WCW's Highway to Hell

[cm funk]

Shitty vignette of the week : Tony hears a menacing voice calling him, then we see a window with some storm outside. (Nitro) WCW had signed Dustin Rhodes away from WWF (why did he leave anyway ? I don't remember the circumstances of him leaving, Goldust was still pretty over I think) and they had a terrible idea for him...

'99 was when Dustin and Terri were going through an ugly breakup/divorce. I get the sense he just wanted a change of scenery. WCW must have overpaid to get him too because he was one of the guaranteed contracts that WWF didn't want to pick up, and he didn't come back until after he took a buyout from AOL/Time Warner.

 

Also the Goldust character was fairly played out by that point. They'd changed it/dropped it/gone back to it multiple times already in an attempt to keep it fresh. The last was when Dustin was in the crowd with signs as an "THE END IS NIGH" type crazy religious person.....that just led to Goldust coming back again.

[Death From Above]

I seem to recall in that long ago megathread of Meltzer quotes about the death of WCW that Dustin got $750K a year, and they called him in to some Nitro then sent him straight back home because creative had nothing for him to do. That sums up his time there, but probably also why he went.

[artDDP]

WCW came here to Sacramento in February 2000 for a "Nitro" telecast. That night was headlined by Hulk Hogan and Lex Luger in a cage match. I remember the section I was in screaming for Hulk to blade. Anyway, I was hanging out with a few guys in the parking lot afterward. There was one ribbon of security tape separating us from the wrestlers loading their cars and heading out. Arn Anderson helped load Ric Flair's bags into his limo and then Flair left without him. Arn took off in what I think was a rental car. I really thought Flair was a dick and that was when his image began to fade in my eyes.

 

Anyway, I also remember Dustin Rhodes loading his car and some guys were really laying into him, taunting him about his divorce, daughter, dad, the Goldust character, among other things I'm sure I'm forgetting. Dustin had a look on his face like he was ready to either cry or snap and beat them all up. I remember being seventeen and this probably being the first time in my life I told a group of guys to knock it the fuck off.

[Guest Nell Santucci]

Anyway, I also remember Dustin Rhodes loading his car and some guys were really laying into him, taunting him about his divorce, daughter, dad, the Goldust character, among other things I'm sure I'm forgetting. Dustin had a look on his face like he was ready to either cry or snap and beat them all up. I remember being seventeen and this probably being the first time in my life I told a group of guys to knock it the fuck off.

Yeah, that was in the early stages where Internet started becoming widespread, so a lot of goofy ECW marks read from rumor sites all day, got real names, and some dirt (most of which was probably bullshit). That led to a lot of fans feeling empowered by that knowledge and superior to other more casual or mark fans, and taunting wrestlers was one of their games. Fucked up, I must say. Dustin Rhodes never struck me as a bad guy, though he obviously has a lot of issues from having read his book. I'd like to think nowadays that fans are a lot less rabid and more respectful towards the boys since fans who have inside scoops don't feel like they're in some elite club as a result.

[ButchReedMark]

I was talking to him for 8 hours the other Sunday and he seemed cool enough. Made light of some of those issues in fact. Maybe it's because he's in his 40s now, I dunno.

[flyonthewall2983]

Dustin's a bit of a sad case, although not entirely because he seems to be in a pretty good position now (he still works for WWE, right?). If WCW had stuck to raising the level of the talent they already had instead of giving all those opportunities to Hogan and the older guys, I'm positive Dustin could have been a top guy in the company. Or at least he could have risen above the stigma of being a legend's son.

[ButchReedMark]

He loved the whole Seven thing, which really knocked me for six. Also really isn't a fan of pretty much anyone in the WWE not called Regal (who he loves, and with their chemistry I can't blame him), Cody, Sandow, Cena or people he used to work with.

 

But on WCW's death throes, when I was 15 in 2000 I thought Russo's booking was the coolest shit ever.

 

"Wow, there's something happening, wow there's a women in not much, SHIT A RUN IN! There's another woman! Fuck, a run in! INSIDER REFERENCE!"

 

If everyone watching wrestling was a teenager with a stiffy and small attention span Russo would be the greatest booker of all time.

[El-P]

WEEK 42 (October 18 to 23, 1999) : The Russo / Ferrara era begins. WCW is officially dead.

 

Match of the week : Juventud Guerrera & Silver King vs Kaz Hayashi & Blitzkrieg (Thunder). The show was obviously taped before teh two retards began to book. Nice little cruiser match with some time given so we get some actual face in peril work from Juvy. Always fun to see Silver King get some TV time in a match that actually isn't a squash.

