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Cena vs Kevin Federline - Raw 1st January 2007

 

This was less of a match and more of a RAW segment. Neither here nor there really. I kept waiting for the punchline, which was Umaga interfering. Not a bad segment, but not really enlightening as far as Cena goes.

 

I think I'll watch the first Rock match and maybe the Michaels Wrestlemania match and call it a day on Cena. If I vote for him he'll be somewhere in the 80-100 range. He's not really a talented enough performer for me to rate higher and I'd rather focus my attention on finishing the Mysterio matches Jimmy recommended as I've enjoyed all of those.

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I hated the blocked brain chop because it meant the brain chop was blocked

 

 

Man, I loved that spot. In fact, I specifically remember the RAW where the Khali feud was first introduced and they brawled on the entrance ramp and Cena caught the chop and tried to transition it into an FU. At that moment I knew that the night after Judgment Day I would soon be accused of trolling because I was sure the match would end up being good and I'd praise it. Sure enough I was right, I loved that match.

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Yeah I just went and rewatched the Khali match out of interest. It's still awesome.

 

On Cena's punches, if you're someone who cares about the good execution of punches then Cena is probably going to annoy you on that front no matter what - his punches are notoriously loose/goofy/bad. But on the specific point of the Khali match, the body shots Cena was throwing at Khali, particularly early on, I think it kind of helps that they look so lame. It just furthers the story they were telling, which was that Khali was an unstoppable monster and Cena was powerless against him. So his punches (which, bad-looking or not, are always sold by opponents) being completely ineffective was an easy way to get that across.

 

The same way that when Khali first goes for a pin cover, instead of kicking out Cena puts his foot on the rope. It's the first pin attempt of the match and SuperCena can't even kick out. Just another little touch to demonstrate that he's facing something completely new and formidable that he'll struggle to even withstand, let alone overcome.

 

To me, more than anything, the Khali match is an achievement. When people talk about what Flair got out of Gigante and how it shows what a worker he was...this is Cena's. I mean, I like Khali. I really do. I found him fun, I get an inordinate amount of enjoyment from the Khali Chop, and over the years before he completely broke down I think he had a surprising number of good matches with assorted people. But this isn't a random Smackdown match. This was the MAIN EVENT of a PPV. It's not enough to just bounce off him a few times and get something fun and watchable out of him. They had to do something special, something worthy of main eventing a show that people paid good money to see. They had to follow a Hardy Boyz tag, Benoit vs MVP, an Edge main event...it was a good undercard and it went heavy on workrate and action. In fact 2007 as a whole for WWE up to that point went heavy on workrate and action. Cena vs Shawn, Undertaker vs Batista, Benoit vs MVP, the Hardyz run, Orton & Edge...it was all very workrate-y stuff, with shows headlined by Meltzer ****+ matches, a lot of really good undercards and a LOT of great TV matches.

 

And now Cena has to come out and follow all of that up and deliver a PPV main event with KHALI, a guy who the last time he was booked in a PPV main event was replaced at the last minute after being advertised for fear that he'd suck THAT badly. And so Cena goes out there with no gimmicks, no blood, no bells and whistles, takes the Great Khali and has not just a watchable match, but a really, genuinely good, memorable match that had the crowd going apeshit and gave everybody their money's worth. He delivered above and beyond what most people would have considered him capable of. And since the Cena feud, like I said I think Khali had some good matches, but I don't think he ever had anything this good or special ever again. Cena got something out of him that nobody else could.

 

And the most interesting thing of all to me is that Cena went even further next time by having a genuinely great PPV main event with Bobby Lashley, a guy who I think was arguably even worse than Khali. He definitely didn't have as many good matches in WWE as Khali. And he never, EVER had a match anywhere near as good as his Cena match. Nothing in the same universe. Cena getting that match out of him is one of the biggest, most impressive "carryjobs" in recent memory.

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  • 2 weeks later...

John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels (04/01/07)

 

I don't like modern WWE main event style, I'm not fond of HBK, and I'm predisposed not to like Cena much. So I thought if I was going to do this, I might as well go the full hog and start right in the deep end. On paper this has nothing at all to do with why I'm a wrestling fan, but I'm going to try my best to keep an open mind.

