If Wrestlers Were Cheeses, What Cheeses Would They Be (Really)

[elliott]

So I've worked with cheese in various forms (buying, selling, making) for about 15 years now and know way more about cheese than any sane person should ever know about cheese. Since I'm on this forum and have as many posts as I do, obviously the same can be said about wrestling. I also like to make weird oddball comparisons between things that don't make sense at all. "This chocolate reminds me of Christmas. That Dog looks like a Lamp." Etc. (I get it, I'm crazy. But this is gonna be cool, I swear).

 

So the obvious thing to do was create the If Wrestlers were Cheeses What Cheeses Would They Be Thread. You might have clicked on this thinking "haha, cool, Ric Flair is cheddar and Hulk Hogan is American Singles." This isn't that thread. This is something else entirely. This is me walking through the Greatest Wrestler Ever Top 100 and telling you which cheese best represents each wrestler and why.

 

I'm doing this for a few reasons. Mostly, because I'm personally finding it super entertaining and fun to put together. But also because I hope yall read it, and find it enjoyable and informative and most importantly that it encourages you to try some new weird cheeses or just say "Hey, TIto Santana is totally Cheese X and now I'm thinking about TIto Santana lets go watch some Tito Santana." Or whatever. Anyway. I hope this is as fun to read through as it was putting it together.

 

I wanted to include pictures of the cheeses in the thread itself, but I can't figure out how. So I'll just include the links to the google image page. I encourage clicking on them and taking a look because the visuals are crucial to some comparisons.

 

I'm gonna go 10 at a time. Starting with 100-91.

 

 

100) Daisuke Ikeda - Lingot –

https://www.google.com/search?q=Lingot+Cheese&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwirxqbfiKrbAhVaGDQIHewtAgoQ_AUICygC&biw=857&bih=546

 

I picked Lingot for Daisuke Ikeda due to the fact that Lingot is a funky tasting ash-ripened Raw Goat’s Milk Cheese that will kick you right in the face. “Shoot Style Wrestlers” which Ikeda is often described as, are considered acquired tastes that aren’t for everyone, but the folks who love them, love them. An aggressively flavored goat cheese like Lingot is certainly an acquired tasted. Lingot is a small formatted cheese typically around 5oz in weight. Lingot is a better cheese than Ikeda is a wrestler.

 

99) Virus - Chabichou du Poitou –

https://www.google.com/search?q=chabichou+du+poitou+cheese&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjM4vOViarbAhWlIjQIHcO8BgIQ_AUICigB&biw=857&bih=546

 

Former mini’s star Virus is represented by Chabichou du Poitou. This fantastic Raw Goat’s Milk Cheese comes in the shape of a “bonde” or a truncated cylinder and is roughly 6 cm in height. Like Lucha, many people are turned off by Goat Cheeses, but they are simply the unfortunate folks unable to enjoy some of the best cheeses in the world. Many famous/highly regarded cheeses are certified based geography, milk types or even process. In France this certification, (which is the same for wines), is known as appellation d'origine contrôlée (AOC for short). I included this here because Chabichou du Poitou received AOC certification in 1990 and is representative in this comparison to the fact that Virus was once a mini who became a certified heavyweight. Chabichou du Poitou is a better cheese than Virus is wrestler.

 

 

98) Kerry Von Erich – Valencay –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=YtUMW5DhFMGT0PEP_PKXOA&q=valencay+cheese&oq=valencay+cheese&gs_l=img.3.0.0j0i24k1l2.29308.31510.0.32453.15.13.0.2.2.0.132.1094.10j3.13.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.15.1132...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.XIbo4sjvCJk

 

Valencay is an ash-ripened, raw goat cheese from the Loire Valley in France. “Ash Ripened” means literally what you think it does. It is covered in wood ash (there is a version coated in vegetable ash also). It is also a personal favorite and I like Kerry Von Erich more than most. Flavor wise, this cheese is goaty and a little funky. I could say I picked it to represent Kerry because I personally like it and because it’s flaky texture would be a good comparison to Kerry’s flaky nature. Or that he was the big time wrestler in the 80s most likely to wake up covered in wood ash. But the reason I picked Valencay for Kerry Von Erich is because of the legendary story surrounding it’s flat top structure. Valencay used to be made in a perfect pyramid shape with a pointed top. But when Napoleon returned to France after an unsuccessful expedition in Egypt, he was infuriated at the sight of the pyramid shaped cheese and cut the tops off with his sword. It has been made with a flattened top ever since. I can’t think of a better comparison for a one footed wrestler than a decapitated cheese.

 

 

97) The Destroyer - Ossau Iraty –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=g9UMW-DfIvuT0PEP8d-QiAM&q=ossau+iraty+cheese&oq=ossau+i&gs_l=img.3.1.0j0i67k1j0i30k1l8.19707.20789.0.22515.7.7.0.0.0.0.149.606.6j1.7.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.7.602...0i5i30k1.0.HzSqu4hchBg

 

The oldest wrestler in the top 100 is represented by Ossau Iraty, a pasteurized French sheep’s milk cheese made in the Pyrenees. It has a nutty and sweet flavor to it which makes it very approachable even if “sheep’s milk” can be a scary idea to some, much like “old school mat wrestling.” The reason I picked Ossau Iraty to represent The Destroyer, our oldest wrestler in the top 100, is because Ossau Iraty is one of the oldest European Cheeses, dating back over 5000 years. So much of the appeal of Ossau Iraty is the legend and myths. Some say it is the first cheese ever made. Others believe it was first created by Aristee, the son of the Greek God Apollo, with some producers being pointed to as using the descendents of the very sheep Aristee used. Regardless of the awesome myths and legends, Ossau Iraty is a wonderful cheese. However, The Destroyer is a better wrestler than Ossau Iraty is a cheese.

 

 

96) L.A. Park – Challerhocker –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=mtUMW6TlNajA0PEPm_KQ6A8&q=challerhocker+cheese&oq=challerho&gs_l=img.3.2.0l3j0i24k1l3j0i10i24k1j0i24k1.30096.33448.0.35303.9.9.0.0.0.0.127.737.7j2.9.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.9.733...0i67k1j0i10i67k1j0i10k1.0.dYjwNebSg14

 

The wrestler who often looks like he’s come straight out of a horror movie (Skeleton Man Covered in Blood) is represented by the cheese you would cast as the star of a horror movie. Challerhocker (prounounced Holler Hocker), is a Swiss Alpine Style cheese made by one of the finest cheesemakers in the world. Like a true Alpine Style cheese, it has a boldy nutty flavor with a slighty sweet finish. But this is truly one of the best cheeses of its style in the world. I picked it to represent LA Park because Challerhocker literally translates to “Cellar Dweller” and the design work is truly creepy, just like a bloody LA Park. Challerhocker is a better cheese than LA Park is a wrestler.

 

 

95) Sangre Chicana – Casu Marzu –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=v9UMW6KFDba50PEPoqG9iAo&q=casu+marzu+cheese&oq=casu+marzu+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0l2j0i8i30k1l2j0i24k1l2.24448.28096.0.28367.17.14.0.3.3.0.133.1112.12j2.14.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.17.1183...0i67k1j0i30k1.0.M_LLNMcRFcc

 

For Sangre Chicana, I picked the Casu Marzu, the legendary Sardinian Sheep’s Milk Maggot Cheese. This cheese has been made for 1000s of years and is considered unsafe to eat if the maggots inside have died. Yes, this cheese is made and eaten with live maggots. This is the only cheese on the list I have never tried because it is illegal in the United States. That illegality is one of the reasons I picked it to represent Sangre Chicana who has had his fair share of run ins with the law over the course of his wrestling career/life. Another reason I picked it for Chicana is because I have never tried it, but I would jump at the opportunity, much like Chicana’s early 80s run. If all the wrestling in history became available to watch, I’d watch that late 70s-early 80s Chicana run first and foremost. If I could try any cheese ever made, this would be the first one. Also, if any wrestler was covered in live maggots, it’d be Sangre Chicana. I don’t know if Sangre Chicana is a better wrestler than Casu Marzu is cheese. I suspect he probably is honestly.

 

 

94) Shinsuke Nakamura - Herve Mons Bethmale –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=3NUMW-6BIuXD0PEPlqCr6Ac&q=herve+mons+bethmale&oq=Herve+Mons+Be&gs_l=img.3.0.0i24k1.22419.25214.0.27198.13.12.0.1.1.0.134.1113.7j5.12.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.13.1131...0j0i67k1j0i30k1.0.gDWhpcZx3RI

 

First, Herve Mons is one of the world’s best affineurs (Cheese Agers). He travels around to small farms in France and finds amazing cheeses and ages them in his caves, perfecting them with his master craftsmanship. He is one of the most highly regarded figures in the world of cheese. His Bethmale cheese is an aged, semi-firm cow’s milk cheese from the Pyreenes. It is said to have a creamy and slightly mushroomy flavor. I picked Bethmale to represent Shinsuke Nakamura for a personal reason. The last wheel of Bethmale I had, I was super excited to get it, crack into it and try it. And when I did, I was left with this super boring, borderline flavorless cheese. It was cold when I first tried it, so I waited an hour or so for it to warm up to room temperature to try it again and it remained a complete disappointment. This has mostly been my experience with Shinsuke Nakamura. I liked that one match with Kazushi Sakuraba, but that’s really about it. So that match is the creamy texture of Bethmale surrounded by a sea of disappointment. Bethmale is probably still a better cheese than Shinsuke Nakamura.

