Autistic Dragon

WWF sends King Kong Bundy to AWA in exchange for Billy Jack Haynes.

Portland. The Thrillseekers continue to get over. Bam Bam politely turns down the Brigade. Dibiase and the OWC are too much for the Money Train. Where the Brigade fails in recruitment, The Citadel has people volunteering. DDP decides to cut to the chase and officially give Austin the boot. Hot Rod strikes his first blow against the Playboy Club. Hashimoto tames the Italian Stallion. Portland night 2. Dr Death wins the battle of the Oakies. Piper's psychological campaign continues. The Force score their first win over Camp Cornette. With Sabu's return the Hexagon is complete and victorious. Two successful defenses close out the night. Eugene. The Irishmen give the Thrillseekers their first loss. A bloodied Awesome takes down PCO. The Money Train breaks Cornette's heart. Lover Boy pushes Regal to the limit. Bigelow's hot streak continues. A successful defense by Azul sends us home.

After so much talk of Maeda being the front man for UWF I thought for sure he'd be the first champion but Sayama wins it for Shooto.

The Madness has been unleashed and Savage goes on a absolute rampage to avenge his family honor. Lawler shows his class by responding to Savage's accusation of insulting his father by.... actually insulting his father. Also Angelo Poffo is a "criminal" for running cards in Kentucky but it's okay to work with Bert who literally ran cards in Memphis? Gotta be honest Jerry seems like a bit of a double standard. Dutch gets perhaps the purest kind of heel heat there is, making a kid cry. Love the Stud Stable bragging that they now get to us the Freebird rule. Dustin vows to continue the fight. DWB is back and is looking after payback against Brad.

