunder onto the steel steps outside looked amazing, this guy is such a strange beast. Really pleasantly surprised by this, and Test was doing all the right stuff. Of course I have no faith in them having a good match without the gimmicks, but for what it was, and despite the annoying Heyman's security (I hate this kind of gimmick) running in at one point, it was quite good.

 

Next week, Extreme Strip Poker. Maria Kanellis apparently plays a airhead, so that makes her the Dawn Marie of the show.

 

2006.10.03 : RVD vs Test.

[goc]

I was worried you might have given up. Well you've made it through 4 months now so in 17 more episodes you should be getting to the part where I think you might start enjoying it

[El-P]

Episode 18 was all about Extreme Strip Poker, so the matches were regularly cut off but split screens, which made them hard to follow, and there was no angles at all during the show.

 

CM Punk vs Rene Dupree was another semi-competitive squash, and Dupree looked better this time around, doing some really good bumping and dropkicks. Joey Styles did the same stupid xenophobic joke that I guess he'll do every fucking time Dupree gets in the ring. How creative.

 

Tommy Dreamer vs Twilight Boy could have been a good match but it looked even more rushed than the last one (no idea if it actually was shorter) and there's not much you can amount too working in such a short timing. They go 1-1.

 

Then the main event was a decent Big Show (looking that the worst King Kong Bundy ever with no hair nor beard) & Test & Matt Striker vs RVD & Sabu & Sandman. The match was at its best when Sabu was selling for the heels, especially Test and Striker, whose work I definitely enjoy. He's a bit like a modern Billy Joe Travis. Sandman doesn't bring much anymore, especially without the gimmicks, and RVD does what RVD does in a routine match.

 

But since the show was all about the Strip Poker (which didn't even look like a poker game at all), hosted by Balls Mahoney (who else ?), I'll be remiss if I didn't mention that having the girls already look like a bunch of strippers wearing too much makeup and acting like stereotypical bitches kinda negated the whole purpose of having a strip poker game, ya know. Trinity and Candice Mitchell didn't look attractive at all and didn't display any character either. Maria Kanellis played the airhead and looks much better these days, although she was clearly the third hottest one here. Really, Kelly Kelly looked the most genuine and cute of them all, while Crystal won me over by dropping a Kelis line. Ashley Massaro was part of the fun too, is she the one who ended up doing some escort jobs later ? She, if not, she probably should have judging by her outfit here. Kelly did remove her top but of course hid her boobs the remaining time, while Candice and Maria endend up "naked" (which was blurred, but I'm pretty positive they weren't actually naked) catfighting all over the place. All in all, a pretty stupid segment, with its share of hypocritical sex baiting and mix of vulgar yet prudish behaviour (a bunch of girls acting like strippers, shaking their ass and throwing high heels and stocking onto balls, yet acting grossed out by the idea that Mahoney got a hard-on, which was only eluded to in a semi-comical way anyway… oh, America… )

 

I'm all for T&A, but this episode was really kinda stupid and the decent looking matches looked like a complete afterthought. Ariel doing her bat routine was more sexy than the entire Strip Poker debacle.

[El-P]

Episode 19

 

More of the same. A CM Punk vs Rene Dupree rematch, same lenght, same result. Dupree looked pretty good again, so maybe I was too harsh on his debut. Test vs Balls Mahoney was watchable, and Sabu squashed Shannon Moore, who's a total jobber, he gets less offense than Barry Horowitz on Wrestling Challenge.

 

The main event was a bad RVD vs Big Show match. Show is even worst than RVD, who at least brings *something* to the table even if it's not good most of the time. Show is just awful. Can't even drop a decent looking elbow, can't sell for shit. This ECW run makes him look like one of the worst big man ever to get a major run anywhere. RVD wins thanks to Holly throwing some wicked chair shots to the head. In 2006. So we get a title match next wekk. Oh, great.

 

The best match of the show was actually Sandman vs Matt Striker in a "singapur cane on a pole" match. Wasn't much, but at least everything made sense : Striker attacks Sandman's right knee to prevent him from getting up the pole, uses a nice throw to send him off the tope rope, gets the cane, gets a few shots in before the miss, Sandman gets his cane back and beats the shit out of Striker until he bleeds and chickenshits out of the ring. For what it was, it was perfectly executed, so yeah, I'd go so far to call it a good match. Especially in this setting where only the main event gets any time.

