Superstar Sleeze

Ric Flair vs Mick Foley - Summerslam 2006 I Quit I attended this match live in Boston headed into my senior year of high school and I remember thinking it was so violent it was unsettling. Finally watching it back and this is one of the most violent WWE matches of all time. I should have promoted Old Man Flair as Death Match Flair maybe he would have kept #1 spot for GWE. Flair’s punches are unreal in this match. They look so damn good. He has always had a good punch but damn. I didn’t love how the match started but after the Testicular Claw after the first Mr Socko this was gold. Chopping Foley with a Barbed Wire Mr Socko ruled. The 2006 weapon of choice the Barbed Wire rears its ugly head. Flair taps a gusher. His TLC Match against Edge was another level of blood but this was a lot. The thumb tacks and barbed wire bat. Loved telling Foley kiss my ass on the mic. The Ol Carlos Colon Ball shot and then goes wild with the Barbed Wire Bat! No one does unhinged like the Nature Boy. Sickening Nestea Plunge. The trainer tries to call off the match but Flair gets the line of the decade in with “This is not a lay on your ass match, this is an I Quit Match”. He goes for the eyes with the Barbed Wire Bat. I thought it was weird in 2006 and it is even weirder now is the whole Foley/Melina angle friendship, romance, perversion who knows? Melina throws in the towel and verbal says I Quit but Thats not good enough. When it looks like Flair was going to take the Barbed Wire Baseball Bat to Melina only then did Foley say I Quit. You always book yourself into a corner with an I Quit match unless it is a smarmy chicken shit heel like Tully or MJF who can survive or in fact thrive by saying those words. Flair and Foley are far too proud to say them thus the clusterfuck finish. It was better off being a Street Fight or Last Man Standing. The Melina shit was weird and I am pretty sure Foley just leaves. 2006 was a weird booking year in general. The feud felt random then And didnt really belong or advance the company forward But it was a helluva match. Another awesome 2006 Flair performance! The finish holds back from a full 4, *** 3/4

WWE Champion Edge vs Ric Flair - RAW 1/17/06 TLC Match Fuck the haters Old Man Flair Rules! I loved this match when I was a teenager I was shocked I hadn’t reviewed it which means I haven’t watched it in 20 years but man it still rocks. I never saw Edge’s Cash-In. I must have seen the highlights on RAW but watching it back with Vince introducing it and telling people not to leave gave it a bigger feel than the rinky dink run out but pull back at the last second bullshit. I was surprised they didn’t give Cena a hope spot. It was a couple Edge spears. This was Peak Edge. This is when he felt his hottest and biggest. The Cash-In is literally the only time I remember wrestling discussed in High School during class. The TLC match with Flair and the Live Sex Celebration with Lita are some of the most memorable moments of the era. Lita added so much to his act. I know they tried to duplicate it with Vickie but just didn’t work. It is too bad she didn’t stick around because they were on fire together. Teenage Marty Sleeze definitely loved him some Lita outfits back in the day, some real iconic ones. The match is a grueling hardcore brawl which focuses on violence without too much feng Shui. Flair’s Chops looked amazing. They ramped up the violence well from the back drop and suplex on the floor to a sick chair shot busting Flair open to the Edge splash from the ladder in the Ring through the table on the floor. Looked fucking awesome! Flair adapted to the environment dished out some violence but was just taking nutty bumps like a Superplex from ladder. The two hope spots were awesome! Tipping Edge off the ladder through a table on the outside always looks sick. The Figure-4 on Lita was a great spot and she sold it so well. Edge gets back up and wins the match But what a great fight. Spear! Cena saves Flair from another Conchairto. Cena ricochets the chair into his own head. This being in Flair Country with the Future Charlotte screaming really adds to the match. Old Garbage Man Flair rules! All Hail The GOAT! *** 3/4