January 4, 1990. William B. Finneran Pavilion in Villanova, Pennsylvania. *Andre the Giant & Ultimate Warrior stand in from of a WWF banner* Warrior: As the celestial powers usher in a new decade and the Warriors around the world brace themselves for the challenges that await them in the coming solar cycle, the Gods have decreed that the Wonder of the World and myself are to strike the first blow that shall lead to the crumbling of the Heenan Famly! Andre: Bobby Heenan, so help me you stick your nose in our business i'll knock you into the next millennium! *Smash cut to Bobby Heenan, King Haku & Rick Rude in front of the same banner* Heenan: Listen up humanoids! You thought the 80s were something? The 90s are gonna rock your world and it starts tonight when the Heenan Family solves two of its biggest problems in one fell swoop. Tell'em champ. Rude: Nobody brings the New Year in with as much style as the Heenan Family and tonight we close the book on the so-called Ultimate Warrior and the 8th Blunder of the World, Andre the Giant. *Haku fires three rapid fire jabs at the camera as it cuts to Terry Funk, Manny Fernandez & Dick Murdoch* Funk: 1990 is gonna be the year the Texas Outlaws take over the one horse town that is the World Wrestling Federation and it starts tonight when I leave our mark on that yellow bellied mongrol Jim Duggan. *Funk jabs the end of his branding iron as it cuts to Jim Duggan* Duggan: There's nothing like wringing in the New year in the greatest country on God's green earth and there's no better way to celebrate then in a WWF ring. Terry Funk you say you want to make a mark on me? All I got to say is, step right up and show me what you got (thrusts his 2x4 into the air) TOUGH GUY! *Cut to Big Bossman* Bossman: Now i'll admit I don't know much about how the law works over in Japan but I know dang good and well that Mr Saito and Mr Fuji have run afould of the rules here in the World Wrestling Federation long enough. Saito get ready boy cause tonight your in for some hard time! *The SNME intro plays to the theme of the name but Douglas Grama as the camera pans the sold out Pavillion before cutting to our commentary team for the evening Vince McMahon and Gorilla Monsoon who hype up the card for tonight as well as the upcoming Royal Rumble Pay Per View. They also say WWF President Jack Tunney will join us "live via satellite" with an announcement that will have "major ramifications throughout the new year" which we will hear after our first match. They then send us to Sean Mooney. *Mooney is wearing a three peice suit and standing in front of a SNME banner* Mooney: Thank you Vince, Gorilla. Joining me at this time are the self proclaimed "Worlds Strongest Man" Dino Bravo and the self styled Commandant of the Northern Invasion Frenchy Martin. (the duo walk into view. Martin is wearing a light blue set of army fatigues, a black beret, a monocle and is carrying the flag of Quebec. Bravo is in his usual light blue tights and a darker blue cape.* Gentlemen tonight will see a major test for Dino Bravo as he stops into the ring and goes one on one with Jimmy Snuka. Martin: (casts a disgusted look at Martin) A "major test" momsieur? Surely you jest, that island Savage has no place in the ring with an athlete the caliber of Dino Bravo, a man who has sold out the largest arenas throughout Canada . This match is beneath my client's dignity. Bravo: It certainly is Frenchy, yet I confess i'm glad it's happening because it will give me an excellent opportunity to show Tito Santana exactly what's in store for him. You have something that I want Tito, something that I deserve to hold and that's the WWF Intercontinental Championship. So I want you to pay very close attention to what I do to this barefoot heathen tonight because it's just a fraction of what's coming for you. *We send it back to commentary who hype Bravo's hunt for the IC title before t"The Boy from New York City" by Manhatten Transfer comes over the PA system signaling its time for our first match.* Howard Finkel: Ladies and gentlemen, this is our opening contest for Saturday Night's Main Event and is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by the Guiding Light of the World Wrestling Federation, Capt Lou Albano. Weighing 251 pounds, He is the Boy from New York City, Jimmy Valiant! *The duo groove their way to the ring slapping hands and taking the time to dance with a few kids. A few ladies can't resist giving Handsome Jimmy a peck on the cheek as he dances by. They get in the ring and try to get Howard Finkel to join in but the ring announcer politely declines. There's a party atmosphere in the Pavillion until a gong rings out followed by a suitably "middle eastern" theme picking up.* Finkel: And his opponent, from Tehran, Iran. Weighing 117 kilograms, the Iron Sheik! *Sheik marches to the ring, waving the Iranian flag in defiance of the boos that rain down on him. He enters the ring, marches up to Finkel and snatches the mic away from him.* Sheik: Now you listen to me Penn-sol-vahn-ia I no want to hear any USA USA chant while I make this Valiant Jimmy humble! *On cue, a massive a"USA" chant breaks out to the anger of the Sheik* The bell rings and while it's not a work rate classic by any measure it's still a match between two established vets who know what they're doing. Sheik has a gift for getting heat while Jimmy has a knack for getting a crowd behind him. Sheik eventually gets frustrated and grabs the Iranian flag and is lining up a shot when Albano gets on the apron and snatches it away from him. Sheik is yelling at him allowing Valiant to swing him into the ropes and knock him down with a back elbow before putting things away with the "Groovin elbow". It's party time in Villanovos! *Commercial break including a ad for the Royal Rumble airing live on Pay Per View January 19th from the World's Most Famous Arena Madison Square Garden! Call your cable provider for details on how you can watch this monumental event.