 

This is, of course, from Wrestlemania 23 in Detroit. Shawn comes out with his DX music, -1/2* just for that -- I kid, I kid. Lillian Garcia is on the introductions here, I think it's a shame they stopped wheeling Fink out for Mania. JR says that he doesn't think he's ever seen a better "big match wrestler" than Shawn Michaels. Apparently at this time Cena and Michaels were Tag Team champs. I literally couldn't hate HBK's entrance more here, so I won't say any more about it. It's going on forever and ever though and I can barely hear the record-breaking crowd. There's a Ford Mustag speeding through the streets of Detroit. This is putrid, horrible stuff. Come on for fuck's sake get on with it, I just want the match to begin. Car comes screeching into the arena. I hate this, I really do. Cena's music pipes in and he gets out of the car. Michaels stands in the ring sucking in his cheeks. Couldn't care less about anything so far. This production stuff is the worst of the worst shit. GET ON WITH IT.

 

Ref holds up the spinner belt and it looks like we're finally going to get going. Michaels sits on the turnbuckle and makes a sort of clown face and waves to some fans. Stays on the turnbuckle. Cena looks at him with some focus. Michaels offers a left-handed hand shake but then slaps Cena in the face. DX crotch shot. I'm assuming he's the heel here -- he's certainly the fucking heel from where I'm sitting. Hammerlock by Michaels to start. Cena swings and misses. Michaels with a flurry of punches sends Cena down. Cena looks pensive. I can't really understand what he's going for here, or what's going through his mind. This has been a persistent problem with all the Cena I've seen to date. What are you thinking about John? I mean what the fuck is this? Champion for the emo generation?

 

Elbow and collar tieup. Shoulder barges into the shoulder of Cena. Into a headlock. Headlock takeover. Headlock down on the mat now. Another headlock takedown. Michaels traps the arm into the headlock to work this shoulder a bit more. But some rope running now results in a big clothesline for Cena on Michaels. Now, I have to pause this here. There is WAY too much of this fucking psych-out "epic" shit going on in this match. I just don't like this style of working. Okay, he hit a clothesline. Oooooh. Does he have to stand and look thoughtful after it like he's writing War and Peace after it? All this milking of every move is very tiresome, how long must it go on for until this match actually starts?

 

After about 30 seconds more of this, we get a shoulder barge from Cena. Dick 80,000 Detroit crowd boos him and cheers Michaels. Hiptoss to the outside by Michaels. Big reverse knife edge by Michaels and an inzaguri. Now a big moonsault onto the announce table. Again I want to pause here. About 10 minutes into this match what's happened?

 

1. Psyche out, Michaels controls some of the match vaguely focusing on Cena's shoulder.

2. Clothesline!! Oooooh

3. More psyche out.

4. Straight to brawling outside ring and a moonsault from the ring to the table on the outside.

 

To me this has had zero flow or psychology or anything. What was the point of the early shoulder work? Why did they have to pause for about a minute to register Cena's clothesline? What's John THINKING about so much? We're going straight into this big high spot after an opening 7-8 minutes consisting entirely of trying to generate the feeling of an epic through ... pensive looks. It's crap. It might have worked once ever, when it was Warrior vs. Hogan, but I'm not buying it here so far in this match.

 

Cena has hurt his back now. Back in the ring and Michaels hits another Flair chop. Elbow smash. Another big chop. Cena is dazed and wobbly from the big assult outside. Michaels smashes Cena on the knee now. He attacks the leg now. I have to say, his assult on this leg is quite intense. He whacks the leg around the ring post. Knee drop on the leg. Chop block on the leg. This is some good work here by Michaels and Cena's selling is very good. Big chop by Michaels here. He wraps Cena's leg around the rope and Cena cries out in pain. Another chop block by Michaels. And this has been well worked. If the crowd had been paying attention, they'd be booing the fuck out of Michaels by this point because he's really heeling it up here too. Cena comes back with a couple of strikes, they boo him -- which is the incorrect response. Big charge by Michaels. Cena's left leg is out here. Big chop by Michaels. He charges again but Cena evades and Michaels blows his shoulder out on the ringpost, looks like he's bleeding hardway from it. Cena continutes selling this leg. Big clothesline by Cena. And some big right hands. Go on John! Beat the shit out of him!