Rob Van Dam vs Hardcore Holly - ECW 9/26/06 I am like 99% sure I watched this live as I gave up on ECW by the end of the year. Otherwise I would have seen the replay a million times elsewhere because this match is famous for the nasty gash on Holly’s back after he suplexes RVD from the apron through a table. Very famous spot. Before the table spot, I was pretty disappointed by the match. Very stilted both guys waiting a beat too long. Shit I expect out of today’s kids not 90s veterans. I liked that each opportunity for Holly was from RVD showboating or setting up the table. I always feel like Holly is someone I like because he is no-nonsense but he does NOT wrestle no-nonsense, smash mouth he is just blasé. After the table spot the open wound definitely adds to the match and as far as RVD’s Carrot Top Prop Wrestling goes the steel chairs were pretty done. Holly hits a couple nasty spots dropping throat first on an unfolded chair and then a leg drop on the chair. RVD gets on a suplex on chair right on the wound. So that really had to hurt. The Chair Throw block of the Five Star Frogsplash was sick. A really great Van Daminator! Five Star Frogsplash ends it. It is a weird matvh to rate because the beginning suck and the rest was prop high spots that were exciting but empty then everything gets amplified by the insane gash. That was pretty hardcore so only be generous and say *** 1/2

Mick Foley, Edge & Lita vs Terry Funk, Tommy Dreamer & Beulah - ECW One Night Stand 2006 Mick Foley’s pre match promo is pretty funny saying he loved ECW under Stephanie McMahon and Long Love The Alliance. It doesn’t get as much as heat as you expect probably because it was actually funny. Beulah comes out to challenge for a 6-Person tag. Honestly you can JIP to the Barbed Wire Board I didn’t really think there was anything special in the beginning maybe some Terry Funk nostalgia spots. They suplex the barbed wire board onto Dreamer and business picks up. Foley eats it worse on a Funk trip. I thought Edge would at least blade. Foley gets revenge on Terry Funk who gave him a black eye by cutting him open near the eye. This leads to the call back to the famous Lawler match and the match is cooking now. Funk gets carried to the back. Customary Dreamer Testicular Punishment with Lita leg dropping a barbed wire baseball bat onto his nuts. Edge gets his sexual harassment with Beulah in an abdominal stretch. This was peak Edge as a character. The act with Lita was so good. They were such a good sleaze act. It is when he felt most main event. Terry Funk makes his triumphant return with a barbed wire 2x4 which gets lit on fire by Beulah! He attacks Foley with it who takes a nasty bump into the barbed wire board. Then Funk gets sent careening onto the board with Foley. We get the CATFIGHT~! Dreamer has his little run hitting DVD on Lita and the Barbed Wire Crossface on Edge. Edge uses the Barbed Wire across for what I think is Edgecution. Spear to Beulah with sexually suggestive pin for extra sleaze heat. They have to cut Funk out of the barbed wire in a cool visual. The match takes a bit to get going but there’s a lot to love once the Barbed Wire gets going. Everyone plays their characters well Funk and surprisingly Edge are stand outs on the match. A good garbage match enhanced by the character work of everyone. ****