* We return from break to see President Tunny sitting in his office. He informs the fans that due to the success of last years event, it's been decided that the King of the Ring shall return in 1990! Furthermore it's been determined that at that event -who's date and venue are still being determined- the reigning King of the Ring shall challenge for the WWF Championship regardless of whomever holds the title. Due to the significance of this decision, it has been determined that the current leading up to that event wrestlers who have been deemed worthy shall be permitted to challenge Haku for the crown, The first such challenge shall take place at the Royal Rumble when Haku defends his status as King of the Ring against a man who's seen repeated success against him, The Ultimate Warrior! *We return to commentary where they hype Tunney's announcement and speculate on what this means for the Heenan Family which currently controls both the King of the Ring and the WWF Championship. Their discussion continues until interrupted by a echoing call of...* "Super...Super...Superfly" Finkel: The following contest is a singles match and is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, form the Fiji Islands, weighing 235 pounds Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka! *The crowd cheers as Snuka claims the ropes and flashes the "I love you" sign. The good vibes vanish as "La Marseillalse" come over the pa system.* Finkel: His opponent. accompanied by "Le Commandant" Frenchy Martin and representing the Northern Invasion. From Montreal, Quebec, Canada, weighing 112 kilograms. He is the self proclaimed "World's Strongest Man" Dino Bravo! WWF Intercontinental Champion Tito Santana joins commentary to put over Bravo's chase of the IC title. He admits Bravo is a formidable contender but says he's a fighting champion who won't run from the Canadian strongman. The finish sees Snuka go for a crossbody but Bravo turns it into a Powerslam for the win. Bravo stares down Santana while making the "belt around waist" gesture. *Commercial break including a ad for the Royal Rumble airing live on Pay Per View January 19th from the World's Most Famous Arena Madison Square Garden! Call your cable provider for details on how you can watch this monumental event.* *"Mean" Gene Okerlund wearing his Saturday Night best is in the Heenan Family's private luxury locker room. Heenan is in a bedazzled tuxedo with the smuggest possible grin on his face. Rude is wearing a white robe with golden trim with the WWF Championship over his shoulder. Haku is his full royal regalia and is going through a series of martial arts poses.* Okerlund: Welcome back fans, "Mean" Gene Okerlund here with one half of tonight's main event. The WWF Champion "Ravishing" Rick Rude, the King of the Ring Haku and the man behind it all, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. Gentlemen it's the first big event of 1990 for the World Wrestling Federation and tonight may just be the biggest challenge for the Heenan Family to date. Tag team action against Andre the Giant and the Ultimate Warrior. Heenan: Biggest challenge? I guess if you're speaking literally you might be on to something because Lord knows Andre weighs as much as the entire population of the city of Philadelphia combined but if you're talking about the effort it's gonna take for YOUR WWF Champion Rick Rude and YOUR King Haku to dispose of these two ham n eggers then you could not be more wrong. I mean i've lost count of how many times Rick here has run circles around that beached whale you call Andre and as for Warrior? That painted freak should be in an asylum somewhere instead of being let out among the general public let alone in the ring with two world class athletes like you have right here. Okerlund: Well you certainly sound confident but i'm curious to what you think of President Tunney's announcement about the reigning King of the Ring challenging for the WWF Championship at this years event? Heenan: I think it's a wonderful idea actually. Okerlund: Oh really? Heenan: Yes really. Okerlund: I presume you expect Haku to still be King when the time comes? Heenan: Well of course. Okerlund: And of course you believe Rick Rude will still be WWF Champion at his time? Heenan: Naturally. Okerlund: And of course, being the Brain you've realized, that being the case it would result in Haku challenging Rick Rude for the WWF Championship. My question would then be, exactly who's corner are you in for that one? Heenan: (slight paniked look) Well you see...the thing about that is....I mean if it were to happen....