Guest KingPK Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Usually this is the one WWE PPV I look forward to most each year, but I've just gotten so tired of WWE that I barely can give a crap this year. Spoilers from Da Meltz: Unless things have changed in the last day, the main events for Wrestlemania will remain the same as were planned all along (with Angle in the Batista spot). But don't think that helps you predict who wins the Rumble. Anyway, we'll see in a few hours has this transpires. Brian Kendrick vs. Fit Finlay opens the show. Well that sounds like 3:00 of fun. Okay, 2:00 of fun. Emerald frosien for the Finlay win, and no post-match DQ. Lawler ditched the wig he was wearing last Monday. We're opening with a six-way, first pin is cruiserweight champ. Kid Kash, Funaki, Jamie Noble, Nunzio, Paul London and Gregory Helms. A Raw jobber winning the title? Helms pinned Funaki with a shining wizard after Noble had set up Funaki with a reverse lung blower and a dragon sleeper. Lots of missed stuff along with high risk stuff here. All the moves you'd expect and better than average, but you could have had a better match. It's selection time. HHH and Randy Orton are having words. HHH told Orton he doesn't have a chance tonight. Orton liked his number. HHH didn't like is. He's going 50 and still losing I guess. Yay, 50 minutes of HHH tonight. Mickie James told Trish she loves her. Mickie James vs. Ashley is up next. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KingPK Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Mickie James vs. Ashley is up next. They gave them more time than Ric Flair on the last Raw PPV. It was at least passable for 5:00, then it really fell apart and was as bad as you can imagine. James won with a botched power bomb off the ropes and tried to grope Trish, who didn't want to count the pin. Crowd turned on them, and Lawler tried to cover it by saying the crowd is unhappy with Ashley's actions. Victoria is wearing a fishnet shorts from behind. Candice supposedly showed Vince her boob. Big Show got a decent number. Rey and Big Show just shook hands and acted like best of friends. Show said he wished Rey best of luck. Did somebody have amnesia. They talked about how Eddie is going to help Rey choose a good number. It was a bad number and instead Eddie is playing a joke on him. We should have 175 more Eddie mentions before this report is out. And the Boogey Man is next. He beat JBL with a pump handle slam in less than 2:00. They didn't try to have a match, and that was for the best. Highlight was Boogey Man mounting Jillian Hall and trying to spit about 6 in her mouth that she held wide open. He missed that spot as well. Mama Benjamin is hitting on Vince again. Benjamin got a good number. Mercury & Nitro got decent numbers. Melina was hitting on Vince as well. All women love him, you know. Not only that, but Torrie Wilson's dog has a tattoo that says Vince on her coochie. You think I'm making any of this up? All the heels are telling Vince they'll eliminate Shawn for him. Ok, so JBL, a guy that totally revamped his character into a highly entertaining heel who held the WWE title for a year....gets squashed by the circus freak. Really, I'd LOVE to hear the apologists' defense there. And apparently the Rumble match is now, so I guess the winner will use his title shot tonight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Spaceman Spiff Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 So.......Helms on SD? I'll take that in a heartbeat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crucifixio Jones Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 This is the first time in years that I haven't watched the Royal Rumble live and not given a crap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sek69 Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Mickie James vs. Ashley is up next. They gave them more time than Ric Flair on the last Raw PPV. It was at least passable for 5:00, then it really fell apart and was as bad as you can imagine. James won with a botched power bomb off the ropes and tried to grope Trish, who didn't want to count the pin. Crowd turned on them, and Lawler tried to cover it by saying the crowd is unhappy with Ashley's actions. Victoria is wearing a fishnet shorts from behind. Candice supposedly showed Vince her boob. Big Show got a decent number. Rey and Big Show just shook hands and acted like best of friends. Show said he wished Rey best of luck. Did somebody have amnesia. They talked about how Eddie is going to help Rey choose a good number. It was a bad number and instead Eddie is playing a joke on him. We should have 175 more Eddie mentions before this report is out. And the Boogey Man is next. He beat JBL with a pump handle slam in less than 2:00. They didn't try to have a match, and that was for the best. Highlight was Boogey Man mounting Jillian Hall and trying to spit about 6 in her mouth that she held wide open. He missed that spot as well. Mama Benjamin is hitting on Vince again. Benjamin got a good number. Mercury & Nitro got decent numbers. Melina was hitting on Vince as well. All women love him, you know. Not only that, but Torrie Wilson's dog has a