 

 

93) Bob Backlund - Saint Agur –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=-NUMW8q7KJHv9APdjIOQBA&q=saint+agur+cheese&oq=saint+agur&gs_l=img.3.1.0l10.23932.25721.0.26923.12.11.1.0.0.0.156.914.10j1.11.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.12.934...0i67k1j0i10k1.0.RPIn6wBjEdk

 

Bob Backlund was a somewhat difficult pick for a cheese. Some see him as a top 100 all time worker, while others think he sucked and was just a product of the WWWF machine. He also worked a style (old school us mat work) that many don’t find appealing. But he has a lot of great matches on film in front of a variety of different folks often in front of insanely hot crowds. Thinking about all of this led me to go with Saint Agur, a French Blue cheese known for its extremely creamy and almost silky smooth texture. The creamy texture plays a central role in this cheese-wrestler connection because Bob Backlund was definitely a creamy white meat babyface. Blue cheeses also have a very specific and unique taste that many people will never be able to appreciate, much like Backlund’s style of work. However, the people that do enjoy it, swear by it and do all they can to try and convert the non-believers. St. Agur is often referred to as “blue for beginners” because, while having a strong & complex flavor, it isn’t as intense as many other blue cheeses and it’s creamy texture make it much more approachable. Similar in a way to how the super hot WWWF crowds and Backlund’s unique strength spots may help introduce people to old school mat wrestling and make it all seem more palatable. This wrestler and cheese are of equal quality in my mind. I would call it a toss up as to which is better.

 

 

92) Dusty Rhodes – Mt Tam Cowgirl Creamery –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=FNYMW6aVG-Ti9AOgppuIAg&q=mt+tam+cowgirl+creamery&oq=Mt+Tam+co&gs_l=img.3.0.0j0i24k1l5.22437.23804.0.25384.9.9.0.0.0.0.125.767.8j1.9.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.9.764...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.Jbsdlr1C2kE

 

So Mt Tam is a delicious triple cream organic brie made by Cowgirl Creamery. It is extremely rich and buttery in flavor and is just a total crowd pleaser. I picked Mt Tam to represent Dusty Rhodes because it has a higher fat content than butter. Just like Dusty Rhodes. Mt Tam is a better cheese than Dusty Rhodes is a wrestler but Dusty Rhodes is a better promo than Mt Tam is a cheese.

 

 

91) Too Cold Scorpio - Leonora –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=LtYMW5H8KKiv0PEPofm20AE&q=Leonora+Cheese&oq=Leonora+Cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l4.17764.20200.0.20465.14.12.0.2.2.0.128.988.11j1.12.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.14.1030...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.RBjMNhXjQ1c

 

Scorpio was one I struggled with to find a comparison. I landed on Leonora, a young bloomy rind goat cheese from Northern Spain for a couple of reasons. One is that Leonora and Too Cold Scorpio are two of my favorite cheese and wrestler names ever. “Leonora” is just beautiful and “Too Cold Scorpio” is super creative and badass. I also thought the light, flaky texture and almost lemony tang reminds me of a springy high flyer. Maybe. Also, and most importantly, this cheese and this wrestler are super underrated and often forgotten about in comparison to their peers. A great log of Leonora is spectacular, just like the best Scorpio matches. You’ve just got to be dedicated and take the time to find it. Leonora is a better cheese than Too Cold Scorpio is a wrestler, but it is close.

[gordi]

Hulk Hogan **is** American Singles, though.

 

Bright Orange in hue...

 

Popular to the point of being ubiquitous...

 

Hated by the snobs... but actually more enjoyable, versatile, and satisfying than they generally get credit for...

 

Very well suited to certain particular purposes... Highly profitable... A Good source of phosphorus...

 

But, if you think that is as good as it (wrestling/cheese) gets, you are sadly mistaken and there is a whole world of better options out there for you to discover.

 

 

I am really looking forward to the rest of this.

 

 

 

[elliott]

Oh, Hogan totally is. I already have that written up.

[Grimmas]

Greatest thread ever?

[Cap]

Fantastic.

 

I dont know nearly enough about cheese, but I'm learning a lot.

[Loss]

Peak Internet right here.

[Matt D]

I want to make the cheap Bella joke first.

[Jimmy Redman]

I want to make the cheap Bella joke first.

The receipts show that I made it in 2008. It wasn't pretty.

 

I am LIVING for this thread.

[HeadCheese]

Waiting for those New Jack and Colby Jack comparisons.

[elliott]

Hey, I'm glad yall are digging this! I'll put up 90-81 later tonight. I've got the top 100 all written up already. I plan on rolling out 10 per day.

[Shrike02]

Outstanding. I have Swiss relatives, I've been to Switzerland, and I've had #96. It's great. I love cheese and I love wrestling, this thread is for me.

[Cap]

Im not going to lie. Ive been thinking all day about the fact that you said a cheese was better than Park was a wrestlers and I've already looked up ordering it. Thats HIGH PRAISE

[elliott]

Outstanding. I have Swiss relatives, I've been to Switzerland, and I've had #96. It's great. I love cheese and I love wrestling, this thread is for me.

 

Im not going to lie. Ive been thinking all day about the fact that you said a cheese was better than Park was a wrestlers and I've already looked up ordering it. Thats HIGH PRAISE

 

Awesome!!! Its all worth it then already!

 

A little bit more info on Challerhocker.

 

The cheese maker, Walter Raas,is I think a 3rd (maybe 2nd) generation Appenzeller maker. Appenzeller is another Swiss Alpine style cheese known for being rich, nutty, spicy and fantastic to cook with. It has been made for around 700 years. Every wheel comes with a certificate of authenticity guaranteeing it is made with milk from the Appenzell region in NE Switzerland (production date & number are also included so you can verify exactly when it was made even). So, our guy Walt was named Best Appenzeller Maker like 15 out of 20 years. He's the Bill Russell of Appenzeller. Well, since he was born into it, he wanted to make his own thing too. So he developed this cheese Challerhocker. Now, before all of the original Appenzeller milk is divided up among the cheese makers, Walter gets the first crack at it and pays a little extra for the best of the best quality milk. He then uses this milk to make Challerhocker. It is small, hand made production so about one wheel is created per day and then aged for a year. It is washed with a brine and spices. The milk is actually thermalized, which I didn't bring up in the rundown. Thermalized is basically a slower form of pasteurization where the milk is heated to a lower temperature over a longer period of time. It kills all the bad bacteria but allows the good stuff to thrive.

 

So all of this is part of what makes it a better cheese than La Parka is wrestler. But also kind of why La Parka is the perfect comparison aside from all the crazy imagery (and hearing the sounds "Holler Hocker" is just disconcerting). I picked a lot of washed rind and blue cheeses for luchadores because lots of people struggle with LUcha and some will just never get it. This is very much the reality with washed rind cheeses. Even if the flavor is mild, they're going to have a pungent aroma. That's just the deal. Because Challerhocker is an aged washed rind cheese made in the style of an appenzeller, you're getting a much more approachable experience. It is definitely funky smelling for sure. But once you actually try it, I can't imagine anyone not liking it. This is kind of the La Park experience. He has the WCW connection that made a generation of US fans a fan of La Parka or at least have memories of him. Plus his charisma and taunts are so easy to draw people in. He's a funny dude. Comedy translates no matter what. Also, Park is one of the great Lucha brawlers and lucha brawls are way more translatable than trios or title matches.

 

So yeah. If words like "washed rind, smelly, 1 year old milk, cellar aged" are a bit of a turn off like "Lucha Libre" I'd totally recommend Challerhocker or LA Park.

[elliott]

90) Ron Garvin - Roncal –

https://www.google.com/search?q=Roncal+Cheese&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwigxdvZv6zbAhXB5lQKHXJ9CtQQ_AUICygC&biw=857&bih=546

 

For Ron Garvin, I landed on “Roncal” and I honestly didn’t make the Ron-Ron connection until I typed this sentence, so that makes the connection even stronger. Additionally, it is also the same color as Ron Garvin's hair. So BOOM. Roncal is an aged Spanish raw sheep’s milk cheese. Like Ron Garvin, this cheese has a very hard rind and packs a punch. I’ve described wheels in the past as “Salt Bombs” and Ron Garvin was definitely a salty motherfucker. While the phrase “Salt Bomb” is almost certainly a turn off, don’t fret, this has a super complex rich buttery flavor that can be spicy, sweet and herbaceous. Roncal is also a Protected Designation of Origin (PDO) cheese which helps insure it’s consistent excellence. “Consistent Excellence, Hard Rind, Packs a Punch, Herbaceous” are all phrases you’d use to describe Ron Garvin. Ron Garvin as a wrestler is similar in quality to Roncal as a cheese.