 

Honorable mention of the week : Jamie Howard vs Kid Romeo (Saturday Night). Yeah, that's Jamie Noble's first WCW TV match I believe, and he already shows quite a lot of potential, not only doing fine cruiser spots, but also playing heel and pacinh the match pretty well. I have no recollection about that Kid Romeo guy, but he seems on the right side of the indieriffic line of young talent coming up at this time.

 

So, this was all about good little cruiserweight matches.

 

Ok, who am I kidding.

 

Explicite WWF references of the week : check. Russo & Ferrara actually namedropped as the former WWF creative team on the air. Later Jarrett talked about him being on a PPV the previous day (Nitro).

 

Evening gown match of the week : check. Mona vs Madusa (Nitro). Since the story is that Madusa doesn't want to have this match, they actually work a good little match with some of the best work of the night (which says a lot). Madusa actually bashes Mona's back with a chair, but Mona still wins.

 

1 minute long title match of the week : check. Disco Inferno vs Vampiro (Nitro). In a cruiserweight title match of course. Because like Disco as a cruiserweight isn't pushing it far enough, we need to have Vamp competing for this belt. He does the clean job anyway. Poor guy.

 

Throwaway title change of the week : check. Rey Mysterio Jr. & Konnan win the tag title belts (Nitro). Total afterthought of a match, we get Eddie, Kidman & Torrie distracting at the booth and at ringside. So now we can get a three-way match at the PPV, because 3-ways are always great, aren't they ? Speaking of which...

 

3-way match of the week : check. Eddie Guerrero vs Perry Saturn vs Chavo Guerrero Jr. (Nitro). Totally heatless stuff, and pretty damn bad to boot. Got no heat whatsoever and a weak ECW chant (you're in Philly) after the requisite dangerous spot in which Chavo nearly broke his neck.

 

Shooty-shooty promo of the week : check. Buff Bagwell talking about having the stroke with the guys in the back and being the chosen one.

 

Shooty-shooty angle of the week : check. Buff Bagwell inexplicably "doing the job" for La Parka, as a "shoot".

 

Awful debut of the week : check. Jeff Jarrett crashing a guitar on Bagwell's head and talking about stroke and being someone's boy. And graping his crotch too. Later in the evening, we'd see Elizabeth (who's a heel) layed down on the floor backstage next to a broken guitar.

 

There's also Kimberly Page hitting on David, only to end up with Ric in her hotel room. Meanwhile, the Filthy Animals (supposed to be faces) beat down David Flair leading to Ric challenging them and being beaten down too. And the first appearance of Stacy Keibler as a contestant for the Nitro Girls search. And Hall & Nash laughing at the face of Goldie at ringside. And Bret Hart losing a match to Sting because of Luger. Yeah. This is going to get really ugly really quick. I really thought hard about throwing the reminder of WCW TV in my trash can after watching that very first Nitro. It's gonna be hard people, there was zero good wrestling match on Nitro already. Sting vs Bret Hard was pretty bad and boring and that was the only one that got any time. Really, Mona vs Madusa was the most enjoyable work of the show. Gasp.

[Bix]

Ahem, it wasn't just an evening gown match.

 

It was a New York Evening Gown Match. Get it? New York! In wrestling!

[tomk]

WEEK 42 (October 18 to 23, 1999) : The Russo / Ferrara era begins. WCW is officially dead.

 

Honorable mention of the week : Jamie Howard vs Kid Romeo (Saturday Night). Yeah, that's Jamie Noble's first WCW TV match I believe, and he already shows quite a lot of potential, not only doing fine cruiser spots, but also playing heel and pacinh the match pretty well. I have no recollection about that Kid Romeo guy, but he seems on the right side of the indieriffic line of young talent coming up at this time.

 

So, this was all about good little cruiserweight matches.

Kid Romeo had a WCWSN series with Allan Funk and I want to say a SN match with Tommy Rogers before he started working rest of the Powerplanters (Noble, Elix Skipper, Mike Sanders, Reno, etc). He ended up going to NJ ( I want to say worked with Usuda, Shibetta and Dr Wagner and teamed with Tanahashi) and then came back to WCW when they ran the cruiserweight tag tourney.

[Tim Cooke]

April 2000 he wrestled Tommy Rogers on one of the last Saturday Night's before it became a clip show/cancelled. WCW aired generic video pieces for him leading up to his debut in the cruiser weight tag tourney. Since WCW never did stuff like that, at least in the prior year or so, it felt a little special and he was more over than you would expect a new cruiser weight to be.