WWE Champion John Cena vs Rob Van Dam - ECW One Night Stand 2006 This is probably one of the most famous matches I have never seen. It should be even more famous because of excellent it is. The hostile crowd is a major selling point and the atmosphere totally delivers as expected. The throwing the shirt into the crowd and back into the ring was spectacular. The heat is off the charts! "If Cena Wins, We Riot" sign is iconic. But it is telling. It is NOT "If RVD Loses, We Riot". It is all about Cena. You could have sent out pretty much any ECW wrestler, Sandman, Dreamer, Sabu etc... and you would get the same reaction, but the match and the atmosphere hinge on Cena. John Cena is the draw. However, this match is a lot more than just great atmosphere it is an awesome match as well worked perfectly for this crowd. This is in my Fave Five of John Cena individual performances. He works the match like a heel perfectly. He adjusts so well. The more Cena I have watched the more it annoys me how quickly he goes into heat ala 90s Savage. Now he has a better extended comeback than 90s Savage, but still a little shine never killed anyone. This match he works the whole thing full on heel and the timing of his cutoffs is pitch perfect. He works the crowd into a lather brilliantly responding to each chant so wisely. "You cant wrestle"...Cradle Suplex. "Same Old Shit"...Top Rope Sledge to the floor. Even the fuck up in the match works because it gives the ravenous ECW crowd a chance to chant "You fucked up" at the Corporate Stooge/Icon. The whole match Cena wrestles with such great purpose. Every punch as oomph. Every time RVD looks like he is going to get something going like the mule kick or a dive, Cena has an answer. He is wrestling with ice water in his veins but at the same time he is visibly bristled by the reaction. It is a cool, seething anger. The type of anger that can be controlled and unleashed to devastating effects on your opponent. I loved the shove of the railing into the crowd and punching RVD with a Fuck You Cena sign. RVD eventually has to do something in the grand scheme of RVD Carrot Top bullshit it is not that annoying. Some spinning leg drops. I do like Rolling Thunder on the chair. What is more important than what RVD did is what it led to it was his first significant combination of moves that led to Cena putting the chair on top of himself to block the Split Legged Moonsault. Genius. Throwing the ECW bullshit back in their faces. RVD is all time great eater of DDTs but even better than that was the catapult through the chair. That was gnarly! I am sad we didnt get the Shoulder Blocks, but we do get the Protobomb and a great Five Knuckle Shuffle really soaking in the atmosphere. RVD Carrot Top Prop Comedy starts with the table, but Cena makes him pay with STFU for taking his eye off the prize. Another Brilliant Cutoff! Rope break and the ECW REF ENFORCES IT! Which smacks of hypocrisy and leads to Cena SLUGGING THE ECW REF! WHAT A GREAT SPOT! Cena the Corporate Golden Boy snaps and does the most anti-authority thing only leading to the Anti-Authority crowd still booing him. The beauty of tribalism in pro wrestling (in sucks in the real world). Cena shows off his otherworldly strength by smashing the ring steps into RVD and Nick Patrick counts 2. FU TO THE FLOOR! Which was a great spot looked violent but protected the move as there was no pinfall. A Mystery Man cough Edge cough spears Cena through the table RVD set up. Thank You Edge chants. This crowd is consistent in just one thing their hatred for Cena. They would sell their anti-authority souls to keep on hating Cena. Five Star Frogsplash! No ref so Paul Heyman comes out and counts the pin and the crowd pop is like an 8, when you think it should be an 11. I do think the finish was a little too WWE. I get that ultimately ECW was being spun off and that Cena/Edge was the big feud for the Summer of 06, BUT I thought the finish threw some water on the fire when there was whole lot of fire. This is such an anti-RVD match and it is so much better for it. They worked a Cena match through and through except Cena was a heel working a PERFECT pace. His timing was so good. Each cutoff was just sublime. They didnt let RVD do any of his stupid shit. He did enough selling and bumping to make the match work. He threw in a couple signature spots (I was surprised there was not Van Daminator). The match is a testament to Cena's wrestling IQ and really should be remembered as a classic in the canon. Cena Rules! **** 1/4

@ohtani's jacket post makes me want to rewatch this. Damn I got pumped up just reading that shit.

NWA US Champion Magnum TA vs Nikita Koloff - NWA Worldwide 8/23/86 Match #7 These two captured lightning in a bottle! I wouldn’t call either a great worker but this was a home run! Magnum feels like an incomplete case. He was just getting good and finally feeling big time when the accident happened. The crowd being absolutely molten got also helped. Mags shine is so fun and amplified the crowd. The crossbody near fall right off the bat the crowd was rocking. Dropkicking over the top. There was something about the Double Axehandle from the top that was just so big time, so king sized so electric. Sometimes a move is just a move but sometimes it is a MOVE~! And you know in that moment of time you have captured something special. We miss the transition to heat but we get a great Dustin-style bump on a missed crossbody and the way Nikita works the back is so good. The shoulder tackles driving Magnum into hard parts of ring is great. I loved the Bearhug. An all time great bear hug. Magnum does have an undeniable punch. Really fucking good! Loved loved the finish! Uncle Ivan gets piledriven on the floor. Electric! Tussle with Krushev the ref gets entangled. FLYING CHAIN RUSSIAN SICKLE 1-2-3! HOLY FUCK ALL TIME GREAT HEEL FINISH! THIS MATCH RULES! **** 1/2