(panic replaced by anger) now listen here humanoid, I see what you're trying to do and its not gonna work. You got to wake up pretty early in the late afternoon to outsmart Bobby Heenan. My men are professionals, you understand? And more importantly than that, we're a team. We are a unit, we are a FAMILY and my men know that as long as the WWF Championship stays in the Family then that's all that matters. Now get out of here will ya? We've got strategizing to do. *cut to Finkel in ring* Finkel: The following contest is a singles bout set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by "The Devious" Mr Fuji. From Tojyo, Japan, weighing 265 pounds...Mr Saito! *Saito demonstrates martial arts poses as Fuji waves the Japanese flag* "If you're ever down in Cobb County..." Finkel: And his opponent....from Cobb County, Georgia....weighing 330 pounds...the Big Boss Man! The two barreled chested men beat the tar out of each other with Saito match Boss' brawling while also adding a dash of more scientific grappling for flavor. Boos Man takes the momentum but as he looks to perhaps put things away, Slick and Zeus come down to ringside with the former shouting abuse the whole way. Boss Man prepares to defend himself but as he's got his focus on the intruders, a tall blond man in an orange prison jumpsuit jumps the rail and attacks Boss Man from behind! He pounds away as referee Mike Chioda calls for the bell signaling the disqualification. Slick orders Zeus into the ring and the and the blonde man work over the Boss Man together. Saito is on guard but Slick talks to Fuji who collects Saito and the Japanese duo walk away. The blonde man takes Bos Man's nightstick and scores several stiff shots as Zeus holds Boss Man's arms back. Finally security and a group of lower card faces hit the ring and Slick leads Zeus and the mystery blonde away. Who the heck is this guy? *Commercial break including a ad for the Royal Rumble airing live on Pay Per View January 19th from the World's Most Famous Arena Madison Square Garden! Call your cable provider for details on how you can watch this monumental event.* *Commentary are still in shock over the events that occurred before the break. We're told that Slick, Zeus and the mystery man have been escorted from the building while the Boss Man has been taken to the trainers room to be checked out.* *A video plays advertising Wrestlemania VI which will air live on Pay Per View from the Skydome in Totonto, Ontario, Canada!* "HOOOOOOOOOO" Finkel: The following contest is a singles match and is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first....from Glens Falls, New York...weighing 270 pounds "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan! *Duggan has the crowd pumped marching around and waving Old Glory. But the mood in the arena suddenly shifts when the ominous sounds Ennio Morricone's "Man with a Harmonica" come over the pa system.* Finkel: And his opponent, representing the Texas Outlaws...from the Double Cross Ranch outside Amarillo, Texas...weighing 247 pounds...Terry Funk! Neither man gives an inch leading to an heated bout that ends in controversy when Fernandez sneaks down and cracks Duggan in the back with his own 2x4 as Duggan is running the ropes. Duggan stumbles forward allowing Funk to scoop him into his unique variation of the Piledriver. *Commercial break including a ad for the Royal Rumble airing live on Pay Per View January 19th from the World's Most Famous Arena Madison Square Garden! Call your cable provider for details on how you can watch this monumental event.* Finkel: Ladies and gentlemen, this is your main event of the evening *pop* It is a tag team match scheduled for one fall. *A woman breathlessly says "Simply Ravishing" before "Smooth Operator" by Sade plays throughout the arena.* Finkel: Inroducing team number 1...they are accompanied by Bobby "The Brain" Heenan and are representing the Heenan Family....first from the Kingdom of Tonga,weighing 275 pounds, he is the King of the Ring, Haku! And his partner Robbinsdale, Minnesota, weighing 252 pounds, he is your World Wrestling Federation Champion., "Ravishing" Rick Rude! *Rude swaggers up to Finkel and swipes the mic away without sparing the announcer so much as a sideways glance* Rude: Cut the music. What'd I'd like to have right now is for all you fat, sweaty, beer bellied Pennsylvania Pit stains to keep the noise down while I take my robe off and show the ladies what a real man, and especially what a real champion looks like, hit the music. *"Smooth Operator" hits up again as the boos rain down but as soon as the robe is off it's drowned out by a distinctively feminine cry of appreciation. He poses with the title around his waist, ending by flicking whatever he has sprayed on at the camera* *No music is needed for the next man through the curtain can light up a crowd with his presence alone.* Finkel: And their opponents. first from Grenoble in the French Alps, standing 7 feet 4 inches tall, weighing 550 pounds, he is the *the Wonder of the World, Andre the Giant! *The massive man stops just at the end of the aisle way and looks at his opponents with a thoughtful expression before adopting a wry smile as he turns back to the entrance as loud, energetic music bursts through the arena.* Finkel: And his partner, from Parts Unknown, weighing 280 pounds, The Ultimate Warrior! *Warrior sprints down the aisle and dives in the ring. His frantix entrance sends Heenan and Rude diving to the floor. Haku however, stands his ground even as Andre joins his partner in the ring.* It quickly becomes clear that the Heenan Family strategy is based around keeping Andre out of the ring as much as possible. Utilizing frequent tags -and a healthy dose of rulebreaking- they wear down the Warrior to the frustration of Andre and the crowd alike. Finally however, the Warrior breaks through and makes the tag and Andre comes in and goes on a slow motion rampage. The crowd erupts when he scoops Rude up in a massive bodyslam followed by a 550 pound elbow drop. Earl Hebner starts to make the count but before he gets to three, the Powers of Pain rush in and jump on Andre. Hebner throws the match out as a 4-2 beat down begins. Thankfully the cavalry arrives in the form of Demolition. With this brawny backup the faces rally and drive the entire Family from the ring. Heenan orders a retreat leaving the faces standing tall as the show closes.

