El-P

No. And I love Kanyon. Mid-card guy. Still underpushed for his talent though.

The lesser half of Doom.

Quite frankly, at this point, this has become a "name anyone you want" game anyway, so why not Ron Simmons.

Because Kane had been introduced after months of a major storyline involving the Undertaker and was a huge "7 feet" jacked up monster, with big time production effects, while La Parka had been a goofy luchador wearing a skeleton outfit and doing insane dives in six-men time filler lucha matches for one year by that point. At this rate, fucking Wrath had more chance of getting over, and he kinda did actually in late 98 before getting squashed by Nash, just because. Come on people, La Parka in WCW. Should he have been pushed a lot more into a player in the mid card ? Without a doubt. But a main event guy in that company during those years ? Not a chance. Rey on the other hand ? Without a doubt.

Cena is the best Hulk Hogan ever, basically (in the ring I mean).

I actually like Batista way more than I like Orton (not hard), and I remember thinking that HHH match at Mania was really good and one of HHH's best performance. But the whole presentation is stereotypical from the mid'00's WWE, which I really don't care for. Big Show has actively sucked thus far, so yeah, not a good deal for Batista I guess.

DDP. Raven. Jericho. Scott Steiner. Benoit. Eddie. Rey Jr. (yeah, he could and should).

Ok, this TV show has to be a giant troll. Episode 8 takes place at the Hammerstein Ballroom, with a bunch of ECW mutants. So you know they'll shit on a main event like Big Show vs Batista, rightfully so, as it's a terrible match. And even in a 8 minutes or so TV match, they are so bad that the only way they try to work a "good match" is, yeah, you guessed it, spamming nearfalls and kickouts. Well, spamming in a lumbering, very deliberate way. Batista reminds me why this era of WWE is so terrible on every aspect, the generic roided look with tribal tatoos on the trunks, the robotic style. Anyway, match ends on a DQ (in an ECW title match) and Sabu proceeds to do a bunch of chair spots on Show who then falls down through a table, so I guess that was their way on redeeming themselves. Anyway. Kurt Angle squashed the Brooklyn Brawler. Yeah, WWE hilarity here and not a waste of time at all. Kevin Thorne cuts a typical WWE promo, devoid of any character. This promotion is lifeless. And then there's this Tommy Dreamer & Sandman vs Mike Knox & Test match, which is pretty much useless too, the worst Nakamaki & Ohno vs Leatherface 1 & 2 match ever. The highlight is Sandman throwing a dropkick. We get Dreamer sexually assaulting Kelly. You know, even in ECW, I don't see the purpose of a babyface spanking a girl who really hasn't been portrayed as a heel at all and never did anything bad to begin with. That was pretty appaling to be honest. Then we get Heyman's security running in and Test throwing Dreamer in the barb wire board twice. The ECW originals are pictured as complete jobbers again. The only saving grace of this show was the debut of CM Punk against Justin Credible, in a pretty good short match. Punk got over big time in front of this audience of course, and Credible looked decent, busting out a cool Lance Storm leg roll up. But really, this show… Oh yeah, and Sabu talks too now, because those WWE dialogues are so good.

This. And I do enjoy Cena more than any other 00's WWE manufactured big match worker, Lesnar expected (but he's a special case). And really, there are some other issues like execution (sorry, but it does matter). To get back to that Owens match (which I liked quite a bit before the overlong finishing stretch), finisher kickouts spamming does not a great match (or work) make.

Watching the early PPV's, TNA had some pretty good wrestling content from the beginning. It's much much better than the last 1 1/2 year of WCW (then again, everything is), and also murders early WWECW which I happen to watch at the same time.

Kinda.