Terry Funk vs Barry Windham - WWC 9/19/86 WWC Universal Title Tournament First Round I believe the only meeting between two legends that you think would have faced off against each other multiple times but not sure where and when their paths would have crossed. This is the WWC match that has stuck out to me as the match I really wanted to watch after a decade plus finally getting to it. BW starts off having some fun at Funk’s expense where his cowboy hat and Funk is down to stooge early. Hennig was not a bad pick for Mr Perfect but Windham is one of the most athletic men to ever wrestle. Watch how he nonchalantly catches a flying wooden chair with one hand from a Funk temper tantrum. Some see sawing on the top rope from Funk. All in good fun. Now it is time for the match to pick up on the outside. if you love piledrivers you will love this match, 5 total. Two from Funk on the outside here and a then a mule kick Ballshot because we are in Puerto Rico baby! In addition to how Windham catches that chair, watch he melts into his bumps especially a crazy one through the ropes to the floor. Such a stud. The heads collide and now it is BW’s turn. One of the best Windham control segments I have seen. Three piledrivers, two on the floor. Great punches of course. What makes this so great are the little wrinkles they throw in. When Windham misses an elbow drop he sells so well that you think it is leading to a heat segment. Instead he holds onto the top rope on a neck breaker and Funk goes crashing down. Excellent. Funk throws in some light heartedness acting so phased by repeated blows into the top turnbuckle that he is still seesawing until he falls out of the Ring head- first and ends up horse collaring a chair and feeding for Windham punches. Excellent! BW LARIAT! Barry thinks he gets the pin but Funk rolls him up for the win im a very 80s finish for BW to save face. Funk’s promo against Rick Martel is fun at first saying he is cattle rancher not a pig farmer and Puerto Rico is full of pigs but takes a darker turn when he references that Martel’s life-ending heart attack that happened on the island. This was awesome real slam bang stuff no down time that was elevated by Funk’s humor/creativity and Windham’s athleticism. ****

WWC Universal Champion Carlos Colon vs Tully Blanchard - WWC 1983 I believe the commentary team is Hugo Sanovich and Bobby Jaggers it is helpful on some ways and distracting & annoying in others but it is totally worth it for Jaggers mispronouncing flagrant as fragrant. The idea of fragrant violation in response to a ball shot had me laughing so hard I had to pause the video. Everything Flair detractors say about Flair being weak applies to Tully a hundredfold. I like Tully but this is not a wrestler with much in the way of offense or working on top. He is the ultimate stooge and heat seeker. This is very compatible with Colon’s style as Tully can pinball and stooge off of Colon’s punches and draw heat by stalling and short cuts. We get that with a foreign object and throwing Colon out of the Ring multiple times and brawling at the railing. I thought the first Colon comeback started lame. Kind of like I am over this I am going to fights back and do a ROUNDOFF~! But even though transition was lame the match really picked up here. Loved the atomic drop on the railing. Love AWA-style spot where Tully gets his foot on the rope so Colon attacks it and works it over building to the Figure-4. We get the Fragrant Mule Kick Ballshot! I didn’t like Tully getting right back on offense after that. Good use of the ref to blind Colon coming off the top eating a punch. I liked the ref bump leading to ref table topping Tully on a suplex attempt got three. This match is proof even 1980s matches needed an editor. I think if switch the order of some of the spots you could have really whipped me and the crowd into a frenzy. I would say this is a fragrant *** 1/2 match.

WWC Universal Champion Carlos Colon vs Bruiser Brody - WWC 1984 Chain Match I dont think I have ever heard Brody speak before. Totally kills the aura. He shouldn’t speak. Lame promo. I like Brody more than most and this was a good Brody performance. He is easily better than Abby in my opinion but far worse than Hansen. This is nowhere near as good as Hansen Bullrope match as this is also touch four corners match. I like how Brody needs to be beaten down and pinned down to chain him to Colon. He blindsides Colon but with the belt and punch he can hold him down. Colon kicks some ass inside and outside the Ring. Brody comes back using the chain to thrust at Colon’s throat, wrapping the chain around Colon’s eyes is the money shot of the match. Brody kicks some ass on the outside he is the first to touch corners. Colon starts rifling him shots. Brody has such a good register with the hair. Bodyslam by Colon! WOW! Colon starts going for corners. Brody’s ally gives him a kidney shot and Colon collapses into the fourth corner for the classic 80s fuck finish. I mean Brody didnt even have to be pinned he couldn’t have just been KO’d for the fourth corner. Always got to save that heat. There is way more heat for the managers to brawl as Brody decks Colin’s buddy but Colon beats both the heels back to the dressing room before checking on his compadre. Very good double juice brawl with some nice chain usage. Both have better matches but this is good. *** 1/2