[El-P]

PPV 10 : Halloween Havoc 1999

 

Match of the night : DDP vs Ric Flair. This is a strap match, because Flair spanked Kimberly when he got her in the hotel room. Okay. The gimmick helps Ric quite a bit since the only thing he has to do is brawl, chop, take strap chops and deliver some, and bleed. So it's end up being the best Flair match in ages, well, probably since his last match against DDP, who's holding it together. They don't do the four corner touch gimmick though, it's just a brawl with a strap. Ends up witha pretty terrific Diamond Cutter, then DDP proceeds to beat the shit out of Flair. David shows up with a crowbar, gets suckered by Kim who knees him in the balls/gut, which is great, so that DDP can get the crowbar and bust Flair's nuts with it. Pretty brutal stuff, akin to the infamous Lawler cane shot to Dreamer in ECW. David gets Diamond Cut too, as was Charles Robinson. Great post match, DDP and Kim rules. Sadly it goes overkill as they do a stretcher job with Flair like he had also a neck injury, only to be attacked by the Filthy Animals (who were themselves attacked by Flair earlier on). They actually kidnap Flair in the ambulance.

 

Most solid match of the night : Bret Hart vs Lex Luger. The story is that Bret has got his right ankle badly injured by Luger on Monday with a bat shot, so Bret sells it in a quite subtle way. He still beats the shit out of Luger for most of the match until Luger turns things around and makes Bret submit. Not the prettiest nor flashiest match, but all made sense and Bret's selling was excellent. Liz was sporting a ridiculously sexy dress.

 

Bloodbath of the night : Sid Vicious vs Goldberg. Really, it's all about the blood and Sid hitting a 10 on the Muta scale gusher, because there's nothing else to it. It's quite a fun spectacle when Sid isn't on offense, and it works for what it is. As awful as the whole build had been for this, the match it much better than it had the right to, but it's not much really when you actually look at what they do or accomplish. Sid's post match stuff is total brave babyface routine.

 

Bonus match of the night : Goldberg vs Sting. Sting challenged anyone earlier in the show after the HOgan debacle (more on that later), so Goldberg shows up. Short intense sprint that's way better than their bad PPV match earlier in the year. Goldie wins the WCW title back. Good for him, he should be on top, but this is hotshotting booking at its worst.

 

Shooty-shooty angle of the night 1 : Sting vs Hulk Hogan. Hogan shows up in street clothes and lays down for Sting. Yawn. I have no idea what this was supposed to mean.

 

Shooty-shooty angle of the night 2 : Buff Bagwell calls out Jeff Jarrett after referring to the "writers from New York coming down to save WCW". Luger also shows up to attack Jarrett (because of the guitar found next to Liz) but misses Jarrett and hits Bagwell with the guitar instead. Super yawn.

 

Sexist & shooty-shooty promo of the night : Madusa in a hot bikini promoting WCW Cologne. She's not happy with doing sexist stuff so she pours the Cologne on Heenan. Ah ah ah. See, more comments bout "writers in the back" and meta-shoot promo about not bieng happy about doing what you're told. Stupid.

 

Swerve of the night : Dean Malenko turning on Chris Benoit. God, that Benoit vs Rick Steiner match was awful. Steiner is worthless at this point. And we get a swerve at the end, which makes no sense whatsoever.

 

Surprise finish of the night : Brad Armstrong gets the pin on Berlyn. Okay, kill Berlyn off already. Sure, it's a fluke pin of sorts, but still, Berlyn has looked like shit against Duggan at the last PPV and now loses against a perenial JTTS. He's dead. But it's a surprise finish, it'll make people intrigued. I guess.

 

Disco Inferno vs Las Leroux was bad, Leroux is just an athetic guy whose spotty as hell and sloppy to boot. The 6 man tag team match between Harlem Heat, First Family and Filthy Animals (Kidman & Konnan, Rey being injured) ends with a confusing finish with the Heat getting the pin backstage before Kidman gets the pin in the ring. Useless. Eddie ve Saturn was not good at all and ended up with Flair simply walking into the ring to attack Eddie with a crowbar. The Animals are heels now. 3 shoot angle/promos, 1 swerve, 4 title changes, Flair molesting two women. Great job. The last half of the PPV saved it thanks to Bret, DDP, Flair and Goldie and a lot of blood basically.

[Death From Above]

Hooray! It's back!

 

Also this seems the time to drop one of my favourite Metlzer-isms ever, from that old glorious "Meltzer WCW quotes megathread" thing:

"Madusa came out in a bikini. The implants looked ridiculous but this is a business of excess. She came out with Nitro cologne. It was the weirdest thing as Heenan was getting over just how horrible smelling the cologne is. It is a WCW product and they were pushing how bad it smelled. Madusa started screaming it was bullshit and threw the cologne on Heenan, who reacted like it smelled like cow manure. In fact, they actually used the word manure to describe the smell of the cologne. This was weird to say the least" - The Wrestling Observer Newsletter: November 1, 1999. "

[Ditch]

Doing that sort of thing *on a PPV*, with zero follow-through after, is precisely the sort of baffling choice only Russo could make.