 

 

89) Atsushi Onita - Mimolette –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=_RoOW_7tM6ed0gKi3rvgDg&q=mimolette+cheese&oq=Mimo&gs_l=img.3.0.0i67k1j0l9.51893.52368.0.53562.4.4.0.0.0.0.133.375.3j1.4.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.4.373....0.XHhN5R__exg

 

Atsushi Onita is a personal favorite and so I picked one of my favorite cheeses, Mimolette. Mimolette, also a personal favorie of former French President Charles de Gaulle, is essentially France’s response to a Gouda. In the 1700s, Holland and France were at War and France outlawed Gouda, which is made in Holland. But you can’t just take a cheese away from the French people, so the top French cheese makers were tasked with creating a replacement and thus Mimolette was born. A cheese born out of a war sounds like a death match worker to me. This cheese is famous for many reasons including the ones mentioned above. It is well known for its bright orange appearance and cantaloupe like rind which makes for one of the most visually striking cheeses on Earth. Onita throughout his career is responsible for some of the most awe-inspiring and memorable visuals in wrestling history. Mimolette is often referred to as a cannonball due to its shape and extremely hard texture, and Atsushi Onita is definitely a hard rinded wrestler who would probably be the most likely wrestler to be willing to be shot with a cannonball. Mimolette is also a rare cheese where mites are purposefully introduced to the cheese which help form the distinctive rind and flavor. Don’t worry, unlike the Sardinian Maggot Cheese Casu Marzu, the mites of Mimolette don’t get down into the cheese so you don’t actually eat them. Like Sangre Chicana & Casu Marzu, someone like Atsushi Onita strikes me as a person who could possibly have mites or something living in/on him. Mimolette is a better Cheese than Atsushi Onita is wrestler.

 

 

88) Sami Zayn - Red Hawk –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=NBsOW-aNEJH90wKY7ZWgCg&q=red+hawk+cheese&oq=red+hawk+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l5.14008.16448.0.16592.15.13.0.2.2.0.185.1154.11j2.13.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.15.1198...0i67k1j0i10i67k1j0i8i30k1.0.UGzZGgjkFi4

 

I struggled for a bit on Sami Zayn because I don’t follow the modern product. Then I realized, oh yeah, Red Hawk. He’s a red headed high flyer. Sure, lets go with that. Red Hawk is a washed rind triple cream cheese from Cow Girl Creamery with a rich, buttery savory flavor accompanied by an aggressive aroma. It is given the name Red Hawk because of the bright orange rind given by the brine washing. Appropriate for this comparison, Red Hawk is a small format cheese usually between 8 & 12 oz in size. Red Hawk is a way way way better cheese than Sami Zayn is wrestler based on what I’ve seen of Zayn. Which admittedly isn’t much.

 

 

87) Cesaro Tête de Moine –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=RRsOW6DTMaWa0gLwkpqQDQ&q=tete+de+moine+cheese&oq=tete+de+m&gs_l=img.3.0.0i67k1j0l9.66039.68651.0.69806.13.9.2.2.2.0.144.782.8j1.9.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.13.881...0i10k1j0i8i30k1j0i30k1j0i10i24k1.0.gQ8K20MWu7U

 

Even without following the modern product as much, this was an extremely easy pick. Tête de Moine, or “Monk’s Head” is named because 13^h Century Swiss Monks of Jura had a great sense of humor. They were masters of making small cylinder shaped wheels of cheese and decided to invent a device called a girolle which would shave away thin layers of the cheese exposing a “bald spot” similar to a traditional monk’s haircut. Swiss, bald spot, Cesaro. The cheese itself is amazing. It has a rich creamy texture and pungent aroma that is accompanied by an intensely fruity flavor. Cesaro is a great wrestler but Tête de Moine is an even better cheese.

 

 

86) Hiroshi Tanahashi - Bay Blue –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=jBsOW_HZGurU0gKa-ZyoCg&q=point+reyes+bay+blue+cheese&oq=Point+Reyes+Bay+Blue&gs_l=img.3.1.0j0i24k1.50978.56562.0.58653.28.18.4.6.6.0.125.1627.14j4.18.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.28.1906...0i67k1j0i8i30k1.0.rFV5zbzn9hE

 

Again my struggles with modern wrestling made Tanahashi a difficult comparison to make. Even more difficult that I personally haven’t really enjoyed the matches of his that I have seen. However. A ton of people obviously regard him as not only one of the best wrestlers of the modern era, but one of the 86 best guys ever. Since he is a modern wrestler who is polarizing, I went with a new cheese that is extremely highly regarded by many, but others don’t like because it is made in the polarizing blue cheese style. Bay Blue comes from Point Reyes Farmstead and was first created in 2013. I was lucky enough to receive one of the first 100 wheels ever made and it was amazing. Sweet, earthy and tangy, this is a marvelous cheese. Hard to get your hands on, but excellent. My opinion of Bay Blue is more in line with the average NJPW Fan’s opinion of Tanahashi than my own opinion of him as a wrestler.

 

 

85) Manami Toyota - Point Reyes Blue –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=yBsOW5f-Aaeu0gKk4pvwCg&q=point+reyes+original+blue&oq=point+reyes+ori&gs_l=img.3.0.0j0i24k1.24392.26078.0.27338.15.11.0.3.3.0.136.939.10j1.11.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.14.1006...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.MkL_beWHAZs

 

To follow up with Tanahashi and Bay Blue, I picked the Point Reyes Original Blue to represent Manami Toyota. It was easy to pick a blue cheese for a super polarizing wrestler like Toyota, and once I remembered Dylan once called Tanahashi the modern day Toyota (I think this happened on a podcast, maybe not), this became an easy pick. Point Reyes Blue is an awesome cheese. It is crumbly and breaks apart easily, much like Toyota when getting stretched out by Ozaki or Kong or Hotta, but it is strong flavored and will still stand out when paired with other foods whether you like it or not. Point Reyes Original Blue is a better cheese than Manami Toyota is wrestler, even based on reputation.

 

 

84) The Undertaker - L’Ulivo –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=-xsOW4DDLIiF0wKdjoHgCQ&q=L%27Ulivo+cheese+jar&oq=L%27Ulivo+cheese+jar&gs_l=img.3...8473.8867.0.9065.4.4.0.0.0.0.115.340.3j1.4.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.0.0....0.QFLrliQK6sU

 

This was the easiest pick of the entire thing. L’Ulivo is an amazing Italian Sheep’s milk cheese with an earthy rustic flavor and flaky texture. The most important aspect of this wrestler-cheese comparison, is that L’Ulivo is aged in clay jars with olive branches inside. That Jar totally could have been Undertaker’s Urn. L’Ulivo is a vastly superior and more interesting cheese than Undertaker is wrestler, but that clay jar-urn connection is too much to overcome.

 

 

83) Roddy Piper - Piper’s Pyramid –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=BRwOW5zYN-uA0wKB9534CQ&q=piper%27s+pyramid+cheese&oq=Piper%27s+Pyr&gs_l=img.3.1.0j0i24k1l2.37800.39766.0.41004.11.9.0.2.2.0.120.762.8j1.9.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.11.808...0i67k1j0i30k1.0.UXRUsMiP_50

 

I had a couple of different options for Roddy Piper, mostly Scottish cheeses, but then I was like “Oh Yeah, Piper’s Pyramid.” Duh. Piper’s pyramid is made by Capriole Farms in Indiana, probably the best and most important Farm in American Cheese history. This is bloomy rind goat cheese modeled after a French Valencay and lightly dusted with Paprika which gives it a slightly spicy flavor in addition to the buttery sweet tang of the goat’s milk. Piper’s Pyramid is a better cheese than Roddy Piper is wrestler, and I’m a huge fan of Roddy Piper.

 

 

82) Steve Williams - Blue Murder Scottish Blue Cheese –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=LxwOW8qXL-GB0gLInp6wBg&q=Blue+Murder+scottish+blue&oq=Blue+Murder+scottish+blue&gs_l=img.3...32381.37701.0.37893.31.26.2.3.3.0.166.1904.22j3.25.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.14.951...0j0i67k1j0i10i67k1j0i8i30k1j0i24k1.0.cUvc9ZYyMGI

 

Another name to name comparison that made itself an easy pick as I was struggling to come up with the right comparison. This is an excellent blue with a bold, strong flavor. I would say Blue Murder is better than Dr Death, but I've only ever had Blue Murder once and it was like 10 years ago. But those a great names!

 

81) Yoshihiro Tajiri – Barely Buzzed –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=857&bih=546&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=VhwOW5qSIqWU0gKWzJ2IDQ&q=barely+buzzed+cheese&oq=barely+buzzed+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l4.36542.44373.0.44573.18.13.0.5.5.0.160.1181.11j2.13.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.18.1292...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.p83jyuYBaJI

 

Yet another comparison that became pretty easy once I figured it out. The Japanese Buzz Saw is absolutely Barely Buzzed. This cheese, made by Beehive Cheese in Utah is a super unique American cheese and quite honestly one of the most interesting and ambitious cheeses ever made. This rich and creamy cow’s milk cheese is rubbed with French Superior Lavender buds and a blend of espresso beans from Central & South American and Indonesia. Versatile like Tajiri in that it works well as a breakfast cheese or as something to serve on a cheese plate with various salami’s, olives and nuts. But this is all about the name-nickname combo. Barely Buzzed is a better cheese than the Japanese Buzzsaw is wrestler, but its pretty close.