WWC Universal Champion Carlos Colon vs Ric Flair - WWC 10/16/82 Ric Flair is the NWA World Heavyweight Champion but they make it clear that Flair is challenging for Colon’s Universal Title as Colon is billed as “Campeon” and Flair, “Retador”. However I still didn’t expect a clean finish. Excellent Flair title defense! I was really interested to see how Colon fit within the Flair Formula and just how how Colon would work Championship style match. I wish we had more of this style from Colon. Amateur riding to start from Flair but Colon escapes. Colon grabs a hammerlock and basically doesnt let go for 10 minutes. Typically great Flair in how he makes Colon fight through his offense to earn the arm work. Flair tries the chops but Colon wrenches him down with the wristlock. Flair tries to turn it into a track meet but Colin stays disciplined laser focused on the arm. Here comes the Flair roughhousing the knee lifts, the elbows but Colon won’t give up. It takes a well timed Headbutt to the midsection or was it lower Ahhhhh the beauty of pro wrestling to get Colon off his game. Classic Flair rough housing and crowding but he isn’t in there with just any Jamoke this is fiery Carlitos Colon and two fire fights that break out in the corner are just money reminiscent of Garvin and Wahoo! Flair powders! Hell Yeah! Flair is able to go to his old stand by and throw Colon out of the Ring twice to take over. One thing that is unexpected is how much bigger Flair is than Colon. Colon disappears behind Flair at times and we forget how big Flair really is. Hoists Colon up for two snake eyes which was cool. Gutwrench, butterfly, delayed vertical suplexes. Flair’s punches in the corner are so underrated. He crashes down on the knee. When Flair is feeling it, there’s nothing better. Electric. Figure-4. Colon reverses it! Colon Press Slam! Colon FIGURE-4! Dueling Figure-4s. Flair eye rake! Back Suplex! Great organic transition into the piledriver and smashing Colon’s head into the exposed part of the turnbuckle and the post busting him open. Excellent! Flair’s elbows and those rapid fire punches to the open wound on the head are amazing! He has such an underrated punch. He looks unhinged. This is an all time great Flair heat segment. Colon gets a couple babyface hope spots the sunset flip and the crossbody. Flair freaks out and throws him back outside and wants to smash Carlitos head into more steel but ends him tasting steel! I bite on the double Countout here hard. Flair is reeling. MULE KICK BALLSHOT! Ultimate act of desperation. Nobody does it better. You felt like everything was slipping away from Flair and out of desperation he takes the low road! SLEEPER! Colon falls forward! FIRE FIGHT BREAKS OUT! COLON KNOCKDOWNS FLAIR! ROUNDOFF~! PUERTO RICO IS ROCKING! FLAIR FLIP! The crowd believes! Flair double leg…feet on the ropes. Flair argues with the ref. O’Connor Roll 1-2-No! Flair hip toes! BLOCKED! BACKSLIDE 1-2-3! PUERTO RICO AND ME IN BED JUST LOST MY SHIT This had two things going for it that most Flair matches dont the first and biggest they could give us a BIG CLEAN BABYFACE VICTORY In front of the Hometown Crowd because this was for Colon’s title and not Flair’s. Being the 80s I did NOT think we would get one even though it was possible because of it being for Universal Title. That was sick. The other thing is we have very few Flair matches where he is so much bigger than his opponent and those matches are special. He can really manhandle and sink his teeth into a heat segment. I am a massive Flair fan and this is one of his best heat segments of all time. Colon brings that Garvin/Wahoo dimension and kickass stand and bang fire fights. Dueling Figure-4s were great. This should be heralded as one of the all time great Championship Style matches! **** 1/2

lol I have already watched this match. I watched this morning and really liked all the same things. I am upping it to **** 1/2. I will say I liked it in the context of watching it after seeing Flair against Tony Colon and Jerry Finley. Against Tony, he is in complete control it is just chops and a suplex Figure 4 win. Finley is able to get a toehold and kick out of the gutwrench suplex But the butterfly -> Figure-4 win it. Here Tommy Gilbert gets more like a typical Flair opponent winning tests of strength. Coming back from multiple suplexes. He gets a fun blast with the dropkicks. I loved the misses dropkick leading to his dropkick. Really fun studio match looking forward to Flair vs Colon.

