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Wrestling's most shameless, most glorious exaggerations


MoS

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I remember another Hogan one: his 21 minute standing ovation when he was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. I don't know how long it actually was, but considering this was not long after Michael Moore's widely publicized 20 minute standing ovation after the premier of Fahrenheit 9/11 at Cannes, the hyper-specific 21 minute claim seems very...Hogany.

 

I'm reminded of this after seeing this headline yesterday:

 

Hulk Hogan left 'violently shaking' when sex tape made public

 

Obviously, my initial thought is that Hogan is a guy who tends to violently shake a lot regardless. But my second thought is whether or not he's going to try to recreate - and then slightly exceed - Erin Andrews' reaction to her video, just because that seems to be how he operates a lot of the time.

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The attendance figure of 93,000 for WMIII. And how they keep saying they are going to break that record this year. Suposedly WMIII was closer to 78,000, but that wouldn't have been the all time attendance figure at the Silverdome.

 

The real number is closer to 93,000 than 78,000.
I know that this a longstanding debate, but you seem to say that with a lot of certainty so I'm curious to know if there's any evidence that I missed that proves this.
For my statement to be true, the actual attendance would have to be 85,501 or higher. The Lions got 80-81k for football. There's easily 5000 on the floor, thus my very confident statement.
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Ron Starr just cracked me up in a promo from 1985 Atlantic Grand Prix "smartening the people up" about how their used to be a King of Wrestling named Jerry Lawler but he put him out of wrestling with a piledriver and that's how he became the new King.

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I'm pretty sure Black Bart said Hollywood came calling after the Desperados skits.

Here's my full mini-review of Bart's shoot I wrote up a few years ago:

 

Black Bart's shoot is awesome for sheer BS level:

 

He claims Dusty Rhodes came up with the Undertaker gimmick, and that Black Bart was supposed to play that character.

 

He also claims he's the biggest locker room legend in today's WWE (for his antics back in the day)

 

Piper had a warrant for his arrest, so Bart pulled a car up to the ring w/ Piper in the trunk, popped it, Piper wrestled, and then hopped back in the trunk and they took off.

 

Oh God, Black Bart actually just claimed he was offered 180 grand to star in a Fox Network sitcom based on his, Dutch and Moondog Rex "Desperodos" gimmick. Flair told The TBS execs "We can't have these jabronis star in a show" So WCW released them and the Sitcom was canceled.

 

Ronnie Garvin would get sexually excited when you worked "stiff" with him.

 

He actually called himself vs Sam Houston a "Main event" match. Of course the place was sold out, and of course they had such a great match, the other 4 "Main Events" of the evening couldn't compare.

 

Vince McMahon wanted to bring him in and work the upper midcard and offered him a "job for life", Bart declined, so when he went to WWF a year or 2 later, Vince made him a jobber out of spite.

 

A week after Mike Von Erich got out of the hospital, Bart carried him in a match for 45 minutes, then asked the ref "Is this the boy who just got out of the hospital?" After the ref said yes, Bart said "Oh **** " and took Mike down and pinned him.

 

When David Von Erich died he laid in his hotel room for 2 weeks with the A/C shut off and stayed there til Fritz came to Japan 2 weeks later and snagged the body.

 

He claimed to have threatened Jose Gonzalez (Brody's killer) with a knife shortly after Brody's death.

 

Bart said in 1991 the ring crew was all 18 or 19 year old ***** men, and Vince had a tour bus for them, and would spend an odd amount of time on the bus with the gays.

 

He also says Lanny Poffo was gay, and came on to him. Vince found out Bart told Lanny off, and Bart was released shortly there after...

 

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Greg Gagne made up a number of fibs in his shoot too involving starting riots in Japan when he was a rookie, being barred from working for GCW for upstaging the regular talent, and various other later AWA fibs.

 

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Matt Bourne claimed Doink was going to headline WM 9 with Hogan but Hulk shot him down.

 

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And as far as wrestling announcers go, we had the Nikita Koloff lost out at gold medals in both wrestling and weightlifting when Russia boycotted the 84 Olympics.

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Piper had a warrant for his arrest, so Bart pulled a car up to the ring w/ Piper in the trunk, popped it, Piper wrestled, and then hopped back in the trunk and they took off.

 

Ronnie Garvin would get sexually excited when you worked "stiff" with him.

I kinda believe those two. Piper's goofy enough to do something like that, and Jake Roberts once mentioned that Garvin's nipples would get hard when he was beating you up.
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haku being one of the toughest wrestlers ever

I know people who know people that say this guy couldnt fight his way out of a wet paper cup, and that after a wild night out in Vegas with the WCW crew Alex Wright suplexed him through a margarine sculpture

 

Please, please tell more.

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haku being one of the toughest wrestlers ever

I know people who know people that say this guy couldnt fight his way out of a wet paper cup, and that after a wild night out in Vegas with the WCW crew Alex Wright suplexed him through a margarine sculpture

 

Please, please tell more.

 

 

Please, don't encourage him!

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haku being one of the toughest wrestlers ever

I know people who know people that say this guy couldnt fight his way out of a wet paper cup, and that after a wild night out in Vegas with the WCW crew Alex Wright suplexed him through a margarine sculpture

 

Please, please tell more.

 

 

Please, don't encourage him!

 

 

Hey, he could have weakened Haku before using his not-so-secret weapon of terrible dancing.

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Not that I am actually suggesting Alex Wright could take care of Haku or anything like that but it's not totally unheard of for a guy with less of street cred but with an understated wealth of wrestling knowledge to get one over on a tough blowhard. Erik Watts/Rick Rude comes to mind here.

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Hogan also partied with Jon Belushi after Wrestlemania II (you know, 4 years after Belushi's death).

 

The Hogan/Metallica stuff is so embarrassing as he claimed he auditioned for them in 1981 (you know, so he would have been auditioning right when Hetfield and Lars met) and would have quit wrestling in a second if he would have got the gig. Every single word of his stories are so pathetic that it comes off like my pathological liar co-worker who claims he downed 45 cocktails in an evening while gambling in Vegas (and of course taking the casino for all they had).

 

On Jericho's podcast he said it was after Cliff Burton died.... in the middle of Hulkamania.

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Hogan also partied with Jon Belushi after Wrestlemania II (you know, 4 years after Belushi's death).

 

The Hogan/Metallica stuff is so embarrassing as he claimed he auditioned for them in 1981 (you know, so he would have been auditioning right when Hetfield and Lars met) and would have quit wrestling in a second if he would have got the gig. Every single word of his stories are so pathetic that it comes off like my pathological liar co-worker who claims he downed 45 cocktails in an evening while gambling in Vegas (and of course taking the casino for all they had).

 

On Jericho's podcast he said it was after Cliff Burton died.... in the middle of Hulkamania.

 

 

His story keeps evolving as he originally said he was "best pals" with Lars during the "early days" of Metallica. "Early days" can be taken any way, from the inception of the band right on up to Burton's death where he now says he auditioned. I love the thought of Hogan really digging Ride the Lightning and Master of Puppets enough to quit the biz, but.....

 

It's probably more believable than him also trying to play bass in the Stones at the same time. Would've been news to Bill Wyman.

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I have never seen a shoot interview with an old school wrestler (meaning guys that worked before, say Wrestlemania 1 or the initial Starrcade) that didn't have a story about a riot that magically didn't make tape.

But there is at least 1 riot that DID make tape:

 

 

The "we sold out x nights in a row" story is also a popular one (where x > 50).

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