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Charles (Loss)

[1994-02-05-SMW-TV] Interview: Dory & Terry Funk

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This was tremendous. Dory though seems like he has no idea what time, or year it is. Heck he's reciting TXDM rules like he did in the 70's.

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Terry is just the funniest and most outrageous person in this. But that's why he's awesome. Dory's hat is something else. I can't focus with his hat on the screen.

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Knoxville smells like BUTT CRACK USA -- cheap wine, unholy women, illegal politicians and fear! Terry is awesome, Dory is awful.

Word.

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Funk's description of the Armstrong kids has me rolling. You can tell Tonya and Nancy were heavy in the news, because they're getting referenced left and right all over wrestling TV.

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Terry & Dory are going to Knoxville, but what does it smell like? It smells like butt crack, USA. What does that smell like? That smells like cheap wine, unholy women, illegal politicians and fear; fear that seeps out of every pore of Bob Armstrong. He warns him not to have his family try to come and help him, as Dory will not only be protecting Jim Cornette, but he will be keeping an eye out for all those illegitimate fools, idiots, perverts and pukes that he claims are sired from him. He fears no evil, fears no-one and doesn’t fear any of those fools who’ll be at ringside because unlike that ice skaters husband who failed, he’ll have his branding iron with him and will take out their legs. Dory wakes from his slumber to repeat himself from last week’s interview and go over the rules of the Texas death match again.

 

Very similar to the previous week's interview and Dory genuinely comes across that he has no idea what's going on or where he is!

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I still say that Dory deliberately chooses to be bland on interviews with Terry so Terry's craziness stands out more. I'm not saying that he's another Dusty Rhodes by himself, but if he was as bad as he comes off here, he wouldn't have been NWA World champion for four years, even in the early seventies when talk didn't mean as much.

 

It continues to amaze me the kind of language SMW gets away with, considering their geographic location and the religiousness of a good portion of their audience. The latest example? Terry using the word "schmuck" to describe some of the many theoretical Armstrong relatives who could come out to help Bullet Bob. There are worse words than schmuck, of course, but that's still a pretty nasty word in the Bible Belt.

 

Let's hope we get some different lines from Terry next week. As good as describing Knoxville as Buttcrack, U.S.A. is, it tends to lose its punch the third time it's repeated (as it will be if he uses it again).

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