[El-P]

WEEK 43 (October 25 to 30, 1999)

 

This is it. The first Nitro Russo & Ferrara wrote obviously wasn't them yet. They had to use the material they got from the former bookers one week before the PPV, so they couldn't really go full speed. This week's Nitro was the real true to the fact first Russo Nitro, and in the matter of three hours, he made the worst of Kevin Nash look like Bill Watts at his best. I forgot how *unwatchable* that shit was. Seriously, it's beyond human comprehension.

 

Idiotic bracket of the week : WCW World Title tournament (Nitro). Yeah, because Goldie really didn't win the WCW title on PPV as it wasn't an official title match. But Sting still gets stripped of the title. So we get a giant tournament to crown a brand new champion. With brackets. Cool. And then we have on this first batch of first round matches : a match that could/should headline a major PPV (Bret Hart vs Goldberg), a partner vs partner (Konna vs Kidman), a hardcore match and a woman vs a mystery opponent (Madusa vs Meng). Okay. Shoot me.

 

Angle of the week : DDP gets busted by David Flair with a crowbar (Nitro). DDP with Kim (who looks stunning) makes fun of Ric Flair who he sent to the hospital at the PPV. He's supposed to face David in a tournament match (yeah, David Flair is in the WCW title tournament match, then again so are Lash Leroux, Norman Smiley and a woman...). David shows up dressed in his Flair robe, but he's got a crowbar hidden in his back and he jumps DDP with it and beats him up. Kim jumps in front of DDP to protect him. David looks nuts. Decent stuff.

 

Fun spot of the week : Lex Luger let Liz fall on her ass to win his match (Nitro). The way Luger acted was pretty funny. The circumstances don't matter, Liz fell on the floor while she was afraid of Jarrett who showed up 10 seconds into the match between Luger & Rick Steiner. Jarrett busted Steiner accidentally and while the referree was counting both of them out, Luger was helping Liz to get up when he just let her fall down to jump back into the ring. Luger was pretty goofy and funny doing it.

 

Abuse of woman angle of the week : The Revolution abducts Torrie Wilson (Nitro). At one point Saturn says to the Animals "Don't do anything or you will never see Torrie again". Really ? Are we supposed they will kill Torrie Wilson ? Anyway, this is absolutely stupid and leads to nothing but more idiotic stuff. Also it should be noted that it's the comeback of Asya, who wasn't missed by any. And it's a feud no one knows who to cheer for since both these factions are essentially heels. Yes, Vince Russo actually turned Rey Mysterio into a heel from nowhere and for no reason.

 

Awful debut of the week : The Harris Brothers (Nitro). Dressed in suits, representing the "writers in the back". Not yet named Patrick & Gerald, but shit, this is awful already.

 

Titale change of the week : The Filthy Animals get the tag belts back from Harlem Heat (Nitro). Man, Harlem Heat is so damn tepid. Kill it already.

 

Gimmick match of the week : Chris Benoit vs Dean Malenko (Nitro). Last Man Standing. Worked in jeans, because it's a brawl I guess. Nothing to write home about really. Benoit had a better match with Sid on Thunder.

 

Random match of the week : Berlyn vs Jerry Flynn (Thunder). Berlyn speaks English. Because Russo doesn't want people to speak another language on TV. You're in 'merica, speak 'merican. Nice little match with some really good smooth stuff at the beginning. Flynn is sporting brand new flashy red pants.

 

Random tag match of the week : Silver King & El Dandy vs Steve & Scott Armstrong. (Saturday Night). Probably the best wrestling action I've seen this week, mostly thanks to the luchadors, as in all honesty the Armstrongs aren't that good, but solid enough to work well with these two. Scott does the worst hot tag ever though.

 

Embarrassing moment of the week : The Outsiders "wrestle" against strippers (Nitro). I have no words.

 

I'm just not gonna go into all the details of this incredibly stupid and shitty product. There's no good wrestling on TV anymore. Everybody talks now, because that's the name of the game. Lots of tits & ass all over the place. Lots of WWF references thrown around. Curt Hennig must not have his shoulders pinned or he'll be forced into retirement. Buff Bagwell is deep into shooty-shooty stuff. Jarrett is saying this whole tournament is a big "work" and that he's the chosen one. You know, I really thought hard after this Nitro, it's so unbearable that I thought I would just quit doing this. Since there's way too much shit to talk about, and this would burn out my brain cells anyway, I have decided I would use the Vince Russo Tally. It's not gonna be very precise, but bear with me anyway, I'm still gonna use it to just prevent myself from having to talk about *every* retarded stuff this guy put on TV. So, I got back to his first official show and there it is thus far :

 

The Vince Russo Tally :

 

Title changes : 5

 

Swerves : 1

 

Special gimmick matches on free TV : 3

 

WWF references : 5

 

Woman abuse/mysoginistic bullshit : 7

 

Shooty-shooty comments/angles : 7

[Ditch]

Embarrassing moment of the week : The Outsiders "wrestle" against strippers (Nitro). I have no words.