[El-P]

This is the best thread on this board in years. I'm kinda having a break from posting, but I had to say this and I will read that thread.

 

Did you just compare Onita with Mimolette ? I love me some Chabichou du Poitou.

 

And there's no way I'm not posting this :

 

[gordi]

I would have given Ron Garven a more solid, basic, workingman's cheese, like Wisconsin Cheddar or something like that... but it's not difficult to agree with your choice of a hard, salty, consistent cheese that packs a punch.

 

Giving Tanahashi and Toyota blue cheeses cracked me up, mostly because a lot of my Japanese friends ***hate*** blue cheese, even the adventurous eaters. Brie and Camembert are quite popular over here, relatively. In my experience, Japan is simply not cheese country... Anyway, I love the payoff in giving them blue cheeses because they are popular, but you don't like them

 

I can't believe that there is a cheese called "Piper's Pyramid!" How perfect is that? It looks delicious, too.

 

I was hoping that Monk's Head cheese would make your list!! Tete de Moine is one of my personal favourites. There is a lovely little pub in my hometown of Nara where they serve a nicely fruity Japanese craft ale called Yona Yona on tap (an old style pull tap, too) and they have a lovely large table made from a varnished section of a large old tree trunk, and you can sit and have a glass of Yona Yona accompanied by some nuts and dried fruits and little curly girolled slices of Monk's Head cheese. The owner's dad has been sick recently, so the pub has been closed while she takes care of him. That makes me appreciate all the more how lucky I am to have a place like that, within walking distance. Great match for Castignoli!

[gordi]

OH! And, as for Onita. I cannot and will not disparage Mimolette...

 

BUT:

 

I was once invited to a "Where the Wild Things Are"-themed birthday party, and they served "Moss Balls" which were cream cheese rolled into balls with tons of spring onion, parsley, and green herbs. Absolutely delicious spread on crackers!!

 

And, well... Onita... WIld Thing...

 

Maybe as a back-up plan if the Mimolette is unavailable.

[elliott]

Thoughts on that pick for Undertaker? I love that clay jar. I have one in my backyard to dispose of cigarettes.

 

And onto the next batch. 80-71!

 

80) Tito Santana - Pierre Robert –

https://www.google.com/search?q=pierre+robert+cheese&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjik8CG-K7bAhUZGDQIHR0dAEQQ_AUICigB&biw=915&bih=535

 

I went with Pierre Robert for Tito Santana partly because they are such perfectly clichéd names. I also picked this comparison because like Tito Santana, the French Triple Cream Brie Pierre Robert is the ultimate babyface crowd pleaser and consistently excellent. Often overshadowed by other bries or babyface wrestlers, you can always count on Tito Santana and Pierre Robert to deliver in the ring or on the baguette. This cheese is rich, buttery, sweet, impossibly creamy and just a delight. Tito Santana and Pierre Robert are of roughly equivalent quality in my opinion.

 

 

79) Terry Gordy - Langres –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=g2IPW9zWOoHv9AOBy524Cg&q=Langres+cheese&oq=Langres+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l9.13688.16333.0.16501.15.13.0.2.2.0.137.1127.11j2.13.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.15.1172...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.xJhkY_N9EzI

 

I decided on Langres for Terry Gordy. This washed rind French cow’s milk cheese comes from the Champagne region of France. This has a soft and crumbly texture with an funky aroma and somewhat intense flavor. Because this cheese is never rotated during the aging process, it has a small dip or crater in the top of it. Truthfully it is meant for Champagne, but I recommend pouring a Saison or Belgian Ale into the crater and waiting for it to soak down into the cheese. It will make the funky-ness more approachable and who doesn’t want beer and cheese? I picked it to represent Terry Gordy because it packs a wallop and is at its best when soaking in alcohol. It is also best enjoyed when it is young in its life span. You don't want a Langres that has been aged too much. Langres is a much better cheese than Terry Gordy was wrestler.

 

 

78) Dynamite Kid - Caerphilly –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=nGIPW_SWBY_C0PEPjoyh2Ag&q=caerphilly+cheese&oq=cae&gs_l=img.3.0.0i67k1l4j0l2j0i67k1j0l3.42075.42710.0.44205.3.3.0.0.0.0.163.414.0j3.3.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.3.411....0.Ge7RcQdIRVo

 

I was trying to come up with something good for Dynamite in terms of a connection to his name and I couldn't come up with one so I ended up on the English Caerphilly. This cow’s milk cheese is has a light flaky texture and a sweet lactic flavor. In the end I picked this because when you say the name outloud it sounds like you’re saying “Carefully” and you should always act Carefully when you’re around Dynamite and Dynamite Kid. Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week. Caerphilly is a better cheese than Dynamite Kid was wrestler but Dynamite was certainly more historically important to wrestling than Caerphilly is to cheese/food.

 

 

77) Rick Rude - Anton’s Red Love – (You HAVE to click on the link)

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=yWIPW9eBGtmw0PEP0-ig-AM&q=Anton%27s+Red+Love+Cheese&oq=Anton%27s+Red+Love+Cheese&gs_l=img.3...26316.30485.0.30613.27.24.2.1.1.0.144.1948.19j5.24.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.16.1239...0j0i67k1j0i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.vRlgnEtUPWs

 

How could this be anything but? This organic washed rind Bavarian cheese is made by one of the biggest weirdo hilarious goofballs in an industry full of weirdo hilarious goofballs. The cheese is rich, creamy, funky aromatically but sweet and fruity flavor wise. This was another one of the easiest cheese-wrestler comparisons to make because DUH. Anton's Red Love is a better cheese than Rick Rude was wrestler.

 

 

76) Hiroshi Hase - Robiola Bosnia –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=6GIPW9iRNd-S0PEP8ZSrkAw&q=robiola+bosina+cheese&oq=robiola+bosina+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1.93479.98272.0.98385.23.16.2.5.5.0.150.1433.10j5.15.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.21.1507...0i67k1j0i5i30k1j0i30k1j0i8i30k1j0i10i24k1.0.klp44WMIzDw

 

Hase was another guy I sort of struggled with. He’s been highly regarded by folks in our circles in the past, but has kind of fallen off in recent years compared to what he once was. This has very much been my experience with Robiola, an Italian mixed milk cheese made of Piedmont Cow & Sheep’s Milk. It is definitely a fan favorite with a creamy texture and a sweet almost mushroomy flavor when ripened. I landed on this for Hase because I feel the two milks can be viewed as representative of Hase’s career spent as a Junior and a Heavy OR it can be seen to mirror his time spent in New Japan and All Japan. Regardless of those connections, both are crowd favorites that probably don’t get their just due. Robiola is a better cheese than Hase is a wrestler.

 

 

75) Hulk Hogan - American Cheese –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=TGMPW7KXDdPR9AO2gLqwDA&q=American+CHeese&oq=American+CHeese&gs_l=img.3..0i67k1j0l9.19735.21339.0.21468.15.11.0.4.4.0.162.1086.8j3.11.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.14.1039....0.kv08VzjlkMI

 

I kind of felt like it had to be this. He is a real American. And popular when you’re a kid. Moving on. Hulk Hogan is a better wrestler than American Cheese is cheese.

 

 

74) Atlantis – Serra da Estrela –

https://www.google.com/search?nfpr=1&tbm=isch&q=serra+da+estrela+cheese&spell=1&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj69tGA-a7bAhXpHDQIHT63AwYQBQgwKAA&biw=915&bih=535&dpr=1

 

One of my personal favorite wrestlers gets to be one of my personal favorite cheeses. Serra de Estrela, this gem of a Portuguese raw sheep’s milk cheese has been 100% handmade for centuries in the Portuguese mountains receiving PDO status in 1996. The washed rind gives the cheese an aggressive aroma that belies a richly sweet flavor. In terms of texture, it is extremely soft and spreadable making this a great cheese to have on a baguette with a slice of proscuitto. The reason I picked it for Atlantis, aside from personal feelings about both wrestler and cheese, Washed rind cheeses are acquired tastes that definitely aren’t for everybody, much like lucha libre. But the sweet flavor and divine texture make this one much more palatable for the new taster, much like Atlantis’ high flying and epic matches make for a good gateway to Lucha Libre. Estrela is also Portuguese for Star, which Atlantis definitely is. Also, I kind of feel like a Washed Rind is pretty close to having a Mask. So I’m grabbing that as a reason as well. Also, as noted above, Serra de Estrela has been made for centuries, so roughly the same length of time Atlantis has been having great matches. My gut says Serra de Estrela is a better cheese than Atlantis is wrestler, but thinking about it a little, Atlantis is fucking awesome and this is probably closer to a push.