PPV 7 had quite a bit to enjoy again. Elix Skipper vs AJ Styles was much better than I thought it would, and it's no small part because of Skipper, who dumbed it down, settled the pace in slower mode and was quite good in working over AJ's neck after a brutal looking dragon suplex. I would have never guessed Skipper could work that kind of match. The ending saw an horrible looking bump which looked like a death botch, but AJ quickly finishd the match so it made sense. One of the best TNA match thus far, if not the best. The X division delivered again with Jerry Lynn vs Low-Ki, with AJ kissing way to much ass on the mic to not turn heel at the end, which he did. Low-Ki continues to look like the best guy in TNA, and Lynn is his impressive self in spots. We're building toward a three-way dance, which I could live without as it will get more awkward, but I guess I should get used to it in the X division. Good stuff. And really, that Jeff Jarrett vs Scott Hall brawl was pretty good. Hall kicked Jarrett's ass all over the building, including backstage, where Jarrett shoved Jerry Lynn away in the process, which played a role later (nice attention to detail here). Some funky use of the stretcher with good execution. The old ECW fan in me liked the run-ins cluster which worked in that Lynn had a reason to fuck with Jarrett, then it got just crazier with Don Harris (gulp) showing up as the security guy who then got beat up by the New Church… Anyway, it worked for me, much like the finish where for the first time ever, the Stroke actually looked efficient. Like the previous week, Ron Killings promo was very strong, him adressing that dancer was good stuff although it went a little far at the end (hum… sexual agression anyone ?). He was good confronting Steamboat too (although not adressing the fact Steamboat had won the NWA world title was stupid and illogical, but I guess it didn't fit the storyline, which is even more stupid since we're supposed to be in the NWA) and Ricky was himself a much better promo in the role than I thought he would. The other decent stuff included Slash vs Sonny Siaki and Apollo vs Malice (who really dramatically improved since his Wall days), both perfectly watchable matches in their own ways. As usual, a bunch of crap worthy of ff including Jarrett going berserk on a midget, Disco's segment which involved GoldyLocks (who at least didn't let herself bully) and some amazon looking girl from Tough enough (yeah, already recycling the lowest of the WWE rejects), and some awful stuff with Miss TNA and Bruce. And West is so awful. But the good stuff was really good. 2002.07.31 Elix Skipper vs AJ Styles 2002.07.31 Low-Ki vs Jerry Lynn 2002.07.31 Jeff Jarrett vs Scott Hall

He was truly a terrific worker. Only 54 years old. Sad news.

Nope, it's been going on for a while. "For the win !", "For the championship !", Cole does that all the time and kills pretty much every nearfalls with it. It's unbearable. I've noticed the same thing on the last NXT special too during the big matches. I barely watched the rest of the show, but damn those too elimination chambers match looked awful. And that Kalisto bump, not only was that useless, but it looked like crap too. Oh, and that Naomi/Paige botch was brutal.

I couldn't have said it better. They actually lost me during the final stretch, because it turned into the typical tepid WWE "epic" style, complete with Ownes using Cena's finisher, which is a cliché. Too bad, because it built to a very good match until then. So yeah, good match, terrific debut, but as always, let's see how they manage the following weeks and months. The fact that it was non-title doesn't tell me anything good for instance. Wait, what ? Did I miss an episode here ?

Fucking Vanes Naldi.

And really, that was all Rick Rubin wanting a wrestling mummy. And Mitchell's promo were dirtier than anything "shocking" Russo ever tried.

Thus far, TNA weekly PPV's murder WWECW in term of content, when you ff the crap. And yeah, I guess I'm masochistic. Well, in fact I know why I'm doing this... Episode 7 is still crap, but less so. First off we get a semi-decent ECW original match between Justin Credible and Balls Mahoney. Sadly it still has to end with Balls caving some craniums in with a chair, despite the match being "not extreme rules", which is stupid in itself if you're reviving ECW. Anyway. The whole Kelly angle is apparently leading to a Sandman & Dreamer feud with Knox & Test. Well, at least there's a ECW originals vs WWE guys thematic here, but Steroid Test is not a guy I want to watch. Then you get the debut of that vampire guy, who doesn't get an intro because we cut from a stupid backstage vignette in which Paul Heyman has his security guys beat Guido up and drag him to the ring. Poor Guido, he can work circles around anyone in this roster and he's at a sub-Barry Horowitz level it seems. The vampire guy looks like a metrosexual Twilight fan doing cosplay, he's not spooky at all (as opposed to Dave Heath who looked like a freak). I dig Ariel though. And then the main event of, oh man, Big Show vs Kane. And actually, this is probably the best match of the four Big Show macthes thus far. I wouldn't go that far to say it's good, but it certainly beats a generic Taker match or Ric Flair whoring himself to new lows. Kane looks better than Show here, and the fact they use gimmicks makes it easier to convey the idea that it's ECW we're talking about, although Show's bump through the table looks really deliberate. Of course everything kinda does, and they work a snail pace, but it's a little bit more of an actual garbage brawl this time. This will lead to Sabu vs Show, and the question is, will Sabu be able to drag something semi-interesting out of that big oaf ?