Because it was so bizarre in a car wreck way, this segment got the highest rating of the show by a full point. Russo used that to justify everything else going forward, ie. traditional/logical booking and wrestling matches don't get the same ratings as garbage so let's do garbage.

 

Argh.

[El-P]

WEEK 44 (Novembre 1 to 6, 1999)

 

Shooty-shooty & WWF wink-wink promo of the week : Kevin Nash impersonates Vince McMahon (Nitro). Yes, it's official, now they are promoting New York's product. It's not even slightly funny. Very smark references to "being the toughest SOB yet still working the main event against Jeff Jarrett" and other shit like that. I wonder how Russo wasn't just fired after putting that kind of shit on TV, he's not just godawful and counterproductive at this point, he's actively reminding that the hot product is on the other channel.

 

Gimmick match of the week : Chris Benoit vs Dean Malenko in a cage (Nitro). This is a tournament match. WOrked like the ending stretch of a 15 minute match, complete with Benoit doing the head-drop from teh top of the cage. In a random 5 minutes TV match leading to a gigantic clusterfuck with the Revolution attacking Benoit then the Filthy Animals attacking the Revolution then David Flair attacking the Filthy Animals.

 

On-the-pole match of the week : Eddie Guerrero vs Perry Saturn (Nitro). To get a key. To free Tori Wilson, who's in a cage at ringside. The match sucks. Eddie slips when he tries to climb up the pole while Torrie has to maintain Saturn strangled up against the cage for ages.

 

Funny character of the week : Lex Luger comploting to eliminate his opponnents in the tournament (Nitro). Luger is actually pretty funny in that role, turning Meng against Jarrett then luring Meng with Liz who sprays some shit in his eyes. Asking Sting to challenge the Animals with him to get the tag belts, only to fake a knee injury and let Sting get beat up by the Animals (who act like heels or babyfaces depending on whom they are against). Doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but Luger is kinda amusing.

 

Xenophobic promo of the week : La Parka with fake and ridiculous subtitles (Thunder). This is horrendous. Stuff about Skeletor. And then he jobs hard to Bagwell.

 

Catfight of the week : AC Jazz hits Spike during a dance routine. (Nitro) Yeah, more women in skimpy outfits, because we need more T & A than we already have with Torrie Wilson, Kimberly, Asya dressed as a transvestite hooker, the Cat coming to the ring with hoes (I guess) and Madusa as a sexed-up MILF.

 

Cool match of the week : Curt Hennig vs Disco Inferno, with Larry the Axe at ringside (Nitro). Larry gets a big chant, and pops Disco at one time. It could have developped into a good match, but of course after two minutes a scrawny looking italian guy shwos up and Disco leaves with him. You know where this is going...

 

Match of the week : Villano IV & V vs Steven Regal & Dave Taylor (Saturday Night). Yep, having a 5 minutes halfway competitive match between JTTS is enough to get the match of the week stamp of approval at this point. This is how sad things have become.

 

Sex spot of the week : Madusa vamps Evan Karagias around (Nitro). During their tournament match. Yeah. So she wins and fondles the young boys-band look-alike.

 

You also get the debut of the Misfits as Vampiro's buddies, Norman Smiley turned into a complete comedy gimmick in hardcore matches, which I hate, the first Powers That Be vignette backstage with Duggan and Russo's awful delivery, tons of shitty 2 minutes matches and more WWF references. The most interesting stuff this week was actually a sit down interview with Scott Steiner who just had a back surgery. Out of character, serious, old-school style. Thunder has pretty much been forgotten at this point too. Oh, and Kimberly left the Nitro Girls, leading to their demise, and she ran over David Flair. The production work doing crash TV is pretty awful, with terrible editing cuts from one scene to another. The Revolution vs Filthy Animals feud is awful, Saturn & Eddie can't have a good match together to save their life it seems, time or no time, and the heel/face structuring is totally messed up with the Animals. I guess they are some sort of tweeners, which just doesn't work. Berlyn is still working pretty hard and gets good heat despite not going anywhere. Jeff Jarrett debuted in a 3 minutes match against Booker T and looked very smooth, but the stench of Russo is all over him, and he's already overexposed on the mic.