 

 

73) Chris Jericho - Humboldt Fog –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=jGMPW4afIuLQ9APbkKvoDQ&q=humboldt+fog+cheese&oq=humboldt+fog+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0l2j0i30k1l2j0i8i30k1l2j0i24k1l4.21997.27946.0.28088.12.12.0.0.0.0.140.1100.9j3.12.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.12.1093...0i67k1j0i5i30k1.0.lpwVDhIlZao

 

This is also a really personalized pick. Humboldt Fog is America’s most well-known artisan goat cheese. If I did a Resident Evil Poll asking people to name American Artisan Cheeses, “Humboldt Fog” would likely get the most responses no matter where you are in the country. This California Goat Cheese is highly regarded for it’s approachably goaty flavor, creamy yet firm texture and strikingly beautiful appearance. But I hate it and I hate all the people who say it’s the best goat cheese or the best blue cheese (its not a blue cheese at all FYI, that little blue line down the center is vegetable ash). Humboldt Fog is the cheese people say is their favorite cheese when they want to sound like they know more than they do but don’t actually know shit. Just like Chris Jericho. It was definitely cool to like this cheese and wrestler at one point, but that was in 1997. If you go up to a cheese counter and ask about Humboldt Fog in 2018, that’s like saying Chris Jericho is your favorite wrestler. Cool. Humboldt Fog was at one point fantastic. But it lost what made it truly great when it got super famous and had to go from hand-made actually artisan to manufactured. Humboldt Fog is still a better cheese than Chris Jericho is wrestler. Easily.

 

72) Brian Pillman - Bayley Hazen Blue – (2nd picture is one from space, for real)

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=1GMPW9HMBcq60PEP7eei-AE&q=bayley+hazen+blue&oq=bayley+hazen+blue&gs_l=img.3..0l2j0i5i30k1l2j0i24k1l3.26997.28375.0.28518.10.10.0.0.0.0.167.1038.7j3.10.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.10.1036...0i10k1j0i30k1.0.hrV66XgZW3w

 

I picked this wonderful Blue Cheese from Vermont to represent Brian Pillman for a couple of reasons. First, Bayley Hazen is inspired by and created as an homage to the famous English Stilton Blue. This means you’re going to get a firmer, more crumbly blue cheese than you might typically see that is also less intense flavor wise without skipping on all the complexity. This has a more mellow almost dark chocolate flavor bursting through that usual blue flavor you’re familiar with. I feel like its foreign inspiration can be seen in Brian’s Hart Family Dungeon and Stampede Wrestling Origins. A wheel of this was also sent into space (because cheese mongers are hilarious) which can be seen in Brian’s High Flyin’. Lastly, I figured this had to be the choice for Brian Pillman because “Bayley Hazen” sounds like the name of a a stripper Brian would have dated). Bayley Hazen is a better cheese than Pillman is wrestler for his career. At his peak, Pillman was actually the better wrestler than Bayley is cheese.

 

 

71) Dick Togo - Muffato -

https://www.google.com/search?biw=915&bih=535&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=8WMPW9j4IayT0PEPxKOB2Aw&q=muffato+cheese&oq=muffato+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0i24k1.40199.42041.0.42168.14.10.0.4.4.0.141.859.8j2.10.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.14.937...0j0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1.0.2bIci-riQlQ

 

For one of my favorite wrestlers ever, I picked one of my favorite cheeses, Muffato. For Dick Togo, a wrestler who has worked literally all over the world with an extremely varied career in terms of working style, promotions, region, even his own physical size, I had to pick a truly unique cheese and Muffato is perhaps the most interesting cheese I’ve ever had conceptually. This is an Italian Blue Cheese (pretty sure Togo hit Italy on his world tour) aged 3-4 monthes on wooden planks made from Fir trees and the cheese itself is covered with mint, chamomile, marjoram and verbena. When I first heard of it I was like “Blue Cheese covered in Mint, Chamomile, etc that’s nuts” much like my reaction when I first learned about Togo’s retirement tour. “He wrestled in CHILE? THERE’S WRESTLING IN CHILE! WHAT?” The cheese itself is a harder, more crumbly blue cheese with a really mellow blue cheese flavor but a beautifully complex herbaceous woodsy flavor overall. This is absolutely one of the best cheeses in the entire world but is hard to find. I can’t recommend it highly enough, just like Dick Togo. This cheese and wrestler are of roughly equivalent quality.

[elliott]

Sorry for the delay on the next batch of comparisons. Let's hit 70-61!

 

 

70) Yuki Ishikawa - Crottin de Chavignol –

https://www.google.com/search?q=crottin+de+chavignol&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj0ucP-hrjbAhUTMH0KHad3CrgQ_AUICigB&biw=956&bih=541

 

For Yuki Ishikawa, I picked this Raw Goat’s milk cheese from France’s famed Loire Valley. I landed on this cheese for a number of reasons. Stylistically goat cheese, like BattlArts or Shoot style or Futen, can be difficult for some to truly appreciate, but fans of the style are often obsessive. They don’t just like goat cheese or shoot style, it is the best. Crottin’s are also very small wheels usually weighing around 2oz. Ishikawa was never a very big wrestler either in physical size or overall stardom, but within his style he was a fan favorite, like a Crottin. Also, Ishikawa was a very good wrestler early on in his career and whenever he popped up years later as an older veteran, he still looked great. This is represented in a Crottin in that it is a rare cheese that can be eaten basically at any point in its aging process. A young crottin is going to be rich and creamy texturally but as it ages, it will get flakier and sharper. Either way a crottin is going to be awesome. Yuki Ishikawa is actually probably a better wrestler than Crottin de Chavignol is cheese, but it is really close.

 

 

69) Blue Panther - Roquefort –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=IioUW-G-OoS_0PEPscKimAk&q=roquefort+cheese&oq=roquefort+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0l10.17058.20616.0.20769.18.10.1.7.7.0.169.739.6j2.8.0....0...1c.1.64.img..2.16.935...0i67k1j0i24k1.0.YzHk6aQGapI

 

For Blue Panther, I went with Roquefort, France’s most famous Blue Cheese. Made from Sheeps milk, and aged to this day in natural limestone caves (most “Cave aged” cheeses are aged in man made underground cellars, not Roquefort), Roquefort has always been considered one of the finest cheeses in the world. It is technically brilliant, visually beautiful and extremely memorable. Roquefort is extremely rich and full flavored (a little bit goes a long way) making it perfect for a charcuterie board with salami’s, pates, and bold wines but is still a very popular choice to cook with (stuff a burger with Roquefort, grill that sucker and thank me later) gives it a versatility you see in Blue Panther’s ability to succeed in maestro matches and bloody brawls. I also picked Roquefort for Blue Panther because, as I’ve said many times before, Lucha is an acquired taste, much like blue cheese. It isn’t for everyone. And sadly, because of their respective reputations, newcomers to the style of cheese/wrestling often end up trying out Roquefort/Blue Panther early on in their journey, not getting it and getting turned off. This is an advanced cheese and an advanced wrestler. If someone tells me they’ve never seen a Lucha match before, I’m not going to recommend Blue Panther vs Atlantis from 1997, much as I love that match. We’ve got plenty of time to get there. Don’t jump into the deep end. Roquefort is a better cheese than Blue Panther is wrestler.

 

 

68) Kurt Angle - Cahill’s Porter -

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=VCoUW4yBObCQ0PEPjJuw6AI&q=Cahill%27s+Porter+Cheese&oq=Cahill%27s+Porter+Cheese&gs_l=img.3..0i30k1.3143.6261.0.6435.17.7.10.0.0.0.99.537.7.7.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.17.758...0i8i30k1j0i24k1.0.ByBErIXs2Z0

 

For Kurt Angle, I went with Cahill’s Porter. This Irish cheese is made from milk mixed with Guinness-brewed Porter. It is absolutely beautiful visually, looking like a marbleized cheesecake. You’d think Beer & Cheese are perfect. This seems to have all of the qualities of something that would be incredible. Sucks. Totally fucking sucks. One of the most disappointing experiences ever. So sad. Cahill’s Porter, like Kurt Angle, should be one of the best cheeses ever. It even looks like its going to be. It just isn’t.

 

67) Jack Brisco - Brie de Meaux –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=XCoUW5D0DNWv0PEPka62uA0&q=brie+de+meaux+cheese&oq=brie+de+meaux+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i8i30k1.24316.29149.0.29309.18.18.0.0.0.0.206.1608.10j5j1.16.0....0...1c.1.64.img..2.16.1600...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i24k1.0.fhIgqYNtBPw

 

For one of the most famous historical names on the top 100 and former NWA champion, I decided to pick one of the most historically famous cheeses from the country most known for producing great cheese. Brie de Meaux is a classic French Brie. Creamy, velvety texture which easily represents the inherent babyface likeability of Jack Brisco with the complex mushroomy and earthy flavors acting as a comparative base for Brisco’s technical brilliance. Brie de Meaux is a classic cheese like Jack Brisco is a classic champion. Jack Brisco is probably a better wrestler than Brie de Meaux is cheese, but I’d need more footage to feel totally comfortable with that. Brie de Meaux rocks.

 

 

66) Keiji Mutoh - Herve Mons’ Tomme du Berger –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=oCoUW72QKfiz0PEPtZK_2Ag&q=Tomme+de+Berger+cheese&oq=Tomme+de+Berger+cheese&gs_l=img.3...2145.3197.0.3388.7.7.0.0.0.0.97.477.6.6.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.0.0....0.zR9epd6Bd0Y

 

For Keiji Mutoh, famous as much for his alternate ego Great Muta, I decided to pick Tomme du Berger, a semi-soft washed rind French cheese made from a mixture of raw goat & sheep’s milk cheese. The cheese itself has a supple yet creamy texture and a bold toasty meaty flavor. I wanted a mix milk cheese for Mutoh because of his dual characters Mutoh & Muta as well as his time in New Japan & All Japan. The washed rind is also a fair representative of the Muta character’s face point. This pungent and funky cheese will also stab you in the face with a fork if you’re not paying attention. Tomme du Berger is a better cheese than Mutoh is wrestler. But if Mutoh worked to his full potential more consistently, this would be much closer.