 

Cena hits a slam of some sort. Nurses his leg a bit. Does his "you can't see me" thing and hits the five knuckle shuffle. Okay, that was crap. Took me out of a match that I was getting into. Michaels goes for sweet chin music but it lands in the face of the ref who is out. Cena goes for the FU but Michaels counters into a DDT. Ref is still out. Michaels is bloody and snarling. He goes outside to get the ring steps. Drags Cena out. Piledriver!!! On the steel steps. Spike piledriver on the steps! Wow. Cena is out. How can the fans cheer this prick? Cena looks like he might be bleeding from the top of the head -- who was it that said that piledrivers don't hurt the top of the head? Another ref comes running out and Michaels covers for 2.

 

Cena has taken a fucking battering in this match. Michaels gets him up for an Irish whip, reversed! Michaels hits a flying clothesline and a kip up. Cena is out. Michaels goes up to the top rope. Randy Savage elbow drop! Michaels stands around posing now. Gorilla and Jesse wouldn't like that. Oh, he's going over to "charge up" his sweet chin music. Retarded spot. And Cena goes over to clothesline him, massive clothesline. Chop by Michaels. Big rights back and forth now. Cena goes for the FU but Michaels counters with a cradle for two. Cena goes for the FU again and hits it! Crowd actually pops, I think they do anyway. Michaels is out. Cena crawls over to cover. One, two, NO! Cena puts him on the turnbuckle, is he going for a superplex? No, FU! From the top! No, Michaels punches him down. From the top now by HBK. Crossbody. Momentum takes him over, Cena stands up with him in the slam position. FU again? No! Michaels counters. Some nearfalls now, Cena powers out of an inside cradle. Hot sequence. Michaels misses an inzaguri and Cena locks in the STFU. Is he going to tap? Michaels struggles. Crowd is really hot now and cheer wildly as Michaels makes it to the ropes. Ref is a bit overzealous in shouting at Cena. Michaels hits sweet chin music again now. And Cena is out again. I want to pause here once more.

 

While there has been some very hot stuff in the preceding ten minutes or so, I want to note that it has essentially been a long series of both guys going for their finishers, and then ... going for their finishers again. I just want to note that now so I can come back to it later.

 

Back to the match. Michaels crawls over to cover. One, two, NO! No doubt at all that Cena would kick out. They get up at the nine count. Some counters and counter-counters now but it results in another STFU by Cena. Michaels taps. And there it is, Cena wins. JR says "what a match".

 

I thought this was a mixed bag. The first ten minutes were torture for me. Then things really picked up with Michaels appearing to want to take Cena to wrestling school and destroying his leg. It was almost like the match started properly at that point, after the big bullshit moonsault on the announce table to pop the crowd. This segment of the match, Michaels working over Cena's leg -- I'm going to call it the heat sequence, because even if the crowd weren't booing him, HBK was "structurally" the heel here -- was really good stuff. And Cena's comeback in the stretch was heated and great. Then this sense of energy and heat drained out of the match when Cena went to his five knuckle shuffle crap. Maybe it's just a sign of the times, but that really took me out of a match that was heating up. Then, this match goes into another gear. Michaels gets colour, and then sees red by delivering the piledriver to Cena on the steps. And the heat comes back into the match. However, from this point on they essentially go into one LONG finishing sequence. And this has some great, great stuff in it, but why can Cena only do two moves (FU, STFU) and Michaels only do two moves (sweet chin music, top rope elbow drop)? I don't get why the match had to shift so quickly into false-finish-ville. They'd built it great to that point. I thought the near falls were very effectively worked, but it felt like they went to each well once too often to me? How many FUs were there? How many STFUs? How many sweet chin musics? Has anyone heard of, y'know, a suplex, or a bodyslam, or ... just any other moves? So that finishing stretch, while "hot" also bugged me quite a bit. Finally, the crowd were moronic in this match. I was certainly cheering Cena on during this and thought he worked pretty much perfectly as a babyface here -- minus all the pensive BS crap early on -- his selling is very good, his clotheslines remind a bit of Lex Luger's (praise from me). Michaels was very good on offense here in stretches, but I thought he ran out of ideas towards the end of the match. But it was interesting to see a match where he controlled about 75% of offence. The good stuff in this match is great, the bad stuff to me is terrible. So on balance, I'm going to say ...