 

Vince Russo Tally

 

Title changes : 5

 

Swerves : 1

 

Special gimmick matches on free TV : 4

 

On-a-pole matches : 1

 

WWF references : 9

 

Woman abuse/mysoginistic bullshit : 9

 

Shooty-shooty comments/angles : 11

[Bix]

I can't believe you didn't mention Nash pretending the fans were chanting "asshole" at him in a failed attempt to incite said chants. That's my favorite part of that disaster.

 

"What? Stop chanting that! I'm not one of those! You people are the ones who are those things!"

[El-P]

WEEK 45 (November 8 to 13, 1999)

 

Shooty-shooty & WWF wink-wink promo of the week : Dustin Rhodes shoots (Nitro). The whole Seven character was a total Undertaker rip-off, but damn his intro was really creepy and looked pretty cool actually. I'm not so sure about his in-ring look. It doesn't matter anyway since that was a Bischoff (or Sullivan I guess) idea, so this goes down the drain in a classic shoot interview in which Dustin runs down the Powers To Be, Goldust (which "almost ruined his career"... uh... really ?) and WCW for kicking out his father after 20 years of good and loyal services. Total WWF referential interview, complete with Dustin adapting his Goldust catchphrase. As it's often the case with Dustin, he's turning complete dogshit material into something decent because he can be that solid on the stick, and it's the case here. The line about "dressing up like Uncle Fester to play trick or treats all year long" was delivered in a really funny way. Him coming back as plain Dustin Rhodes, with all his WCW history, was probably the best thing for him anyway.

 

Complete overkill special gimmicks match of the week : Texas tornado ladder match with a special referee (Nitro). How can you not laugh at the absurdity of this ? This is Sid vs Bret Hart vs Goldberg vs Scott Hall for the US title, with Kevin Nash as the referee (the same Kevin Nash that was imitating the Grand Wizard earlier in the show). Ends up with a total screwjob too, with Bret winning the belt but Nash still giving it to his pal Scott Hall.

 

Best character of the week : Lex Luger the greatest chickenshit ever (Nitro-Thunder) Luger is the most entertaining guy in the company. His chickenshit act is excellent. First we get an angle with Sting, who asks Luger to come down and explain his actions from the previous week. Liz shows up to "apologize" to Sting, but he isn't happy with it and basically intimidates her until Lex comes down to the ring. Lex cuts a very solid, apologetic promo, although it's obvious he's full of shit. Lex is pretty great here, being serious and all, pretty convincive yet acting annoyed at the crowd that sees through his shit. It fails miserably as Sting for once shows some brain and threatens him to not screw around with him. Later on Luger would run down the ring during an atrocious Sting vs Goldie match (which consisted in a prolonged sleeperhold from the get go) and "accidentaly" maced Sting. Bad execution here. The other good stuff was him faking a knee injury so he doesn't get to face Sid later in the show. He does the old-school wheelchair routine, but Sting comes down the ramp, chases Liz off and throws Luger into the ring. The funny thing is that despite being in the ring with freaking Sid, Luger *still* milks his fake injury for all its worth, like Sid was gonna show any mercy. Liz comes back to protect Luger, and he blatantly uses her as a shield. Great chickenshit stuff. Then it ends in a schmozz with Goldie spearing Sid, but the Luger hilarity doesn't end here as he offers his hand to Goldie !! Goldie helps him back up but immediately spears him. On Thunder Luger does another chickenshit promo pretending to be too injured to wrestler Kaz Hayashi. That is until Kaz calls him an actual "Chickenshit !". Luger waits for the right moment and destroys Hayashi, not looking injured at all. The killer is Liz whispering something to Luger's ears as he's celebrating, and Luger goes back to sell his "injury". I loved all that stuff.

 

Most absurd finish ever of the week : A hardcore match taking place backstage ending up in a.... COUNT OUT !! (Nitro). Bam Bam vs Knobbs doing their usual hardcore stuff from the ring to the backstage area. Norman Smiley who's guest announcing actually follows them around, which is funny enough. When all of a sudden Kimberly shows up all panicky, as she's been stalked all night long by a crazed David Flair, and begs for Bam Bam's help. Nice continuity for once, as Bam Bam was a close friend of DDP in the Triad. Anyway, Bam Bam basically leaves the fight scene and the referee COUNTS HIM OUT !! WTF ????? My jaw dropped !

 

Best potential match of the week : Jeff Jarrett vs Curt Hennig (Nitro). The few minutes they were given shows that these two could have a very solid match in the right circumstances. Ends up with a nice touch when after Creative Control interfered to save Jarrett's ass, they put Hennig through the announcer's table and try to shoved him back into the ring, but Hennig hang on to the mats and barricades to get counted out and prevent an inevitable pinfall (remember, he has to leave WCW if he gets pinned). Well of course you can argue the referee should just have DQed Jarrett when he saw CC mess around with Hennig, but for what it was, I thought it was good.

