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Dave Meltzer stuff


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Here's a scan of a column Dave wrote for the National circa 1990 about Madusa's success in Japan: https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B-NNkZSWAAYlQWJrQmY1ekV6b0U

 

It was in an envelope of stuff Kurt Browns sent me last year and I was going through that stuff now, so I scanned it. Wish more of these were around...

won't load for me

 

I think the permissions might've gotten screwed up so I'll check when I get home, but I'm pretty sure I have it set to public or at least "anyone with a link can see it." What happens when you click the link?
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Dave on fine form in today's news update:

 

--Mark Henry, Zack Ryder, Lilian Garcia and Natalya from WWE will be appearing tonight in Brooklyn at MCU Park (Cyclone Stadium) for the Cyclones game promoting Be a Star. I suppose they are going to tell all the kids there what to do if uncaring assholes in school call them names like horse face and Secretariat or tease them about farting in class among other things, or try to humiliate them so badly in trying to get them to no longer hang out with the cool guys.

That's not to mention all the embarrassing TV skits with Mark Henry when they were trying to get him to quit.

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Well, we all knew it was only a matter of time before they did a Rate the WWE Babes poll:

 

Who is the hottest of these WWE women?

A.J. 43.2%

Layla 22.0%

Kaitlyn 12.6%

Lilian Garcia 5.7%

Vickie Guerrero 5.2%

Alicia Fox 4.2%

Aksana 3.9%

Maxine 3.3%

 

Who is the hottest of these WWE women?

Eve Torres 33.2%

Kelly Kelly 23.7%

Rosa Mendes 12.7%

Beth Phoenix 11.2%

Natalya 11.0%

Naomi 3.8%

Cameron 2.7%

Tamina Snuka 1.7%

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Wow

 

40 years ago, in a long lost universe, the not-yet Superstar Billy Graham & Pat Patterson won the NWA World tag team championship, well, if the world consists of Fresno north to Ukiah, and mainly San Francisco every third Saturday night, beating Ray Stevens and not-quite yet Chief Peter Maivia at the Cow Palace when Graham pulled out Brass Knuckles and cracked Maivia in the jaw and pinned him.

 

As the story goes, Maivia suffered a broken jaw and during his period of recuperation, which likely consisted of him going to another territory, we were told that due to his broken jaw, Maivia’s only way to get nutrition was to sip soup through a straw while his jaw healed.

 

Vowing revenge for his friend, Stevens said he would put up his title against Graham, and vowed to break his arm, break his leg, and break his jaw, and when he was done, Graham would find out what it’s like to sip soup through a straw like his good friend was doing. Or he calmly told announcer Hank Renner, how about I break his leg and just end his career.

 

On 6/25, the idea of hearing somebody copy a pro wrestling interview for a feud between Stevens and Graham wouldn’t have been a surprise. After all, one of the participants in the press conference goes on Youtube and memorizes every Superstar Graham interview that hasn’t been destroyed by promoters who erased their tapes to save money.

 

But that the other guy would do Ray Stevens?

 

“When the time comes and the time is right, I’m going to break his face and break every one of his teeth in his mouth,” said Ed Soares, the modern version of Gary Hart, translating for Anderson Silva.

 

“I’m going to beat his ass like he’s never been beaten before. I’m going to make sure that every one of his teeth are broken, his arms are broken, his legs are broken. He’s going to not be able to walk out of the Octagon by himself, I can guarantee that. And I know that he’s listening so the game’s over. No more shit talking. It’s on now.”

 

Hey, don’t forget the line about sipping soup through a straw.

 

“He didn’t affect me personally, but I’m just going to make him pay and make him eat everything that he said, not only about myself, but about our country, about everything. I’m going to make him pay and make sure he never disrespects any Brazilian, any fighter, not only Brazilian, any fighter. I’m going to beat him maybe the way his parents should have beaten him to teach him some manners because he’s disrespectful. He’s a criminal and I’m going to beat him up like he’s never been beaten before. The game’s over. He can say whatever he wants, but I’m not playing anymore. He’s going to get beat like he’s never been beaten before.

 

“The first time we fought, he stepped out the loser and he’s going to step out losing again this time. The only difference is that this time he’s going to have to go see a plastic surgeon after the fight.”

 

Since 2010, there hasn’t been a UFC fight that has broken the 1 million buy mark. The jury is still out on UFC 148, but it is likely to be the company’s biggest show of the year, and almost guaranteed to be the biggest middleweight fight in MMA history.

 

Sonnen’s comment wasn’t channeling Graham, but instead, he was stealing from a catch phrase about three decades later.

 

“I’ve got two words for him. Medium rare.”

 

That was in reference to Sonnen’s comments about how he was going to beat Silva up, and then have Silva’s wife cook him a steak.

 

Two years ago, before the first fight, people were entertained by Sonnen, but few actually gave him much of a chance. Anderson Silva was the most talented fighter in the history of the sport. Sonnen was a man who had made a career out of coming close but not winning the big one. And it happened again.

 

Sonnen won every minute of every round until, with less than two minutes left, he got caught in a triangle. Silva had some kind of a rib injury and has maintained on that night he wasn’t himself. And even if Sonnen had survived and won the decision, it would have been overturned due to the steroid test issue.