 

***3/4

 

I might check out the much-talked about RAW match from 07 as well, because I do think these two have a great match in them, just don't think this is quite it. This is about two thirds of a great match and one third all of the things I hate about modern WWE main event style.

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SELLING BODY PARTS

Cena vs Shawn Michaels - Wrestlemania 23

 

I liked this a lot. The early stuff didn't bother me at all. They chose a story and stuck with it. I disagree that there was no flow or psychology to it. I thought it was psychologically sound and fairly straight forward. You could certainly argue that the psych-outs and pensive looks were lame, but I appreciate that they stuck to their guns, and importantly (for me) I was pleased that Michaels made an effort to make the momentum shift significant by blading from the shoulder-into-the-corner post transition. That made Cena's rush of adrenaline more tolerable than usual and I didn't even mind the five knuckle shuffle in that context. The bridge from the early psych-out work to the finishing stretch wasn't so smooth; Michaels was worn too a little too quickly for my liking, but the finishing stretch itself I thought was excellent. I actually thought it was an example of finishing trading done well as opposed to the more video game looking stuff. There were enough variations on the set-up for each finisher to keep me interested and the nearfalls were great. I especially liked the superkick where Cena was caught off guard by arguing with the ref. In fact, Cena's acting during that stretch deserves some praise considering how harsh I've been on a lot of his selling/acting throughout this thread. The match wasn't an all-time classic or anything, but they exceeded my expectations and delivered a strong main event match. I liked it better than the RAW rematch. I'll give it ****

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  • 6 months later...

Pasting over reviews from this thread: http://prowrestlingonly.com/index.php?/topic/20910-jaaawn-cena/

 

Still don't know why we have two Cena threads.

 

John Cena vs CM Punk (7/11/11)

 

This is from Chicago, Money in the Bank. I really wanted to enjoy this match more than I did. I didn't takes notes because I wanted to take it in as a fan. Felt very disjointed and spot orientated to me. Something about this style just doesn't resonate with me at all as a wrestling fan. Kick outs can't substitute for psychology.

 

There are some sick sick spots here. Punk's knee to Cena's head. The knee into the gut. Cena's leg drop from the top. But I didn't connect with this at all and can't really understand what the guys in the roundtable were hyping. I don't understand on what planet something like this would get the same rating as Flair vs Steamboat at the Chi-town Rumble.

 

Maybe this is one of those deals where you had to be there, but I was really really disappointed with it.

 

***3/4

John Cena vs Brock Lesnar (4/29/12)

 

This is also from Chicago. Again, no notes from me just going to take it in and review after.

 

Okay this was fan-fucking-tastic. All-time great babyface performance from Cena, all-time great monster heel performance from Brock. Tremendous psychology and superb storytelling. Totally amazing match. Easy *****

 

And possibly the most brutal match in WWF/E history. Cena's fire and rage in the closing moments is for the ages. One of the most authentic and genuine moments I've seen out of the modern product. So so good.

I have to watch an hour long fucking Don Muraco match later on for Titans. I might have to watch that 81 footage in spurts and think I might review Cena matches in the interim.

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This requires more thought, but the only Cena matches I've liked less on rewatch are the two WM mains with Rock, which sucked even live at the time. Hip-Hop Cena in particular is a great comedic character that became a believable character who people got behind, which is kind of the ideal WWE model: start off bombastic and crazy, get over because crowds buy into your status (Savage, Bret, Austin, Eddy). Cena's matches would also benefit from being viewed independent of the dull, repetitive booking that he's had to overcome. The Cena backlash is less a reaction to his wrestling and more to his character. I should rewatch the two big Cena-Michaels matches, as that era of HBK is second only to the Angle match for divisive "Michaels is the best/worst" reactions.

 

Not even sure if Cena would make my list, but he's borderline and all the admiration of Dusty this week gives me acute respect for guys booked in the main event. You can say that's biased and that others would have excelled given the same opportunities, but no worker - or match for that matter, which is to say, work of art - exists in a bubble. Cena is judged by obscenely high expectations of what he is or could have been, and he's someone who shined in the spotlight and rose to the opportunity he was given, particularly in spite of bad booking and a lack of career variety.