 

Match of the week : Jaime Howard vs Devon Storm (Saturday Night). These two work like it's 1996 and they want to get the cruiserweight division over. By that I mean, way too hard for this company and what it could offer them at this point. This is spotty but with lot of good action and impressive athletic stuff and counters. A proto X-division match of sorts, I guess.

 

Awkward match of the week : Chris Benoit vs Madusa (Nitro). Looking that stuff *now* is pretty awkward for obvious reasons, although Benoit never really hits Madusa for most of the short match they have together, only one chop (hey, how much of a pussy does Sid look like now ?) which looked like the end of the match, and Benoit acted like he didn't want to hit her. Ends up with Jarrett interfering and making a reference to his WWF gimmick of women beater. DQ, Benoit wins.

 

Well, this week was better, at least there was some pretty fun stuff, and some decent in-ring action (I mean for late 1999 WCW) with Kidman & Konnan vs Barbarian & Jerry Flynn and also Curt Hennig vs Dean Malenko on Thunder, Bret Hart (limping less) vs Perry Saturn on Nitro and the Kimberly & David Flair angle which saw the involment of Bam Bam, ending up with David beating up Bigelow with his crowbar and Kim running scared shitless through the crowd (then David destroying her car while she was inside). Of course there was also a lot of shit, like the Disco Inferno owning money to the mafia angle developping, the infamous Nitro Girl feud, the debut of a tall black woman helping Booker T (not yet with the stupid entrance), the fucking Misfits as the new Vampiro stable, Evan Karagias & Madusa, La Parka being given a fake English voice, Duggan as a janitor, Chavo Guerrero as an Amway seller and stuff like that. Oh, and an atrocious mixed tag match between the Animals (who are bayfaces after all, I guess, now that Ric Flair is no longer around) & the Revolution. Perry Saturn looks like he's going a bit loony, so we already have the seeds for partners not going along in the Revolution *again*. That being said, they need Shane Douglas as a color man yesterday. Each time he's on the mic announcing during his partners' matches he's so above everyone else on the announcing team it's ridiculous. One thing about the Filthy Animals : with her high heels, Torrie is basically taller than anyone in the stable, which kinda looks odd...

 

Vince Russo Tally

 

Title changes : 6

 

Swerves : 1

 

Special gimmick matches on free TV : 6

 

On-a-pole matches : 1

 

WWF references : 13

 

Woman abuse/mysoginistic bullshit : 11

 

Shooty-shooty comments/angles : 13

[Gregor]

Best character of the week : Lex Luger the greatest chikenshit ever

I love Luger's character during this wretched period. There's an episode of Nitro or Thunder that he carries by being hilarious in a series of backstage skits - they were all about him impressing the Powers That Be by promising to wrestle Liz in a mud match. I think there was another episode in which he's booked against Sting or Sid and keeps trying to leave the arena to get out of the match, but something always happens to foil his plans, like when Silver King steals his taxi. He also corrects anyone who refers to him by his old name.

[cowboy hats]

Shooty-shooty & WWF wink-wink promo of the week : Kevin Nash impersonates Vince McMahon (Nitro). Yes, it's official, now they are promoting New York's product. It's not even slightly funny. Very smark references to "being the toughest SOB yet still working the main event against Jeff Jarrett" and other shit like that. I wonder how Russo wasn't just fired after putting that kind of shit on TV, he's not just godawful and counterproductive at this point, he's actively reminding that the hot product is on the other channel.

Video

[El-P]

WEEK 46 (November 15 to 20, 1999)

 

Match of the week : Goldberg vs Curt Hennig (Nitro). Hennig still tries to prevent from having to retire by not getting pinned, plus he can win a new contract if he beats Goldie, so he attacks him backstage during his long walk to the ring. They really beat the shit out of each other, and it's fun to see Hennig actually kicking some ass for once. Goldebg sells enough to make it seems like a brawl but not too much either to not look to vulnerable. Finally in the ring, Hennig does one slap to many which pisses off Goldie who puts him into a leg submission. Hennig taps out immediatly sensing bad things are coming up. He still saved his ass. Of course Goldberg still manages to spear and jackhammer him afterward. Good stuff.

 

Honorable mention of the week : Chris Benoit vs Buff Bagwell (Thunder). This might be Bagwell's best match post-injury, for sure. Nothing special, but Benoit keeps the pace up and sells well for Bagwell''s limited offense. Some shenanigans by Hennig at ringside (him and Bagwell must face at the PPV with the loser being forced into retirement, yeah right) before Benoit makes Bagwell taps. Man, Bagwell sure fell down the drain quickly after the infamous Piper feud. Benoit also had a solid match with Scott Hall.