WWF signs Hillbilly Jim.

And we're back! Some smart booking on the elimination match (with a twist). Sugar gets revenge for the breakup of Sweet Dreams, Bullet lets his anger at Idol cost him dearly. Idol cheats Iceman out the door while Adias not only loses his job but he's stupid enough to take a swing a Mr T. Disalvo falls to the numbers game. His bad night continues as he gets waylaid by a debuting JW Storm. Jumbo makes quick work of Jim. The bad nech cost Orndorff against Hansen. Muraco doesn't get the title but perhaps he and Graham are more in sync? The World Tag title match doesn't end in the blow-up i was expecting. Thanks to a bit of help from Mr T, Hogan is able to overcome the Russian Nightmare to hold onto the World Title.

A nice recap establishes how things stand in Mid-South heading into the new year. With Kerry on top of the card, you've definitely got a great leading man.

Latin Desire look even better with the National Tag Titles. Huber puts up a fight but Debeers makes him pay for it. Burke causes Jammer to wipeout big time. Canek finally claims Blackblood's mask in route to victory. St Clair finally learns some respect for Colon's wrestling ability, to the ire of Thornton. Neidhart becomes TV champion in a meteoric rise. Cactus Jack is definitely someone Buzz can have "fun" with. David finally puts Larry away in a blood soaked cage match. I can see how the fans could use a breather after that.

WWF sends Ivan Koloff to WCW in exchange for Kevin Kelly. Also LowBlow is still listed as the booker of the WWF and the roster is still mostly as it was when he was in charge.

Happy New Year Rain. Edmonton. There's something strange about reading words like "dazzling" and "flashy" being used to describe Lance Storm. PCO returns to take the fight to Adams. Where can I buy a ticket for the Money Train? Iron & Steel show they haven't lost their edge. Austin looks to distance himself from Page. Cornette doubles his forces but but but their arrival gets upstaged by the reunion of THE Force as well as the debut of Sargent Slaughter. Well Ausin may be splitting but DDP rebounds by, presumably, buying Awesome from the Playboy Club. But as always, the Club regroups by bringing in The Suicide Blondes & Brian Lee. But they to get upstaged, this time by the return of Roddy Piper. Windham gets a major win to hopefully turn the Brigade's fortunes around. Looks like something's cooking between Douglas/Busick and Malenko/Gurerro. SinMin has big plans for his Ministry. Phoenix Rising derails the Can-Am Express. The Diamond Exchange is bringing the Heat. Steamboat closes the marathon night with a successful defense. Victoria. Tina shows she can keep Lee in line. Sarge's presence proves a boost to the Force. Hart throws the gauntlet down and swears to be champions by year's end. Would NOT have expected Eddie and Dean to fall in with SinMin. Austin continues to asset himself. Windham bests the other half of the Syndicate. Vancouver. The Can-Am's troubles in the New year continue. Sarge & co are officially at war with Camp Cornette. Two wins and a draw, not a bad night for the Terror Collective. Steamboat goes 2 for 2 in the 90s. Kelowna. The Thrillseekers spoil the Blondes first outing representing the Playboy Club. Scotty show them how it's done. The Heartbreakers take the lead in proving who's PCW's dominant trio. Severn gives Finlay a few more bruises. The Hexagon break even in title matches to close the loop.

Television. I'm sure Jim Herd giving JJ matchmaking abilities won't backfire in any way whatsoever. Though his first main event was admittedly a doozy. Love the idea of turning the gauntlet into a tournament. The Omni. Owen evens the score with Liger albeit with an asterisk. Garvin snaps and lays out Martel and Brother Love. OMG and Sullivan always were a good team. Brother Love recovers from the beating Ron gave him enough to save the US tag titles. Pillman, Zenk & Smith are proving to be quite the trio. The Roadies tend off the grizzled veterans. Hall shines in his debut. The Rockers capitalize of an injured Blanchard to capture the NWA World Tag Team Titles. Berserker got a little too out of control. A Flair/Muta misfire ends in disaster.