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John Cena vs. Kevin Owens (5/31/15)

 

I ended up watching this three times, and I've got to say it was much better without commentary. I can't stand the way the WWE commentators step on each other's toes all the time and Layfield peeved me off by claiming that Magic and Bird were already in the NBA while Dr J was playing for the ABA. Also that NBA Countdown style panel the Network has where the wrestler's mimic the same intonation as those ESPN crews is hokey as shit.

 

This was the first time for me to see Owens wrestler so I had absolutely no basis of comparison. At first I thought he was weak on the mic, but his understated delivery grew on me and I dig his accent. The early beat down stuff was pretty generic. It wasn't bad, but there was no hook and it didn't relate to the rest of the match. As soon as Cena mounted his comeback it turned into a back and forward finishers battle with not much in the way of a middle (more of a bridge from the early wear down stuff to the kick outs and near falls.) Owens didn't really brawl as such, but the commentators kept putting over his fighting gimmick so I thought he could have been a bit more aggressive.

 

Cena has some of the worst transitions of any major wrestler I can think of. I don't get how a guy who works such a choreographed style can have such terrible transitions. He also has poor punches, awful moves (like the springboard stunner and that shoulder tackle thing), can't sell very well and has poor pacing and sense of building from one section of a match to another, but it's those transitions that get me. The shuffle step he took after the missed moonsault was the most glaring, but there were two or three other transitions where he "wrote him a letter" as Kent Walton would say. And that's on top of the audible spot calling. I did like the finishing stretch and I thought Cena's first lariat was the best part of the match (especially on the replay), but the finish was weak. I get that they wanted it to be flukey, but I'm a firm believer in escalating near falls and ending a match on the right beat and that wasn't the right beat. In fact, the counter of the superplex probably would have been a better finish even though it didn't involve what I suppose is meant to be Owens' signature move. Or they could have just gone a few more beats instead of having it come after a string of hotter moves.

 

Some of Owens' hybrid Dick Togo/Vader moveset is cool, and I guess his performance was better than Cena's as I don't think Cena was all that good in this bout. Overall, the bout was okay as the first match in a three match mini-program, though at the risk of upsetting people even more, it seems to me that people add a lot more to the narrative than the wrestlers or commentators provide as this really felt like a fair simply May to July mini feud and not overly important in the career of John Cena. But maybe it takes a further turn with Cena's reaction to the loss. I'd go about ** 3/4 stars on this.

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Cena's greatest asset in the Owens match was his credibility. That he has so many admitted micro-level flaws in his game doesn't bug me so much because his position as the active elder statesman really adds big stakes to matches where guys are trying to unseat him. I think the run as U.S. champ has been one of the highlights of his career. So yeah, I do agree that Owens was the star here, which means the match worked as designed. We've (well, maybe not you specifically, but some) often talked about how we wished guys would actually work for heat and play to the crowd more. Kevin Owens brings that in a way no one else is doing, which leads me to believe that while there are some style edicts at play, a lot of the reason other guys don't do that boils down to personal choice in how they perform. This is the type of match I suspect won't look as good in a few years, even if Owens sticks as a superstar, but what made this match great for me is the little touches KO brings that no one else cares to do. It was a contrast to the WWE norm. Excitement over that may blind me a little, but in the now, this match works really well for me.

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What's interesting about Steen is that he's essentially born & bred by the New Generation (and later Attitude Era) WWF. He's a huge fan boy, with major blind spots in terms of his knowledge of the business. This has been openly admitted & confirmed on his part, so it's not like it's some wild assumption or guesswork on my part.

 

But I say all that, because I think it offers an interesting window through which we can look at how her performs. He's always taken crowd participation & interaction to another level in his body of work, and I don't know if that comes from his early WWF exposure or just personal preference that he picked up AFTER the fact as he started working actual matches.

 

Sorry to derail the thread away from Cena for the moment, but I really couldn't help but agree with much of what Loss was saying about WHY Owens is clicking & resonating on another level right now. It's more about the little things coming together than one big component on its own, but yeah. It's something you can see left & right on the smaller scale, but it's really refreshing on the big stage - where it borders on being almost a taboo or foreign concept because it's been absent (or at least sparse) for so long.