 

Brawl of the week : Barbarian vs Jerry Flynn (Nitro). This is basically a boiler room match, because anything that was done in WWF must be done in WCW. Really stiff stuff, but they mostly use their fists and kicks, which makes it a hundred times better than the usual goofy hardcore stuff. Short and sweet, with Flynn surprisingly KOing Barbie.

 

Special gimmick match of the week : House of pain match : Konnan & Eddie Guerrero vs Perry Saturn & Dean Malenko (Nitro). God this feud is rotten. This is a cage match with a bunch of handcuffs to which you have to attach your opponent with. Match lasts about 2 minutes or so before the Animals get handcuffed, then the Revolution handcuff Rey to the top of the cage and destroy his right knee. Rey must get a surgery. This is really awful. Best part was Saturn's promo before the match singing "Jump!" and making Malenko jump around with him. House of Pain you see...

 

On the pole match + sleezy business of the week : Pinada on the pole match & Oklahoma (Nitro). So we get a racist cliché + Ed Ferrara making fun of JR which is amusing to some extent when he does the college sports bit and annoying Ross maneurisms but also pretty sleazy and totally counterproductive. Add to this that the pinata fell down about 30 seconds into the match, so the luchadors had no idea what to do with it and looked stupid. The only "positive" stuff about this whole embarrassing deal is Dr. Death throwing the luchadors around was a much better debut for him than anything he did in the WWF, for obvious reasons. Stiff, this is trash.

 

Grudge match of the week : Lex Luger vs Sting (Nitro) Luger keeps in being quite entertaining. He offered Sting some flowers and also some brownies (with laxative, leading to a not funny at all vignette of Duggan stealing them and being sick as a dog later), to no effect, Sting kicks his ass and works his fake knee injury until it becomes a real one. Luger trips the referree while he's in the scorpion deathlock (which is a nice little chickenshit spot) and Liz maces Sting. Luger would have won if not for Meng who gets his revenge from a few weeks back and kills Luger. Fun stuff.

 

Line of the week : "You're half the man I am. And I've got half the brain you do." Sid Vicious (Nitro). This is pretty legendary. To his credit, he stayed very serious while Nash & Hall were busting out in the ring, didn't blink and delivered the rest of his promo which was actually pretty decent since it was more of a serious babyface one. The line was one of the greatest fuck up you can think off though, especially since the whole thing about the Outsiders was saying Sid was an idiot. Since Russo is such a smart ass, they actually reshowed the fuck-up on Thunder in the video package for the PPV. What a bunch of...

 

So, the final four are Jarrett, Sting, Benoit & Bret Hart, which means we have three babyfaces (including two über babyface since it's the first PPV in Canada for WCW) and the Chosen One. Russo sure wanted Jarrett to work the main event. The Revolution vs Filthy Animals is simply horrible. Totally ruined by rushing through gimmick matches every week on TV and involving Torrie and Asya as in-ring workers. What a waste of talent. Dean & Saturn vs Eddie & Kidman could have some really good match if given the time, but this is not what it's about. Berlyn vs Vampiro is too bad for Berlyn, as the seeds for a Wall puch are planted. Vamp got a bunch of anchors with the Misfits, who mean absolutely shit. Bagwell vs Hennig is decent on paper. Disco vs Evan look like it will be overwhelmed by out of the ring stuff, as they *already* tease that Madusa is fucking up with Evan's mind after *one* week of being together. Luger vs Meng sounds fun, because Luger has been the most fun character on the roster recently.

 

Vince Russo Tally

 

Title changes : 6

 

Swerves : 1

 

Special gimmick matches on free TV : 8

 

On-a-pole matches : 2

 

WWF references : 17

 

Woman abuse/mysoginistic bullshit : 13

 

Shooty-shooty comments/angles : 16

[Matt D]

Weirdly, you made the good stuff sound pretty good.

[cowboy hats]

Grudge match of the week : Lex Luger vs Sting (Nitro) Luger keeps in being quite entertaining. He offered Sting some flowers and also some brownies (with laxative, leading to a not funny at all vignette of Duggan stealing them and being sick as a dog later)

[fishbaugh]

This was such a weird time for me watching Nitro as I had stopped watching wrestling entirely from like late-93 - late-96, but had a guy I worked with bring me back into watching after hearing about the Misterio lawn dart angle. After that, I watched every week with him up until September of 1999 when I moved away. So when the Russo era started, and I thought it was terrible, it took me a while to figure out if that was because it was actually terrible or because I wasn't watching with my homies any more. Even at 19 I thought this shit was terrible, but I stuck around until the final Nitro before swearing off wrestling for another 2+ years!