What is it about Al Madril that brings out every writer's comedian? I'm not complaining obviously but I do wonder how he became the game's designated funny man. In any event, Judge Mulligan wasn't buying his legal argument. Lancaster earns himself another shot at Powers. I hope Kendall doesn't do anything hasty. Nice way to introduce the Sandman to Florida. Humperdink prepares to send his Mercenaries back into the Danger Zone.

I was curious with what you were going to do for both the "Judo Jacket" match and the "Mixed Style Fights" and I like the direction you went with them. Adds another dash of personality to UWF cards.

BCW takes a major step forward by joining the USWA. Lock shows that no TV station pencil pusher is gonna tell her and her Tazmaniacs what to do.

A great recap explaining why everybody needs to be hyped for SuperClash!

UWF closing out 89 in style.

The Man of Means does know how to treat his men to a good time. Playboy Club taking it easy. I think Barry and Billy would've benefited from hearing Severn's speech.

Happy Holidays friends! Consider this a Christmas present to you all. Saturday Night's Main Event Full Card. January 4, 1990. William B. Finneran Pavilion in Villanova, Pennsylvania. Airing live on NBC. Main Event. "8th Wonder of the World" Andre the Giant & The Ultimate Warrior vs The Heenan Family (WWF Champion Rick Rude & King of the Ring Haku) w/Bobby "The Brain" Heenan "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan vs Terry Funk Big Bossman vs Mr Saito w/Mr Fuji Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka vs "World's Strongest Man" Dino Bravo w/"Le Commandant" Frenchy Martin "The Boy from New York City" Jimmy Valiant w/"The Guiding Light" Capt Lou Albano vs The Iron Sheik

The Southern Rockers & RPMs get the crowd fired up. Love Rasta finding ways to work his gimmick into his matches. Mando's interference backfires for his hermanos. As predicted, the numbers game was too much for Lancaster. Top Gun & his wingman show the mercenaries they aren't backing down. I know the segment was gonna be gold as soon as I read "Alberto Madril, attorney at law". He may not have gotten the match thrown out but he still came through for his client in the end. Grizz is officially the king of the beach. Thankfully for DJ her other clients hand onto the tag titles. Hate to say it but Humperdink was right. Putting Kendall in the Funk family match wasn't the best move on Mulligan's part.

Welcome back to the game.

R.I.P Eric Embry. The Steiners just knocked the New Breed back to the future. Golden wins the chance to ref the Southern tag title match. The Freebirds must be feeling pretty good right now. Jimmy Jack realizes too late that it might not be the best idea to piss off the world's strongest man. Dutch's dirty tricks finally pay off. Slater has an admirer it seems. Sarge's tour of duty comes to a close. Budro couldn't outrun the claw. Miss Tennessee costs Eddie again. Never let it be said Jimmy Hart won't take a few lumps for the First Family. It seems blood is truly thicker than water as Golden hands the Stud Stable the Southern tag titles. What an arrival for the Macho Man as he prevents the King of claiming the World title.

Not much to say about the TV but at least Sullivan loved his present. Now onto the big show. A fun opener shows off the bright stars WCW has on its roster. Brother Love gets his first taste of gold. Liger wins a instant classic over Owen. Garvin's TV title is saved by the bell. The Roadies score the win but a technicality sees the titles divided and WCW with three sets of tag team champions. Some quick thinking by the Stinger nets him a W. Muta douces the Wildfire. Ventura gives a glowing introduction to the Diamond Stud. Luger will be the man trusted to lead WCW into the future. Curious to see how the Horsemen regroup.

One thing that stands out to me going over the Wrestle Dynasty card is all the matches they could be having for a title but aren't. Both ZSJ and Shota are competing against Ricochet and Castignoli respectively- but there's no talk of the World title being on the line. Same with the Global title, Finlay will be taking on Brody King while Tsuji faces Jack Perry but no talk of either of them getting a shot. I get that Kenny v Kidd doesn't need a title to generate hype but Kidd is still the Strong Openweight champion. If nothing else they could bill it as the "biggest Strong Openweight championship match in history".

Royal & Starr step up to fight off the Cuban invasion. Jason makes a Sterling debut. Lock brings in a second Taz to double the chaos. Like the touch of connecting her to Sullivan.