That's an interesting take. And yeah, Jarrett was insane with the chair shots. PPV 6 had some good stuff again, but this time the main event didn't deliver. Funniest moment during Sabu vs Ken Shamrock was Sabu going for a pinfall (in a ladder match), the ref counting and Tenay just explaining "It's ladder vs submission !". Pretty much a nothing match, and Sabu clearly wasn't into it probably because of his broken nose. He still managed to kill himself on a table spot to set up Shamrock climbing the ladder. Ending on a screwjob (yeah, in a ladder match) when Malice ran in. Ok, that wasn't good. Low-Ki vs Amazing Red was good in a very indie way, as Amazing Red really looks like your stereotytpical late 90's/early 00's indie wrestler, smaller than the referee and doing all kind of movie like moves and sequences. Not a big fan of those despite the fact it does look cool when it's smooth. So yeah, the most indieriffic worker of the bunch thus far. Low-Ki looks probably the best of all. Jerry Lynn & AJ Styles vs Flying Evis' (Estrada & Yang) was quite good, with Styles and Lynn on the same page before the inevitable screw-up by AJ on a dive, driving Lynn straight into the barricade. Lynn hits a gusher then proceeds to win the match, to the disgust of AJ, who's a glory hog and really looks like the heel now. He also at times looks sloppy and tries to do too much, especially on comebacks and hope spots which would require simpler stuff. Yang is the best of the Elvis'. Then there was a really good promo segment with The Truth, formerly K-Krush, cutting that racial oriented fuming promo before he gets interrupted by Monty Brown, who does a decent promo himself. I knew at some point the term "Uncle Tom" would be dropped. Killings really looks strong on the mic here and both look like potential stars. Good stuff. Later we get an angle where Elix Skipper betrays Browns, allowing Truth to choke him with a chain. In the decent category, Chris Harris & James Storm have a pretty good match with the Hot Shots. So yeah, a lot less crappy stuff (the Dupps, Jarrett acting "tough") and a few non offensive time killing (Brian Lawler vs Apollo, and Disco Inferno's introduction to his talk show, which wasn't too bad but I do fear the actual segment). 2002.07.24 Low-Ki vs Amazing Red 2002.07.24 Jerry Lynn & AJ Styles vs Flying Elvis' (Estrada & Yang)

Episode 6 is just as bad, if not worse than the previous one. Zero good match again. The best one consisting of a competitive squash of Stevie Richards by Sabu. Poor Stevie, after a 6 years career in the WWE, he's lower than Sabu on the totem pole than he was in ECW in 96. The rest of the show, well, a stupid angle with Tommy Dreamer and Paul E. leading to a Test feud. Test looks like Warrior without the paint and the tassles actually. A dull kick-punch exchange main event between Big Show & Taker, which isn't worked like an ECW match at all. So I guess Flair really whored himself for nothing the previous week since Taker apparently doesn't have to do nothing but his usual MMATaker routine, which clearly isn't his best work. And Show, again, shows me nothing more than bad punches, his stock is clearly dropping (not that I ever was a big Paul Wight fan, but still, this was supposed to be him being *good*) watching that kind of stuff. Well, and the ending is awful, with who else but the Great Kali showing up, and with the help of Show putting Taker through the announcers' table. I guess all that "compelling" work on Show's knee by Taker was for naught. And like this wasn't enough, we get Kelly getting caned by Sandman. The set-up was extremely poor, and the poor girl looked terrified to take the hit, yet she still took it like a trooper. Mike Knox just flew away after winning a bad match. So not only he doesn't like the fact Kelly is a striper (I refuse to call her exhibitionnist), but he's also a complete asshole on every level since he pushed Kelly in front of him. Kelly gets carried out on a stretcher (hey, just like that TNA show with Francine I just watched !) Not a single actual good match since episode three, and zero good angle since the beginning. That show is a winner thus far.