 

 

65) Shinjiro Ohtani - Crocodile Tear -

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=pCoUW7bOO_LB0PEP7KyBuAw&q=Crocodile+Tear+Cheese&oq=Crocodile+Tear+Cheese&gs_l=img.3...19902.24983.0.25157.31.20.8.3.3.0.141.1732.11j7.18.0....0...1c.1.64.img..2.15.1240...0j0i67k1j0i30k1j0i24k1.0.Uqe7UILQgxo

 

For Shinjiro Ohtani, wrestling’s best crybaby, I felt compelled to go with Crocodile Tear. This beautiful cheese from Capriole Farms is a pasteurized goat cheese made into a cone or teardrop shape and lightly dusted with paprika, which gives it a spicy flavor to go along with the lovely goaty tang. As it a ages the cheese becomes firmer and funkier or stiffer for wrestling lexicon. But this comparison is really about the name and Ohtani’s frequent in match weeping. Peak Ohtani is roughly the equivalent in quality to Crocodile Tear.

 

 

64) Sgt. Slaughter – Stinking Bishop –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=vyoUW_LRNrKu0PEPg_CxwAE&q=Stinking+Bishop+Cheese&oq=Stinking+Bishop+Cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l9.16750.19877.0.20023.22.12.0.10.10.0.146.973.10j1.11.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.21.1210...0i67k1j0i10i67k1j0i30k1.0.TXzn8ZZTmgs

 

This was one of those picks that was super easy and all based on the name. Sgt Slaughter is maybe the best name/gimmick in wrestling history. Obviously the same could be said for Stinking Bishop. This English cheese is washed in Perry, an pear based alcohol, which gives the rind a rusted pink/brown color and is the reason this Bishop stinks. It is made in small quantities, but it’s name, smell, and funky flavor have made this a world-renowned cheese. I feel like it’s small quantity but big reputation makes the Slaughter Connection even deeper because Slaughter made it this high even though he seems to lack the depth of matches for someone ranked 64^th all time. Really though, this was about pairing up the two best names in Cheese & Wrestling. Stinking Bishop is a better cheese than Sgt Slaughter is wrestler.

 

63) Giant Baba - Mammoth Cheddar –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=1CoUW_zPN-aw0PEPlPOduAc&q=Mammoth+Cheddar+Cheese&oq=Mammoth+Cheddar+Cheese&gs_l=img.3...17381.21407.0.21542.24.19.1.4.4.0.144.1546.14j4.18.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.18.1250...0j0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1j0i24k1.0.qmZ5lCfeSwE

 

This was another name based comparison. Mammoth cheddar is exactly that. Made in Wisconsin, wheels weighing over 5000lbs have been made. Mostly because “hey we can do it!” Flavor wise, it is your basic aged cheddar. Nothing to get excited about. Giant Baba is a vastly better wrestler than Mammoth Cheddar is cheese.

 

 

62) Kiyoshi Tamura – Rush Creek Reserve –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=6yoUW_XTErP59APtwJT4DA&q=rush+creek+reserve+cheese&oq=rush+creek+reserve+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0i24k1.22727.28571.0.28785.25.16.2.7.7.0.197.1362.8j5.13.0....0...1c.1.64.img..3.19.1423...0j0i67k1j0i8i30k1j0i30k1.0.bY63EVRdnbY

 

For one of my favorite wrestlers, I went with one of my favorite cheeses. Rush Creek Reserve is a seasonal cheese made only in autumn and I felt a seasonal cheese would be good for a shoot style wrestler who worked a limited schedule. This soft cows milk cheese from Wisconsin is one of the most ambitious cheese’s made in the United States. It was created as an American take on the famous Swiss Cheese Vacherin Mont D’or. Like it’s inspiration, Rush Creek Reserve is a soft ripened cow’s milk cheese wrapped in spruce bark which gives it a woodsy, funky aroma that gives way to a truly beefy and meaty creamy cheese that is borderline liquid. Don’t cut this cheese in half or you’ll lose all the glory. Carefully cut the top off with a knife, peel the top back and dip your crackers, your baguettes or your spoons right into the cheese. The technique and expertise needed to make a cheese this good is amazing. It became an easy comparison to make for maybe the greatest shoot style master. This wrestler & cheese are of similar quality in their fields. One of the handful of best ever.

 

 

61) Bull Nakano – Quadrello di Bufala –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=956&bih=541&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=CSsUW-67MKez0PEPtr-UgAU&q=quadrello+di+bufala+cheese&oq=Quadrello+d&gs_l=img.3.1.0j0i24k1l2.22432.25414.0.27032.17.10.6.1.3.0.134.846.9j1.10.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.17.1015...0i67k1j0i10k1j0i5i30k1j0i30k1.0.XLfodBKbrdk

 

For Bull Nakano, I felt a Water Buffalo milk cheese was most appropriate. Even though bulls are cows, but you know, fuck it. I landed on Quadrello di Bufala an Italian washed rind Water Buffalo milk cheese. I picked it because the idea of a washed rind Buffalo milk cheese might sound intimidating, much like “Joshi Wrestling” but this creamy, rich, fatty, grassy and sweet cheese is a great crowd-pleasing time tested introduction to Water Buffalo milk cheeses. Its hard to imagine folks not like Quadrello di Bufala or Bull Nakano. Both are great at smashing presumed ideals of the wrestling and cheese style. Bull Nakano is a better wrestler than Quadrello di Bufala is cheese.

[gordi]

If only there were a picture of Baba standing beside a wheel of Mammoth Cheddar.

[elliott]

Next batch up 60-51!

 

60) Volk Han - Vacherin Mont D’or –

https://www.google.com/search?q=vacherin+mont+d%27or&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiY48SQybrbAhUOHjQIHQTRAPkQ_AUICygC&biw=1006&bih=511

 

When I landed on Rush Creek Reserve for Tamura, going with its inspiration, Vacherin Mont D’Or for Volk Han really fell into place. Check out the Tamura/Rush Creek Reserve section and everything regarding the texture/flavor/impressiveness of the cheese there could be easily repeated here for Vacherin, which has been called “The Holy Grail of Cheeses.” I picked Vacherin for Volk Han and Rush Creek for Tamura instead of vice versa because Vacherin, like Volk Han, was legendary and an all time great before Rush Creek/Tamura. Anyway, the Cheese & Wrestler are of similar quality. One of the handful of best ever.

 

 

59) Samoa Joe - Grayson –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=7XsVW7ywIr2T0PEP47i-yAM&q=Grayson+cheese&oq=Grayson+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1.18136.20663.0.21096.14.13.0.1.1.0.190.1203.10j3.13.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.14.1222...0i67k1j0i10k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.Qgvwmrs0itI

 

For one of the most popular indy wrestlers ever who finally made it big, I went with an American Artisan cheese that has grown from small beginnings to something you’ll now see all across the country. Grasyon, made in Virginia is a creamy rich washed rind cheese with an extremely pungent aroma that will kick you right in the face just like Samoa Joe. However, once you get past that initial stiffness, you’ll find a really nice approachable cheese with sweet grassy flavors. Grayson is a better cheese than Samoa Joe is wrestler, but at Joe’s peak, it’s a much closer comparison.

 

 

58) Owen Hart - Explorateur –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=BXwVW_D7JdDJ0PEPl8iSsAo&q=explorateur+cheese&oq=explorateur+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l2.18404.21954.0.22883.18.14.0.4.4.0.168.1237.13j1.14.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.18.1327...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.SF6X1Lcn3Ko

 

For Owen Hart, I went with this crowd pleasing French Triple Cream brie created in the 1950s and named after the first US Satellite. I decided to go with Explorateur for Owen Hart because it is a popular crowd pleasing cheese that I can’t imagine people not liking. It is rich, creamy, buttery, but like Owen Hart’s wrestling character, it will turn on you quickly as it ages and ripens. I also felt the Explorateur name was fitting for a guy who worked in the US, Canada, Mexico, England, Germany, Japan, and I’m sure elsewhere on various WWF tours. This guy was a world traveler who was able to translate his style all over the world. Owen Hart at his peak is probably the equivalent or a little bit better than Explorateur.

 

 

57) Bill Dundee - Pont l’Eveque –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=HXwVW_6yIvS00PEP97ahuAM&q=pont+l%27eveque+cheese&oq=pont+l%27eveque+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l7.20589.23918.0.24160.13.10.0.3.3.0.276.1104.7j2j1.10.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.13.1182...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.tlFNt_YG41g

 

I went with this cheese for Bill Dundee, because it is a small format cheese (usually weighing under 2lbs) that has been made in one little town (called Pont l’Eveque in Normandy) for centuries. This cheese is a washed rind that is creamy and rich wit a beefy punch that will take your breath away. For one of the best punchers ever who made his biggest name with success in the small American City of Memphis, Pont l’Eveque became an easy choice. Bill Dundee is a better wrestler than Pont l’Eveque is cheese.