 

I'm so sick of promo clips of "The Marine" every damn weak too. It's been going on forever. And then, we get a new backstage interviewer, Rebeca DiPietro, who's hot and all.

 

2006.10.17 Matt Striker vs Sandman

[The Chief]

For whatever reason, I hate ECW-era Shannon Moore more than any gimmick in wrestling history.

[El-P]

I'm so tired of this show. Episode 20 was the worse in a long time. It speaks volume of the creative slump this company and even Heyman were when the only idea they had for the main feud at the top was "heel authority". (of course it's even sadder that it's still the case in 2015). So we get RVD vs Big Show in a ladder match to get the contract. Terrible match. Contrived, sloppy as hell, with a bunch of ladder shots we've seen a zillions times, only done badly thanks to Show's ineptness. Seriously, he's just terrible, and putting him in a ladder match makes him look even worse. So, RVD wins because ladder matches are his specialty (which makes Heyman looks like an idiot to begin with). So I guess we get another bad match between those too.

 

Hardcore Holly vs Test was a dull, sloppy affair, that got some "boring" chants. Holly is solid, but he's not a guy who will carry a guy like Test in a straight match. Some terrible looking transitions, and the added cherry on the cake of the awful WWE production which sabotaged the only big spot in the match : after a suplex from the apron to the outside by Holly, cut to commercials, and Test in control in a resthold when they get back. Clap clap clap. Anyway. Not good. Holly still displays zero charisma at this point of his career despite working his best gimmick, and it shows when he's working babyface.

 

CM Punk vs Matt Striker was easily the match of the night, with nice chain wrestling exchange at the beginning and some pretty smooth work on both part (although some high kicks by Punk look kinda odd, in a Mima Shimoda way). I dig Striker's tights and kneepads, always matching his ridiculous argyle sweaters. That's a cool touch. Match got interupted by Mike Knox, but no Kelly Kelly that week. There has been no diva on sight since the Strip Poker episode, maybe they figured they went a little bit too far so they cooled down the sex factor for a while.

[El-P]

Episode 21. WWECW is Halloween. And it'll play a part in the show.

 

Best (only good) match of the show is a qualifying match for the Elimination Chamber at December to Dismember, Sabu vs Kevin Thorne. Total sprint, as they weren't given any time, but the action was good and well executed, with some impressive looking spots like Thorne catching Sabu in a short powerbomb or Sabu doing an amazing tornado DDT from a springboard. I like the fact Ariel is active and screaming like Woman or Sherri were. Best Twilight Boy match thus far.

 

We get the debut of, gasp, Daivari with the Great Khali. More quality talent on this show, like it lacked any. Daivari seems to suck just as much as he does these days on LU, but we'll see. Here he squashes poor Shannon Moore. The Sandman canes a clown backstage, because it's Halloween.

 

Return of the Divas, with a costume contest. Well, it was actually pretty well done in that Ariel wore the exact same outfit that she wears everyday, since she's a freak who dresses like it's Halloween all the time. Trinity wears, well, pretty much nothing apart from a yellow crime scene tape over her boobs, so of course she wins. That's also only the third time she appears on this show since the beginning. And the fun part was Kelly Kelly, who actually had a costume, as she dressed up like CM Punk, complete with fake tatoos on her arms and belly. Of course, Mike Knox isn't happy and CM punk comes out to beat his ass, while Kelly just seems half apologetic-half amused. You know, Kelly's character actually grows on me a bit because there's something likeable about her, she looks like a genuine hot 19 year old girl who doesn't see what's the big deal about all of this and just has fun. Which is kinda refreshing.

 

Main event of Big Show & Test vs RVD & Hardcore Holly was pretty bad at first during the long stretch of Test working, then got almost good during the heat on Holly and the finishing stretch after the hot tag, although Big Show did the worst Vader bomb ever (not that he ever did that spot well). So yeah, almost got good for a moment, but the shit finish with Heyman disguised as a gorilla costing RVD the match was really stupid. Ah, those wacky Halloween wrestling shows...

 

2006.10.31 Sabu vs Kevin Thorne

[Jimmy Redman]

For a second I read "Halloween" and got all excited for you to review the MONSTER MASH BATTLE ROYAL, then I remembered that wasn't until 2007.

 

Only 52 more weeks to go!