PPV 5 got even better, with a bunch of matches that I really enjoyed, and a few good promos. First off, Sabu showed up from nowhere and faced Malice in a ladder match. And that was one damn good ladder match based on inflicting punishment istead of trying to do stunts. The best Wall match I've seen, by a large margin, and the proff Sabu could still deliver. He actually bust his nose pretty bad here, and gets killed post match too. Malice takes one hell of a bump leading to the finish that makes sense, imagine that. Then, The Flying Elvis' vs Chris Daniels & Elix Skipper was a fine little match too, with Siaki being a funny egomaniac taking his place at the announcing both and refering to himself at the third person. And finally, AJ Styles vs Low-Ki was quite good too. A little bit your-turn my-turn of course, but the fact they actually sold the damage didn't turn this into a video game cluster. Low-Ki is actually better than Styles at this point, his selling and bumping his excellent. Styles kinda waste a brutal brainbuster in a very indieriffic way of working. But all in all, really good. However, the whole AJ Styles vs Jerry Lynn feud goes way too far into trying to maim your rival after just two weeks. And really, after Lynn cuts a decent promo on Styles, you get Styles attacking him from behind, so at the end of the day we really have no idea who's suppose dto be the face. I guess no one. K-Krush cuts a pretty good frustrated promo too and we get a match against Norman Smiley, which is always nice to see although Smiley is in full WCW gimmick mode. To end the show, Scott Hall and Brian Lawler have a perfectly decent TV match, Hall even busting out his second rope back suplex. Brian is not much on offense, but his old-school comedy heel selling is quite effective to me. Then of course we get Jarrett busting everyone with chairs, because he's a bad ass, you see. So, if you ff through the shit (midgets and catfights), it was not a bad effort of a TV show, despite the ridiculous booking at times. And one thing that is disturbing is the treatment of women. Goldylocks sole purpose seems to be insulted and physically threatened, and we get to see the Blue Meanie DDTing Francine, who ends up on a gurney after a catfight with Jasmine St Clair aka "What the fuck is she doing in the wrestling business anyway ?". This extremely trashy aspect of the product really hurt the perception of a company that is called TNA to begin with. 2002.07.17 Sabu vs Malice 2002.07.17 Flying Elvis' (Estrada & Siaki) vs Chris Daniels & Elix Skipper 2002.07.17 AJ Styles vs Low-Ki

Yeah but you see that's the thing. Flair didn't work "death match style" either. There Flair worked like a shitty garbage guy from IWA Japan in the mid 90's. And I have to say that I've seen Nakamaki look better than this actually (not much, but still). Really, Flair emulating Gypsie Joe is not exactly a compliment any way you slice it.

Episode 5 WWE-like promo by Heyman, who's now a corporate heel owner of ECW I guess. How creative. So, we get Test and Dreamer in a bad match. Test looks like he's gonna explode. Yeah, looking roided up and fucking divas surely was a great way to live. But I already outlived him by 6 years, so who looks stupid now ? Nothing match between Sabu and Justin Cedible, which ends up by DQ because although we're in ECW, it's not an extreme rules match. Ok, this show is stupid. Poor Justin looked bad BTW. CM Punk is coming. Cool. That vampire guy is coming, and he's got Ariel with him. Cool. Shannon Moore is coming, and he looks like a minion of Dump Matsumoto. Hum… not sure. And now we get to the infamous Flair vs Big Show match. Ok, I've heard enough time that Flair reinvented himself as a garbage worker and was awesome. I always took it with a grain of salt, to say the least. Now I see this match. Ok people, Flair looks like shit. He bumps awkward, he looks old as dirt, he bleeds like a pig and can't do anything but chops. And no, he works nothing like Onita. I mean not at all. Using a bunch of props, bleeding profusely, using a barb wire baseball bat and taking a sloppy bump on thumbtacks doesn't make him an Onita-like worker. It makes him look like the shittiest Shoji Nakamaki ever. And the Big Show just isn't very good either BTW. This match is trash, I've probably seen the same stuff in IWA Japan circa 95 between Leatherface and Hiroshi Oono, and it didn't look that much worse. It's actually pretty pathetic to watch Flair do that shit (poorly I might add) at his age when twenty years before he was an all time great. So, this TV show is pretty much garbage. Oh, yes, there was one good segment : Kelly Kelly and Candice Michelle (whoever she was) doing some erotic dance before Mike Knox came spoiling the fun. Then the Sandman shows up and canes Knox down the stage. That was nice. Candice was a better dancer than Kelly, too.

Wait, what ? You can't say that. "Le plus ça change" but it doesn't sound so good. "Plus ça change" would work the best. (sorry about that...) I'd make a lousy Québécois. Correction noted (with thanks). Québécois speaks lousy French anyway. (well, let's say a different kind of French, but I love quebecers)

Wait, what ? You can't say that. "Le plus ça change…" but it doesn't sound so good. "Plus ça change…" would work the best. (sorry about that...)