tattoo that says Vince on her coochie. You think I'm making any of this up? All the heels are telling Vince they'll eliminate Shawn for him. Ok, so JBL, a guy that totally revamped his character into a highly entertaining heel who held the WWE title for a year....gets squashed by the circus freak. Really, I'd LOVE to hear the apologists' defense there. And apparently the Rumble match is now, so I guess the winner will use his title shot tonight. Which apologists? People who like JBL? Or the Boogeyman? I don't get who you're mad at there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KingPK Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 People who think putting the latest piece of WrestleCrap over a former WWE champion is a good idea is who I'd like to hear from. I haven't been following WWE much lately, but this seems incredibly dumb to me. Lots of quick eliminations this year, it sounds like. What, are the title matches getting 25 minutes each or something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crucifixio Jones Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 HHH is starting. 90 second entrances they just announced. Rey is out. He's coming out in a Low Rider. So now we already know the story of two guys going coast to coast. We'll check in periodically when the various surprises happen, or not. We're 22:00 in. No surprises. Flair and Booker were only in for seconds. They're doing some time shaving. Lashley got some shine before Kane & Show dumped him. HHH dumped Kane & Show together, and Flair, and maybe a few others as well. Benoit is in with Rey, HHH, Carlito and Mercury. First surprise was Tatanka. Zero reaction at first, then a Seminole chant, and then they forgot he was in. We're 32:00. Ring is pretty full right now. Eugene was surprise No. 2. He's still in. Animal is winning the Ashley award.HHH eliminates Kane & Show??? Eugene is back? If Rey and HHH go the distance, you really think Rey's gonna eliminate Hunter? LOL @ Meltz saying Lashley got "some shine." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strummer Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Rey wins the Rumble but it means nothing as he will not get the title match at Mania Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strummer Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Meltzer: Edge vs. Cena is up next. Welcome to Stasiakville. Hope you enjoyed your 3 weeks with the title Edge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strummer Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Cena regains the title Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crucifixio Jones Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 And Rey did eliminate Hunter. In other news, Satan just put on his North Face jacket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sek69 Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Edge's title run is offically the most pointless ever. Did someone just have a panic attack when they decided to have Cena drop the belt or what? All they've established is that Edge can't win straight up against Cena and the fans still don't want to see him as champ. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KingPK Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 So it'll be Taker/Angle at NWO for the title. So 1) Who is the face there and 2) If it is Angle/Orton for Mania, how will Orton get Rey to put his title match on the line? I don't think they have that much of a history unless Orton goes the cheap route and bashes Eddie to piss Rey off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sek69 Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 All Randy has to do is point out that the fans aren't really cheering for Rey, they're cheering for Eddie. There's potential there, but Randy doesn't have the charisma to pull off the needed promos. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strummer Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 According to Meltzer and Keller Mania looks like this: Cena v HHH Angle v Orton Shawn Michaels v Vince McMahon Mick Foley v Edge (Keller) Undertaker v Mark Henry I'll say they will probably have Flair v Benjamin and Carlito v RVD. I have no idea about anything else. I'm trying to think who Rey can work and the only person coming to mind is JBL but they already feuded in the fall. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mike Campbell Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Just got back from Hooters with my buddies. The Rumble was the best match of the night by a long shot. There was this HUGE HBK fan, who was going nuts when he came out. So just for kicks, I jumped up yelling "YES!" when he got eliminated, and the guy threw his hat down and walked away, I thought he was gonna cry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goodhelmet Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 I'm trying to think who Rey can work and the only person coming to mind is JBL but they already feuded in the fall. Benoit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sek69 Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Good thing WCW's still not around or Benoit-Rey would be an Eddie-on-a-pole match. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bruiser Chong Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 This had to be one of the most hilariously bad WWE shows I've ever seen. That's no hyperbole, either. There were some serious WCW vibes tonight. Blowing Taker's special effects cue BOTH times was absolutely priceless and made him look like a rube. Goldust's awkward elimination ranks right up there with Jim Neidhart's in the battle royal at WM 2. This was my first look at the Boogeyman. My god. I felt so out of the loop not knowing who any of the divas were. Plus I didn't know Boogeyman was black. I was picturing Mordechi for some reason. Not sure if the crowd was just bad, but I've never heard such silence for as many matches as I did tonight. It's obvious why the Angle/Henry match went on last, but what a terrible "main event." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goodhelmet Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 I don't understand why they didn't just have the Rumble on last... or am I missing something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bruiser Chong Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Taker's lame lightning (which came down many awkward seconds after he threw his arms down) struck the ring and made it collapse. So you can thank Taker for getting Mark Henry on PPV after 10:30 for the first time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coffey Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 I took offense to when Loss said I like everything WWE does a month or so back because I knew it wasn't true. I'm just not as negative as a lot of other wrestling fans. I'll say this about the Rumble: My friend Eric paid for it. He even called off from work so my friends and I could all watch it over at his apartment. We ordered a pizza and made a day out of it. My friend Eric wasted thirty-five dollars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest NYU Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 As Bruiser said, hyperbole aside, this certainly has to be one of the worst Royal Rumble Pay-Per-Views aside. The card looked ugly on paper, but there have been shows that have managed to overcome that and put out something good. This wasn't one of the shows. Admittedly, I didn't order the Pay-Per-View, but the booking was downright horrific. Edge had some serious momentum going as Champion. Ratings were rising, he was getting a very good reaction. Meanwhile, Cena is still struggling to get the fans on his side and, although he was doing a decent job of it the past few weeks, the boos are still there. So what do they do? Have a panic attack and hand the title off to Cena. Edge's credibility is shot here, folks. The way they booked him tonight, he absolutely had no business holding the WWE Title at all. He won it in the cheapest fashion possible by beating Cena after the Elimination Chamber and, as we saw tonight, he just can't beat Cena in a clear match. He looks like a scrub now, and that stigma is going to stick. Angle/Henry was put in the closing slot of the Rumble for what reason? To watch the Undertaker make his dramatic return? Unfortunately, we just saw a PPV close out with Taker making this OMG special return two months ago. They used one of the biggest Pay-Per-Views of the year to set up a second-string PPV next month. I can't complain about the booking of the Rumble, but the heavy rumor is that Rey Misterio isn't going to be in a Main Event slot at all at WrestleMania. So the entire thing was pointless. Well, no. Not completely pointless. We got to watch Rey Misterio shred his dignity with all these constant Eddie Guerrero tributes and, as we'll see, he'll turn out to fail in his effort to memorialize his friend. That's wonderful. Next. Oh, and the Boogeyman squashed JBL. This doesn't really anger me, but it's ridiculous they felt the need to take someone that held the title for ten months, someone that is reliably over enough to slip in a title match here or there, someone who still has tremendous upside to offer....and squash him in a match against someone I guarantee we will not see around next January. I'm not saying they couldn't have the Boogeyman win here -- although I personally don't agree with him winning -- but they just made JBL look like an utter joke which is really going to chop away at his credibility. Yeesh, this card was a mess. And with WrestleMania 22 on the horizon, this ain't over yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Thread Killer Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 I'm confused...if Rey won the Rumble, why wouldn't he get a Title Shot at WM? Isn't that the rule still? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest NYU Posted January 30, 2006 Report Share Posted January 30, 2006 Meltzer: "The person winning the Rumble tonight will not be getting a Main Event match at WrestleMania" Rey won. Why they would do this, I have no idea. And of course, there is a chance Meltzer is wrong. But there had to have been a reason they shoved the Rumble in the midcard this year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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