[El-P]

This "promotion" truly is terrible. Episode 22 has a decent CM Punk vs Mike Knox match, but nothing I'd go as far as call "good", because it was too rushed to amount to anything, and was kinda sloppy at times. And yeah, not as good as Sabu vs Thorne as far as complete rush-job goes. Kelly was sent to the back, which makes sense.

 

Apart from that, Daivari squashed Little Guido, which is idiotic since he has nothing to offer (I mean really, no look, no distinct ability, no nothing unique apart from speaking farsi). Yeah, Guido has to bump for Khali too, that's something I really want to see. Tommy Dreamer vs Test was the usual piss poor Test quickie. Elijah Burke & Sylverster Terkay are coming soon. I actually remember Terkay's name from Z1, where he was doing some Brody gimmick. It eluded me that he ever was in WWE.

 

And then an atrocious main event with RVD & Holly vs Big Show & … Paul Heyman. The work sucked, the "storyline" sucked (really, RVD can't do one freaking tag although he succeeded in beating Show twice already in the previous weeks ?) and you could smell the oh-so-not-surprising and Russoesque swerve at the end, with Holly turning on RVD. This whole WWECW stuff in the worst thing Heyman was ever involved with and truly is a black mark on his resume.

[Matt D]

I love WWECW and I've never seen any of the stuff you've written about here (I've seen the zombie, I think!).

[goc]

WWECW is really one of my favorite WWE things over the last decade. But I didn't watch any of this stuff either. I didn't start watching until the ECW after Mania 27. By then they had pretty much stopped being anything but a 3rd brand (no more trying to pretend it's a continuation of real ECW) and once it fully developed into being the bridge between developmental and Raw/Smackdown I thought it really hit it's groove.

[NotJayTabb]

Looking at these recaps, I'd forgotten how much tat came before the good stuff. Thankfully, after the hilarious December To Dismember, Heyman leaves and you start hitting the good stuff. By 2008, ECW had lost the terrible originals and great stuff like Ripper Burchill, the Dudebusters and Ricky Ortiz's rally towel were taking centre stage.

[Stiva]

Hang tight, El-P. By my reckoning, you're about 4 shows away from Big Show and Heyman leaving and 10 shows away from The New Breed beginning where the show actually becomes watchable.

[Jimmy Redman]

To be honest I don't think it becomes watchable as a good show until late 2008 when you have a core roster of Matt, Henry, Finlay and Miz & Morrison.

 

2007 has good points like that 8-man tag and Punk's rise to the title, but it's still not particularly good as a week to week show. Especially coming in cold in hindsight like ElP is.

[goc]

I would STRONGLY disagree with Jimmy Redman. 2007 is a good year starting around May. The Vince McMahon as ECW Champ stuff that takes place before that is a lot of fun if you don't get hung up on 'OMG LOOK WHAT VINCE IS DOING TO THE ECW BELT!" Steve Richards gets a weird mini-push, Big Daddy V shows up, Miz & Morrison start teaming and Colin Delaney starts near the end of 2007.

[(BP)]

2007 is pretty good. Vince as ECW champion is the last big hurrah for the Mr. McMahon character, and I thought it was a lot of fun. There's also WWE's final word ever on Benoit, which is interesting in a historical context. Punk's feuds with Morrison and Chavito are also a good time.

[El-P]

Episode 22. WWECW in the UK.

 

So this time, CM Punk vs Mike Knox was the match they were supposed to have. Got more time, didn't have to rush things. Knox work on Punk's back was quite solid, as was Punk's selling. Rather crisp action compared to the previous time. I really do like Knox's work with an able opponent. Kelly is bumped accidentaly by Know, and of course Punk is the one looking out for her, so she actively cheers for him. I wonder what Test was thinking about all this… Anyway, this turned out to be really good.

 

Main event was Hardcore Holly vs Bobby Lashley. More good talent coming in I see. Well, it was actually better than Holly's match against Test, although I don't think I can say that Lashley is better than Test, but he's more fun to watch in a big hoss/Goldy clone/trainwreck kinda guy. Considering Lashley's scale of talent (can't even throw a decent clothesline, apparently), this was pretty watchable. Ends with a schmooz and Sabu, CM Punk & RVD all jumping in to save Lashley from a beating by Heyman's guys. I guess they're working some kind of Survivor Series match, but I didn't pay attention to the announcers (Elijah Burke replaced Tazz this week, and wasn't bad).