 

I guess some could point to Jericho's 08 and 09 run for a similar kind of crowd interaction & showmanship, and that's fair. But there IS very good reason why that run was so highly regarded at its time.

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John Cena vs. Kevin Owens (5/31/15)

 

First of all, credit where it is due: the WWE seem to have made a concerted effort to make the belts mean something and Cena's bit of business kissing the belt before the match helped to get the IC title over as something that was important.

 

This is my first time seeing Kevin Owens and I was very very unimpressed with his character work, which was actively bad. He has virtually no star presence, like the total opposite of a Riki Choshu. He might have been in front of 20,000 people or in a high school gym, he doesn't come off as a star in either context I don't think. Might be just me, but the guy had no aura at all. When he did the "you can't see me" to virtually no reaction it exposed that brutally.

 

As for the match, it sucked. After the first five minutes they quickly moved into the false finish spam routine. It reminded me of the Wrestlemania match with The Rock. Part of my issue with this style is in the pacing. Goes something like this.

 

- Guy hits finisher or other high impact move.

- Time passes

- Cover

- OH NO, HE KICKED OUT

- Fucking TIME PASSES

- More time passes

- Guy hits another finisher or other high impact move.

- Rinse repeat

 

It's fucking painful. And if you note down what actualy happened in the body of this match, that's all there was to it.

 

I really didn't think Kevin Owens looked very good here. I understand some of the context that it was his first match in the big time, but he had all the ring presence of an early 90s WCW jobber as his name was being half-announced half-mocked by Gary Michael Cappetta. His punches and things were nothing special. I'd like to see him do something outside of the context of this god-awful match structure. As for Cena, nothing I haven't seen before. He seemed to be more over with the crowd than I've seen in the past though.

 

**

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John Cena vs. Chris Jericho (11/23/08)

 

Ha ha, the very first thing Cena tries to do in this match is an FU, start as you mean to go on? Jericho's character work, in marked contrast to that of Kevin Owens, is very good. He carries himself well, good heel, natrual charisma.

 

The big story of this match is that Cena is coming back from neck surgery. We get a strange transition where Cena goes to the top rope, then thinks twice about it and then comes down and steps back into the ring which allows Jericho to attack him. Not the transition I'd have booked as an agent. Just strange. I want to pause here:

 

Cena, it seems to me, does more "pregnant pauses", more "I'm looking around pensively at the crowd", more "I'm going to stop here so the camera can get a good close up of my determined looking face", than just about any wrestler that I've ever seen. And this is one of the things that bugs me, all of that shit really slows down the pace of these matches. Every single pregnant pause is a moment where TIME PASSES. A lot of time passes in Cena matches.

 

There is an awful moment in this match where Cena pauses for what seems like a full 30 seconds before doing his "you can't see me" thing, while Jericho just has to lay there the whole time. That sort of thing breaks my suspension of disbelief. All wrestling is fake but some wrestling is more fake. Jericho "saves" the spot because he was playing possum but it's still awful. Blame the agent, blame Cena, it's a bad spot.

 

Anyway, Jericho capitalises on this neck injury and works an uber-focused gameplan. Levelling him with clotheslines. Chinlocks. FULL NELSON!! Modified Walls of Jericho. A lot of moves focused on the neck. Decent psychology, but the work is not that interesting.

 

I want to pause here again. Because this is something I haven't seen much of before in Cena matches (due to finisher spam): an actual extended heat sequence with a technically-minded heel working holds and controlling the action. His selling is strange. His "determination" is strange. He doesn't really generate sympathy with his selling. We're a million miles away from guys like Jack Brisco, Ricky Steamboat and Rick Martel here. All of those guys, for example, when in a full nelson like that would wave their arms quite a bit either to signify struggle or to show how much pain they were in. Cena when in the full nelson just lets his arms hang down limp as if he's dead. Later on, when he's in the walls of Jericho we don't get pain either, we get "I am determined to make it to the ropes, I may be in pain but I am the will of the American people and I will make it to those ropes. I am a marine!" It's partly a character thing, but it's interesting. Hogan didn't sell like that, Hogan made it seem like he was dying during heat sequences and then you'd get a comeback. The closest thing I can compare it to is Backlund, but Cena shows more "vulnerability" than Backlund, even though that vulnerability manifests itself in a weird way. I think the main issue I have with all of this is that he makes EVERYTHING seems as if it is an internal struggle for inner strength RATHER than a battle against an opponent and his moves. So when Jericho has him in the Walls, he's not really getting over the pain of the move but the narrative of him overcoming his inner fears and regaining his confidence. It sort of buries Jericho rather than putting his offense over.