 

56) Jim Breaks - Keen’s Cheddar –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=VHwVW73ZBfjF0PEP1J6XoAw&q=keen%27s+cheddar&oq=keen%27s+cheddar&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l4.5189.5271.0.6613.2.2.0.0.0.0.180.180.0j1.1.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.1.180....0.WzgLvJZjJAM

 

Keen’s cheddar is a highly regarded traditional English Clothbound Cheddar. A common misconception about cheddar cheese is that it is a style of cheese. It really isn’t, it is a style of cheese making. The traditional centuries old cheddars perfected by the English cheesemaking masters were aged within a linen cloth that had been dipped in a vat of lard. This gives the cheese a meaty gamey flavor in addition to familiar “sharp cheddar flavor” most folks are going to be used to. They are super complex and so much more interesting than your typical “cheddar.” I picked it for Jim Breaks because it is English and highly regarded. I’m phoning this in though because I have a rule that if you murder your wife, you get a phoned in comparison.

 

 

55) Curt Hennig - Mahon –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=XHwVW-iHIPiN0PEPg-uL-Aw&q=Mahon+Cheese&oq=Mahon+Cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l9.11529.13467.0.13724.12.10.0.2.2.0.196.1027.6j4.10.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.12.1077...0i67k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1j0i8i10i30k1.0.kd-Ac0Y5oMM

 

Mahon is a Spanish cow’s milk cheese that is super popular. It is rich, creamy, lactic and very mild. It is one of the most approachable kid friendly cheeses ever. I picked it because like the Mr Perfect character, this is the sort of cheese that will turns kids into life long cheese/wrestling fans. It is great to cook with or snack on in a cheese plate like Curt’s ability to work heel or face. There is a young version aged around 3-4 months that I really like and an aged 1 yr & up version that I actally don’t like as much. This is representative of Hennig’s decline as a worker from his great early days in Portland and AWA to his disappointing WWF run. Curt Hennig is actually a better wrestler than Mahon is cheese, but there’s a time and place for Mahon.

 

 

54) Greg Valentine – Montgomery’s Cheddar –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=bXwVW4yYLriv0PEPq66zoAc&q=montgomery%27s+cheddar&oq=Montgomery%27s+Cheddar&gs_l=img.3.0.0j0i24k1.22162.27254.0.28893.20.11.0.9.9.0.157.1014.9j2.11.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.20.1223...0i67k1j0i10i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.HVD3mBbbCiY

 

Montgomery’s Cheddar is was my pick for Greg Valentine not just because both are great examples of cheeses and wrestlers, but because of family connections. Greg Valentine is of course the son of the legendary Johnny Valentine, and current head cheesemaker Jamie Montgomery is continuing the family business that goes back generations, crafting and perfecting one of the finest cheeses in the world. Montgomery’s Cheddar is a Raw Cow’s Milk Clothbound cheddar aged for 12-18 months wrapped in a muslin cloth. This aging process and the fact that it is hand made from start to finish is representative of the Valentine tendency to start slow and take their time to warm up and truly get going. But if you’re patient and wait till its just right, you’ll get one of the most satisfying explosions of flavor ever. Family connection and artistic brilliance is the reason behind the Montgomery’s Cheddar Valentine Wrestling Family comparison. Montgomery’s Cheddar is a better cheese than Greg Valentine is wrestler. And I’m a huge fan of Greg Valentine.

 

 

53) Dick Murdoch – Monte Enebro –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=i3wVW8HaI66v0PEPnMWSkA0&q=monte+enebro+cheese&oq=monte+ene&gs_l=img.3.2.0l3j0i30k1l2j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1l4.19176.20240.0.21952.9.9.0.0.0.0.169.900.6j3.9.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.9.893...0i67k1j0i10i30k1.0.ktk5ImXLuXs

 

For Dick Murdoch I landed on a personal favorite of mind, Monte Enebro. An ash ripened goat cheese from Spain. I honestly couldn’t really think of a great one to pick for Dick Murdoch that made a lot of sense, but Monte Enebro is a funky, barnyardy cheese that will punch you right in the mouth. Dick Murdoch is definitely barnyardy and will punch you right in the face, so at its heart, this comparison seemed natural. This wrestler & cheese are of similar quality I would say. Both fantastic.

 

 

52) Akira Hokuto - Azeitao –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=onwVW5aVIdSN0PEPnoKGsA0&q=azeitao+cheese&oq=Azei&gs_l=img.3.0.0i67k1j0l9.14351.15011.0.17412.4.4.0.0.0.0.196.424.3j1.4.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.4.422....0._NVLXBnFIgs

 

For Akira Hokuto, a long time personal favorite with maybe the greatest top tier peak performances of all time, I picked what is probably my all time favorite cheese. Unfortunately it is a small production small format cheese so it is rare that I’m able to get my hands on a wheel. This can be used as comparison to Hokuto’s brief run as an all time performer. This DOP protected Portuguese Raw washed rind sheep’s milk cheese has an oozy, rich creamy texture and one of the most unique flavors I’ve ever experienced. It is both meaty and rich yet unmistakably tropical and fruity all at once. The depth and complexity of flavor works easily as a comparison to Hokuto’s peak matches. Forget about Cheeses, Azeitao is the best tasting consumable product in the entire world. It is a better cheese than Akira Hokuto is wrestler.

 

 

51) Andre The Giant - Comte’ –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=1006&bih=511&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=tHwVW9DNLLPC0PEP5Oqa4Aw&q=Comte+cheese&oq=Comte+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i67k1j0l4j0i30k1l4.17120.20738.0.20889.20.12.4.4.4.0.168.1071.8j3.11.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.19.1268...0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.qFjC4XFVrxQ

 

This was another one of the easiest picks to make. Comte’ a raw cow’s milk French cheese is made in the mountains of Eastern France and comes in enormous 80-90lb wheels. The cheese has a very strong aroma and nutty flavor but is always a crowd pleaser. The flavor profile of this cheese can range from fruity to salty to beefy to nutty and back again but is always great. Similar to the way Andre could all over the world in every territory and always manage to wow and amaze. Comte’ had to be Andre. Comte’ is probably a better cheese overall than Andre, but as the years go by we seem to be getting blessed with more and more incredible Andre matches, so he’s probably closing the gap. Anyway, this wrestler and this cheese transcend wrestling and cheese and are their own experiences entirely.

[elliott]

Additionally, today is National Cheese Day. So, this worked out perfectly on accident.

[NotJayTabb]

I was thoroughly enjoying this thread, until you called Caerphilly "English" and my inner Welshman started to cry 😊

 

Aside from that, this is one of the best things I've ever read.

[elliott]

I was thoroughly enjoying this thread, until you called Caerphilly "English" and my inner Welshman started to cry 😊

 

Aside from that, this is one of the best things I've ever read.

 

Damnit! You're right. I'm so sorry! To be fair...there's the evidence that I wrote this like 95% off the top of my head...further proving my insanity. As if more proof was needed.

 

With that said. Here's the next batch!

 

 

50) Billy Robinson - Stilton –

https://www.google.com/search?q=stilton+cheese&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjDxsDonMXbAhXHIjQIHfjaAb8Q_AUICygC&biw=951&bih=566

 

For England’s greatest and most popular exported wrestler, I went with England’s greatest and most popular exported cheese. Stilton is a beautiful cheese and the only English Cheese to have European Name Protected status guaranteeing where it is made, how it is made, and the milk used to make it are the same for every wheel of Stilton made. This large blue cheese is rare for centuries old European cheeses in that it is made using pasteurized milk. Many people presume that pasteurized cheese is less flavorful than Raw cheese, and Stilton is the exception that disproves the rule. Stilton is universally beloved and considered one of the most complex and interesting cheeses in the world making it a perfect companion for Billy Robinson’s unquestionably brilliant in ring proficiency. Stilton is an enormous aged Blue cheese with a dense crumbly texture and a spicy and complex flavor. Traditionally paired with port wine, stilton is a classic cheese. Two of England’s greatest exports to the world: Stilton and Billy Robinson are the perfect cheese/wrestler comparison. This wrestler and cheese are of similar quality.

 

49) Aja Kong - Munster –

 

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=9xEbW56EJePl9APnnqiwCQ&q=french+munster+cheese&oq=french+munster+cheese&gs_l=img.3...8507.9497.0.10578.7.4.0.0.0.0.0.0..0.0....0...1c.1.64.img..7.0.0....0.yKBbAn1Sx20

 

I mean, this had to be. You can’t write anything about Aja Kong without using the word “monster” and munster was just sitting there staring me right in the face. This washed rind raw cow’s milk cheese from France is a strong flavored and super funky smelling soft spreadable cheese will punch you right in the face if you’re not ready for it. Excellent cheese that could only represent a Monster Heel like Aja Kong. Munster and Aja Kong are of similar quality in the cheese and wrestling worlds respectively.