Andre The Giant vs Abdullah The Butcher - WWC 9/17/83 They bring in Andre for their big 10th anniversary show and I believe Colon works a draw against NWA Champ Harley Race so bringing out their big guns. Hell Yeah! This ruled! Fro Andre is best Andre! He was moving and hitting like a wild man! Those sledgehammer punches/forearms and mighty headbutts looked killer! Butt butt in the corner! This is a violent, vicious giant. I didn’t know how Abby was going to take over but here come the throat thrusts. Andre sells so well. He fights from his back swinging wild bear paws. This has a big fight feel! Two larger than life characters! I like how commentary the Largest Wrestler vs Most Violent Wrestler! The Giant vs The Madman! It spills to the outside and Andre hits Abby with a fence for a double Countout. This was trending 4+ But abrupt finish leaves wanting more but we don’t get more. *** 1/2

Champion Abdullah the Butcher vs Carlos Colon - WWC September 1981 Everyone agrees this is from Trinidad & Tobago and 1981. Cagematch thinks it is 8/11 but Colon is North American Champion but loses the title. But Abby comes out with the belt. PWO has settled for September and maybe for the West Indies title. Either way this is a great match and maybe my favorite of these two. Helps they are 5 years younger and Colon has a great Stache in this and looks so much more youthful. It is not really different from their other matches, punches, throat thrusts, headbutts, biting, ball shots blood lots and lots of blood. It is how they do it. Colon had a little extra zip that comes from being 5 years younger and his punches looked gnarlier. The work on Abby’s ear was sick but ultimately it is a forehead bladejob. Abby’s selling clicked more with me here than elsewhere. Here he felt feral rather than a tub of goo just absorbing pain & punishment. Like he was waiting for the right moment to strike. I thought his strikes looked a million times better here. Throat thrusts had some oomph. There was a great straight right that stopped Colon in his tracks. It felt like more of a fight. Abby was timing his strikes better and sending with force. Love them trading BALLSHOTS. We get trademark Colon round off. The head ramming into the post looked great. There was a sense of fight for survival as they got back to the Ring. Abby dropped two tub of goo elbow drops. Colon kicks out of both. The ref calls the match off though in a weak finish. It makes the match feel incomplete as there felt like each had more to give and there was more meat on the bone. The Colon/Abby match with the most vim & vigor. A better finish gets it to 4 but going *** 3/4

Carlos Colon vs Terry Funk - WWC 9/21/86 WWC Universal Championship Tournament Finals The capper to the great WWC Universal Championship Tournament and the 13th Anniversary Show which must represent a high water mark for WWC. After all those Abby matches, Terry Funk is a breath of fresh air. Someone who can actually move and bump for Colon. I know this match is famous as the Finals of a famous Tournament but it should be famous for being a great match as well. It is the Terry Funk Show. You can see why his fans think he think he is the greatest wrestler of all time. If you love his brand of entertainment, there is no one better. He trips on his poncho, he feeds on a layout across the top turnbuckle and then perfectly feeds for seesaw punches in the middle rope (take notes, Muraco) and then of course the stumbling and bumbling in the crowd wiping out chairs throwing chairs. Classic stuff. Funk’s heat segment is also good shit: piledriver on the outside, punches and smashing Colon’s head into the post. Love the side headlock, trick knee Ballshot. Funk works a sleeper. What really puts this over the top for me is Colon throws it all back in Funk’s face with a Ballshot and a piledriver on the floor. I love that symmetry. All your Colon favorites good punches, headbutts, ROUNDOFF~!, TOE TOUCH! I liked the Figure-4 work and bit on it as well as Funk collapsing on a suplex attempt because of his knee. Junior hits him with a boot. 1-2-NO! Good heel nearfall. Very creative and inventive finish. They trade headbutts progressively get more groggy. Colon gets the final Headbutt for the win. Excellent Terry Funk match very entertaining **** 1/4