 

Anyway, it's downhill from here because shortly after that Jericho starts doing some retarded spots which involve him hitting a clothesline and then waiting an AGE for Cena to get back up to clothesline him again. Why doesn't he just follow up? Again, blame the agent, blame Jericho, but there is a lot of TIME PASSING in between these clotheslines and Cena's counter was telegraphed a million miles off.

 

The finish lacked any sort of excitement too because it was framed completely by the commentary team in terms of Cena getting over his injury and regaining his confidence. I mean fuck Chris Jericho and the match we just watched, he was only keeping the belt warm, the important thing to push it Cena's back from his injury! Terrible presentation on top of a not-very-good match.

 

Didn't like this much at all. Jericho worked a smart match as an old-school heel champion, but Cena's odd "internalness" as well as the commentary team destroyed his heat segment from actually meaning anything, and then it was like the match was forgotten about almost the second it was over. Reminded me of Hogan vs. Flair at Halloween Havoc when they transitioned immediately into the Butcher feud. It was like "yeah, Flair doesn't matter". That was Jericho here. He did his best, but he couldn't save this.

 

**1/2

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I'm not exactly a PWO veteran but it wasn't hard to figure out your gripes with modern WWE style and conclude you'd think e.g. the Cena-Owens match is shit. Have you seen the Cena-Umaga Last Man Standing match? It's very atypical for a WWE title match and one of Cena's greatest performances. And more importantly, I reckon it's something you would actually consider quite good, if not great.

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Yeah to reitterate: start with Umaga. Stsrt with 2007.

 

The Shawn TV match has a long finishing stretch, but it is also worked in a more old school way with the opening headlocks and shit, so he may at least find it more recognisable.

 

Issues with the pregnant pauses and stuff I can't really fix because that's just the style. And even within the style Cena is pretty overwrought.

 

The point about Cena selling determination rather than pain is a key one, and helps express the point I was trying to make ages ago about why Cena doesn't do limbwork. For Cena, moves don't physically hurt his body as much as they mentally test his will to go on. 'Never Give Up' is a philosophy that permeates everything to do with Cena. He's a walking avatar for determination.

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John Cena vs. Umaga (01/07/07)

 

Okay, turns out this was the wrong match which I'm thankful for because I was about to say "WTF people!"

 

This didn't have a lot to it. Umaga worked some basic Samoan offense including some nerve holds and various Samoan drops. Cena came back and won with an inside cradle. It's any babyface vs. monster match you've ever seen only with more pregnant pausing, more "time passing" and less selling. I will say that Jim Ross on commentary is an upgrade to the bland team on later WWE events.

 

**

 

Now for that Last Man Standing match.

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John Cena vs. Umaga (01/28/07)

 

Wow, stone cold classic. I suspect there's already been enough written about this. I has a classic setup, Cena the babyface hero and champion is coming in with an abdominal injury which Umaga the monster than target. The early going with Umaga working bearhugs and other spots to target that area are good enough, but this kicks into overdrive after Cena does the five knuckle shuffle onto the steel steps in the middle of the ring. Shortly after that he nails an FU onto the steps and in so doing injures his own head on the way down. When he comes up he is gushing blood and Umaga immediately switches from attacking the injured mid-section to attacking the cut. A ton of sick spots that I've never seen before ensue including: a shot where Cena blows a monitor on Umaga's head, Umaga running over two announce tables to splash into a third and Armando Estrada using a wrench to dismantle one of the turnbuckles. What puts this over the top though is the finish: Cena choking Umaga out like a psychopath with his face covered in blood is a fantastic visual and it has that same visceral and emotional hit as the Brock Lesnar Extreme Rules match.

 

What I particularly liked about this one is that it felt organic and unscripted in a way that many of Cena's other matches don't. The finish with Umaga first of all getting to his knees after 2 but then staying down after the final psycho choke was very un-WWE-like. Fantastic match.

 

*****

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