 

 

48) Fit Finlay - Durrus Farmhouse Cheese –

 

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=AxIbW9aEGqOR0PEP8reloAI&q=durrus+farmhouse+cheese&oq=durrus+farm&gs_l=img.3.0.0i24k1.23997.25425.0.27052.11.9.0.1.1.0.224.1420.2j4j3.9.0....0...1c.1.64.img..1.10.1439...0j0i67k1j0i30k1.0.j6bdA7V0U6c

 

This was a pretty easy pick too. I went with a cream-colored Irish raw washed rind cow’s milk cheese with a pungent aroma that will forearm your right in the chest. This cheese is enjoyed both early in the ripening process but is probably even better as it ages and reaches the end of its life span. The Irish connection was really too much to overcome. Durrus is a better cheese than Fit Finlay is wrestler, but I’ve never been the biggest Finlay fan.

 

 

47) Brock Lesnar - Pleasant Ridge Reserve –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=IRIbW5jlG5PW9APusprYCw&q=pleasant+ridge+reserve+cheese&oq=pleasant+ridge+res&gs_l=img.3.1.0j0i30k1j0i24k1l8.20544.25720.0.27394.22.16.2.4.4.0.171.1378.14j2.16.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.22.1542...0i67k1j0i5i30k1j0i10i24k1j0i8i30k1.0.7k-Cd0DrJGc

 

This American Gruyere inspired cheese from Wisconsin is my pick to represent Brock Lesnar. This cheese has won ton of awards and was actually at one point (and might still be) America’s “Most award winning cheese.” But, I dunno, I think it kinda stinks. The cheese is great when you first crack into it. Like if you start eating it that moment, it is great. Sweet and grassy, creamy and full flavored all at once. But the longer it goes without eating it the worse and worse it gets. It dries out and just wears out its welcome in general. If Brock vs Cena from Extreme Rules is the moment you open a Pleasant Ridge Reserve, the rest of the time it mirrors Brock’s return. At times you’ll get a good one and be surprised but so much of the time I’m left wondering “what’s the big deal with this?” Pleasant Ridge Reserve is probably a better cheese on average than Brock is a wrestler.

 

 

46) CM Punk – Rogue Original Blue Cheese -

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=WBIbW5ymK6S60PEP6JarmAw&q=Rogue+Oregon+Blue+Cheese&oq=Rogue+Oregon+Blue+Cheese&gs_l=img.3...5465.6209.0.6462.6.6.0.0.0.0.216.650.4j1j1.6.0....0...1c.1.64.img..2.0.0....0.KMM87hHY6Vc#imgrc=_

 

This started as one of those name picks. “CM Punk is a Rogue!” but I actually just realized some other good connections. Rogue Original Blue Cheese, made in Central Point, Oregon is an American Original that took its inspiration from the traditional French Roquefort. Rogue creamery used to produce a ton of cheddar for the war effor during the 1940s, but in the post-war 50s, the head cheese maker traveled to France to learn how to make Roquefort. He came back to Oregon and started making an American Cow’s milk version of the famous French Sheep’s milk classic. This can be used in the cheese-wrestler comparison to represent CM Punk’s obvious love of Japanese wrestling influencing his style of work that he put his own twist on. Rogue’s Original Blue is a great cheese that could never live up to the marvelous Roquefort, just like CM Punk was never going to be Kenta Kobashi. But both carved out wonderful careers full of critical acclaim from all the right people at all the right times in their career to become staples. Rogue Original Blue cheese is a better cheese than CM Punk is a wrestler but CM Punk might actually peak a tad bit higher under the perfect circumstances.

 

 

45) Harley Race - Moses Sleeper –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=YBIbW6fYIJes0PEPq52t6AY&q=Moses+Sleeper+Cheese&oq=Moses+Sleeper+Cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1.42405.45215.0.45424.20.16.0.4.4.0.167.1405.15j1.16.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.20.1495...0i67k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1j0i30k1.0.EUtWAyuv2xM

 

Harley was another guy I struggled with. He’s one of the most famous wrestlers on the list and has a high ranking, but he always seems overshadowed by the people surrounding him. Dory & Jack Brisco before him, Flair & Dusty after him. Terry Funk & Andre during his run. But Harely was good and sometimes really fucking great. He had a bunch of hits come out on NWA Classics. So I decided to go with Moses Sleeper. A soft ripened Caemembert inspired cheese from Vermont. It is unquestionably a very good and in the right condition great cheese. It is soft, buttery, but packs an earthy mushroomy punch that you might not expect. Unfortunately, it is distributed by the best affineurs in the country, the Cellars at Jasper Hill. This means Moses Sleeper, which would be the flagship cheese at your average cheese making facility, is overshadowed by some of the greatest cheeses the world has ever seen. Moses Sleeper, like Harley Race, rocks. It’s just hard to stand out when Ric Flair and Terry Funk are right there. Peak Harley Race is better than Moses Sleeper. But Moses Sleeper is way more consistent. If it piledrives you on the floor, you’re going to remember it.

 

 

44) Tully Blanchard - Ubriaco del Piave –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=jxIbW7RB4rXQ8Q-j-anIAg&q=ubriaco+del+piave&oq=Ubria&gs_l=img.3.5.0i67k1j0l9.26597.27292.0.30805.5.5.0.0.0.0.169.531.3j2.5.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.5.527....0.aataqZrCDLc

 

I kind of struggled with Tully Blanchard and so I went with Ubriaco del Piave, an aged Italian cow’s milk cheese bathed in a red wine. This is a really delicious, underrated cheese. I don’t really have a reason why I picked it for Tully to be honest. I just think Tully would have enjoyed a wine bath. Tully is better than Ubriaco del Piave, but doesn’t look as cool.

 

 

43) Rick Martel - Coulommiers –

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=xRIbW6_QO92-0PEP0ruBoAE&q=coulommiers+cheese&oq=coulommiers+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0j0i24k1l3.2636.3274.0.3469.6.3.0.3.3.0.145.311.2j1.3.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.6.395...0i30k1j0i8i30k1.0.0Eo-SP3C1vM

 

I picked Coulommiers for Rick Martel because it is a rich, creamy buttery triple cream brie style cheese that has every single quality you could possibly hope for out of a brie but simply isn’t as popular as a Brie de Meaux or a typical brie. Even though it is every bit as good. This is similar to how Rick Martel has existed for years in comparison to guys like Tito Santana or Ricky Steamboat. DUDE IS RIGHT THERE AND JUST AS GOOD. Rich, creamy, with slight mushroomy notes, Coulommiers is a super underrated cheese. I also think rich creamy bries are good representatives of the type of white meat babyface Martel is. But Rick Martel is actually probably a better wrestler than Coulommiers is cheese.

 

 

42) Ted DiBiase - Pule Cheese -

 

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=yhIbW_LGG7qT0PEPxZKX2AI&q=pule+cheese&oq=pule+cheese&gs_l=img.3..0l4j0i24k1l4.28777.30103.0.30263.11.9.0.2.2.0.191.886.6j3.9.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.11.941...0i67k1j0i30k1j0i5i30k1j0i8i30k1j0i10i24k1.0.vM0IZ8zYHNs

 

I picked Pule cheese to represent Ted Dibiase even though I’ve never had it and probably never will but I’ve seen fuck tons of Dibiase matches in my life. The reason is simple. Ted Dibiase was known as the Million Dollar Man. Pule cheese, made from Serbian Donkey Milk is the most expensive cheese in the world with people regularly paying over $1000 per pound. Seriously. No clue if its better than Dibiase but at over $1000 per pound, it fucking better be.

 

 

41) Riki Choshu - Capriole Farms O’Banon –

 

https://www.google.com/search?biw=951&bih=566&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=6hIbW9GAI8HQ9AP8hqygDg&q=o%27banon+cheese&oq=O%27Banon+&gs_l=img.3.0.0i24k1.15694.17347.0.18921.8.8.0.0.0.0.135.701.6j2.8.0....0...1c.1.64.img..0.8.698...0j0i8i30k1.0.sKgaXk7oDks

 

Riki was a difficult person to pick, but I went with Capriole Farms’ O’Banon. Capriole, based in southern Indiana, truly changed the game in American artisan cheeses and thrust it onto the world stage. O’Banon was very much a part of that. This was an American take on the famous French cheese Cabecou. This soft goat’s milk cheese is wrapped and slightly aged in a chestnut leaves soaked in Kentucky Woodford Reserve Bourbon. In the mid-late 80s, cheeses like this still weren’t being made in American and Capriole burst onto the scene and everything changed. The cheese is has a citrusy sweetness and booziness to it that is unforgettable. This is kind of the perfect cheese to use to represent the guy who changed Japanese wrestling in the 80s and 90s with almost every move he made. For a time Riki Choshu was pure gold. Capriole was and still is. O’Banon is a better cheese than Choshu is wrestler, but the impact is what draws the comparison together.

[gordi]

Stilton is an excellent comparison for Billy Robinson and I cannot fault your reasoning.

 

However, I would have gone with Lancashire Cheese, or more specifically the mature Tasty Lancashire (as opposed to the young Creamy Lancashire or the mass-produced Crumbly Lancashire... and even more specifically:

 

https://www.stamfordcheese.com/product/lancashire-bomb-cheese/

 

Maybe we can give that one to Marty Jones. He was #136 on the GWE.

 

I really like the comparison for Choshu as well. Makes sense to me.