 

Evidently people don’t believe in what they saw in the first fight since Silva comes in as an 11-4 favorite. The key to the fight is simple. Can Sonnen take Silva down and keep him there while doing damage in at least three of the five rounds, and avoid getting knocked out or submitted. If he can execute that game plan, he’ll end up as the next champion. If not, we may see either a quick knockout, or 25 minutes of deliberate systematic torture.

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Ok, I'm not up on other media that covers MMA/ UFC..but wouldn't most of them be embarrassed by articles comparing their sport to wrestling?

Yes. A quick joke or analogy is fine, but Meltzer.....well he's Meltzer. Still thinks they're both the same fucking thing.

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Well, we all knew it was only a matter of time before they did a Rate the WWE Babes poll:

I was amused by Dave's theory he posed on one of the radio shows the other day that the most popular women in US wrestling tend to be the one's who are just hot enough that you find them attractive but not so hot that you'd think you wouldn't have a chance to bang them.

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Well, we all knew it was only a matter of time before they did a Rate the WWE Babes poll:

I was amused by Dave's theory he posed on one of the radio shows the other day that the most popular women in US wrestling tend to be the one's who are just hot enough that you find them attractive but not so hot that you'd think you wouldn't have a chance to bang them.

 

 

I got what he was trying to get at, the stereotypical wrestling fan is going to tend to be somewhat resentful of the unbelievably hot chick since it will probably remind him of a chick who doesn't give him a chance IRL.

 

On the other hand, Trish Stratus.

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I thought Orndorff was really good in his WCW run with Paul Roma, fun team that was underrated at the time, but 80's Orndorff in the WWF didn't really impress me one way or the other. I started watching a in like 86 and I was very young, and mostly saw the syndy or NBC shows and don't remember a whole lot beyond initial impressions about it. He was an unconvincing babyface after he re-turned as far as I could tell. He reminds me of Lex Luger in a lot of ways, great body, sort of awkward movements in the ring, and a face that was born to be booed. A born heel.

 

The Hogan/Orndorff program was apparently modeled after Bruno/Larry Z, and Larry Z is another guy who after seeing him as a heel I can't believe he ever got over as a babyface. Him and Orndorff just come off as such dicks as heels

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Well, we all knew it was only a matter of time before they did a Rate the WWE Babes poll:

I was amused by Dave's theory he posed on one of the radio shows the other day that the most popular women in US wrestling tend to be the one's who are just hot enough that you find them attractive but not so hot that you'd think you wouldn't have a chance to bang them.

 

 

I got what he was trying to get at, the stereotypical wrestling fan is going to tend to be somewhat resentful of the unbelievably hot chick since it will probably remind him of a chick who doesn't give him a chance IRL.

 

On the other hand, Trish Stratus.

 

And on the other hand, Lita.
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Lita was plenty hot enough for the job, and she appealed to the goth/punk/emo niche that most of the supermodels didn't. A big problem with the hiring practices of these women (both Divas and Knockouts) is that the "hot" ones often tend to all look alike. They've got a very specific, very narrow idea of what beauty is; and what's worse, they assume that all the fans feel the same way.

 

I was puzzled at Dave specifically naming Daffney as a girl who was below-average in terms of hotness. She's pretty much my favorite ever.

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I've said for a while now that the only way for women's wrestling to draw in the US is by going the 80s AJW route and have them appeal primarily to young girls. Anyway, girls like AJ and Daffney are certainly attractive, but they're not stereotypical bombshells. Even the idols in joshi tend to be prettiest girl in school hot rather than supermodel hot.

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They've got a very specific, very narrow idea of what beauty is; and what's worse, they assume that all the fans feel the same way.

 

I was puzzled at Dave specifically naming Daffney as a girl who was below-average in terms of hotness. She's pretty much my favorite ever.

Agreed, I can't remember who, maybe one of the former WWE writers who's done a podcast actually mentioning Vince McMahn having a similar kind of "who'd find that hot???" reaction when someone brought up the idea of hiring Daffney once & not getting the idea that anyone would dig a girl like Shelly Martinez either when she was with the company.

 

Anyway, girls like AJ and Daffney are certainly attractive, but they're not stereotypical bombshells. Even the idols in joshi tend to be prettiest girl in school hot rather than supermodel hot.

True tho they're still being aimed a male audiance. The strong/tough girls are the ones that tended to draw the young women in Japan not the cute pretty ones.

 

Lita was unique in that part of her appeal was to young girls. They haven't used a female with the idea of drawing other females in a long time.

If WWE wanted to go that route Beth Phoenix would be a great choice but yeah, doesn't seem to be much of an interest in that from them.

 

I've actually heard that complaint before from a few female fans I knew that WWE doesn't do enough to cater to that part of the audiance. Not that women are a huge % of it but they're still missing out on a bit of opportunity thear.

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This headline is great "Former wrestler to be with Sonnen tomorrow" and here is the payoff

 

Josh Wilcox, who briefly wrestled for ECW and was also under a WWE contract about a decade ago, now hosts a radio show on ESPN 1080 in Portland from Noon to 3 p.m.

 

Chael Sonnen will be his guest at 2:15 p.m. Wilcox said that Sonnen was at his early pro wrestling matches in the old Portland territory.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Irelander with the amount of sports knowledge you could write on the back of a postage stamp here but even I gasped at Dave's reply to a thread asking who Wrestling's Joe Paterno was:

 

 

Paterno and Chris Benoit have nothing in common at all.

 

Paterno and Vince McMahon have a ton in common.

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