 

Not much else, as if they really didn't pack much of anything, losing some time at the beginning with a useless segment to introduce Lashley vs Holly, and then with Matt Striker promoting the Elimination Chamber match at the PPV. And a bad Daivari vs Dreamer match ending in a DQ and leading to, I guess, a feud that will without a doubt be extremely useless. Well, at least we didn't get any Big Show main event this time, so that's a plus.

 

2006.11.14 CM Punk vs Mike Knox.

[El-P]

Episode 23.

 

Well, this was better. We get the RVD vs Hardcore Holly rematch, and although it was good, it was not nearly as good as the previous one. Mostly used chairs as far as the extreme rules goes, Holly also using a belt to whip RVD a bit. Much more a "classic" RVD match, which means the early part and the comeback were typical RVD spots without much more to it. ONe strange occurence was Holly almost no-selling the Rolling Thunder with a chair, which was odd. So the best part was Holly getting on top with a nice transition (that anyone could see coming because it was logical) and beating up RVD pretty bad. That was the strongest point of the match in term of pacing and building to a comeback. Too bad the comeback didn't look that good (hey, it's RVD).

 

The Hardy Boys reunited after four years apparently, and semi-squashed the FBI in a solid little tag match. It's sad to see the FBI, who seemed just as good as they were in 2000, in that role. I still dislike some of the Hardys spots, as they were the first ones, along with Edge, introducing those indy-looking like moves that just look a bit awkward for nothing (too many body movements or twists to get to the exact same bump as a basic move for the opponent) in the mainstream.

 

CM Punk vs Twilight Fan was short and pretty much a backdrop so we get Kelly showing up and getting into a batfight with Ariel. CM Punk saves her and they hug, to the dismay of Mike Knox looking on. Well, this is a million times better executed than the god awful Brian Lawler vs April awful storyline in TNA (not hard, I know). But really, what was Andrew Martin was thinking about all this, IRL ?

 

Oh yeah, building toward Big Show vs Bobby Lashley, who squashed Matt Striker. And what's striking about Lashley is how non menacing he looks despite his body. Maybe that's the total lack of charisma and personnality, maybe that's his big round baby face, maybe that's the fact he's a Goldy clone without the intensity. Anyway, this promises to be brutal.

 

2006.11.21 RVD vs Bob Holly

[El-P]

"ECW" matches at Survivor Series 2006

 

DX & CM Punk & Hardy Boys vs Edge & Randy Orton & Johnny Nitro & Gregory Helms & Mike Knox.

 

Garbage. Mike Knox superkicked right away. The best action involved Micheals, Nitro & CM Punk, but it was just going through the motions. Basically the heels looked like jobbers, including Edge & Orton, which really surprised me. Micheals doing his heartbreak kid gimmick with his scrawny body, balding hair & crooked eye is one hell of a denial case. Highlight were Kelly & Melina's outfits.

 

John Cena & Kane & RVD & Sabu & Lashley vs Umaga & Big Show & Test & MVP & Finlay.

 

Garbage. Umaga DQed right away. Wait, is this going to be the same crap ? Well, not much better indeed. A bunch of flash pins (RVD, Test & Sabu in about one minute), god awful Show vs Kane action. Cena looks clumsy as hell here, but his selling almost makes Big Show looks tolerable for two minutes. Finlay, midget, yaddi yaddi yadda. Those Survivor Series matches were awful, really.

 

The only guy from the ECW brand looking like a future star was CM Punk. Huge reaction from the Philly crowd (who also loved Show vs Kane, so there goes the "most hardcore city in the US") and the nod by Triple H during the neverending (and embarrassing, to be honest) pre-match routine. Lashley is comical.

 

Looked like a horrible PPV BTW.

[goc]

Aww come on Finlay w/ Hornswoggle was a great act. Finlay worked him into some pretty cool spots, it was only once they made them babyfaces that things went off the rails.

[El-P]

Sorry but no. "Let's give Finaly a dwarf because ya know, he's Irish", is everything I can't stand about WWE in general. Apart from lucha workers, midgets in wrestling are always annoying as hell, especially when they distract from a super worker like Dave Finlay.

[(BP)]

Aww come on, the HBK/Melina spot was fun! Can't wait for the December to Dismember recap. Hope you have a good Le quatorze juillet.