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I am the man of the hour, the man with the power. I am the hit maker, the record breaker. I got the smiling grace and a lovely face. I 'll make your back crack, and your liver quiver. If you do not dig this mess, you are at the wrong address, and Superstar, while all the rest are in the back, laughing and joking, the dream is out front, cooking and smoking!

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  • 2 weeks later...

From WrestleMania VI - When the Fink announced that Dusty and Sapphire weighed in at a combined 450.

 

"You're telling me Rhodes only weighs 200? Because I damn well know that Sapphire weighs at least 2 and a half!" - Jesse Ventura

Jesse at his best. I actually prefer him and Monsoon over Monsoon and Heenan. Another good Jesse line:

 

Ventura: Now why would Warrior do that? Hogan eliminates the warrior, so he gets in the ring and nails the other two opponents? That don't make sense to me Schivone!

Shaivone: He's a wild man!

Ventura: He's an idiot!

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Perro Aguayo getting all sociological while doing commentary with Dr. Alfonso Morales for an El Talisman vs America Rocca match, talking about why lower income folks from certain areas end up in lucha libre and boxing, while "personas con dinero" ("people with money") like tennis or other things.

 

"Duele mas el hambre que los golpes." ("The hunger hurts more than the blows.")

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  • 2 weeks later...

"That's after NBA basketball on Sunday here on TBS on the Main Event, so if they're still shooting baskets, just stick around. The Hawks will get beat, whoever it is, and then you'll see Beautiful Bobby take the World TV Title from Arn Anderson." - Jim Cornette, Power Hour 2/2/90

 

"And I'm sure as Z-Man grew up in Minneapolis, watching the career of the Nature Boy skyrocket, he probably never thought he would have a chance to wrestle on national TV for all the gold."

"I never thought he would either, Jim!" - Ross and Cornette, same episode.

 

Cornette also uncorked a classic on Ross on I believe the 1990 premiere of PH (1/5). Ross let slip that Dr. Death had told him, "in confidence," that he intended to win a title in 1990. Cornette responded:

 

"So let me get this straight, Jim Ross. You and Dr. Death are close personal friends, and he told you something in confidence, and you're choosing to discuss it on the biggest superstation in the world, live on television in front of 50 million people? Boy, I hope I'm never your close personal friend, Jim! There's no telling when you might stooge me out to the IRS!"

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  • 2 weeks later...

Lawler at KOR 96:

 

While Lawler is walking down the aisle for his upcoming match with Warrior he starts insulting random fans.

 

Directed at a fat girl - " When you wear blue, do people try and put mail in you?"

 

Directed at some woman - "Good to see you off the streets tonight"

 

Directed at another woman - "Look at this face. It's faces like this which turn guys into people like Goldust"

 

He says some more as well. These are the only ones I can remember.

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Straight up laughing out loud moment in the opening of the MX/Pillman & Zenk match from Worldwide 2/17/90. Funk gives kudos to "these great youngsters, Pillman and Zeman," rhymes with semen. Cruise pointedly corrects him, and Funk pointedly does it again.

 

Versus the Freebirds the next week at the same taping: "It's Z-Man, not Zeman!" "Well, Crispy, I am ze man and you are not!" Love it.

 

Jim Cornette, Main Event 3/11/90: "Hello, you black lung filled coal miners, take a look at the greatest tag team in the world..."

 

A moment later Bob Caudle says broadcast partner Teddy Long reminds him of Cornette, which Teddy denies: "That can't possibly be true, because I'm neat in the waist and sweet in the face, and Jim Cornette is neither."

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  • 1 month later...

 

From WrestleMania VI - When the Fink announced that Dusty and Sapphire weighed in at a combined 450.

 

"You're telling me Rhodes only weighs 200? Because I damn well know that Sapphire weighs at least 2 and a half!" - Jesse Ventura

Jesse at his best. I actually prefer him and Monsoon over Monsoon and Heenan. Another good Jesse line:

 

Ventura: Now why would Warrior do that? Hogan eliminates the warrior, so he gets in the ring and nails the other two opponents? That don't make sense to me Schivone!

Shaivone: He's a wild man!

Ventura: He's an idiot!

 

 

SummerSlam '89 after Warrior used the belt.
Jesse: That's a disqualification!! Where in the hell is the referee?
Tony: That's outside of the ring Jesse.
Jesse: So what?
Tony: As much as it can just be a coun tout here.
Jesse: What are you going to tell me Schiavone? You can shoot somebody outside the ring, as long as it's outside the ring?
Royal Rumble '90 after Hogan slingshots Perfect into the post.
Jesse: He put him into the post! See what Perfect did to the post!
Tony: Actually, he was saved by the post that time, I think.
Jesse: Saved? How do you get saved hitting the post?
Tony: Well, if he hadn't hit the post, he would've gone over the top.
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TNT episode 10 (around the 1:27:30 mark if you want to watch it)

Vince, Lord Al and Salvatore Bellomo are cooking pizza dough. Alfred starts smelling the flour and gets it all over his nose.

 

Vince: "Alfred, you have powder all over your nose. That's probably not the first time I have seen that, I am not too sure."

 

What a different world it was back then.

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RAW 97/07/05

 

Vince : "Sex ?!! What does sex have to do with the WWF championship ??!!", in a really outraged voice.

 

If you wonder, Lawler just refered to the Canadian swimming olympic team that had in their contract that they couldn't have sex during the Games. Mind you, it was during a (good) Shawn Micheals vs Billy Gunn match, with Sunny at ringside. I thought Vince's reaction was really funny, as he often was back in those days.

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